Tag: stress transformation

Conscious or default positivity?

Post author By Toby
Post date December 13, 2021

“Conscious positivity allows for a tremendous range of feelings and emotions to be present that may not be ‘positive’, but that if we repress or deny would take us away from our authentic response to what is going on, and to move away from the truth“

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at the phenomenon of ‘positive thinking, and makes a few distinctions that will be helpful in your own practice of it.

I’m in the process of putting together the program for later in the month, and the new year, a few details below the article.

In the spirit of conscious positivity,

Toby

Conscious or default positivity?

“There is a meaningful difference between default positivity and conscious positivity. Default positivity is when we turn to positivity as a mechanism, a bypass, a defense against owning or feeling the shadow. Often birthed in challenging life experiences, this pseudo bliss trip can keep us alive during tumultuous times, but it can also become an embedded way of being that detaches us from our truth. Conscious positivity is birthed in authenticity and awareness.” – Jeff Brown

What really constitutes positive thinking? On the surface of it looks fairly simple, “Just look on the bright side of life”, “See the good in the situation”, “Make lemonade out of lemons”, “No point in dwelling on it (the negative or difficult)”.
However, if we start to look at it a bit more closely, it becomes much more nuanced. Below are a few distinctions that may be useful.

Default or reflex positivity
Default positivity is the position of automatically / quickly adopting a ‘positive’ perspective or reaction on order to smother or repress difficult feelings (emotions, thoughts, reactions) that we feel uncomfortable about or threatened by. It is a way of bypassing the thing that we are really experiencing.

An example
Recently I won a court case. It had been one that had been going on for a while. It was certainly a relief to have won, but the after the victory experience was a bitter-sweet, mixed emotion affair with a degree of ambiguity. If I had been uncomfortable about those feelings of ambiguity, I could have felt the need to go out for a celebration, affirm the victory with friends and people congratulating me. I could have spent a lot of time inwardly talking to myself about the victory and how it was born of strength and courageousness and all that. I could have created a ‘high’. I didn’t do that, but I’d felt the need to cover up my feelings, I could have reverted to this type of reflex positivity.

Conscious positivity or mental framing
Conscious positivity allows for a tremendous range of feelings and emotions to be present that may not be ‘positive’, but that if we repress or deny would take us away from our authentic response to what is going on, and to move away from the truth. By ‘truth’ I mean our own inner truth, but also a connection with the objective, outer truth of what’s going on. Conscious positivity comes from a place that is inwardly confident enough and wise enough to allow for difficult and contradictory feelings to be present, whilst at the same time framing what’s going on in a constructive way.

An example
To return to the example of the court case above, it would be true to say that:

I felt rather sad that the situation had come to this point
I felt somewhat sorry for the other party
I felt quite angry about the silliness of it all
I reflected on it as partly a comment on the contradictory state of mind and emotions that many people seem to be stuck in these days

Whilst allowing for all these things, I also practiced conscious positivity, noting that:

I had achieved my stated objectives, and that there would be genuinely good results coming
I felt I had developed aspects of my character that will stand me in good stead in the future
I noted the increase of knowledge I had around the legal profession and process
I gave permission to myself to feel genuinely good, even in the face of my own ambiguity

Positivity without suppression or denial
The example above, is an example of conscious positivity, and avoiding the temptation and pitfall of default positivity. What are the areas of your life that you could start making the distinction between these two, and what possibilities might it open up for you?

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Tuesday 21st December, 7.30-8.30pm, SG time – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation (Online only)

This will be a chance to reflect on the spiritual meaning of Christmas and power of the winter season. We will look at the different ways our own inner light can ‘die and be re-born once more’.

It is a good time to attune to the creative energies within ourselves. We can think about the new year & spring periods that lie ahead of us, what our goals & expectations are, & sow the seeds on an inner level of that which we wish to manifest over the next few months…read full details

Tues & Weds 4th & 5th January – 2022 New year & New Moon releasing and inviting meditation

This meditation session is focused upon setting up the 2022 new year energies in a way that invites the best possible experience moving forward. We will be:

Releasing and letting go of energies, events and experiences from the past year that may hold us back from moving into our full potential
Developing a flexible, soft, ‘beginners mind’, renewed and ready to be ‘born again’ with energy and enthusiasm in 2022
Focusing both consciously and intuitively upon the inviting of new energies, aspirations and goals that we wish to bring in and manifest over the course of the new year…read full details

Begins Tues 11/Weds 12^th January – The ordinary path to enlightenment – Meditating with the Ten Ox Herding pictures

This series of 10 classes is an introduction to simple, practical Zen and Taoist meditations that can temporarily help us to reduce our stress and thrive joyfully in daily life. They can also, practiced regularly offer us experiential insight into our true nature and help us to answer some of our deepest life-questions and attain a truly stable sense of inner transformation. The sessions can be attended as a complete course in itself, or each class can be taken as a practice in and of itself…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday 21st December, 7.30-8.30pm, SG time – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation (Online only)

Tues & Weds 4th & 5th January – 2022 New year & New Moon releasing and inviting meditation

Begins Tues 11/Weds 12^th January – The ordinary path to enlightenment – Meditating with the Ten Ox Herding pictures

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindful positivity, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, stress transformation

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Inner sensitivity – Listening to yourself

Post author By Toby
Post date December 7, 2021

“Become an ear that gives heed to every single thing the universe is saying”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores sensitivity, and in particular sensitivity through listening as an object of mindful attention and development.
The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom sessions is this week, either on Tuesday or Wednesday are on the subject of the article, so if you enjoy it do feel free to come along, live or online!

In the spirit of sensitivity,

Toby

Inner sensitivity – Listening to yourself

SENSITIVITY
“How shall I experience my oneness with creation?”
“By listening,” said the Master.
“And how am I to listen?”
“Become an ear that gives heed to every single thing the universe is saying. The
moment you hear something you yourself are saying, stop.” – Anthony De Mello, One Minute Wisdom

This article is essentially a series of ‘pointing out’ instructions regarding how you can mindfully listen to yourself. By ‘listen’ I really mean be sensitive to the inner dialogue that is going on within you not just on the mental, cognitive level, but also:

On the sensory and somatic level – What your body is communicating to you through sensations
On the emotional level – What feelings and moods are communicating themselves to you non-verbally
On the intuitive level – The messaged that are just ‘popping into your awareness’ and that often seem to have nothing to do with your everyday psychological inner narrative

So, when I say ‘listen’ below, implicitly I also mean be receptive to senses, feelings and intuitions.

Listening to your inner commentator without commenting on the inner commentary
The first position we adopt is to work on allowing the inner commentary to happen without a secondary commentary judging the commentary. For example, if the inner voice is saying “I feel afraid”, then try and stay with that. Often there is a second voice that comes up to say something like “Don’t be silly, only weak people are afraid”, and tries to push “I am afraid” out of your awareness. Try and stay with the primary inner comment, not the secondary one. Put the second one down, and listen to the first voice (or sensation, or feeling) without judging it or pushing it away.
The first practice then is hearing the primary commentary non-judgmentally. Don’t be a hurry to get past this one, invest quality time in it!

Putting down the commentary
When you are ready, you can practice putting down the primary inner commentator. On a sensory level this would be relaxing and releasing tense sensations in the body, letting the body come into balance. On an emotional and feeling level similarly, it means gently releasing present emotions, and allowing the emotional nature to return to a calm, balanced condition for a period.
Part of the trick of this second position is to let go of the need to comment on stuff, just for a while. No need to judge, fix, solve, just a space of allowing, relaxation and presence.
At this stage you can also start to notice the other things that are there when your normal everyday voice is silent, that you might poetically call “voices from the Universe to you!”

Reworking the commentary
When you let the commentary come back online, you can start suggesting constructive changes to your inner commentator, that invite the commentary to become different and perhaps better. But don’t be in a hurry to get to this stage, if you do the preceding stages, then this one will start to come fairly naturally, in its own time.

Listening to others
When you can listen to yourself in the way described above, you can apply the same template to listening to others, and to your environment. You’ll be surprised at how differently what you hear is as a result!

Related article: Four ways of working with your inner voice

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed this article last week: ‘Head in the Sun’ meditation

This is a simple meditation that combines cultivating a thought-free state with environmental awareness. Specifically, we use brain-relaxation in combination with awareness of the suns light to create the desired experience.

Finding the sun – This first stage is nice to do, and enhances the experience, but is not essential. Glance outside and locate the sun, physically in the sky. Get a sense of where it is in your current landscape. If the sun has gone down already, get a sense of where it is beneath the horizon.

Sitting in landscape – Then take a seat (this can also be done standing or lying and, when your used to it, walking) Send your awareness out to the horizon line in the landscape around you. Get a feel for the curve of the earth’s surface extending around you from your feet, the sun in the sky above, and the living planet beneath you. Breath and relax with this for a short while.
Read full article

Starts Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17^th November – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom

In a sentence: Learn the art of ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom through integrative meditation
Overview: The Wisdom of Awakening series is an ongoing series that looks at different ways to ‘wake up’ and live your life fully and playfully through meditation. The premise of the sessions is that inner wholeness and wisdom are not something that are far away, rather they are something that we can awaken to ‘instantly’ through certain types of mindful attention. In this four class series we take instant awakening, miraculous-ness, independence and sensitivity as our doorways to awakening….read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17^th November – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation in singapore, mindful listening, mindful sensitivity, mindfulness in Singapore, stress transformation

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The meditators secret weapon (the wisdom of non-thinking)

Post author By Toby
Post date November 15, 2021

“Once you have non-thinking in the mix, you can then return to your senses and thinking refreshed, really enjoying participating in them, rather than feeling stuck on a continuous ‘hamster wheel’ of thinking and sensing. You can start to think better, and have more fun doing so”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at the wisdom of non-thinking, one of my favorite subjects!
If you enjoy the article, I have a new series of meditation classes starting this Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17th – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom, its the last series of the year, full of ways to activate your own natural widsom.

Then this weekend I’ll be starting the Environmental meditation masterclass & mini-retreat – Working consciously with the forces of nature. If your curious about how to bond deeply with nature through meditation, then this is a great session to come along to!

In the spirit of natural non-thinking,

Toby

The meditators secret weapon (the wisdom of non-thinking)

What is it about being a meditator that makes you more resilient to stress, the unknown, uncertainty, misfortune and the multitude of life’s other challenges? This is a question that can be answered in a number of different ways, but the one I want to explore here can be captured in one expression: Non-thinking.

The normal pattern of a person’s attention
For most people whilst they are awake, their attention toggles between:

Their sensory awareness, navigating physical obstacles, looking at stuff, listening and so on and
Thinking. Thinking about what they experience with their senses, about their work, their problems, what to plan, their pleasures ect…

Sensing and thinking, with the attendant emotions and feelings, is the basic pattern of a person’s consciousness. This is fine if life is all non-stress and enjoyment. But if it isn’t all that way like mine (and I suspect yours), then this pattern can become stressful and tiring, especially when your mind cannot stop thinking about stuff, over-analyzing and generally going a bit too fast.

The pattern of a meditator’s daily attention
So of course, a meditators attention also includes sensing and thinking. But as well as these two, her or his awareness also regularly includes non-thinking, or periods of time where they ‘drop out’ of their mind, and let their sensory attention rest also. They practice doing no-thing, going no-where, and being no-one. They let their mind and attention rest in the regenerative state of thoughtlessness.

The joy and wisdom of non-thinking
Initially, non-thinking looks valueless in the sense of nothing seems to be getting done! However, in this state of non-doing:

The self can recover its energy and sense of harmony
Problem’s ‘change’ in the sense that when you put them down for a while and come back to them, they literally seem different(!)
The joy of simple presence becomes manifest
You discover that you can be in charge of the pace of your life, rather than your compulsive thinking

The joy of thinking and the senses
Once you have non-thinking in the mix, you can then return to your senses and thinking refreshed, really enjoying participating in them, rather than feeling stuck on a continuous ‘hamster wheel’ of thinking and sensing. You can start to think better, and have more fun doing so!

Glimpsing non-thinking
Its easy to get discouraged with non-thinking, simply because if you are trying to do it for the first time it can seem difficult to do. However, if you watch your mind, you will start to notice that every now and again, naturally there will be a gap in your thoughts. If you notice those spaces as you watch and stay with them, then you start to glimpse non-thinking, just for a second or two at a time. If you practice this for a few minutes each day, then you’ll go from one second to three, to five to ten and so on. Five minutes of this, five days a week over a month will be enough to build your basic competency, which is not much, especially considering what you have to gain!

The sun between the clouds
Once you have your basic non-thinking space, you can brighten it in the following way: Imagine that the spaces between your thoughts are like watching the sky between the clouds. Imagine the sun is shining in that sky, so it is a bright, living space, rather than a blank, cold one. This simple imaginary practice can accelerate the speed at which you are able to experience the brighter, living dimensions of your consciousness that lie beyond your thinking mind. These levels are deeply regenerative and help give a glow to your whole interior space.
Enjoy your non-thinking!

Related article: Awakening to your innate wisdom

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Starts Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17^th November – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom

Saturday 20th & 27th November – Environmental meditation masterclass & mini-retreat – Working consciously with the forces of nature

In a sentence: Learn to work consciously with the forces of nature and your environment as well develop powerful meditation states.

There is much concern and talk today about the state of the environment and the relationship of humankind to nature. These sessions cover methods to:

Attune to the energies of our immediate and larger environment
Build a living relationship to the landscape around us
Access meditation states based upon our environment that provide deep powerful peace, as well as increasing our energy in an harmonious manner
Increase our sense of being a participant in the miracle of nature
Inspire us to live an embodied life in tune with the living Earth and Universe around, above and below us

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17^th November – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom

Saturday 20th & 27th November – Environmental meditation masterclass & mini-retreat – Working consciously with the forces of nature

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, non-thinking, stress transformation

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Awakening to your innate wisdom

Post author By Toby
Post date November 9, 2021

“As we get older it becomes easier and easier to spend time on auto-pilot, just using our habitual mind to cruise through our day without really being vibrantly alive to our experience. To be a meditator is to commit to that NOT happening”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article focuses on how to activate your innate wisdom, or your potential for wisdom in the moment, Enthusiasm for this practice then naturally leads to mature wisdom over time.
If you enjoy the article, I have a new series of meditation classes starting on November Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17th – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom, your most welcome to join in, either live or online!

In the spirit of wisdom,

Toby

Awakening to your innate wisdom

“Is there such a thing as One Minute Wisdom?’
“There certainly is,” said the Master.
“But surely one minute is too brief?”
“It is fifty-nine seconds too long. “
To his puzzled disciples the Master later said. “How much time does it take to catch
sight of the moon?”
“Then why all these years of spiritual endeavor?”
“Opening one’s eyes may take a lifetime. Seeing is done in a flash. “

The quote above is from Anthony De Mello’s ‘One Minute wisdom’. Sometime it can feel as if our wisdom is a long way off, or something that we have to work hard and long to acquire over a lifetime, or even lifetimes. From the point of view of experiential mindfulness and meditation however, we can start to connect o our own innate wisdom, that is the wisdom that is already present in us, right now. So how do we do that?

From unconscious to conscious
Meditation from one point of view is to be experiencing something, and to be aware that you are experiencing it. So, for example:

You are experiencing my body right now. If you then become aware of your experience of the body, you them move into a meditative relationship, which is to say a conscious one, with your body
Similarly, if I am experiencing anxiety, and I then become aware of that anxiety, I move into a mindful state around the anxiety, I am awake to it
Likewise, if I am daydreaming, and I become conscious of the daydreaming state, then I ‘awaken’ to it, I become present to it

Innate wisdom doesn’t mean that you always know exactly what to do in any given situation, it means being awake to the situation, knowing you are there, and feeling alive within that moment. If you are conscious of what’s present for you in the moment, then you are then going to be bring whatever knowledge that you have to the table in order to ‘solve’ whatever presenting problems there may be. If there is no presenting problem, then you can simply enjoy being awake and grasping what the moment has to offer.
In the De Mello quote above the Master comments on how long it takes to awaken our innate wisdom:
“But surely one minute is too brief?”
“It is fifty-nine seconds too long. “
You can literally go from being ‘asleep’ unconscious and/or ignorant in one moment, to being ‘awake’ in the next. Its simply a matter of becoming aware or conscious of what you are experiencing. To awaken in this way means you give birth to your wisdom in that moment. It needs only a second!

The strengthening of the conscious mind
From another point of view, meditation can be defined as “The strengthening of the conscious mind and its function”. Rather than being a formal, sit-down practice, in this sense meditation is more of a deep commitment to live consciously rather than unconsciously, to be awake to life rather than sleep-walking though it. As we get older it becomes easier and easier to spend time on auto-pilot, just using our habitual mind to cruise through our day without really being vibrantly alive to our experience. To be a meditator is to commit to that NOT happening. It means to commit to being conscious, and to use the wisdom of being conscious.

“Then why all these years of spiritual endeavor?”
“Opening one’s eyes may take a lifetime. Seeing is done in a flash. “
In this final section of the story, the Master clarifies; we can awaken our innate wisdom in a flash, but this does not make us a Master. However, if we commit to awakening our innate wisdom in this moment, and the next and the next, then our wisdom gradually matures and develops in capability. Mature wisdom takes a lifetime, but the next step is always right in front of you.

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Starts Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17^th November – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom

Saturday 20th & 27th November – Environmental meditation masterclass & mini-retreat – Working consciously with the forces of nature

In a sentence: Learn to work consciously with the forces of nature and your environment as well develop powerful meditation states.

There is much concern and talk today about the state of the environment and the relationship of humankind to nature. These sessions cover methods to:

Attune to the energies of our immediate and larger environment
Build a living relationship to the landscape around us
Access meditation states based upon our environment that provide deep powerful peace, as well as increasing our energy in an harmonious manner
Increase our sense of being a participant in the miracle of nature
Inspire us to live an embodied life in tune with the living Earth and Universe around, above and below us

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Begins Tues 14/Weds 15^th September – Integral Polarity Meditation – Exploring Earth, Lunar & ‘Vertical’ Polarities

Starts Tuesday 16/Wednesday 17^th November – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom

Saturday 20th & 27th November – Environmental meditation masterclass & mini-retreat – Working consciously with the forces of nature

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, stress transformation

A Mind of Ease Biographical Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Mindfully dis-agreeable

Post author By Toby
Post date October 19, 2021

Dear Integral Meditators,

One of the reasons we shy away from dis-agreeable people and energy is that it can feel pretty volatile, even violent at times. This doesn’t mean we can avoid it however, it makes it an even more important aspect of ourselves that we need to master in the right way. The article below explores how to do start doing this.

Heads up for this weeks Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session on Tuesday & Wednesday evenings, and for the start next Monday of The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood.

In the spirit of agreeably dis-agreeable,

Toby

Mindfully dis-agreeable

Recently I’ve been encountering some dis-agreeable people in my life, and I’ve also noticed my coaching clients are facing a few as well! Being by nature a fairly agreeable person, I find dealing with people who are dis-agreeable quite challenging. This is not necessarily because they are ‘bad’ and I am ‘good’. Rather it is because they feel comfortable and even enjoy conflict, whereas for me I prefer reconciliation, co-operation, consideration and other ‘agreeable’ ways of interacting. Over the years it’s become very clear to me that, if you are a kind gentle person without an appropriately dis-agreeable side, then this places you at a big dis-advantage in life. You need to have access to gentleness and kindness, balanced by the capacity to manage conflict appropriately.

The higher and lower expressions of dis-agreeable
One of the reasons you might be reluctant to embrace your dis-agreeable side is that you confuse it with outright negativity. You may equate dis-agreeable with qualities like:

Delusional and paranoid
Grumpy or negatively angry
Unreasonable
Emotionally immature or stunted
Sociopathic or psychopathic tendencies
Physically or psychologically abusive or violent

However, dis-agreeable can also mean the appropriate, balanced capacity to be appropriately

Assertive and powerful
Just and fair
Protective of self and others
Defend boundaries
Stand up to bullies
Tell the and/or your truth

This second list of dis-agreeable qualities I think you can see are important to develop and own within yourself.

Agreeable is always good?
Contrastingly, we often have the idea that ‘agreeable’ is always a good quality. It means you are a person who is kind, caring, conciliatory, looking for compromise, considerate and so on. However, the lower quality of imbalanced agreeable people includes

Being submissive and weak
Running away from conflict
Avoiding reality, living in a dreamworld
Can’t speak up for themselves
Avoids an argument of conversation that needs having
Is an escapist
Represses their anger and becomes vulnerable to depression or low self-esteem

So then, to learn to be ‘good’ at dis-agreeability means:

To learn to be happy to be in conflict with someone and hold your space/position
Stop hoping the other person will be reasonable, and just take each transaction one at a time without overly stressing about it
Learn to tolerate and even enjoy dis-agreements
To not be intimidated by the anger or aggression of others
To own your own positive anger and aggression in the service of the good and the true

One of the reasons we shy away from dis-agreeable energy is that it can feel pretty volatile and even violent at times. This doesn’t mean we can avoid it however, it makes it an even more important aspect of our energy that we need to master in the right way!
The next time you are in a space where there is conflict, and where there are dis-agreeable people around, pay attention, there is a lot to train in and get mindfully better at!

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Tues 19th & Weds 20th October – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

About the meditation: We all live our life within an environment that consists fundamentally/experientially of the Earth, Moon, Sun and Stars. The monthly lunar cycle describes our relationship to the Moon, and the powerful influence that it has on our life. In the physical world we see this influence most obviously in the tides of the sea. In our inner life we experience it as the coming and going of energy, moods and emotions within our psyche. This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to…read full details

Starts Monday October 25th – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

How can you move from coping to thriving in your life as a man?

Much is asked of men in their traditional roles as fathers and sons, partners and husbands, students and teachers, employees and employers. The men’s group is a professionally moderated and confidential forum for men. A forum is a safe place for exploring, learning and sharing the successful perspectives, skills, and strategies needed to address and manage the unique issues, problems, and triumphs in our community…read full details

Tues & Weds 26&27th October – Samhain Meditation (Live & Online) – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors

Samhain (Aka All hallows eve, or Halloween) is the time in the northern hemisphere when we enter the darker months of the year & winter. Traditionally it is said to be the time when the veil between the world of the living and the inner world of our ancestors is said to be thinnest. Consequently, it is an ideal time for us to commune with our ancestors in meditation…read full details

Friday 5th November 7.30-8.30pm – Online New moon beginners mind, health visualization & envisioning session

About the session: This class is done monthly around the turn of the new moon and enable us to open to new beginnings, new possibilities and make a fresh start, specifically with regard to physical health and psychological wellbeing
“A picture speaks a thousand words” as the saying goes! In meditation we use two main methods:

Visualization – The conscious use of images and imagery to invoke a better present moment and future experience of health
Envisioning – The seeking of spontaneous inner visions that connect us to sources of health & support in the imaginal world, and inspire us toward greater levels of energy energy and wellbeing

Read full details…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Life Coaching and Meditation coaching 3-6month packages are on a 15% offer up until Weds 20th October. If getting some coaching is an idea you have been contemplating, then this is a good opportunity to get it and save some money on the price.

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Begins Tues 14/Weds 15^th September – Integral Polarity Meditation – Exploring Earth, Lunar & ‘Vertical’ Polarities

Saturday October 16th & 23^rd, 10am-4pm – Breathwork Masterclass & Mini-Retreat– Improve physical immunity, wellbeing and inner peace though deep breathing

Starts Monday October 25th – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Tues & Weds 26&27th October – Samhain Meditation (Live & Online) – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors

Friday 5th November 7.30-8.30pm – Online New moon beginners mind, health visualization & envisioning session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindful resilience, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, stress transformation

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Meditating with an energy ball (Drawing energy from the un-manifest)

Post author By Toby
Post date October 11, 2021

Dear integral Meditators,

If you can imagine that, level of consciousness itself there is basically a limitless reserve of energy. One question coming from this might then be “How can I tap into that level in order to experience more energy for myself on the mental and physical level?” The article below explores this question in a practical and experiential manner. If you enjoy it, the technique is one we will be using as part of this weeks Polarity meditation class.
Heads up for this weekends Breathwork Masterclass & Mini-Retreat– Improve physical immunity, wellbeing and inner peace though deep breathing. If you’ve been looking for a really consolidated set of breathing-for-health techniques, this is it!

My Life Coaching and Meditation coaching 3-6month packages are on a 15% offer up until Weds 20th October. If getting some coaching is an idea you have been contemplating, then this is a good opportunity to get it and save some money on the price.

In the spirit of energy,

Toby

Meditating with an energy ball (Drawing energy from the un-manifest)

In many schools of meditation, speaking in simple terms, we work with three levels of mind, consciousness and energy:

The gross physical and sensory
The subtle mental level
The very subtle level of consciousness itself

If you can imagine that, on the third level of consciousness itself there is basically a limitless reserve of energy. One question coming from this might then be “How can I tap into that level in order to experience more energy for myself on the mental and physical level?” The following meditation is one that I have been working with a long time, originally arising from the Qi gong practice that I have had since the 90’s. It’s extremely simple, just requiring a bit of focus and some familiarity. Also helpful is a playful, child-like approach to the visualization. It can be done sitting, standing or lying down.

The meditation
If you are doing this sitting upright, then you can place your hands in your lap, palms facing up, as if they were cupping a ball. You can make the ball football size, or smaller or bigger if you like according to preference. Football size is a good place to start.
Building the ball – Now you need to start to visualize a ball of light sitting in your hands. You can change it up later on, but if you start with just a simple white light, then that works well. Build the image and focus upon it, trying to ‘feel’ it as much as see it.
In the centre of the ball imagine there is a point of light. Imagine it is a point of light through which the energy of universal consciousness can flow out into this world. Imagine light and energy flowing out from this point of light and filling the ball, as if the point of light were a miniature sun.
Feel the ball of light gently pulsing with this energy, and radiate out up through the palms of your hand into your body. You can also feel it radiating out into your body directly through the surface facing your belly and legs. As it does this, you will feel it highlighting areas of your body where there may be energy blockages, heaviness, tension etc… Just let it work with your body’s energy in an organic manner, bringing balance, energy and renewal to your cellular structure.

That’s basically it! It’s a great exercise for

Practising mindfully building images and thought-form
Developing your awareness of subtle energy and how to work with it
Clearing you body of imbalanced energy, particularly anytime you feel that it is out of balance

I use this a lot after facilitating classes or if there has been a heavy day of coaching or socializing, just as a way of processing relatively easily and effortlessly the energy that has been passing though my body-mind in the course of the day’s interaction’s.
You can find a classical Qigong standing version here: Holding your buddha belly

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Last week article: Basic Deep breathing – How to & the benefits

The benefits
Basic deep breathing is a fundamental health and meditation practice, that provides many benefits, here is a little list just to get your appetite for the practice:
According to ancient Taoist view, the vital force provided by air through breathing is even more important to health and longevity than that provided by food and water through digestion. As most spiritual practitioners and meditators are aware, our breathing also links the activity of our consciousness with our body. Deep breathing is a way to…read full article

Stimulate and regulate your glands
Improve metabolism and sleep
Improve the condition of your heart and respiratory system
Promote vitality and open energy channels within your etheric body
From the mental and emotional levels, mastering one’s breathing promotes deeper relaxation, de-stresses ones over stimulated nervous system and gives much more increased mental clarity.
From the spiritual perspective, mastering one’s breathing provides a basis for developing deep concentration and a nurturing connection to one’s soul

The basic technique
Here are some basic pointers for good quality, basic deeper breathing. It may look a little complex when you first read it, but once you have tried it a few times you’ll see its quite easy.

Sitting or standing in an upright position, breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth, or in thru the nose out through the nose
Aim to breathe 5-10% deeper and longer, or 65-70% of your lung capacity
Make the length or inhalation and exhalation either roughly equal, or slightly longer on the exhalation
Start your inhalation by sending the air down to the bottom of your lungs, filling them from the bottom up. Notice movement of the belly when you do this.
Once you have a sense of the start, then focus on expanding the mid-lung/ribcage in the middle part of the inhalation, and notice the slight rising of the collar bone as you fill the clavicles, or top part of the lungs
Make the pace of the inhale and exhale smoothly and even
Option to contract the pelvic floor gently to about 30% of muscle strength during the inhalation, and at the top of the inbreath. Relax pelvic floor as you exhale.
Option to pause briefly at the top of the inbreath, and/or bottom of outbreath. Do not pause so long as you find yourself out of breath!
If you want to emphasize oxygenating the body and building energy, do the breathing a little more strongly. If you want to emphasize the breathing to calm your mind and move toward a meditative state, do it in a quieter, gentler manner.
You can start with short periods of time, such as 3 minutes a day, and build up to longer, though longer does not need to be more than 10mins at a time
You can breathe in ‘sets’ of say six breaths at a time, with short pauses in-between to relax and get a sense of the enjoyable effects of the practice.

Wishing you well in your breathing!

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Saturday October 16th & 23^rd – Breathwork Masterclass & Mini-Retreat– Improve physical immunity, wellbeing and inner peace though deep breathing

In a sentence: Learn unique Taoist breathing techniques to improve your immune system, energy level, psychological wellness and improve your meditation.

Overview: According to the ancient Chinese view, the vital force provided by air through breathing is even more important to health and longevity than that provided by food and water through digestion. The way in which we breathe is also a direct reflection of the levels of stress that we are feeling; when we feel calm our breathing becomes deep and regular, when we feel stress our breathing becomes shallower and quicker…read full details

Starts Monday October 25th – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

How can you move from coping to thriving in your life as a man?

Tues & Weds 26&27th October – Samhain Meditation (Live & Online) – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Begins Tues 14/Weds 15^th September – Integral Polarity Meditation – Exploring Earth, Lunar & ‘Vertical’ Polarities

Tues 19th & Weds 20th October – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday October 23^rd, 10am-4pm – Breathwork Masterclass & Mini-Retreat– Improve physical immunity, wellbeing and inner peace though deep breathing

Starts Monday October 25th – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Tues & Weds 26&27th October – Samhain Meditation (Live & Online) – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors

Friday 5th November 7.30-8.30pm – Online New moon beginners mind, health visualization & envisioning session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags energy meditation, integral meditation, integral mindfulness, mindfulness, stress transformation

Energy Meditation Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation techniques Presence and being present

Polarity meditation – Working consciously with tension

Post author By Toby
Post date September 6, 2021

“When opposing forces in our life start to complement and strengthen each other, then we start to become capable of levels of both personal performance and enjoyment that are well beyond the reach of most people”

Dear Integral Meditators,

Polarity meditation is a practice that I’ve been working with for many years. It’s principles are one of the bases of my Life-fullness- life coaching practice. Starting next week, I’ll be offering a brand new polarity meditation course. I’ve written an article on some of the basic concepts below, and you can also see a video intro that I have created here: A video intro to polarity meditation
I’ll be doing a special introductory session, live and online next Tuesday & Wednesday 14^th/15^th September.

In the spirit of harmony in polarity,

Toby

Polarity meditation – Working consciously with tension

Natural tension
Our lives are full of tension, naturally. Without this tension life would lack vitality and challenge. The tension in our life arises from the polarisation of opposite forces and energies. These forces demand that we find and hold a point of balance or tension between them. For example:

Our work life and family life
Our thinking and feeling
Between alone time and social time
Between who we are and who we want to be become
Between resting and exerting ourselves
Between what we want and what others want from us
Between being assertive and being patient

Tension leads to stress, but of what type?
All of this tension from polarity leads to stress in our life. However, stress can either be constructive or destabilizing:

Negative Stress is: Any form of stress that inhibits our ability to respond adequately, appropriately and successfully to the challenges of life, and to learn from such challenges
Positive stress, or Eu-stress is: Any form of stress that improves our ability to respond adequately, appropriately and successfully to the challenges of our life, and to learn from such challenges.

One of the main points of polarity meditation is to enable us to become aware of the tension arising from polarity in such a way that we are able to make what is currently negative stress in our life into positive, constructive stress. It aims to give us the confidence to feel that, whatever life throws at us we have the capability to put it to use in order to grow and thrive. Increasingly we find fewer and fewer situations that we find intimidating or negatively stressful

Working consciously with polarity leads to superpowers
If we can start to get the opposing forces in our life working together, then we discover that we create ‘inner super-powers’. These are the result of two polarities harmonizing and mutually strengthening each other, creating a result that could not happen with just one of these forces in isolation, for example:

By harmonizing the forces of our thinking and feeling together we create unusual psychological strength
By harmonizing our doing and being we create supernormal resilience and stamina
By harmonizing what we want and what others want from us, we develop great relationship skills

When opposing forces in our life start to complement and strengthen each other, then we start to become capable of levels of both personal performance and enjoyment that are well beyond the reach of most people.

Starting your practice
To get a sense of what polarity meditation and mindfulness look like, here are three points to consider to start working with the polarity of your thinking and feeling:

Observe way in which your current thinking and feeling interact.
Notice whether they are working like a team in harmony, or whether they seem to be in conflict much of the time
Experiment mindfully with one simple way that you can improve the balance between your thinking and feeling. For example, practice generating an enjoyable feeling or emotion that you are familiar with, and then looking at and thinking about your life on the basis of that good feeling.

Notice how in simple ways like this you can start to make the polarity of your thinking and feeling into a team that works together for you, rather than against you. Notice how you can create complementary tension and positive stress. Welcome to the world of polarity meditation!

Related article: The middle way

Watch Toby talking about Integral Polarity Meditation:

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Begins Tues 14/Weds 15^th September – Integral Polarity Meditation – Exploring Earth, Lunar & ‘Vertical’ Polarities

In a sentence: Learn how to integrate different aspects of yourself and your world into complementary polarities in order to increase your internal harmony, strength and wellbeing

Overview: Polarity meditation is a tradition of meditation that has its precedent in both eastern and western forms of meditation. In the east it is found in Taoist meditation with yin & yang, and in the west within the Tree of Life & Qabalah. In this series we will be focusing on polarities
Read full details…

Tues & Weds 21st & 22nd September – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation (Live & online)
The Autumn Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the warmer, lighter seasons of the year and the cooler, darker ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it is a great time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice….read full details

Saturday 25th September – Meditations for Transforming Negativity and Stress into Energy, Positivity and Enlightenment Masterclass & Mini-retreat
One sentence summary: Learn how to understand, re-direct and make use of stress, anxiety and difficult emotions through mindfulness and meditation
Overview: Stress, anxiety, fear, anger, attachment – Ordinarily we see these states of mind and emotion as negative; things that get in the way of our happiness and wellbeing, and prevent us from achieving the goals and quality of life that we would like.
But what if there was a way in which we could learn to work with these negative and difficult energies in such a way that we could transform and redirect them, making them sources of positive and empowering energy?…Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Starts 6th&7th July – Integral Meditation from the Perspective of Zen – A 10 week series

Starts Wednesday September 8th – The Integral Mindfulness & Meditation Online Program with Toby September ’21-March ’22

Tues 14/Weds 15^th September – Introduction to Integral Polarity Meditation – The Path of the Middle Way

Begins Tues 14/Weds 15^th September – Integral Polarity Meditation – Exploring Earth, Lunar & ‘Vertical’ Polarities

Tues & Weds 21st & 22nd September – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation (Live & online)

Saturday 25th September – Meditations for Transforming Negativity and Stress into Energy, Positivity and Enlightenment Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Tues & Weds 26&27th October – Samhain Meditation (Live & Online) – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags meditation, meditation in singapore, mindful living, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, polarity meditation, stress transformation

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Dealing with your anxiety more effectively (Identifying causal anxiety)

Post author By Toby
Post date March 9, 2020

“Working effectively with any type of anxiety means making friends as much as possible with the feeling of anxiety.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at a particular type of anxiety, and how we can start to work with it more effectively, enjoy!

In the spirit of acceptance,

Toby

Stress-Transformation coaching with Toby
Stress, anxiety, fear, pressure, anger, attachment – Ordinarily we see these states of mind and emotion as negative; things that get in the way of our happiness and well-being, and prevent us from achieving the goals and quality of life that we would like….full details

Dealing with your anxiety more effectively (Identifying causal anxiety)

In this article I am going to explain a method that gives you greater effectiveness in the face of your anxiety. It is in relation to what is called ‘causal anxiety’. Causal anxiety is anxiety is so named because, at least superficially, it has a clear, tangible cause that we can identify. For example:

I am feeling anxious regarding a test result that will come through shorty
I am nervous about a speech that I have to give in front of a group of people
I am worried about catching a disease that has been going around

Meeting Causal anxiety with either acceptance or pro-activity
So, with causal anxiety, the position is quite simple. We just ask the question “Am I going to be pro-active in dealing with the challenge I am worried about, or am I simply going to focus on accepting it as it is?” So for example:

With my test result, I may simply choose to accept that I’m just going to have to wait for it. There is nothing further I can do, so I make a clear decision to relax and accept that. Note here that this also means accepting the feeling of anxiety that I have, getting ‘comfortable with the discomfort of it’ so to speak. It is unlikely that I will be able to get rid of the feeling of anxiety totally, but in making peace with it and accepting it, I can diminish its disruptive power substantially.
Regarding the speech the I have to give, I can respond to the anxiety by choosing to prepare for another half hour, and then practice acceptance. At a certain point of my choosing, I have to make a decision that ‘I have now done enough’, and now can focusing on relaxing and accepting (or if possible releasing) the anxiety.
Regarding the disease, I can choose to take all sensible preventative measures; hand washing and so forth, and then just accept that there is some risk, knowing that I have done all that I can do!

So with causal anxiety, I am being clear about my choice to do or not do, and dealing with anxiety that way. As you can see from the examples, your response can be a combination of action and acceptance. The point is that the alleviation of anxiety comes from being clear about what you are going to do about the challenge, and then having done it then practicing letting go and acceptance.

Getting comfortable with the feeling of anxiety
A final point here; working effectively with any type of anxiety means making friends as much as possible with the feeling of anxiety. Whatever the cause, the more we can accept the felt sense of anxiety in the body, the more easily we will be able to work with it. If this feeling is our enemy and adversary, we are generally going to have a tough time with it. This is because, for tender humans like us, feeling a degree of anxiety is often synonymous with feeling alive.

Tuesday 10th, Wednesday 11th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

Bring energy and health to our physical body
Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goals

Full details of session

Restarts Monday March 23rd, 6.30-8pm – The Men’s group, the path of conscious manhoodHow can you move from coping to thriving in your life as a man? – Much is asked of men in their traditional roles as fathers and sons, partners and husbands, students and teachers, employees and employers. The men’s group is a professionally moderated and confidential forum for men. A forum is a safe place for exploring, learning and sharing the successful perspectives, skills, and strategies… Click here for full details

Saturday 14th March, 10.30am-12noon – Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation everIntegral Meditation Asia is happy to provide you with a truly practical and super short (90min) workshop that teaches you:

What meditation is and how it works
How to start your own effective daily meditation practice with just a five minute a day commitment

Full detail of session

Tues 17th & Weds 18th March – Spring Equinox balancing & renewing meditation

At the spring equinox we can think about the spring and summer periods that lie ahead of us, what our goals and expectations are, and sow the seeds on an inner level of the things that we wish to manifest over the next few months.
Full details of session

Saturday 28th March, 2-5.30pm – Meditations for Developing the Language of Your Shadow Self WorkshopBy working with these shadow characters in meditation you will develop the capacity to:

Developing a fuller and more intimate understanding of the language that your own shadow self uses to communicate with you
Understand different aspects of your shadow self as it relates to different time periods in your life (childhood, puberty, early adulthood etc…)
Finding and articulating your shadow as it relates to different areas of our life, for example your relationships, work life, spiritual life and so on.

Full details of session

All upcoming classes and workshops for January 2020

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Tuesday 10th, Wednesday 11th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 14th March, 10.30am-12noon – Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation ever

Tues 17th & Weds 18th March – Spring Equinox balancing & renewing meditation

Restarts Monday March 23rd, 6.30-8pm – The Men’s group, the path of conscious manhood

Saturday 28th March, 2-5.30pm – Meditations for Developing the Language of Your Shadow Self Workshop

Friday, Sat, Sunday 17,18,19th April – The Qi Gong Foundation Program & Program for coaches and trainers

Starts Saturday 25th April – The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors and Therapists – Creating sustainable high performance and deep wellness

Ongoing – The Integral Mindfulness & Meditation Online Program, January-July 2020

Integral Meditation AsiaOnline Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags dealing with anxiety, integral meditation, integral mindfulness, overcoming anxiety, stress transformation

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Allowing & Participating – Rethinking ‘being in control’

Post author By Toby
Post date December 2, 2019

“By mindfully combining allowing and participating we can control things better, without feeling the need to be so ‘in control”
M

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article offers a couple of practical thoughts on how to re-frame our idea of being in control in a way that means less stress and more effectiveness. This weeks Wednesday meditation class will be focusing on how to work with these ideas!

In the spirit of participation,

Toby

Allowing & Participating – Rethinking ‘being in control’

I’ve recently been experiencing a time in my life where there are so many factors undergoing change that inevitably anxiety keeps coming up. When change occurs, especially deep and radical change, the part of us that wants to feel ´in control’ inevitably feels stressed because the situation feels ´out of control’.
I did a session with a client about the same topic. She was fighting with a similar feeling of trying to be ‘in control’ whilst feeling so many factors ‘out of control’. One of the ways in which we reframed our situation was to use the polarity of ‘accepting and participating’ rather than ‘in control or out of control’.
In control and out of control is a win-lose game; to control is to win, to be out of control is to loose. With allowing and participating:

We allow things to be uncertain, unfixed, to an extent beyond our control. By accepting we relax more comfortably into the situation we find ourself without unnecessary struggle
By participating, we look for ways to dance with and influence the situation in creative and constructive ways. Without trying to fix everything at once, we enjoy engaging and participating with our life each day through action that is as intelligent and playful as we are able.

When we practice allowing and participating, we can create a win-win experience: We can relax with things we can’t totally control, while staying active and engaged.
By mindfully combining allowing and participating we can control things better, without feeling the need to be so ‘in control’.

Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Tues 10th & Weds 11th December – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 14^th & 15th December, 2-5.30pm – The Mindful Heart Meditation Workshop

Tuesday and Wednesday 17,18 December – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation in singapore, mindfulness meditation, stress transformation

A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Breathing Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Stress Transformation

Sinking your centre of gravity

Post author By Toby
Post date November 22, 2019

“If you observe your body during the day, you may notice is that, if there are a number of things that trigger your stress levels in succession, then your centre of gravity rises higher. If you consciously lower your centre of gravity, this can help build greater resilience to that stress.”
U

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores somatic awareness and how it can help you deal better with stress. Enjoy!

In the spirit of balance,

Toby

Bringing your centre of gravity down

If you observe your body during the day, you may notice is that, if there are a number of things that trigger your stress levels in succession, then your centre of gravity rises higher.
For example, if during breakfast you are reminded of a project at work that is stuck, that thought causes your centre to rise a bit from your lower belly up into your stomach.
Then your partner reminds you that you haven’t started to organise for the party on the weekend, so your centre rises up into your chest. This is accompanied by shallower breathing, from the mid and upper lungs, you are no longer using the lower lung.
Then you go to work and 3-4 people are trying to get your attention. You can’t settle into a task, and even more stress is triggered. By now your stress levels are forcing your energy into your upper chest and shoulders. Your shoulders rise towards your ears, you are breathing from the top of your lungs, and your getting brain cramp behind your eyes as you try and ‘think’ your way out of all the uncomfortable feelings you are having!

Sinking your centre of gravity
One simple way to reduce your stress level then is to simply notice when your centre of gravity rises in your body, and spend a few moments bringing it down. here is one simple method that you can use:

Notice the height of your centre of gravity in your torso. For example, it may be in your upper chest or clavicles. Place your hand/palm on that level, and breathe, being aware of it.
Then place your hand mid-way between your current centre of gravity, and your lower belly area. As you breathe the next few breaths, ‘sink’ your centre of gravity down to this level, taking slightly deeper breaths than usual.
Now place your hand over your lower belly area, just beneath the belly button. Over the next few breaths sink your centre of gravity down from your mid-level down into the belly. This makes your centre of gravity low, with your upper body relaxed. Feel your torso becoming ‘broad’ at the base (hips and belly) and ’narrow’ at the top (head and shoulders), like a mountain or pyramid.

Keeping your centre of gravity low in your body like this helps to release stress as it arises, and decompress stress that has been building up over time. Try doing the exercise three times a day, for just a minute each time, and observe the effect that it has on you.