Category: Presence and being present

Rats, meadows, & the World doing Itself (Stress tolerance & transformation)

Post author By Toby
Post date May 4, 2026

“I am the Wolrd doing Itself”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article offers three of my favourite perceptual shifts to help you manage & expand into the stress of your life challenges.

If you enjoy the article, & would like to shift your own ability to transform your stress tangibly, then do check out my Meditations for Transforming Negativity and Stress into Energy, Positivity and Enlightenment Workshop on Saturday 16^th & 23^rd of May.

Also the Wednesday & Saturday Inner smile meditations are also focused on energy and emotional stress transformation, you might enjoy these as well!

In the spirit of transformation,

Toby

Rats, meadows, & the World doing Itself (Stress tolerance & transformation)

Undergoing an expansion of capacity more gently

These last few weeks I have been going through a bit of a life change. I’ve felt an urge to take on a few new projects, and the combination of them, in tandem with my existing commitments has left me feeling somewhat dis-oriented and overwhelmed. The interesting thing about the overwhelm in this case is that I don’t feel ‘overwhelmed by the overwhelm’. What I mean by this is that, previously in a similar situation I would be incapacitated by the overwhelm, and then have to cut back on what I am doing in order to get back into balance. In this situation however, I feel more like what I am doing is something that I can do, and I just need to figure out how to relax into it, and my capacity will expand to the size of the challenge.

How to meditate when your mind is too busy, and you feel overwhelmed

I did a coaching session with a client last week, where he had been facing a similar challenge to me; too many things going on on all fronts. As he sat down to meditate, his mind just would not settle; things he had to do kept jumping into his mind. He was sometimes left feeling that he may as well have not meditated!

The positions we explored to help make his meditation time more productive were:

Noticing – That when we feel over-busy, our field of awareness can feel small, like we are stuck in our head. In our head are a bunch of ‘rats in a bag’ all bumping into each other and creating claustrophobia and friction.
Expanding – I suggested that, rather than trying to control his thoughts in this ‘small-mind’ environment, he could try making his awareness big. I mentioned the Zen expression ‘If you want to control your cow or your sheep, put it in a big meadow. To quote from a previous article on the subject: “When sitting with the thoughts in your mind, rather than trying to control them, stop them or ‘fix’ them, you simply make your mind and awareness bigger, like a large open meadow …. In such an environment an animal will tend to simply wonder off, find its place in the field and be content. So, when you make your awareness big, you can sit there watching the thoughts without being so bothered by them, and they in turn tend to gradually return to equilibrium, without you having to work that hard to control or fix them.”
I am the Word doing Itself – In addition to making our mind ‘big’ in this way, I suggested a non-dual perceptual shift. Rather than seeing himself as in the world, struggling to make his way amongst all of the busyness and activity, he should see himself as the ‘World doing Itself’. This perceptual shift means expanding your sense of your body-mind to be the Whole World, way beyond just your small body and individual life. Everything around you is you, you are the World, and the World is doing itself.

This third position keeps your awareness big, and all your little struggles feel correspondingly much more manageable. Because everything feels less stressful and more manageable, dealing with challenges in your life, on multiple-levels becomes much more manageable. We discover that we can take on more, whilst using less energy, and as a result we find our overall capacity increases.

My client liked these three positions, and we did a meditation on them before concluding. Of course, these three positions are equally useful for me in my life, as I expand into the next chapter and explore the limits of my own capacity!

Related reading: A bag of rats & a big meadow (tactics or strategy?)
The world as an organism
Four Mindful Images for Stress Transformation

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

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Ongoing on Wednesdays – The inner smile – Meditations for inner regeneration & connecting to the Earth – An 8-week course

Ongoing on Saturdays – The inner smile & Earth healing deep-dive – An 8 session practice series

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Tags inner growth, integral meditation, integral meditation asia, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, power of mind, stress transformation

A Mind of Ease Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Breathing Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Stress Transformation Using the Energy of Negative Emotions

How to stop difficult feelings becoming negative emotions

Post author By Toby
Post date April 28, 2026

“Can you distinguish your feelings from your emotions? Oftentimes this skill can help you navigate stressful situations more successfully, & with less effort!”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article looks at how to distinguish feeling states from emotional states, & use it to navigate difficult circumstances more easily. If you enjoy it, then I invite you to my Mindfulness for emotional intelligence masterclass this Saturday 25th April, 2.30-4.30pm, live or online!

This week’s Wednesday & Saturday class continue our inner-smile meditation series, which is also focused on mindfulness around emotions. All welcome.

In the spirit of ease,

Toby

How to stop difficult feelings becoming negative emotions

The difference between feelings and emotions

One of the most useful distinctions in Buddhist insight meditation that I have found is the distinction between feelings and emotions. Broadly speaking feelings are simply the experience of that which is pleasant, unpleasant or neutral. By contrast emotions arise from a psychological process that involves thinking in a particular way about a feeling. Here are two simple examples:

I see a person who has wronged me in the past, instinctively an unpleasant feeling arises. I then start to reflect on the harm that they have caused me and develop anger or anger. This anger is the emotion, arising from the psychological process of paying attention to the harm done in combination with the initial unpleasant feelings.
I am sick, giving rise to unpleasant feelings in my body. I start to think about how this sickness is ruining my only two weeks of holiday in the year and I start to develop the emotions of frustration, despair and sadness.

Here we can start to see the basic distinction; pain is simply the feeling arising within the moment. We experience emotion when we combine a feeling with a psychological process of focusing on the feeling in a particular way.
With regard to painful feelings, often we compound the pain they cause us by focusing on them in a way that causes us to experience emotional suffering, as in the examples above. The key therefore in preventing painful feelings becoming full blown emotional suffering is to avoid thinking about them or focusing on them in such a way that negative emotions are stimulated.

Some sources of painful feelings

The five sources of painful feelings below are a non-exhaustive list, but it gives an idea of the variety of different sources that can cause painful feelings within us. Any of them if focused on in the wrong way can cause negative emotions to arise:

Physical pain arising from sickness or injury
Pain or irritability arising from hormonal or other biological or energetic imbalances within the body
From people who say or do harmful things to us or have done so in the past
From psychological and/or existential anxiety, e.g.: Worried about not being good enough, fear of dying, fear of stepping out of comfort zone etc…
From spiritual crisis; for example, when the old self or ego structures are collapsing in order for a new level of self-sense to arise.

An insight meditation for acknowledging and releasing negative feelings

Here is a brief insight meditation form that we can use to prevent difficult feelings turning into negative emotions:

Stage 1: Breathing in I am aware of my painful feelings,
Breathing out I acknowledge those feelings fully.
Stage 2: Breathing in I experience my tight grasping at those painful feelings,
Breathing out I relax my grasping at those feelings,
Stage 3: Breathing in I detach from those feelings,
Breathing out I extend compassion and understanding to those feelings.

In stage one as we breathe in, we become consciously aware of any painful feelings we may be experiencing, as we breathe out, we acknowledge them fully. Often, we try and repress or deny negative feelings, which in turn allow them to build and transform into negative emotions. Fully acknowledging what is there and gives feelings the attention they need in order to be addressed.

In stage two we observe how we are clinging to these painful feelings, grasping at them tightly. Then, as we breathe out, we consciously release that tight grasping, energetically relaxing our body and mind.

In stage three we detach from those painful feelings, at the same time as extending a feeling of compassion and understanding toward them. We combine the objective experience of detachment with the positive emotional tonalities of compassion and understanding.

Suggestions for Daily Practice

The essential point is that feelings can be distinguished from emotions, and we can prevent negative emotions from arising by avoiding focusing on painful feelings in the wrong way.
The brief meditation technique I describe above can be done as a two-minute exercise or as an extended meditation, taking a few minutes to focus on each of the stages. It is a meditation that is worth doing sometimes even if we are not fully aware of any negative feelings inside us, as often it will bring to light feelings within us the need a bit of tender loving care.
Of course if there are also practical things that we can do to alleviate the negative feelings, like taking medicine, or having a conversation to clear the air with our partner about a hurt we have then this should be done to!

Related reading: “Insight Meditation – Improving Your Subjective Experience by Developing Your Objective Perspective”

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Ongoing on Wednesdays – The inner smile – Meditations for inner regeneration & connecting to the Earth – An 8-week course

Ongoing on Saturdays – The inner smile & Earth healing deep-dive – An 8 session practice series

Saturday 25th April, 2.30-4.30pm – Mindfulness for emotional intelligence masterclass

Tags inner growth, integral meditation, integral meditation asia, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, power of mind

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Are you building self-esteem or self-alienation?

Post author By Toby
Post date April 13, 2026

“What are the areas of your life that you tend to get stuck in self-alienation? How can you start using self-acceptance in these situations, strengthening your self-esteem in the process?”

Dear Integral Meditators,

In this week’s article I look at self-alienation as an object of mindful enquiry. In my view self-alienation is a common, pervasive issue for many people. If we can start to see it, we can start to deal with it! It is a topic that comes up with regularity in both my shadow coaching work, and my therpeutic mindfulness coaching.

If the subject interests you, then you might enjoy the Mindfulness for emotional intelligence masterclass on Saturday 25th April, 2.30-4.30pm.

In the spirit of integration,

Toby

Are you building self-esteem or self-alienation?

Self-esteem is

One way of thinking about self esteem is as having two parts:

The part that considers ourself to be worthy of happiness and to have value
The part of us that feels capable and effective in the face of life and life’s challenges

If you have self-esteem as a foundational building block of your psychological experience of life, it will affect almost everything else in a positive way.

Self-alienation is

Self-Alienation happens whenever we turn away from, reject, or repress awareness of an aspect of ourself. We literally cut ourselves off from a part of who we are, and this part becomes a stranger to, or alienated from our conscious self. Nathaniel Branden wrote a book ‘The disowned self’ on the subject of all the different ways in which we alienate ourself from ourself. It mostly does not happen consciously, very few people wake up saying to themselves “Today I am going to practice self-alienation, and dis-own different parts of myself.” Nevertheless, without knowing it many of us do exactly this, without understanding that it is happening, or how we are doing it.

Why & how we create self-alienation when trying to create self-esteem

Let’s say I am deeply disappointed about not getting a job opportunity that I had interviewed for and had a good chance of getting. To protect myself from the difficult feelings and ‘lowness’ of feeling disappointed (and like a ‘loser’) I repress them, banishing them from my consciousness. By doing this I am trying to protect my self-esteem, but what I am really doing is alienating myself from the part of me that feels disappointed. This ‘disappointed self’ is the very part of me needing support and acknowledgement in that moment. Instead, I turn away from him and disown him.
In this example my instinctive efforts to protect my self-esteem actually sabotage it, and make me weaker by cutting myself off from a part of me. Secondarily, and just as importantly, sub-consciously a part of me will know that I have done this, and will know that we have ‘betrayed ourself’ on some fundamental level. This further lowers our REAL self-esteem, but tragically it has been done to protect the very self-esteem that we are damaging.

Self-acceptance as a route to genuine self-esteem

Let us say that, in the face of my disappointment over the job opportunity, instead of repressing and alienating my disappointment I turn towards it, acknowledging and accepting it. I allow myself to feel and experience my emotions, expressing a degree of understanding and care toward the part of me in pain. By bringing into consciousness the wounded part, and choosing to accept and look after it I:

Increase my self-esteem by displaying both courage and competency in the face of a challenge
I keep my personality from being divided against itself, it remains interconnected and in integrity
I actually pass through the disappointment much more quickly, feeling much more resilient and adaptable as a result

Self-acceptance becomes a route to higher self-confidence and self-esteem, preventing the disastrous (and often unconscious) results of self-alienation and dis-association.

What are the areas of your life that you tend to get stuck in self-alienation? How can you start using self-acceptance in these situations, strengthening your self-esteem in the process?

Related reading: Choosing to be on Your Own Side
Motivating Yourself to Meditate Part 2 – Meeting Your Deeper & Higher Needs Through Meditation

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Ongoing on Wednesdays – The inner smile – Meditations for inner regeneration & connecting to the Earth – An 8-week course

Ongoing on Saturdays – The inner smile & Earth healing deep-dive – An 8 session practice series

Saturday 25th April, 2.30-4.30pm – Mindfulness for emotional intelligence masterclass

Tags inner growth, integral meditation, integral meditation asia, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, power of mind, self-alienation, self-esteem

A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Inner smile & Earth healing Inner vision Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Presence and being present Using the Energy of Negative Emotions

Mindfulness, emotions & your MRVA’s (Mass rapid value assessments)

Post author By Toby
Post date April 6, 2026

“If we can allow ourselves to skilfully acknowledge & experience difficult emotions, there is a corresponding release of a range of positive, enjoyable emotions.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article focuses on emotions & how you work with them as a major lynch-pin of your energetic resilience. Its something that we will be exploring in depth in the new Wednesday and Saturday meditation series on building confidence & resilience with the inner-smile practice.

In the spirit of integration,

Toby

Mindfulness, emotions & your MRVA’s (Mass rapid value assessments)

In my upcoming meditation series on building confidence and energetic resilience in life, we will be focusing on developing a range of mindful skills, including:

Healing and regenerating the energy of your physical body and internal organs
Revitalise and transform your emotional vitality
Build a warm, empowered & confident relationship to your life

To really get these skills to work effectively, we need to understand the energy of emotions, their power, and how to get them to flow healthily within us. Emotions are psych-somatic, partaking of both our bodily and mental energy. A good relationship to emotions opens our life-force and joie de vivre tremendously. A blocked or combattative relationship to our emotions tends to constrict our life-force, limiting our energy in life no matter how hard we try. Here is a working definition of emotion from Nathaniel Branden, for the purposes of this article

“An emotion is a value-response. It is an automatic psychological result (involving mental and somatic features) of a super-rapid subconscious appraisal. Emotions are psychosomatic embodiments of value judgments…Since emotions are the product of complex integrations of ideas beliefs and experiences, they cannot be commanded out of existence, neither by and act of will or by repression. It is a disastrous error to imagine that an emotion – merely because it is judged undesirable – can be repressed or dismissed with impunity.” *

Emotions happen very quickly then, as our body-mind engages in many ‘Mass rapid value assessments’ (MRVA’s). Once an emotion has been stimulated, it IS, whether we like it or not. So how should we approach it. To quote Branden again:

“If we acknowledge and permit ourselves to experience our painful or undesired feelings, without self-pity, and without self-condemnation, we facilitate the process of healing integration.” *

If we can allow ourselves to skilfully acknowledge and experience difficult emotions, a corollary benefit will be the release of a whole range of positive, enjoyable emotions.

How to acknowledge and experience emotions

A simple way to begin is to sit down, sense into yourself and simply describe the emotions you are feeling. You can either do this organically with whatever is there in the moment, or with regard to a particular emotion you are struggling with. As you do this you will notice there are both bodily and mental aspects to it. My go-to practice for years now has been something called sentence completion. You create a sentence stem, and then complete it, either writing or verbally around ten times, in whatever way occurs to you, as quickly and non-judgmentally as you can.

Here is an example around depression:
If I allow myself to experience and acknowledge the feeling I am calling depression within me –

I feel like there is a huge weight on my shoulders
My eyes stare from hollow sockets
My mouth hangs open like a zombie
I want to sleep for a thousand years
I feel overwhelmed by all the things I have to do
I resent others for leaving me with all the responsibility
I feel confused about what to do next
The world feels like an insurmountable mountain
I can feel myself more present in my body now, landing and feeling stronger
I feel a release and renewed enthusiasm and I move through it

Here you can see that, by the end of the sentence completion I’m already kind of pulling out of the difficult emotion, and moving toward something better. Better still, I have processed the emotion and an now move on from it into the next part of the day in freedom.
All this can sound a bit too good to be true until you actually try it, but once you get the hang of it all sorts of possibilities start to open up!

* Quote: Nat Branden, from ‘the Disowned Self’, chapter on the undiscovered self (Page 27 & 33)

Related reading: Mindfulness around emotions
Accepting & recycling your difficult emotions
Connecting to higher, deeper emotions (Enjoying emotional resilience)

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Starts Wednesday 8^th April, 7.30-8.30pm, & then ongoing – The inner smile – Meditations for inner regeneration & connecting to the Earth – An 8-week course

Saturday 11^th April, 5.30-6.15pm SG time, & then ongoing – The inner smile & Earth healing deep-dive – An 8 session practice series

Tags emotional mindfulness, inner growth, integral meditation, integral meditation asia, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, power of mind

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Which type of meditator are you? ( & muddy water article)

Post author By Toby
Post date March 30, 2026

“’Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone’. The tricky thing is that with a busy mind, where there is conflicting or competing energies, this is often the last thing that we feel like doing!”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week I’ll be doing a couple of open talks and meditations on the five types of meditators:

Wednesday 1^st April is online only
Saturday 4^th April is Live in person & online

Details and links are below. If you are not able to make the sessions live, but want to have a listen, let me know & I’ll be happy to send the recordings on…

Beneath the session details you can find this weeks artcle on ‘Muddy water – Meditation as waiting, allowing’.

In the spirit of integral meditation,

Toby

Wednesday April 1^st, 7.30-8.30pm & Saturday, 4^th April, 5-6pm – Which meditator are you? – Free meditation seminars: The five types of meditators & how to build your path to inner freedom

Read full details…

This week’s article: Muddy water – Meditation as waiting & allowing

Back when I was teaching meditation classes as a monk, we used to use the analogy of muddy water to explain meditation. It is quite well known, and you may have heard of it yourself. It basically says that a busy mind is like muddy water; if you leave it to stand for long enough, the mud will settle and the water becomes clear. There are a couple of ‘sources’ for this analogy:

1. In chapter 15 of the Tao te ching, Lao Tsu refers to it:
“Clear as a glass of water.
Do you have the patience to wait
till your mud settles and the water is clear?”

2. It can also be found in the Buddhist sutras, specifically the Surangama sutra, where it says:
“It (meditation) is like purifying muddy water by placing it in a quiet vessel which is kept completely still and unmoving. The sand and silt settle, and the pure water appears. This is called the initial subduing of the guest-dust affliction.”

3. More recently Alan watts refers to it in his teachings in ‘the way of Zen’, where he says “Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone”

The main thing I want to emphasize here is that clarity is achieved through leaving alone and waiting. It is very difficult for us to try to clear our mind in meditation, but the effort itself prevents us from letting the ‘mud’ of our mind settle, and achieve clarity. The clarity is ‘achieved’ essentially by:

Waiting
Watching
Letting alone
Being patient
Doing precisely nothing, the less the better!

So then, you could consider it a perfectly valid meditation practice just to sit down and wait. The key here would be to do nothing else; just sit, wait, relax. The tricky thing is that with a busy mind, where there is conflicting or competing energies, this is often the last thing that we feel like doing! We want to:

Get rid of the conflict
‘Achieve’ clarity
Escape from, not have to face, what is within us
Get it done quickly

All of this makes it quite difficult to do nothing other than wait, watch and allow.

Mastering, or at least getting better at this waiting process in meditation then starts to bleed into our daily life. Where we start to see that we can achieve several things much more easily by waiting and non-doing, rather than striving and getting busy. We start to access the art of Wu-wei, or doing-by-non-doing. This is a way of getting things done that is complementary, not contradictory to our striving and achieving approach. Indeed, it can make our striving and achieving more skilful and relaxed when we realize we don’t have to try quite as hard as we thought. Rather it is a matter of trying smarter rather than trying harder…

Related article: Effortless effort – Making everything workable
Relaxing into, not fighting with your fatigue

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Ongoing weekly on Wednesday – Beginners mind, resilient body – a 10-week integral meditation course

Wednesday April 1^st, 7.30-8.30pm & Saturday, 4^th April, 5-6pm – Which meditator are you? – Free meditation seminars: The five types of meditators & how to build your path to inner freedom

Starts Wednesday 8^th April, 7.30-8.30pm, & then ongoing – The inner smile – Meditations for inner regeneration & connecting to the Earth – An 8-week course

Saturday 11^th April, 5.30-6.15pm SG time, & then ongoing – The inner smile & Earth healing deep-dive – An 8 session practice series

Saturday 11^th April, 5.30-6.15pm SG time, & then ongoing – The inner smile & Earth healing deep-dive – An 8 session practice series

Tags inner growth, integral meditation, integral meditation asia, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, power of mind

Energy Meditation Inner smile & Earth healing Inner vision Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Stress Transformation

Mindful of – colour therapy & facial expression

Post author By Toby
Post date March 23, 2026

“Awareness of colour & facial expression are two ways of using mindful attention to improve your mood and energy with very little effort. You just need to remember them & return to them often”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article focuses on working with colour & facial expression, both powerful, enjoyable methods for enhancing mood & energy.

If you enjoy it, then do have a look at this Saturdays workshop, that looks at this subject in depth:
Saturday, March 28^th 9:00am – 12:30pm – Inner smile & Earth Healing meditation workshop – Build health, confidence & energetic resilience in life, as well as the class & deep-dive series following on from it.

In the spirit of living-in-colour,

Toby

Mindful of – colour therapy & facial expression

The two ‘mindful positions’ that we explore in this article are:

The energetics of colour, and tuning into the colour you need right now
The expression on your face, and working with what it is communicating

What colour does my body need?

If you have ever drawn or painted with colours, you might have noticed that concentrating on colour can feel great. After an hour of working with a green, blue and yellow landscape picture, you can really feel how these colours make you feel relaxed, calm and energised, even if you aren’t a great artist.
Similarly, if you go outside and just notice the colours in the landscape around you, you will notice that certain colours feel great to just stare at, absorb the energy of and relax.
On a slightly deeper level, if you ask yourself the question what coulor does my body energy need right now to move toward balance? Quite quickly you will notice your body intelligence will suggest a colour to surround yourself with.

If it needs energy it may move toward oranges or reds
If it needs lifting, it might move towards yellows
If it needs balancing and harmonizing, it might move toward greens
For calmness blues, and so on…

You can then just imagine yourself surrounded by that colour and let your body-mind absorb it, with often rapid effect. You might feel also that the colour has a ‘sound’ or vibration, which you can enjoy too.

Variation: You can imagine a point of energy in your belly, heart, and head. Ask each of these areas of your body what colour it needs. Breathe each of these colours into the particular area of the body, building that colour vibration there. You will get to know what colours work for you powerfully very quickly if you do this.

Your facial expression

The expression on your face communicates how you are feeling, but often we are unaware of it. If you are on a commute, and look at people’s faces, you will see this quite clearly!
If you become aware of your face, and notice tension, stress or a bad mood there, here are three stages you can try:

Notice the expression and the mood it embodies. Accept it, even exaggerate the expression a little to really get a feeling for what is there
Next, relax your face, release the expression, move your face toward a calm, neutral position, enjoy it
Third, raise the corners of your mouth a little, so that your face is in the position of a half-smile. Feel the gentle joy and radiance of this expression, let it spread from your face into your body, and any parts of your body-mind that might need a bit of warmth and support.

There you go, two ways of playing with your attention to improve your mood and energy with very little effort. It’s just something that you need to come back to often and put to use!

Related reading: Mindfulness, beauty & slowing the effects of ageing
Your Emotional Colour Palette
Practical dimensions of chakra meditation
Inner smile meditation
What your body posture communicates to you

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Ongoing weekly on Wednesday – Beginners mind, resilient body – a 10-week integral meditation course

Starts Saturday 17^th January, 5.30-6.15pm, & then weekly – Beginners mind, resilient body deep-dive: An 11 -session practice series

Saturday, March 28^th 9:00am – 12:30pm – Inner smile & Earth Healing meditation workshop – Build health, confidence & energetic resilience in life

Wednesday April 1^st, 7.30-8.30pm & Saturday, 4^th April, 5-6pm – Which meditator are you? – Free meditation seminars: The five types of meditators & how to build your path to inner freedom

Starts Wednesday 8^th April, 7.30-8.30pm, & then ongoing – The inner smile – Meditations for inner regeneration & connecting to the Earth – An 8-week course

Saturday 11^th April, 5.30-6.15pm SG time, & then ongoing – The inner smile & Earth healing deep-dive – An 8 session practice series

Tags inner smile

A Mind of Ease Beginners mind, resilient body Energy Meditation Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Stress Transformation Using the Energy of Negative Emotions

Tired of being tired – Relaxing into, not fighting with your fatigue

Post author By Toby
Post date March 3, 2026

“Relax into fatigue, work WITH your body, rather than fighting with it to complete the task when you are tired”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article looks at how to work with fatigue & stress, rather than against it. If you want to get more done with less effort, this practice can be quite transformative!

Heads up for the Saturday, March 28^th 9:00am – 12:30pm – Inner smile & energy balls meditation workshop – Build health, confidence & energetic resilience in life, which is very much focused on re-calibrating our energy-fatigue dynamic…

In the spirit of acceptance,

Toby

Tired of being tired – Relaxing into, not fighting with your fatigue

Tired of being tired

When we are tired, often without realizing it we can find ourself fighting with the fatigue. The sensation of fatigue, particularly when we are stressed is uncomfortable, dulling, even actively painful. Consequently, we unconsciously react to the pain by:

Repressing it
Pushing it out of our awareness
Taking our mind away or ‘out’ of our body to avoid the discomfort
Seeking distractions, something to take our attention away from being tired

As a short-term coping mechanism, this can work for a while, but as a method it is very inefficient because:

We must expend effort avoiding the fatigue, and we are tired already
It sets up an antagonistic relationship between ‘me’ and the fatigue. I am fighting it rather than working with it
We start to dis-connect from our body, and the mainly legitimate signals that it is giving us about our energy level and what we are experiencing

If we persist with this approach, then the medium to long term effect is that I become ‘tired of being tired.’ What this means is not only am I literally tired for the first reasons that my body is signalling to me, but I am also tired of having to always fight, avoid and repress my feelings of being tired!

Accepting fatigue

The first step towards a more ergonomic and compassionate way to deal with our fatigue is to get in touch with and accept our fatigue. If we are a fatigue repressor, then this can feel pretty counter-intuitive at first, but it releases the potential for a whole new dynamic. As you are reading, get in touch with your body, and the feelings of fatigue or stress in it.

Notice your resistance to it initially, or your antagonism
Try and relax yourself and your body a little. In particular, soften the area of your body that contains the pain of the fatigue
Breathe in and out of the area, breathing in extend a bit of warmth and compassion to this body part, as you breathe out, encourage it to release the fatigue so that fresh energy can come into the body-tissues

If you build competency at doing this, then temporarily the pain will lessen, and you will feel a bit more energy. If you need to keep on working or doing whatever you are doing, then you do it in a more relaxed way, working WITH your body, rather than fighting with it to complete the task. Working with the body and its fatigue means:

You are no longer losing energy resisting and fighting your fatigue
You and your body-mind become a much more singular energy that can move forward with purpose
Your body responds to your encouragement and acceptance with energy, so it helps you because you help it(!)

When you need to rest, rest!

When we fight with our fatigue, this can de-sensitize ourself to it so that sometimes/often we fail to respond in the most obvious way, which is to build in time for more rest. Instead, we just keep pushing on, we procrastinate, we ignore the signals until we are in a state of different degrees of burn out or over-fatigue. This then takes much longer to recover from that plain old tiredness.

Practice points

Notice your resistance to fatigue
Practice relaxing into and working with your body and feelings of fatigue
Notice the greater enjoyment and efficiency of working with, not fighting your tiredness
Be decisive around rest

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Tags inner growth, integral meditation, integral meditation asia, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, power of mind, resilience

Beginners mind, resilient body creative imagery Energy Meditation Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present

Accepting & recycling your difficult emotions

Post author By Toby
Post date February 23, 2026

“The quickest way to get to where you want to go is often to accept where you are.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article looks at mindfulness around emotions, and working with emotional energy. If you enjoy it, we will be exploring these methods in both the weekday (Weds eve) and Saturday sessions this week. You are invited!

You might also consider the Inner smile & energy balls meditation workshop – Build health, confidence & energetic resilience in life.

Final call for this weekends Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels & for Self-Healing!

In the spirit of inner recycling,

Toby

Accepting & recycling your difficult emotions

In last week’s article on ‘Your emotions as horses’ I led with this quote:

“The emotions you currently think of as being the most useless in your life might just be the ones that you need to learn to ride better”

In this piece, I want to explore the theme of accepting and recycling difficult emotions, as well as the mental narrative and the bodily/somatic states that goes with them.

To recycle the energy of difficult emotions, they first need to be acknowledged and accepted. There is a Zen saying that goes “Pulling the weeds we give nourishment to the plant,” meaning that we can learn to be grateful to our inner difficulties, if we know how to use their energy, like pulling and then burying weeds next to a plant so that they can nourish it.

Our ‘normal’ approach to a difficult emotional state is to try and push it away, so that we can replaced it with a more ‘positive’ state. Another quote I often use in my trainings is:

“The quickest way to get to where you want to go is to accept where you are.”

What this points to is that, counter-intuitively, if you can accept and be at peace with a difficult emotional state, the state itself can change more rapidly to something more constructive. It is the accepting and not resisting that enables the transformation.

For example, if I am hurt or disappointed by someone’s behaviour, acknowledging that feeling of hurt or disappointment is a first step towards transforming it.

Smiling at it to accept and soften the energy

From acknowledgment I can then move onto acceptance. Even though we may understand intellectually the principle and benefit of accepting, it is not easy to do! The gateway to accepting a difficult emotion is often guarded by resistance. One technique I find helpful when in a state of resistance is to gently smile at my resistance, inviting it to soften its hard, rigid stance. Smiling and inviting our resistance to let go (and not being in a hurry about this) enables us to access the feeling of the emotion itself. Once we have this access, we can then use the smiling technique to work with the emotion. In my example of hurt and disappointment, I can smile inwardly to the part of me that feels this way, encouraging a softening of the emotion, making its energy more malleable. This opens up the emotional energy to the ‘recycling’ or transformational stage of the practice that I explain below.

Recycling emotional energy using the microcosmic orbit

I have talked about the microcosmic orbit in a previous articles this year. With emotional energy we raise its vibration by looping it up the back of the body, and re-directing it down the front, which is the basic pattern in all M-O meditations.

Imagine two points of light within your body, one at the bottom of your perineum, the second at the crown of your head. Now imagine a golden thread running up the back of your body, from perineum to the base of the spine, up the back of the body to the crown. It continues thru the crown to your third eye, and down the front of your body, through the belly and back down to the perineum (see diagram).

As you breathe in, feel the energy in your body flowing up the back of the golden thread to your crown, raising and purifying the vibration of the energy as it does so. As you breathe out, feel energy flowing down the front of the body, bringing the higher vibrational energy back down into the torso. As you do this, imagine that the energy of your difficult emotion is being ‘sucked’ into this loop, recycled up the back of the spine and returning down the front of the torso, as neutral/positive emotional energy, ready to be deployed by you in other directions.

Recycling rather than avoiding emotions is a great way to increase your energy levels and resilience in life. Initially the techniques can sound a bit eccentric, but once you try them a few times, the principles are not that complicated.

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The mind waving at itself & the Ocean-ness of consciousness

Post author By Toby
Post date February 9, 2026

“Observing mind-waves helps us to relate to thoughts in a different, free-er way than our normal, or conditioned perception allows”

Dear Integral Meditators,

All day your mind is waving at you, what does this mean? Find out in the article below! If you enjoy it, we will be exploring these methods in both the weekday (Weds eve) and Saturday sessions this week. You are invited!

If you are interested in Qi gong, do check out the Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels & for Self-Healing that I will be facilitating on the 28th Feb.

In the spirit of mind-waves,

Toby

The mind waving at itself & the Ocean-ness of consciousness

The ocean waves, the mind thinks

In Zen there is an expression; ‘the mind-waves’. Mind-waves is a term that helps us to relate to thoughts in a different way than we usually do. Our normal, or conditioned way of relating to thoughts is something like:

I am having thoughts – the thoughts are inside me; I am the possessor of the thoughts, the thoughts are the possessed object
I am identified with the thoughts – my identity has fused with the thoughts, to the extent that my sense of self has been reduced in the moment to this current train of thought

In meditation we can think of the mind, or consciousness as an ocean. The ocean is a vast body whose nature is water. Our mind is a vast containing space whose nature is awareness. The ocean ‘waves’, the currents and the wind produce waves on the surface of the water. The ocean and the waves are not two separate things; its is the nature of the ocean to ‘wave’ and the waves all have the nature of ‘ocean’.
Similarly, the currents in our mind and consciousness produce ‘thoughts’. It is the nature of the mind to ‘thought’ and the thoughts have the nature of the mind.

Practising: The mind waving to itself

Armed with our image then, we can start to watch our mind where we watch the mind ‘waving’ to itself. We notice that in the ‘ocean-field’ of our consciousness, there are thoughts coming and going. To get an initial feel for it you can use this method from my previous article:

“Use the body and breathing as an anchor for your attention. If you think about your attention as like a boat, and your thoughts and feelings as being like the waves, wind and other moving conditions around the boat. Your body and senses then become like the anchor that keeps the boat in one place. You don’t even need to try too hard still your mind and feelings. Just keep coming back to the anchor of your body, and you’ll find this gives you the basic ‘weight’ and stability for a sense of calm to start to come into your mind”

Once you feel relatively stable using this method, you can then simply practice watching the thoughts arising from your mind, like waves arising from the sea. You watch the mind ‘waving’ to itself, recognising the thoughts are a particular expression of the unlimited, oceanic nature of your own mind, or root-consciousness

Mind-waving and zones of the body

It can be interesting and informative to watch the waves of your mind whilst anchoring your attention at different levels of your physical body:

If you watch centered in your head, you will notice the mind-waves are more cognitive in nature
If you watch centered in your heart-centre, you will notice the mind-waves are more emotive in nature
If you watch centered in your belly, you will notice the mind-waves are more instinctual in nature

Watching from any of these levels, the watching of the waves should then lead to a capacity to relax into the nature of the mind itself; our formless timeless ‘Ocean-of-consciousness’. This is great for relaxation of you are a recreational meditator. If you are a professional, or more serious meditator then wave-watching is a great way to relate and connect to your already-awakened nature, and experience yourself as that.

Related reading:
Effortless wholeness – The ocean & it’s wave; not one, not two
Riding the Waves of the Mind
The sea snakes of the mind
A bag of rats & a big meadow (tactics or strategy?)

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Tues 13^th, Weds 14^th January, & then weekly – Beginners mind, resilient body – a 10-week integral meditation course

Starts Saturday 17^th January, 5.30-6.15pm, & then weekly – Beginners mind, resilient body deep-dive: An 11 -session practice series

Saturday 28th February, 9am-1pm – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels & for Self-Healing

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A Mind of Ease Beginners mind, resilient body creative imagery Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Presence and being present Stress Transformation Zen Meditation

A bag of rats & a big meadow (tactics or strategy?)

Post author By Toby
Post date February 3, 2026

“When you practice the ‘sheep in the meadow’ form of awareness, you can keep your attention on your ‘bigger Why’s,’ accepting the small obstacles that you encounter on the way toward your larger goals”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week I outline two images to help you refine and develop your awareness in a way that can significantly transform your daily experience. If you enjoy it, we will be exploring these methods in both the weekday (Tues&Weds) and Saturday sessions this week. You are invited!

If you are interested in Qi gong, do check out the Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels & for Self-Healing that I will be facilitating on the 28th Feb.

In the spirit of the meadow mind,

Toby

A bag of rats & a big meadow (tactics or strategy?)

This article explains what is essentially a perspective shift that changes your relationship to your thoughts, and how you experience them. It looks at how we can create an inner space for ourselves that contains a lot more acceptance and allowing. We will then look at some other applications of this principle in daily life.

The bag of rats – Your everyday ‘small’ mind

Imagine you are a rat in a dark sack. There are several other rats inside. It is dark, hot, and claustrophobic. You feel agitated by the rats around you, they in turn feel agitated by you. You have a very limited sense of where you are and what is happening to you, it is all close-up, friction-loaded and conducive to irritation, even paranoia.
In everyday life our mind can feel a bit like this bag of rats. It feels trapped inside our body. Often, we feel trapped in an even smaller space, the one between our ears, inside our skull! There are many thoughts about many things in this small space, bumping into each other, creating friction as they rub-up against the thoughts next to them. A lot of feelings and emotions are created from this rubbing. It is difficult to know which feelings come from which thoughts, and what emotional state came from where. It’s difficult not to get confused, to difficult to see our life clearly.
When your mind is like a bag of rats, life naturally feels a bit tough and contentious. States like acceptance, flow, curiosity come at a premium and are difficult to maintain.

The open meadow – Making your mind bigger

“To give your sheep or cow a large, spacious meadow is the way to control him” – Shunryu Suzuki

The quote from Suzuki above refers both to the method to control one’s mind, but also an approach to working with other people, and with experiences in our life. In terms of mind-training and meditation, this instruction stands in contrast to the ‘rats in the bag’ image from the first section. When sitting with the thoughts in your mind, rather than trying to control them, stop them or ‘fix’ them, you simply make your mind and awareness bigger, like a large open meadow. Rather than having your thoughts ‘in your head’ like rats in a bag, you make your mind big, with the thoughts like sheep in a big, spacious meadow. In such an environment an animal will tend to simply wonder off, find its place in the field and be content. So, when you make your awareness big, you can sit there watching the thoughts without being so bothered by them, and they in turn tend to gradually return to equilibrium, without you having to work that hard to control or fix them.

The movement from tactics, and making room for your ‘Big Why’

When your experience of your mind is of the ‘rats in the bag’ type, it is difficult to keep perspective. Everything that you are doing tends to be tactical, small picture, just dealing with what is right in front of you. When you practice the ‘sheep in the meadow’ form of awareness, you can keep things more in perspective. You can ‘choose your battles’. You can keep your attention on your ‘bigger Why’s’, accepting the small obstacles that you encounter on the way toward your broader goals.

Enjoy the meadow!

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Tags inner growth, integral meditation, integral meditation asia, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindful resilience, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation, power of mind, Zen