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None of it & all of it – Who are you really?

“If you freed your self-sense from it’s current limitations, what creative possibilities might arise?”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article looks at “Who am I really?” as an object of meditation. If you enjoy it you would be welcome to join us for the Tuesday & Wednesday, as well as the Saturday sessions this week, where we will be working with this meditation directly.

In the spirit of the simple feeling of Being,

Toby


None of it & all of it – Who are you really?

This article focuses on our self-sense as the gateway to a non-dual meditation experience. Really what it is is a series of mindful positions that will lead you progressively from your ‘small I’ to your ‘Big I’. It echoes the Hindu Vedanta school of meditation, some of the esoteric teachings of Christ within the Christian tradition, and Qabalah. All of these three have the ‘I AM’ as a central focus of meditation enquiry.

Out sense of self or I accompanies our every moment. Transforming this sense of self therefore has a tremendous impact in all domains of our life. If integrated well, we can find ourself happier, more motivated, more relaxed and more effective as a result of doing this meditation.

The simple feeling of being

The first object of meditation is the simple feeling of being. Notice how, at the centre of each moment of your experience is a sense of self, me or I, a being-ness.

Being trapped inside the skin

Secondly, notice how your sense of being, your ‘I’ seems to instinctively be located within your body, with the boundary being your skin. You, or ‘self’ is inside the body, with your thoughts, feelings, sensibilities, perspectives. The World and ‘others’ are outside. Small vulnerable self within, big word outside. Notice how this feeling of being/self affects every perception and experience you have.

Witnessing – “Not this, not that”

Notice within you that there is a witnessing consciousness, an observer that is not the body, not the mind, or your thoughts, beliefs, or emotions. It is not the job title you have, or the family position, or your tribulations or successes. Rather it is that which witnesses these with equanimity, transcending and including everything within its gaze. Notice also that this witness self is the source of the ‘simple feeling of being’ mentioned in the first position above. Separate out the Witness Self, and get used to “Holding to the attitude of the non-doer or witnessing Self in the midst of all actions”.  

None of this also = All of This!

Once you have freed your inner sense of self from identification with your body or other aspects of your everyday self, the experience is exactly that, a huge sense of freedom, liberation, a big letting go into a vaster, bigger all-encompassing Self.

The movement from here is toward the recognition that, since you are not any part of your small I, then you are free to identify Self as the Whole, as the Whole World, the whole Universe. Here you can simply sit and watch everything that arises within your field of awareness, recognizing it as Self. No more self and other, no more subjects and objects, just the Self, the I AM, the Simple Feeling of Being appearing as the World, as the Universe. To quote from a previous article, Self and the World become ‘Not one, not two’.

This final position also invokes two of my favourite bible quotes:

God’s revelation to Moses in Exodus 3:14, where God (appearing as the burning bush) says, “I AM WHO I AM” (or “I AM THAT I AM”) in response to the question “Who are you?”

Jesus’s response in John 8:58, where he states “Before Abraham was, I am.” What I AM is this? The formless timeless Witness, that lived within Jesus, and lives within us now. The I AM that is not any one part of the World, and so is all of it! 

Related reading: Awakening, not over-thinking

Self as the Gateway to the Expanded Self and to Universal Love and Compassion


© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops
 

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Ongoing on Tues & Weds, 7.30-8.30 pm – Freedom & Fullness – A practical introduction to non-dual meditation practice

Ongoing on Saturdays, 5.30-6-15pm  – Freedom & Fullness deep-dive non-dual meditation sessions

Tues 18th, Weds 19th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Saturday 2nd & Sunday 3rd May – The Call of the Wild: Shamanic Meditations for connecting to animal guides in the inner world Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Starts Tues 6th, Wednesday 7th May7.30-8.30pm – Shamanic meditations for connecting to your animal guides & familiars

Tuesday 13th & Wednesday 14th May – Wesak compassion & inner visioning meditation


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Time – a holograph from Eternity

“Time is a holograph from Eternity”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This weeks article outlines a way of relating to time in a radically different way how we usually do, offering a way to a space of peace and centred-ness wherever you find yourself. 

If you enjoy the article, then you are welcome to join the Tuesday & Wednesday, as well as the Saturday sessions this week, where we will be working with this meditation directly.

In the spirit of unity in diversity, 

Toby



Time – a holograph from Eternity
 
The Eternal Now
 
Tibetan Dzogchen meditation is one of several of the non-dual meditation schools to emphasize that time is an illusion. An illusion in the sense that, it appears that we move from a ‘real’ past, to a ‘real’ present, to a ‘real’ future in a linear, consecutive fashion. For them it is only the Now moment that exists. You can start to see through the illusion of time by challenging yourself to get out of this current present moment.

  • You think about the past and what happened there, but wait, that thought about the past is happening Now, right here!
  • You project yourself into the future, thinking intensely about an outcome, you see it with crystal clarity. But where is that thought about the future? It is right here, Now
  • When the past or future event you are thinking of happened/happens, were will it happen? Of course, in the Now
  • You can distract yourself from something that you find uncomfortable in the present by taking your attention away from the thing that is there, but where is that distraction? Once again, the distraction is occurring in the Now moment

 
All confusion and suffering from this perspective comes from the seeking mind, trying to find fulfilment outside the now, rather than recognising that you have already arrived. Where? In the Eternal, always already Present, where you have always been and always will be. By collapsing the illusion of linear time in to the Eternal Present, we contact the Unitive or Non-Dual condition of reality that underlies all the surface change.
 
Holographs from Eternity
 
Imagine you have a many faceted diamond at your heart, radiating rainbow lights out around you. If you go inside that diamond, you find a space that is Just This, the place of the Eternal Now. It is formless, size-less, time-less. You feel like when you are in this space that you are in a place that is infinitely small and infinitely big, all embracing, Unitive.
 
Sitting within your physical body, with the diamond at your heart, you see that the diamond is projecting time and space around you, just like a holographic projector. It projects the three-dimensional world all around you, with the appearance of time and space. It also projects your inner space, the space of your mind with thoughts, memories, images and emotions. From the space of the eternal Now, the illusory world of time and space arises around you, like a rainbow appearing in the sky.
 
As you watch and observe the holographic world around you, you can clearly see and feel that it is the dance of the Eternal now; arising from it, not separate from it, the illusion of multiplicity arising from our own singular, formless, timeless consciousness.
 
I’ve gone into the details of time and timelessness quite extensively in other articles, in this one I wanted to try and paint a picture that you can use and explore in meditation, one that if you can get your imagination behind, then you can really start to get a feeling for the Eternal Now as a gateway to the Non-Dual state. The Non-Dual state that it accesses is not one (like most other meditations) where you shift from an every-day state to a deeper meditative state. Rather it is a way of recognizing what is already Here, Now, whatever state of mind that you might find yourself in. Like other Non-Dual meditations this offers a way of integrating daily life and spiritual life into a mutually coherent, complementary whole.
 
Related articles: Dancing between time & eternity
Four Types of Present Moment


© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.co

Categories
Biographical Energy Meditation Greenworld Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation techniques Motivation and scope Presence and being present Primal Spirituality

Why meditate on & with animals?

“When meditating with animals, people often remark that their sense of time seems to take on a completely different quality”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This weeks article looks at the subject of meditating with animals, which humans have been doing since the practice of meditation began!

If you enjoy the article, then do have a look at the upcoming Masterclass, mini-retreat & class series that I will be doing on this subject, starting in May….

No classes this week, I’m off to lead a retreat in Australia for a week and commune with the land, nature, and of course the animals!

In the spirit of reconnection, 

Toby

 



Why meditate on & with animals?
 

I was asked the other day why I continue to guide workshops and classes on meditating with animals, given that to some of my client group it may seem a bit ‘strange’. Here are a few reasons to consider why meditating with animals is of great value, with a short practice at the end to try it out…

We’ve been doing it a long time

Prior to the transcendent spiritual traditions of Buddhism and Hinduism in the ‘east’ and Christianity/Islam in the ‘west’, human beings practiced an earth based spirituality where communion, learning and interaction with animals in the inner and outer worlds was a main part of our path to awakening and enlightenment. Our ability to do this type of meditation is long forgotten, but it is in our ‘dna’ so to speak, so most people find they can do it and have significant experiences without too much difficulty.

It re-connects us to parts of ourselves we have lost touch with

Meditating with animals connects us with our animal and instinctive nature in a benevolent way. It encourages us to use our imagination and capacity for inner visioning, and it encourages us to learn in a right brain creative, intuitive and visual way, very different from the way most of us use our minds and brains during the day.

Read full original article…

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.co


Saturday 2nd & Sunday 3rd May – The Call of the Wild: Shamanic Meditations for connecting to animal guides in the inner world Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Learn Shamanic meditation practices for connecting to animal guides in the inner world, & the energies of nature.
These sessions focus on how to re-discover and deepen your inner and outer connection to the animal kingdom as well as stimulate your inner growth and personal wellbeing though meditating with animal guides and familiars…read full details



Starts Tues 6th, Wednesday 7th May7.30-8.30pm – Shamanic meditations for connecting to your animal guides & familiars

Overview: This is a series of 9 classes where we tap into the ancient tradition of Nature Mysticism in general & Shamanic meditation in particular in order to:

  • Learn traditional meditation methods adapted for a contemporary time & age
  • Connect with animal guides in the spirit world to receive their gifts and guidance of wisdom, healing & power

Read full details…


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Making yourself bigger

“Whatever us going on in the small temporal experience you are having right now, you are bigger than it, and it is workable”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This weeks article looks at the scale of who you think you are, and suggests some mindful ways to change the balance in a positive way!

If you enjoy the article, we will be meditating on this topic in both the  Tues/Weds class  and the Saturday deep-dive sessions. I invite you to join us either live, online or via the recording.

In the spirit of bigger (in this case) being better, 

Toby

 



Making yourself bigger
 
The feeling of oppressed
 
Whenever we feel, if you observe the experience of being stressed, scared or overwhelmed, it is often something like:

  • My body feels contracted in on itself, reduced. My sense of ‘I’ follows this
  • The challenge feels LARGE, much bigger than mee, like a tall building or monster towering over you
  • A sense of being weak or helpless in the face of this massively larger, more powerful force

 
This feeling then makes not just the presenting challenge more difficult, but everything that happens to you. Life feels like a struggle, a trap, something that you are a victim of.
 
Working with scale
 
About eight years ago I had an experience sitting in meditation where I felt my body was not just a small body sitting in my room, but large, as big, bigger than the apartment block. It was as if I was sitting in the landscape like a large building, looking down upon everything. Along with this literal feeling was an experience of feeling stronger, more powerful in relation to my life. It changed my sense of how I existed in relation to my challenges, in relation to what was possible. As well as power, there was a feeling of calm confidence.
I stayed with this feeling for several weeks, letting it become a part of my foundational way of going and being, I had literally become bigger!
 
Beyond psychology
 
The Yogachara school of Buddhism asserts that all our internal problems come from a mistaken sense of self. We perceive ourself as a small being, inside our skin, with a separate, foreign world outside of us. In reality, it asserts, our True Self, or Self-as-Consciousness is infinite and boundless. As this infinite and boundless self, we are not in the world, the world is in us! We are as huge infinite and boundless as consciousness itself!
By engaging in some simple Yogachara-ic ‘mindful shifts’ we can achieve some quite remarkable changes in our experience, I’m placing a few below.
 
Some mindful positions on Bigness
 
Sitting in meditation, walking, or otherwise in a state where you can settle into a mindful condition, use the following simple sentences as anchors for exploration:

  • I am not in my body, my body is in me (as a boundless, timeless consciousness)
  • I am not in the room, the room is in me
  • I am not walking/sitting in this landscape, the landscape is in me
  • I am not on the Earth, the planet is in me
  • I am not within the orbit of the moon, the Lunar sphere is within me
  • I am not within the Sun & solar system (Galaxy, Universe, whole of Creation), they are within me
  • I am not in life, life is within me, I am Life

Everything is happening within you, within your boundless Body, Mind and Heart. Whatever us going on in the small temporal experience you are having right now, you are bigger than it, and it is workable.
 
Related reading:
Non-Dual meditation & Organismic reality
Making yourself big
Connecting to Your Big Mind (Is the Mind in the Body or the Body in the Mind?)
Born from Life, not into it
Small Focused Mind, Big Open Mind


© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.co


All upcoming classes & workshops
 

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Starts Tues 11th, Weds 12th February, 7.30-8.30 pm – Freedom & Fullness – A practical introduction to non-dual meditation practice

Begins Saturday 15th February – Freedom & Fullness deep-dive non-dual meditation sessions

Tues 18th, Weds 19th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation


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Integral Meditation Asia

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A Mind of Ease Concentration Enlightened Flow Inner vision Insight Meditation Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Meditation techniques mind body connection Presence and being present Primal Spirituality spiritual intelligence Zen Meditation

Prajna – Seeing things from all angles & none

“Prajna is awareness that does not break reality into opposites. When you are feeling broken-apart by the world, it is a place you can return to, finding wholeness instantly”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

The meditation processes I describe below are part of the ongoing theme of Non-Duality practice that I have been writing about the last few weeks. The beauty of them is that they are simple at the same time as profound. Have a go at developing your prajna!

If you enjoy the article, we will be meditating on this topic in both the  Tues/Weds class  and the Saturday deep-dive sessions. I invite you to join us either live, online or via the recording!

In the spirit of prajna, 

Toby

 



Prajna – Seeing things from all angles & none
 
Dualistic or conceptual reality
 
From the point of view of the Madhyamika Buddhist meditation school, confusion and suffering derives at its root from what is called dualistic-appearance. Dualistic appearance is basically what happens when we conceptualize. Conceptual thinking and feeling does two things:

  • When we see an object or person (or belief etc…) we then throw our idea of the object on top of the object itself, so now there are two things appearing to us, not just one. This is one reason why it is called dualistic appearance.
  • Secondly, we see the world in terms of opposites, polarities, or dualities, for example good and bad, higher, and lower, better or worse, nirvana (freedom) and samsara (bondage).

Dualistic appearance sees the object together with our idea of the object, and then we conceptualize the object in terms of its opposites.
For example, let us say you or I meet a female primary school teacher. The first instant you see her, you will see her ‘as she is’. In the next moment your mind will start throwing concepts on her based upon things like:

  • Your experience of primary school
  • Your assessment of teachers
  • Whether she is your child’s teacher or not

You will start making assessments in terms of opposites:

  • She’s a better/worse teacher than my primary school teacher
  • She is polite/rude
  • She is admirable/contemptible
  • She is superior/inferior to me

Of course, using these dualities well is essential for navigating the world effectively. But it is also this same duality that prevents us from seeing the world as it is, from seeing reality from an Ultimate or Absolute point of view, and that creates all sorts of sufferings and problems for us.
 
Seeing dualistic appearance / Pranja – Dropping dualistic appearance
 
In our own self-enquiry, we can start to look for and see the processes of our own dualistic appearance. We can watch how we ‘throw’ our ideas onto people and things, and box them into polarities. This is a very interesting and powerful practice in itself. We can then practice dropping our ideas about what we are seeing, and try to encounter things as they are, in a singular, non-dual manner. One way to do this is to practice the ‘mirror mind’ method that I outline in a precious article. You imagine that your awareness is a mirror, simply reflecting back what it sees without adding or subtracting to it. This non-dual way of viewing the world is called prajna, or wisdom.
 
 
Seeing things from all angles and none
 
Another complementary technique to mirror mind that you can use is explained by Ken Wilber in his article on ‘Five Reasons You Are Not Enlightened’. I’m just going to quote it directly below, as it is very clear:
“One little exercise I use to get into a state of pure awareness without any conceptual operation is to: Ask yourself how do you feel physically? So, you start to get a sense of how that is. How do you feel emotionally? How do you feel morally? How do you feel mentally? Now how do you feel from all those angles at once?
As soon as you hear that question, there is a silence in the mind, a quiet, there’s no immediate answer that comes up. And that is because you have an awareness that is not conceptualizing and not feeling. It’s just pure, unqualifiable awareness. And that is an example of prajna, or being in pure awareness without concepts. And so, remaining in that state sooner or later allows you to have a realization of Ultimate Reality, where emptiness and form are not two. Where samsara and nirvana are not two. Because it is an awareness that does not break reality into opposites. And so this type of awareness is the fundamental practice of the Madhyamika, and in many cases Mahayana schools of Buddhism”.
 
Related readingMirror mind meditation
Dualistic Appearance – What you see, and what you think you see


© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.co


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Inner transformation – Slippers & carpets

“Seeing reality isn’t easy, because our mind throws our idea of what we think we are seeing onto what we see”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article looks a wise way to mindfully work with what you can control in your life. If you like the article, you are invited to come along to this week’s Tuesday & Wednesday meditation class, where we will be taking this subject as our object of meditation.
 
Also a heads up for this Saturday’s Deep-dive breathing meditation masterclass where we will focus on developing a multi-faceted breathing meditation practice that helps you grow and learn in the face of life’s challenges, and connect you to deep inner stability.
 
In the spirit of slippers,

Toby

 



Inner transformation – Slippers & carpets
 
TRANSFORMATION – by Anthony De Mello
To a disciple who was forever complaining about others, the Master said, “If it is
peace you want, seek to change yourself, not other people. It is easier to protect your feet
with slippers than to carpet the whole of the earth.”
 
This short story is one that I used to use a lot when I was teaching meditation classes as a monk back in the 1990’s. It’s a really good analogy for helping to re-orientate our attention when we are feeling out of balance, and if you think about meditation as a way of ‘protecting your feet with slippers’, then it’s a nice way to encourage regular practice!
 
Annoyed and overwhelmed – trying to fix the world
 
It’s easy to get in the trap of being in a situation where you have limited control, trying to control everything, and then feeling frustrated, disappointed and overwhelmed. This goes for smaller scale situations at work or at home, or simply when watching or reading about world events on the news. ‘Carpeting the world’ is a huge ask which, if you think about it rationally is a ridiculous thing to be trying to do. But if we are not mindful, we keep on attempting it and reap the same result time and time again.

  • In your relationships, are you trying to ‘fix’ your partner instead of working on ways that you can stay inwardly centred yourself?
  • At work do you often find yourself complaining about how it ‘should’ be, rather than accepting what is and making choices based on that?

Mindful of your locus of control – dancing between acceptance and assertion

“What is it that I am in control of here?” Is always a good question to ask as a way to find out how to work with a situation. One consistent answer that you will notice coming back to you time and time again is “I am (potentially) in charge of my thoughts, attitudes and emotions regarding this situation”.

In other worlds you can control what is going in within you. Working on what you notice happening inside is a way of ‘making slippers’ that will always give a high reward wherever you are. Of course, you can’t control literally every thought and feeling, but you can take responsibility for your inner life, and start to make improvements that begin protecting your feet from stones and other sharp objects.

Maybe there are some things outside of you that you are also in control of, so you can consider asserting yourself and acting around these as well. But asking what you are in control of will also make obvious lots of things that you simply can’t control and have to accept. In this sense acceptance of our limits of control should always be a part of our ‘slipper building’ process. For example, I find it quite a relief thinking about the limits of my control regarding whether people like me or not, or want to work with me. I just do what I can within the limits of conscience, and then relax!

One of the biggest and most useful things to accept is ‘I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO CARPET THE WORLD!’

Three mindful slipper positions

In this situation (of your choice):

  • Am I trying to carpet the world rather than make slippers?
  • What do I need to accept in order to make my slippers?
  • What inwardly and outwardly can I do that will also contribute to my slipper building?

Related article: Effortless adaptation – Solving all your problems & none (II)


© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Upcoming Meditation classes & workshops in with Toby:

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm 
– Weekly integral meditation classes

From Tues 7th/Weds 8th January, 7.30-8.30pm – The Wisdom of Awakening Series – Meditation for leaping into reality

Saturday, 25th January9.30-11.30am – Deep-dive breathing meditation masterclass

Saturday, 25th January, 5-6pm – Engaged mindfulness & meditation class – ‘Honesty, release and redirection – three levels of non-judgment’

Wednesday 29th January, 7.30-8.30pm – Lunar New Year Meditation 2025: Developing your wisdom, intuition & renewal in the year of the wood snake


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Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Enlightened Flow Essential Spirituality Inner vision Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Resilience One Minute Mindfulness Presence and being present Zen Meditation

Awakening, not over-thinking

“Growth is achieved by degrees. Enlightenment is instantaneous”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article looks at the practice of waking-up, which is something that we can practice ‘leaping’ into anytime, anywhere. If you like the article, you are invited to come along to this week’s Tuesday & Wednesday meditation class, where we will be taking this subject as our object of meditation.

In the spirit of awakening, 

Toby

 



Awakening, not over-thinking
 
Enlightenment – Waking up to the freedom of awareness
There is a precept in soto zen that goes something like “One must not wait for awakening.” What this means is that you can touch the freedom of the present moment simply by letting go of your pre-occupations and awakening to exactly where you are. You might think of this enlightenment or awakening as having three levels. You start at level one, which even a beginner can do in a rudimentary way, and as you build confidence you work onto levels two and three.
 
Level one involves simply being fully present to an experience. It could be physical/sensory, it could be thought, or even the more subtle experience of awareness itself. You might think of it as a non-resistance to what is, an acceptance that facilitates an awakening to life in the moment.
 
Level two involves noticing that there is an observer within you, a witness that is present to whatever is there. This witness is the ‘I Am’ within you. With a bit of practice, you can not only awaken to objects of awareness in the present, but also that which is aware of the objects in the present, which is the witness, or your enlightened nature itself.
 
Level three involves insight into the not oneness and not two-ness of the object of awareness (level one) with that which witnesses the object of awareness (level two)’

  • If the witnessing awareness is like the ocean, the object of awareness is like a wave
  • If the witnessing awareness is like the sun, the object of awareness is like a light-ray from the sun

This non-one, not-two experience moves us toward a non-dual or unitive awakening in the moment.
The above three practices are methods of awakening, or ‘Waking up’, and you really just have to commit to doing it again and again, awakening to this moment of your life as best you can and ‘improving’ through practice.
 
Awakening, not over-thinking – a practical reflection
 
Over the Christmas period I travelled back to see my family, and spent almost the entire time sick with a bad flu. One of the main ways in which I worked with this in terms of enlightenment and awakening was simply practicing the three levels above:

  1. Being present to the experience as it was
  2. Being aware of my witness
  3. Resting the not-one, not-two-ness of positions one and two

This enabled me to:

  • not over-think about the ‘bad luck’ or difficulty of my situation
  • simply accept it as I found it.

As a result, I was able to minimize my pain, make the experience into a form of meditation, and endure it with a degree of patience.
Of course, I did spend some time thinking and reflecting on my experience, but (almost)) always in the context of finding mental perspectives that are useful and helpful, rather than ruminating.
 
I’ll end with a short story from Anthony De Mello entitled “Rebirth” that illustrates nicely some important ideas around awakening related to this article.
 
REBIRTH
“Make a clean break with your past and you will be enlightened,” said the ‘Master.
“I am doing that by degrees.”
“Growth is achieved by degrees. Enlightenment is instantaneous.”
Later he said, “Take the leap! You cannot cross a chasm in little jumps.”


© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Meditation classes & workshops in January 2025 with Toby:

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm 
– Weekly integral meditation classes

From Tues 7th/Weds 8th January, 7.30-8.30pm – The Wisdom of Awakening Series – Meditation for leaping into reality

Saturday 18th January 9am-12.30pm – Meditations for Developing the Language of Your Shadow Self Workshop

Saturday, 25th January9.30-11.30am – Deep-dive breathing meditation masterclass

Saturday, 25th January, 5-6pm – Engaged mindfulness & meditation class – ‘Honesty, release and redirection – three levels of non-judgment’


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Destiny & fate, empowerment or victimhood?

“The micro-actions that we do add up, like drops of water in a pot. Do enough of them and they can create a sea-change in your life, & your destiny”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article explores the distinctions between destiny & fate, & how to use mindfulness to work with them creatively in your life. 

If you enjoy the article, it will be the focus subject of this week’s Tuesday & Wednesday evening class , you’d be welcome to come along, live or online!
This class is also the first in a series on the ‘Wisdom of awakening’, details of which are below.

In the spirit of destiny,

Toby
 


 
Article of the week

Destiny & fate, empowerment or victimhood?
 
DESTINY
To a woman who complained about her destiny the Master said, “It is you who make
your destiny.”
“But surely I am not responsible for being born a woman?”
“Being born a woman isn’t destiny. That is fate. Destiny is how you accept your
womanhood and-what you make of it.”
 From Anthony De Mellos ‘One minute wisdom’
 
Mindful of your destiny
 
Here we might consider destiny as “what you do with what life has given you”. You may recognize the voice within yourself that says ‘I have no choice or freedom here, I am a victim of circumstance, there is nothing I can do about this (except complain, or feel hard done by). In this context our destiny is understood as what we make of what we have got/have been given. In this sense destiny is a creative word; we create our destiny, it is in our hands. Sitting mindfully with a phrase such as “I am the primary creator of my destiny” and opening to the feelings and energy that comes from that can help us to access this inner power.
 
Accepting of your fate
 
In the same way that creating our destiny is a power, so is accepting our fate. Indeed, creating our destiny depends upon our acceptance of the life and circumstances we have been given. Without this acceptance there is no way that we can work with what we have, because we reject it. This non-acceptance actively prevents us from asking the question “What can I do with what I have got?” In a certain sense, acceptance is a type of positive indifference to our fortune, whether it be good or bad. It simply opens to what is, and this accepting of what is opens the doorway to destiny-creation.
 
Mindful of victimhood
 
Acceptance of our fate is not passive victim-consciousness. It is a strength that pre-ceeds the power of destiny-creation. Pick an area of your life where something maybe has not turned out that great (in your limited opinion), and practice observing and breathing with it in the spirit of acceptance. After a while you will start to see quite clearly that it is calm, collected, and empowering. It is not at all like victim-consciousness or feeling persecuted. It is a power, not a weakness.
 
Empowering yourself to create your destiny though mindful questions
 
These can be asked around a specific part of your life, or in a more general sense:
What is the fate that I need to accept?
What is the destiny that I can choose to embrace and create?
Where is the voice of the victim-of-fate within me? How can I prevent it sabotaging me?
What is/are the next step/s today to creating my destiny?
 
Micro & macro destiny
 
You might think of destiny as being mainly about the big things in your life, and the big achievements. That is not untrue, but equally I think it’s about the things that you choose in small situations, in micro-experiences. After all, the micro-actions that we do add up, like drops of water in a pot. Do enough of them and they can create a sea-change in your life and your destiny!
 
Related articleIntention determines trajectory – Aspects of integrated mindful intention

 © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


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A Mind of Ease Concentration Energy Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Presence and being present Tree of Life Zen Meditation

Your basic mandala of presence – The four trees

“Whenever you feel scattered, sit in your mandala of presence, & feel the return of your basic sanity”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article explores the idea and practice of a ‘Meditation mandala’ that can be used in various ways to improve the elements of your practice, enjoy!

This week’s Tues/Weds meditation session is on “Envisioning & presence, climbing the mindful mountain”,
And this Saturday at 30th  1700 SG time is the Engaged mindfulness & meditation online class on the subject of the three C’s of engaged mindfulness. 

In the spirit of presence,

Toby
 



Tues & Weds 26th & 27th Nov, 7.30-8.30pm, Integral Meditation class (Live & online): Climbing the mindful mountain; intention & your life-design

“Envisioning involves visualizing with hope, optimism and appropriate ambition a goal that you want to achieve in the future, being specific about what it looks like”

This is a meditation class about:

  1. How to connect what you do each day to the life you want to manifest
  2. To link your medium and long term goals to your everyday actions.
  3. To enjoy this process and build Confidence in yourself as you do it

 
Article of the week: Your basic mandala of presence – The four trees
 
We can consider our basic meditation state as being the following:
Not lost in thought, not falling asleep, in the present moment, and aware of an anchor, or focus point in the present, such as the body and breathing
 
Once we have a sense of our basic meditation state, we can expand the definition a little, just to refine and deepen our sense of presence:
Basic meditative presence is not being lost in thought, not falling asleep, in the present moment, and aware of an anchor, or focus point in the present, such as the body and breathing. Furthermore it is not being absorbed in the future, and not living in the past.
 
These definitions give us a blue-print for building meditative presence, that we can then use as a basic ‘space’ within which we can place any other meditation practice that we may wish to develop,

  • If you want to place basic vipassana or witnessing meditation in there, you can
  • If you want to focus on mantra yoga in there, you can
  • If you want to do sports visualization you can
  • If you want to practice therapeutic mindfulness you can

You get the idea; you can use it for other meditation practices. Equally you can use it as a meditation practice in itself. I like to do this by creating what I call a ‘Mandala of presence’:
 
Imagine yourself sitting in a peaceful place between four trees, one is in front of you, one behind, one to the left, one to the right. See them as being maybe 2-4 meters distance away. Now simply use your body & breathing as an anchor for your awareness in the present moment, and stay there. The trees are your boundary-points:

  • Going beyond the left-hand tree means getting lost in thought
  • Going beyond the right-hand tree means falling asleep
  • Going beyond the tree behind you means living in the past
  • Going beyond the tree in front of you means being lost in the future

 
Notice you can be present to thoughts without being lost in them. You can also feel a little sleepy without falling asleep. You can be aware of a thought about past or future without living in the past or being lost in the future. So, it is quite a broad, forgiving space that you can hang out in and build stable, good quality, increasingly deep meditative presence.
 
A simple way to enhance the practice is to breathe as follows:

  • Breathing in, breathe your energy into your body, into the present and feel the fullness of that presence
  • As you breathe out, relax into the freedom of your awareness in the present

Build your sense of both freedom and fullness of presence as you meditate, dropping gradually deeper and deeper into meditation.
 
This is a practice I use not just in formal meditation, but also informally. Whenever I feel a little scattered, I bring my attention back to the here and now, sit between the four trees for a while, and return to my basic sanity.
 
Related reading:
The foundational pillars or ‘goal-posts’ of meditative presence
Finding Your Spiritual, Physical Home
Making your physical awareness balanced & whole
Sky & sun, freedom & fullness© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


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Inner vision Integral Awareness Integrating Ego, Soul and Spirit Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Shadow meditation

The essence of shadow integration

Dear Toby,

The article below looks at the essence of shadow integration practice. I’m writing it as I prepare for three shadow events, firstly on Saturday 16th, 1700-1800 Singapore time: Making Pearls from Sand: Free online session on mindfully working with your shadow-self.

Following on from this are the Shadow work & Language of the shadow workshops  in the following weeks. 

You are invited to participate in your own journey of the shadow! 

Toby


Id to ego, It to I; The essence of shadow integration
 
As you may be aware, it was Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung who first coined the term ‘shadow’ as an aspect of their theories of the conscious and unconscious minds. They indicated the split that can occur between the two when parts of our personality/psychological self are repressed and banished to the unconscious mind, with the resulting phenomenon of the shadow self being a part of the result.
When Freud was asked about the essence of his method, he is famous for saying “Where the Id was the Ego shall be”. Essentially his meaning appears in translation as being our unconscious passions and desires (the Id) shall be consciously integrated into our ego-self, thus affecting a healing of the personality, and a move toward wholeness.
 
The original statement from Freud in German is “Wo Es war soll Ich werden”. In order to make it sound a bit more ‘academic’ James Strachey, Freud’s English translator translated ‘Es’ into ‘Id’, and ‘Ich’ into ‘ego’. However, as I understand, the two terms have a more common, colloquial meaning:

  • ‘Es’ is the German personal pronoun es is the English equivalent of ‘it’
  • ‘Ich’ is the German pronoun meaning ‘I’
     

So then, if you re-translate Freud’s statement you get:

Where the it was the I shall be

This then throws a clarifying light upon the process of shadow integration that goes something like this; Our shadow is all the primal and instinctual passions (‘bad’ and ‘good’) within us that we have pushed out of our conscious mind into our unconscious. Here they have become something that is not ‘me’ but an ‘it’, something not me, alien and threatening to myself. Shadow integration involves noticing the clues regarding what lies in my repressed unconscious, for example:

  • Repeating dreams about being chased by a monster
  • Being unusually emotionally triggered by particular types of people (Eg: aggressive, powerful or egotistic people)
  • Suffering baffling anxiety in the face of certain life circumstances

Having picked up on these clues we then work on owning and re-integrating the repressed material, making it into part of ‘me’. By doing so what was previously an ‘it’ in my unconscious becomes part of my ‘I’. This is what Freud meant when he said “Where the it was the I shall be”, and that is really the essence of shadow work.
 
De-fragmenting the self
If you can imagine how fragmented our self-sense is when lots of parts of it have become ‘its’ within our shadow unconscious, then you can also start to see how empowering and positive shadow work is. As we collect the fragmented ‘its’ and gather them back into our I, our I starts to feel strong, resilient and whole in ways that we had forgotten was possible. Our vigour and appetite for life returns, in tandem with our peace of mind and a sense of profound, relative calm.
 
Read more of Toby’s articles in the Shadow section of his blog: https://tobyouvry.com/category/shadow-meditation/


© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com