Category: Awareness and insight

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Balanced self-awareness, mindful self-consciousness

“Balanced self-awareness is the foundation of most other healthy psychological capacities, so it is well worth being consistent and persistent around”

Dear <<First Name>>,

This week’s article looks at self-awareness as an object of mindfulness; why it is important to have the right type of self-awareness, and how to begin cultivating it consistently.

In the spirit of self-awareness,  

Toby
 

Balanced self-awareness, mindful self-consciousness
 
Often mindfulness is associated with increased self-awareness. Implicit in this might be the assumption that all self-awareness is good self-awareness. This is something worth noting, as it is not necessarily the case.
 
Imbalanced or neurotic self-awareness
 
Here are a few examples of ways in which self-awareness can be unhelpful and/or work against us:

  • We could be overly self- aware, in a way that is debilitating or anxiety stimulating. For example, in social situations we could be excessively concerned about what other people may be thinking of us or how we look
  • We could be self-aware with non-acceptance and neurotic intention. By this I mean we can be self-aware, but unhappy with who we are, wishing we were someone else, possessing a different physical appearance or character. This self-awareness produces conflict and discomfort
  • We can be self-aware in a very judgmental or aggressive way, obsessing about mistakes made, or ways in which we are ‘not good enough’ or a ‘fake’
  • We could be self-aware, but projecting the past and future onto the present moment, so that who and what we see is not a realistic image of the person that is actually there

In all the above cases, an element of self-awareness is present, but it is not helping us, and not enjoyable. If our habitual self-awareness is like this, then then quite naturally we are then going to try and avoid self-awareness when we can, because it is such a difficult experience. We could spend our time flip-flopping between neurotic self-awareness and desperate attempts to distract ourselves and become less self-aware!

Balanced mindful self-awareness

Here are some characteristics of what balanced self-awareness looks like:

  • To be self-aware as an observer. By this I mean that part of good self-awareness is that we are merely aware, with a healthy degree of curious objectivity.
  • To be self-aware with acceptance and kind intention. By this I mean there is a deliberate effort to be at peace with the person we are in the moment, supportive of them and not at war with them. To be supportive of ourselves means to extend a basic kind and caring intention to ourselves, making this an integral part of our basic self-consciousness
  • With compassionate judgment. Here I mean that the inner commentary that goes with our self-awareness can express discernments and judgments, but their nature is supportive and caring, consistent with the kindness and caring intention.  
  • Finally, our self-awareness should be on purpose, deliberate and in the present moment. On purpose means we are conscious of the quality of our self-awareness, making it in-line with the characteristics mentioned above. In the present means being with the self or person that we are in the here and now, rather than lost in past selves or ideas of our future selves unconsciously.

 
There are four characteristics of balanced self-awareness that I mention above. In your own practice you can take one or two of these at a time, becoming familiar with the feel of them, and making them gradually habitual and intuitive. If we can make our self-awareness balanced, then we will start to enjoy it and trust it. When this happens, it becomes natural to want to be more self-aware, because good things come of it. Balanced self-awareness is really the foundation of almost all other healthy psychological capacities, so it is well worth being consistent and persistent around!
 
Related article: What is self-awareness?
© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


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Nirvana

“Drop into your Nirvana to regenerate, & re-establish your inner freedom when you want to”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

Nirvana may sound or feel like an abstraction, unrelated to your life & workplace experience, in the article below I try and make the idea of Nirvana accessible, & offer some ways to start making it experientially real for you…

Two sessions this week: 
Tues & Weds 17th & 18th September, 7.30-8.30pm – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation
Sat September 21st, 5-6pm Singapore time – Engaged mindfulness & meditation online class : The dance of relaxation & alertness

You are invited!

In the spirit of Nirvana, 

Toby

 


Nirvana – Finding your Ground
 
Where is Nirvana?
 
If you sit quietly in meditation for a while, you will start to notice the presence of spaces and silences between all the sensory, mental and emotional movement. When you notice these spaces, you start to discover what is called “Causal” consciousness, or the formless, timeless consciousness that acts as the ‘ground’ or basis of our being and experience. Dropping deeper into this Causal consciousness, we start to notice that, when we relax into these spaces we touch a sense of freedom, a liberation from all of the discomfort and ‘spikiness’ of our everyday life.
Developing and growing our contact with this causal level of consciousness, the “Ground” of our being gives us the basis for what in original Buddhism is called Nirvana. Nirvana is a Sanskrit word that is part of a numbner of “Nir” words. “Nir” basically means “without,” “not,” “none”.

  • Nirvana means “A state without grasping or desire”
  • Nirvakalpa means “Without thought forms”
  • Nirguna means “Without qualities”
  • Nirodh means “Pure extinction, total cessation”

 
They all point to variations of a completely Empty, Formless, Unqualifiable reality that lies underneath our experience of inner and outer forms. So, to build our own Nirvana, we look to cultivate this state in meditation (and later integrate it into daily life), a state in which we are:

  • relaxed, free from grasping or desire
  • free from thinking (without thought forms)
  • free from moods, emotions, personality traits (without qualities)
  • resting in a state of radical, free emptiness (extinction, total cessation)

To cultivate this state is to cultivate your Nirvana, your inner freedom, your liberation, resting in the formless, timeless emptiness that is the ground of being.
Don’t worry, if you do this you won’t become a ‘nobody’ in the everyday world! But you will experience yourself differently, and you will be able to drop into your Nirvana to regenerate and re-establish your inner freedom when you want to, now that you have access to it.
 
Nirvana and the Witness
Within your Nirvana, your formless timeless freedom, you will notice there is a Witness, an observer self. It has no qualities than the capacity to watch, notice, to be conscious of. You can use your Witness to build your Nirvana, and you can use your Nirvana to build your Witness. Building your competency in both, you build two major dimensions of a qualified meditation practice. Here are a few ways to start this. You can begin these exercises in sitting meditation, but with time you will be increasingly able to do them informally in daily life:

  • Use your Witness self to observe your desires and passions. After a while then gently drop your passions and Witness Nirvana, the state of freedom from grasping or desire
  • Use your Witness self to observe your thoughts and thinking. After a while then gently drop your thinking and Witness Nirvakalpa, the state of freedom from thoughtforms
  • Use your Witness self to observe your personality traits, moods, and other qualities. After a while then gently drop your thinking and Witness Nirguna, the state of freedom from qualities, a “person-less person”
  • The above three exercises give you a sound basis for developing your “Nirodh” your state of “Pure extinction, total cessation”, your state of radical, free emptiness, which you can then use to notice and rest in your Witness, the formless, timeless observer self.

Resting in this Witness then radically improves your capacity to deepen your states of Nirvana, Nirguna, Nirvakalpa and Nirodh. Which is another way of saying you re becoming a Free man or Free woman, resting in your own Nirvana!
 
Related articles: Eternal life (& where to find it)
The path of no-escape


Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com
 


Saturday 28th September, 9.30am-12.30pm –Developing Your Self-Confidence Through Mindfulness Workshop

In a sentence: Learn how you can develop greater self confidence in express it in your life using specific mindfulness practices.

Overview: How many things in your life would you be doing differently if you were thinking and acting from a place of deep self confidence?

This is a 3hour workshop where you will be taught practices that are designed to make a tangible difference to your levels of everyday confidence and inner wellbeing…read full details

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Anchoring & moving from center

“Breathe into the fullness of your attention and intention. Breathe out relax into the freedom of awareness. At the bottom of the breath rest in stillness”

Dear Toby, 

This week’s article focuses on centering as a theme, & outlines a practice that you can do to help you center effectively in a number of key ways…
If you enjoy the article, you can explore aspects of it at this weeks Tuesday or Wednesday class, live or online.
And heads up for anyone who may be interested in the Developing Your Self-Confidence Through Mindfulness Workshop on the 28th September.

In the spirit of centered-ness, 

Toby

 


Anchoring & moving from center
 
In this article I want to bring together a few techniques into a ‘Form’. A form basically means a practice that is quite simple, and can be done at the level of the person doing it, beginner or more advanced. The characteristic of a form is that it grows with the abilty of the practitioner, thus remaining relevant to us as we grow. The three domains we bring together in this form are:

  • Physical and energetic centering
  • The ‘holy trinity’ of integral mindfulness; intention, attention and awareness
  • Our foundational freedom, fullness, and stillness

 
Centering

Imagine a line of light coming down from the sky. Imagine it descending through the crown of your head, and down through the dead-center of your body, brain, neck, chest, abdomen hips. It then leaves through your perineum and descends into the earth moving through the center of the Earth’s core. Feel this line of light to be in the middle of the front and back, left and right halves of your body. As you breathe in, breathe your energy into this ‘vertical core’ of your body, as you breathe out, feel yourself relaxing from center, from the core to the periphery of your body.**
After few breaths, locate the mid-point of your vertical core between your crown and your perineum. This is the mid-point of your torso, the absolute physical centre. Imagine this as a point of light, somewhere between your heart-centre and solar-plexus. Breathe into this mid-point, gathering your energy & power there. Breathe out, relax from your mid-point. Feel the inner balance that this practice starts to give rise to.
 
Aligning your mindfulness with your center

Now imagine that the three foundations of mindfulness, your intention, attention and awareness (IAA) are all focused within your vertical core, and particularly your mid-point/center. If you like, imagine your mid-point becomes like a little sun, shining your intention, attention and awareness out from your centre in a balanced, powerful and harmonious manner. Initially you can keep this a general feeling around your IAA, but then if you like you can make it into a practice around a specific domain of your life, reflecting upon particular intentions, and ways of directing your attention and awareness in this situation. Just centring your IAA and then holding a situation in mind, seeing if from this balanced point of center can be a surprisingly powerful and useful practice.
 
Relaxing into freedom, fullness and stillness

As you breathe in, imagine the sun-like fullness of your balanced intention glowing brightly. As you breathe out, imagine it shining out into the freedom of your sky-like awareness. Enjoy this feeling of freedom and fullness. If you like. As you reach the end of your exhalation, pause briefly, and relax into the physical and mental stillness in that pause. So, then we have:

  • Breathing into the fullness of attention and intention
  • Breathing out relaxing into the freedom of awareness
  • At the bottom of the breath resting in stillness

There is a lot in this form, but I hope you can see that the basic elements are really quite simple. The felt benefits are fairly immediate, and as your practice deepens, so will your experience of the form!
 
**When people start to meditate, quite often they notice that they feel ‘lop-sided’ with one side of the body feeling full of energy and the opposite side feeling empty or without feeling. Centering practice can really help with the re-balancing of this.
 
Related reading: Locating your deep centre
The holy trinity of mindfulness
Sky & sun, freedom & fullness

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

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The sky of freedom, the fullness of the sun

“Meditative presence – The fullness of our whole being combined with a sense of inner spaciousness and freedom”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

Next week is the start of the Autumn meditation series Meditating with the power of intention – An eleven module course. One of the foundational intentions that we will be working with is the intention to awaken. This weeks article looks at what we are awakening to in meditation, whether we are a beginner or more advanced!

In the spirit of freedom & fullness, 

Toby
 


Sky & sun, freedom & fullness
 
Meditative presence might be thought of as having two basic qualities; freedom and fullness. There are many levels or ‘octaves’ of this experience, ranging from the foundational experience of the beginner, to the deep awakening of more experienced practitioners. The nice thing about relating to meditative presence in this way is that we can experience it on the level that we are at, and grow it as the days, months and years go by. This month I have experienced a tangible deepening of my own experience of this. I have been practising for thirty years, I don’t expect it to be the last time, it’s a process that really has no edges to it!
 
So, what do we mean freedom and fullness? In a previous article I described meditative presence as being:
Full, not empty – When we sit in awareness of the present moment, we start to feel a sense of fullness in that moment. We can then turn up to life with this feeling of fullness, which helps counterbalance the feeling of emptiness that many people feel when they think about themselves and their life.
Empty, not full – Sitting with awareness in the present moment enables us to empty of all the complex thinking and inner noise that our mind is overburdened or overfilled with. We access a sense of ‘empty’ pleasurable inner spaciousness.

Meditation enables us to connect to the fullness of our own presence, and the sense of completeness or wholeness that that gives us. It also enables us to empty our mind of busy thoughts, also and empty our body of excessive tension, giving rise to a sense of inner spaciousness and freedom. In meditative presence there is a chance to step into a deep sense of inner fullness and freedom, starting to relate to ourselves as being fundamentally, in essence that way; full, whole, free, liberated. Starting to relate to ourselves in this way as we go about daily life, we may also start noticing changes in our behaviour and how we experience things. We feel less oppressed and trapped, and more creative, spontaneous, and playful.
 
The sky of freedom, the fullness of the sun

One image that can be useful and powerful to meditate on is your inner fullness being like the sun, and your freedom being like the sky. If when in meditation you imagine the fullness of your being as like a beautiful sun within your heart-space, surrounded by a clear, open sky, which is the natural freedom of your awareness. As you breathe in, feel your energy gathering into the fullness of the sun at your heart, feel the natural wholeness & completeness of it. As you breathe out, let go of tension in your body and thoughts in your mind, relaxing into the sky-like freedom of your own awareness.

If you work with this image, you may find that it helps you connect more profoundly and quickly to your natural state of freedom and fullness. If after a while you feel you have a real sense of the actual state of freedom and fullness, then you can drop the sun and sky image and simply rest in the experience of your natural freedom and fullness. If you find yourself loosing that sense, then you can return to the image as a way of re-connecting.

Another way of doing this is by positioning yourself in front of a window, or sitting outside or walking where you have clear sight of the actual sun and sky. You can use mindful awareness of the actual sun and sky as a way of connecting to freedom and fullness. As always, these things need to be done to be understood fully. Simply reading it on a page won’t reveal it’s potential!

Related article: Mindfulness – Liberation through pre-psychology

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

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Awareness and insight Inner vision Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Integrating Ego, Soul and Spirit Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Self-Leadership Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Intention determines trajectory – Aspects of mindful intention

“Your intention determines your trajectory – choose to be more conscious and intentional during the day. Life your life ‘on purpose’!”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article & video explores the concept that ‘intention determines trajectory’ & looks at practical ways you can start to explore it mindfully in your daily life.

If you enjoy the article, then do check out the upcoming course that will be starting in September on  Meditating with the power of intention.

In the spirit of the intentional, 

Toby

 

Watch Toby’s video on Mindful intention:


Article: Intention determines trajectory – Aspects of integrated mindful intention
 
Intention is one of what I call the ‘three pillars’ or ‘holy trinity’ of integral mindfulness: awareness, attention and intention. These three are what I call pre-skills, meaning skills that, if you develop them, they will help you to develop any other skill or capacity that you want to in life. The better you become at them, the more confident you will feel in the face of life’s challenges.
 
Intention determines trajectory
The statement ‘Intention is destiny’ might not be true in the absolute sense of the word, but it holds true on many levels in the sense that our intentions determine our motivations and actions in life. The intentions that we hold in our mind consistently are continually influencing what we do, where we go, what we say, what we choose. Its not difficult to see for example that someone who’s conscious intention is to contribute to society and make it a better place is going to have a very different life path from someone whose intention is simply to fit in with the prevailing norm, and not look too dumb. Given this understanding, the intention to make your intentions in life conscious is a good place to start!
 
You always have an intention
Something else about intention is that you always have one. It can be a conscious intention such as the intention to act to achieve a goal, or it can be an unconscious or instinctual intention, such as the impulse to eat an attractive food, or say something in a moment or reactivity. So, a second practice around intention is to start to notice and be mindful around the intentions that you are having thru-out the day. Notice them coming and going. Notice the ones that are deliberate. Notice intentions that you tend to hide from yourself, or suppress awareness around. “What is my intention for doing this?” is a question that helps you both to become aware of existing intentions, and for clarifying your intention, aligning yourself with the best intentions that you can muster.
 
Three levels or octaves of intention
Three ball park intentions that I practice on are simple and as follows:

  • The intention to be of benefit toward myself today
  • The intention to turn up well for my close circle, friends, family, colleagues
  • The intention (Partly by doing intentions 1&2 well) to be of benefit to humanity and the Planet

I call these ball park intentions, because they hold space well for the other more specific intentions that I may focus on in the day. They create a benevolent intentional space for my activities, and clarify the way in which I direct my energy. I often start a meditation with these three intentions, but they are equally important for:

  • Family interaction
  • Business transactions
  • Social activity

And so on…One thing to notice about these three levels is that we are aiming to create a harmonic between them, get them working together as a team. By benefiting myself I can become stronger, which helps me to turn up better for my close circle, and the enhanced interaction with my close circle ripples out into the world. You get the idea!

Practice points around mindful intention:

  • Be curious about the intentions, conscious and unconscious that you have during the day, witnessing them and noticing patterns
  • Choose to be more conscious and intentional during the day. Life your life ‘on purpose’!
  • Notice how your intentions determine your trajectory in life, both in the short, medium, and long terms
  • Generate and center around the three levels or octaves of intention regularly. Practice motivating yourself from these powerful, core intentions

Related reading: Intention, dedication, meditation
Fourteen levels of mindful intention

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

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Three levels of mindful intuition

“Teaming up our intuition & rationality helps us trust our natural inner guidance and signals”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article offers some ways of making distinctions around different type of intuition, & beginning to work with them in daily life. If you enjoy it, feel free to join us for the Tuesday or Wednesday meditation class, where it will be a focus point of the meditation. 

In the spirit of intuition,

Toby
 


Three levels of mindful intuition
 
What is intuition?
 
For this piece, I’m going to define intuition as a way of experiencing and processing our life in a way that is almost instantaneous, often pre, or trans-rational, meaning preceding logical or systematic thought. Here are a couple of mainstream definitions from the internet that are complementary to mine:

  • Oxford languages: Intuition – using or based on what one feels to be true even without conscious reasoning; instinctive; “his intuitive understanding of the readers’ real needs”
  • Cambridge dictionary: Intuition – able to know or understand something because of feelings rather than facts or proof

 
Why is it useful to develop?
 
Reliable intuition is a wonderful capacity to develop, as it enables us to navigate life confidently, experientially, and more successfully. It is a capacity that is complementary to our reasoning, and analytical capacity, rather than in competition with it. If we can make our intuition and reasoning a team, then they can help us to verify choices, navigate confusion and so forth. Teaming up our rationality and intuition helps us trust our natural inner guidance and signals.
 
Three levels of intuition
 
Most often I think about intuition as having three levels; instinctual, mental and spiritual:

Instinctual intuition comes from our biological intelligence. It is the capacity that we share with animals. It is pre-rational, often sensual and sensory. If you quieten the mind and attune to your body-intelligence, then you’ll start to notice this level of your intuition providing you signals and feedback thru-out the day. When you are out in nature, you may notice this level of intuition really coming to the foreground of your awareness, as your animal nature attunes to its environment.

Mental or intellectual intuition is the capacity of our mind to compute answers based on the sum total of our knowledge and experience, before our conscious mind can do it in a linear way. For example, if we are an experienced chess or tennis player, our intuitive sense of the next move or shot will often come intuitively and instantaneously. This ‘feeling’ comes from the capacity of our intellect to make trans-rational calculations based on the totality of our knowledge and experience in this domain.

Spiritual intuition is that dimension of our intelligence that lies beyond both our instinct and our intellect. The intuition that comes from this level is distinct, sometimes characterised as a ‘still small voice within’. In a previous article I describe this intuitive voice as follows:
“What you are looking for is a quieter voice within you coming from a deeper level of your consciousness. Its nature is to be kind, and quiet, strong and wise. It’s easily drowned out by the louder voices of the everyday mind, which is why you need to listen for it closely, in a relaxed frame of mind”
Sometimes referred to as the Higher Self, Soul Self or Spiritual Self, spiritual intuition often feels as if it’s perspective comes literally from an ariel point of view, a ‘big picture’ perspective.
 
If you sit quietly, and recall a particular situation in your life, you can try gently to identify these three voices, attuning to the different information and perspectives they are giving you. Sometimes they will be in broad agreement, sometimes they will be saying different, even contradictory things to each other. It is your job as the conscious self to:

  • Identify these three voices of your intuitive guidance
  • Collate and assess them together, making a decision that you feel is best for you and the situation at hand, all things considered

Identifying and listening to these three levels of your intuition is a part of what I call learning to trust your inner guidance, or ‘inner guru’. Everyone has all three of these, it’s just a matter of putting in a little patient practice to start building your competency!
 
Related articles: Trusting your inner guru
Four ways of working with your inner voice

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com
 


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Effortless wholeness – The ocean & it’s wave; not one, not two

“Experience yourself as a wave on the ocean, emerging from and subsiding back into the sea, separate from but at the same time one with the ocean, not one, not two”

Dear Toby, 

This week’s article focuses on a technique to deepen the simple feeling of awareness, making it into a communion between yourself as an individual, and yourself as the One or Universal Self. If you like it, you might like to come along too this week’s Wednesday class, where it will be the subject of the  session!

And head’s up for this Saturday 27th July, 5-6pm – Mantra yoga meditation class: Healing meditation with the Medicine Buddha. If you are interested in meditation & healing, you will enjoy this class.

In the spirit of not one, not two,

Toby

 


Effortless wholeness – The ocean & it’s wave; not one, not two
 
In my previous article, Mindfulness – Liberation through pre-psychology I outlined five ways in which simply sitting in a state of mindful presence starts to activate a feeling of wholeness or completeness. Sitting presently in this way we start to feel:
 

  1. Full, not empty
  2. Empty, not full 
  3. Enough, not not -enough 
  4. Strong, not weak 
  5. Free, not limited

 
To our ‘doing’ mind this can seem a little bit too good to be true, there must be something that we have to do or achieve in order to a state of deep meditation and get all these benefits? Here is a short story from Anthony De Mello’s One minute wisdom entitled ‘Identity’ that is designed to further undermine our addiction to striving:
 
IDENTITY
“How does one seek union with God?”
“The harder you seek, the more distance you create between Him and you.”
“So, what does one do about the distance?”
“Understand that it isn’t there.”
“Does that mean that God and I are one?”
“Not one. Not two.”
“How is that possible?”
“The sun and its light, the ocean and the wave, the singer and his song—not one. Not
two.”
 
The useful thing about this story is it helps us to see that we can be at the same time one with the universe, and at the same time different, individual and separate. It is not one, not two, not neither, not both & something beyond neither and both.
 
The story gives the image of the sun and its light, the ocean and the wave, and the singer and his/her song. To explore this, first cultivate basic mindful presence; not lost in thought, not falling asleep, present to the moment, and aware of yourself being present. Then take one of the following as your object of meditation:

  • Imagine yourself as an individual lightray, separate from but at the same time one with the sun. Not one, not two
  • Or as a wave on the ocean, emerging from and subsiding back into the sea, separate from but at the same time one with the ocean. Not one, not two
  • Or as a singer singing a song (perhaps when you actually sang a song), separate from, but at the same time merged with the sound and the song itself. Not one, not two

 
Using one of these images, explore relaxing as effortlessly as you can into the feeling of being not one with the universe, or separate from it, but paradoxically both at the same time. Intellectually it sounds a bit bamboozling, but experientially and using the image, you will find that the experience comes naturally, and without needing to try too hard. It is a nice way to enhance and deepen the simple feeling of awareness and mindful presence, making it into a communion between yourself as an individual, and yourself as the One or Universal Self!
 
Related reading: Mindfulness – Liberation through pre-psychology
Your thoughts as light rays, your mind as the sun
 

​© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


In case you missed it in last week’s newsletter: The remembrance, positivity & mindful questioning training page

This first training page for the Engaged mindfulness book & project focuses on three practices, or mindful positions:

  1. Practical learning from life – Asking & learning from mindful questions
  2. Meditation – orienting around the positive
  3. Mindfulness – improving your conscious remembrance of what you are doing

Reference in the Engaged mindfulness book: Page 4-6, An Introduction to the Art of Mindfulness (Download free PDF, or order hardcopy here)


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Mindfulness – Liberation through pre-psychology

“Mindful awareness builds a robust pre-psychological base, meaning the feeling or sensibility you have about yourself before you think or conceive who you are. If we get this base right, many good things follow”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article is on the effectiveness of minddful awareness as a pre-psychological base for navigating and thriving in our lives. If you enjoy it, feel free to join us for the Tuesday or Wednesday meditation class, where it will be a focus point of the meditation. 

In the spirit of awareness,

Toby


Mindfulness – Liberation through pre-psychology
 
In my previous article on the ‘holy trinity of mindfulness’ I outline the role of awareness, intention and attention in mindfulness practice. I describe them as pre-skills that, if you cultivate them will help you develop any other skill relatively quickly and easily.
In this article I want to focus on awareness and what I call its pre-psychological benefits. Again, in the previous article I define mindful awareness as:
“The choice to be consciously aware as we go through life, rather than unconscious, and to direct our conscious awareness skilfully.”
When you make the choice simply to be aware of consciousness in the present moment, there are several fundamental benefits. I want to outline some of these below, in the hope that you will feel inspired to start practicing. Specifically, I want to point out how mindful awareness builds a robust pre-psychological base for ourselves. By pre-psychological I mean the feeling or sensibility you have about yourself before you start to think or conceive who you are. If we get this base right, many good things follow!
 
Full, not empty – When we sit in awareness of the present moment, we start to feel a sense of fullness in that moment. We can then turn up to life with this feeling of fullness, which helps counterbalance the feeling of emptiness that many people feel when they think about themselves and their life.

Empty, not full – Sitting with awareness in the present moment enables us to empty of all the complex thinking and inner noise that our mind is overburdened or overfilled with. We access a sense of ‘empty’ pleasurable inner spaciousness.

Enough, not not -enough – The ‘I am not enough’ script is one of the most common ones that individuals suffer from psychologically. Training to be aware in the present gives us access to a feeling of enough-ness, a sensibility of sufficiency not insufficiency. We can learn to identify with this primary feeling, and meet life from this feeling of ‘enough’, which then becomes a sense of ‘I am enough’.

Strong, not weak – becoming more consciously aware and present leads to a sense of being more gathered and undistracted. Awareness itself is always in the present moment, so focusing upon it leads to less of our energy being dissipated by distraction and thoughts about the past or future. The result of this is a feeling or sensation of being strong in the moment, not weak, and of being centered, not off balance.

Free, not limited – In our mental and physical environment we experience all sorts of limitations,  some external, some internal. In the experience of awareness itself, there is absolute freedom. The choice to be aware is the one thing that no one can take away from us.
 
So, then the practice here is simply to practice being aware of awareness, in the present moment, noticing that when we do so a very basic primal set of pre-cognitive, non-verbal experiences become available to us. We have a sense of being:

  • Full, not empty
  • Empty, not full
  • Enough, not not -enough (sufficiency, not insufficiency)
  • Strong, not weak
  • Free, not limited

If we cultivate these, then we now have a range of pre-psychological, pre-thought building blocks that we can use as a secure base for our sense of self as we think and navigate the world from day to day. This sense of strength, fullness and freedom can accompany us more and more, as our capacity to be aware of awareness grows though our meditation and mindfulness practice.
 
Related reading: Awareness, attention, intention – The holy trinity of integral mindfulness
The freedom of awareness

​© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

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Mindful speech, inner chatter, inner power

“If it isn’t true, useful or funny, don’t say it! You can create your own guidelines for your mindful speech practice, but this one is a fun one to get started”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article is on the relationship between your inner power & mindful speech. If you enjoy it, feel free to join us for the Tuesday or Wednesday meditation class, where it will be the subject of the session. 

The workshop I am offering for July is the Psychic & Psychological Self-defense half-day WS, if you are interested in it, let me know and we can look for a time that works for all who want to attend. 

New events this month include the Engaged mindfulness class, and the mantra yoga meditation. both are online, click the links for full details.

In the spirit of mindful speech,

Toby


Mindful speech, inner chatter, inner power
 
Speech and your inner power
At a wedding a few years ago, I met a nun who had been one of my teachers back in the 90’s when I was a Buddhist monk. Asking here about her current practice, she said that she was really enjoying her mantra meditation practice, finding new insights and growth through it. She followed this up by saying that she thought that particularly these days, people dissipated the power of their speech by talking too much, and talking meaninglessly. I think this is worth reflecting upon. When you talk, it is essentially your mental, emotional, and physical energy combining to create the sound vibration. If you are talking too much, and without much meaning then essentially you are diluting your energy, your life-force and its power. Too much of this obviously isn’t great.
Of course, you can also speak meaningfully and powerfully in a way that grows your inner power, creates meaningful connection, and expresses authenticity. So, it’s not about simply speaking less, but speaking consciously and with meaning. Of course that meaning can also be playful, light, fun as well as serious, but not just mindless, impulsive babble!
 
Not just physically silent
The reason we often speak to much and without direction is because it reflects our mind. Our mind is busy talking all the time, full of inner chatter. If we simply don’t say things out loud, that doesn’t solve our energy dissipation problem, because we are still dissipating it through over-thinking! So, like our physical speech, a principle around our mind-chatter should also be something like ‘Think less, think better’.
 
Listening and watching
A good mindfulness practice for reducing your inner and outer chatter is simply to listen more. When you are with others, really try and listen to and make space for what they are saying, and what lies behind it. When you are with yourself, spend time mindfully observing your inner chatter, listening to it, rather than ‘being’ it. Let your energy gather into your inner-listener, rather than being dissipated by your inner chatter-box!
 
Noticing silence
If you practice mindful listening in this way, then amidst the noise, you’ll also start to notice the inner and outer silence. Amongst other things this silence is a place where you can gather your inner power and energy, centering it in the moment, rather than weakening it. Centering around silence means that when you do speak, you speak from your center, with power and purpose.
 
Other people’s chatter
All of the above are helped by editing the quality and amount of distraction you expose yourself to during your day. If you’re filling your mind with information from your phone, the internet, and social media, then it’s almost impossible to talk, listen or be silent mindfully. So, patches of non-doing in your day really help.
 
Below is a short anecdote from Anthony Del Mello’s ‘One minute wisdom’. If it isn’t true, useful or funny, don’t say it! You can create your own guidelines around mindful speech, but this one is a fun one to get started.
 
 
SPEECH
The disciple couldn’t wait to tell the Master the rumour he had heard in the
marketplace.
“Wait a minute,” said the Master, “What you plan to-tell us is it true?”
“I don’t think it is.”
“Is it useful?”
“No. it isn’t.”
“Is it funny?”
“No.”
“Then why should we be hearing it?”
 
Related reading: The way to silence

​© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Follow Toby on: LinkedIn, YouTube, Instagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Awareness and insight creative imagery Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

Integrating reality & symbolic reality

“Much of what we take for our reality are just mental symbols about reality. Reality itself is something different, something that must be experienced directly”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

There are two ways in which you can use the article below. The first is by reading it and using the example as a way of exploring it in meditation. The second is, having understood the basic idea simply ask yourself the question:

“What do I notice about the inter-relationship between my symbolic reality & reality itself?”

Then just watch your experience mindfully for a period of time & see what you start to notice.
 
Between this message and the article is the events list for June, starting with this weekend’s stress transformation workshop.
 
In the spirit of integration,

Toby

 

Meditation sessions & workshops with Toby in June: 


Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule
 

Saturday 8th June, 9.30am-12.30pm – Meditations for Transforming Negativity and Stress into Energy, Positivity and Enlightenment Workshop

Tues 18th/Weds 19th June – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Mindfulness for emotional intelligence masterclass – Saturday 22nd June, 10am-12noon

Starts Tues /Weds 25th & 26th June, 7.30-8.30pm – The Wisdom of Awakening Series:  Meditations for cultivating your inner guidance & guru

Article: Integrating reality & symbolic reality



 
Thinking – the manipulation of symbols
What is thinking really? There are several ways of answering this, I’d like to focus here on thinking as essentially a way of creating and manipulating symbols about our reality. Thinking is not reality itself, but arrangements of symbols representing reality. That’s worth reflecting upon, because when we do, we immediately start to realize that a lot of what we take for our reality is actually just thoughts, or symbols about reality. Reality itself is something different, something that must be experienced directly. This is a main point of meditation, to move beyond our mental symbols, encountering our reality directly, as it is. As the Zen saying goes, “Reality is not what you think!”
 
Integrating symbols & reality

Using symbols to think about reality can either be helpful for us to expand our sense reality, or it can narrow it. One way in which I like to work with mental models or symbols is to take 2-4 mental models of reality, and then cross-reference them. Each model reveals something different and complementary from the other models. When we put them together, you get a richer, more whole and integrated sense of what is be there.
 
A practice involving three models of reality

What I am going to do now is take three models of reality itself from a western religious, Hindu spiritual and Taoist philosophical perspective. Then I will describe how to put them together in a process of mindful enquiry into our experience of reality itself.
 
Model 1: Reality as hierarchical, God at the top, wo/man at the bottom – from a western Christian, (or Hebrew or Islamic) perspective, reality is a hierarchy with God/ Spirit at the top, and humans/earth at the bottom. Our relation to God is that of a servant to a King, and western/middle-eastern religion organizes and expresses itself accordingly. If you think about the Sistine chapel, God is on the roof, man is below (With only hell beneath!). This model can see archaic, but if you look at the way reality organizes itself, it is substantially hierarchical.
 
Model 2: Reality as a drama – in the Hindu & Buddhist model, the world is more like a drama. At the core of every living being is the One Self, or our Buddha Nature. Our outer appearances are like masks in a drama, each personality and aspect playing a role in a drama. Reality is seen as a play of the illusion created by spirit, for the entertainment of spirit.
 
Model 3: Reality as an organism – The Taoist model (the Tao is often described as “the way of nature’) is reality as more organismic in nature; no particular hierarchies, no one thing in charge of creating the rest. Reality is conceived as a network of interrelated parts, moving into and out of balance according to the principle of the Tao (the way) and of yin & yang.
 
So, if you consider each of these three models in turn, you’ll get a sense of the aspects of reality it is trying to describe. Crucially, none of these models are reality itself. Nor are any other approaches, scientific, artistic, sociological, economic etc…Reality is always itself, always a direct experience that we encounter each day.
If you sit quietly with each of these three symbolic representations of reality, cross referencing them with each other, and then with your actual experience of reality, you start to get a rich sense of the wholeness and integration between them, and the relationship between those symbols and reality itself.  If you take a ‘both/and’ rather than an ‘either/or’ approach, the reward is access to an overall sense of wholeness and integration in your life, one that helps us counter the often-pronounced sense of fragmentation and disconnect that characterizes our experience.
 
Related article: Mindfully enhancing your psychological development

 
Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Follow Toby on: LinkedIn, YouTube, Instagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology