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Dear Integral Meditators, 

This weeks article looks at mindfulness when brought to bear upon the most important activities in your life. If you enjoy it, we will be exploring it in this weeks Tuesday & Wednesday Meditation sessions. 

Heads up for the upcoming Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation on 19th & 20th March!

In the spirit of mindfulness,
 
Toby 

Mindful flow around the things that are most important
 
How mindfulness makes things better
Fundamentally, mindfulness is about being present to your life in a relaxed, focused manner. By being present in such a way, you create a ‘flow state’ where you can:

• Enjoy the present activity and derive fulfilment from it
• To more effective and wiser regarding your experience of any challenges being presented

By being relaxed, focused and present (as opposed to tense, anxious and reactionary), things essentially tend to get better and easier in a natural, unforced manner.
 
What to focus on in mindfulness?
The premise here is that, if you practice mindfulness around the most important things in your life, then they will get better. What are the most important things? Well, it depends upon the person, but since most of our time is spent in relationships and in work, then these two are very important to build your mindful flow capacity around. Here are a few pointers for how to do this:
 
Mindfulness around relationships
Sitting quietly, build a little bit of basic mindful flow around the breathing, by focusing your attention on the inbreath, then relaxing your body-mind on the outbreath. Now, bring your attention to an important relationship, perhaps your romantic partner, a family member or colleague. Picturing them in your mind’s eye, practice being mindful to what comes up as you are present to them:

• Notice the internal conversation that starts up within you
• The judgments
• The emotions and mood that settle in
• Times when you have states of blank, unknowing, ambiguity or confusion
• Particular memories of subjects that come up
• What does the content look like from your ‘I’ space? 
• What does the relationship look like from their ‘I’ space?
• What does the relationship look like from both of your ‘we’ space?

As you do this, you are not trying to fix or solve any of it, rather simply be present to all the material in a focused, relaxed manner. That is the only ‘goal’.
By being present in this way, as an observer, naturally your awareness of the relationship will increase. When you next meet the person, as you interact, practice bringing some of that mindful presence into your contact with them, be relaxed and lightly present as far as possible.
 
Mindfulness around work
Establish your basic mindful flow, then bring your attention to an important area of your work, or just your sense of work more generally. Picture the circumstances in your mind’s eye, practice being mindful to what comes up as you are present to it:

• Notice the internal conversation that starts up within you
• The judgments or anxieties
• The emotions and mood around the project
• Memories that surface persistently
• Times when you have states of blank, unknowing, ambiguity or confusion
• What does your work look like from your ‘I’ space?
• What does your work look like from other people’s perspectives?
• If someone were looking on as an observer, or ‘fly on the wall,’ what would they see?

 
As with relationships, you are not trying to fix or solve any of it, rather simply be present to all the material in a focused, relaxed manner. That is the only ‘goal’.
By being present in this way, as an observer, naturally your awareness of the relationship will increase. When you are next at work, practice brining some of that mindful presence into your tasks and interactions. Practice light, mindful attention to what you are doing.
 
If you practice these two exercises consistently, even for only a few minutes a day, you will notice your experience of relationships and of your work change in the manner that I outlined in the first two paragraphs. Sound too good to be true? Why not try it for a week and find out?!

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com
 

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Ongoing – Effortless effort – The art of doing by non-doing, a ten-week meditation course

Tues & Weds 19,20th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Saturday March 23rd, 9-11.30am – Integral meditation deep dive mini-retreat

Follow Toby on: LinkedIn, YouTube, Instagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

“Meditation polarities are like the wings of a bird. Just like a bird needs two wings, not one to fly, to make significant progress in meditation we need these functional pairs”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

Meditation polarities are a key to good meditation technique, get them right and a lot of good things follow. If you enjoy the article, then you might consider my January course on Effortless effort, which integrates these principles.

This week’s Tues & Wednesday class are on the subject of ‘Mindfully healing sadness, guilt & anger’, all welcome, live or online. 

In the spirit of wings, 
 
Toby

Meditation wings – Five foundational meditation polarities
 
Here are five pairs of qualities that you build over time in meditation. Put some working experience of all of them together and you are on your way to meditation mastery. Each pair is like the wings of a bird. Just like a bird needs two wings, not one to fly, to make significant progress in meditation we need these functional pairs.
 
1. Not lost in thought, not asleep
 
This first one gives you your basic state of meditative presence, which then acts as the basis of all other levels and types of meditation. As a beginner you try and anchor your attention to an object in the present moment, and sustain awareness of it, without getting lost in thought, and without falling asleep. It is this the state of ‘presence’ which you then place all your other meditations.
 
2. Balancing relaxation & focus
 
On the level of the physical body and the everyday mind, we build the power of our mindful concentration by combining a degree of focus with a degree of relaxation. If relaxation to the point of sleep is a zero, and total effortful focus is a ten, we are trying to sustain somewhere in between a 4-6 range. This creates a ‘mindful flow state’ that we can use daily and build upon in meditation to go deeper in our formal practice.
 
3. Warmth & space
 
Once we can stabilize a degree of mindful flow, we then start to notice that our consciousness itself has two basic qualities; a natural warmth, and a sense of space. This ‘warmth’ is the basis of our natural love and compassion, which we can focus upon ourself or others, it is a bit like the sun. The ‘space’ element is like the sky, open, spacious, naturally calm. Meditating on your inner warmth and space feels both healing and gently energizing.
 
4. Compassion & wisdom
 
The natural warmth of our consciousness them becomes the basis of our love and compassion. We can meditate to expand our compassion from self-compassion, to compassion for others we know, to compassion for all humans, to all creatures universally. Correspondingly the natural space of our consciousness acts as the basis for increasing levels of objective wisdom and insight. This has both an everyday dimension, and an ‘ultimate’ dimension, meaning it provides insights into the absolute nature of reality itself.
 
5. Bliss & emptiness
 
On the deeper levels of meditation, wisdom and compassion are experienced as a primal bliss and unitive, formless emptiness. Over time these merge together to form a singularity or non-dual state. In tantric practice for example this state is cultivated explicitly to accelerate the profundity and power of our meditation to erode our egoic conditioning and accelerate our identification with our own naturally awakened nature.  
 
So, the list above is kind of hierarchical, from basic beginners to more advanced, and the advanced levels depend upon the basic levels for their mature growth. The basic levels are integrated into the upper levels, but they also become a part of our everyday enjoyment. For example, the mindful flow of level two is a basic tool for me to use while writing this article, and the warmth and space of level three are everyday ways that I keep myself company in a balanced manner.
 


In case you missed last week’s article: Evolutionary or devolutionary mindfulness?


Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2023. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com 

Follow Toby on: LinkedIn, YouTube, Instagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

“The bright child is that part of us that is ever young, ever new, ever creative, ever both innocent and wise, whose light helps us begin again each time we burn out.”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article explores the space between the psychological and the spiritual dimensions or our psyche, particularly with reference to our child-self. If you enjoy it, this weeks Tuesday & Wednesday meditation class will integrate this subject into the session, and the Masterclass on 9th December is focused on Working with your bright shadow. 
The Integral Meditation Two Day Retreat at the end of this month is implicitly a deep dive into the state of the ‘Spiritual Child’ mentioned in the article.
 
In the spirit of the Bright Child,
 
Toby

Meditating on the Bright Child within you
 
Normally when we think of inner child work, we think of the psychological level of things; ‘healing’ our wounded inner child, recovering the playfulness we had as a child but forgot, and so on. Psychological practices like this refer to the child-in-time that we were, meaning:
‘The historical child, that is the child within us whose character has been shaped and informed by our own literal historical upbringing; experience with parents, peers, and other significant others, what happened to us in school, how we were treated and learned to gain approval and so on. The child within us now that is a product of our personal historical experience, and our response to that.’ (see my previous article on ‘Meditating with the child self’)
The below here offers a complementary practise, where the focus is on connecting to our Spiritual, and Archetypal/Soul level or ‘Bright child’.
 
Your ‘Spiritual Child’
You might call your Spiritual Child the ‘Eternal’ or ‘Ever-New’ Self. It is our essential nature, outside of the world of form and time. You can find it in meditation in the following way:
Observing your field of consciousness, notice three domains:

• Firstly, your body and senses in time and space, gradually getting older.
• Secondly, your mind and thoughts, also thinking and feeling according to your unfolding story in time and space, as you (as a body-mind) get older.
• Thirdly, there is consciousness itself, and the ‘simple feeling of being’ that it gives rise to. This experience is formless, timeless and ever-new, arising pristine and bright in each moment.

This third domain of consciousness itself, and the simple feeling of being, is what we are referring to as our ever-young, ‘Spiritual Child’. To meditate on the simple feeling of being is to connect, and to be fed and renewed by our inner Spiritual Child. This is a meditation we can do and continue to deepen over a lifetime.
 
Your Archetypal, or ‘Bright Child’
Having connected to your Spiritual Child as above, you can then set an intention to meet your ‘Soul-level’ child, or bright child. You can do this through visualization. If you imagine yourself in a landscape, and then imagine your ‘Bright child’ comes to meet you. S/he would look very much like yourself as a young child, but when you see her, you see that she is bright, beautiful, happy, untouched by your past traumas as an historical child. As I mention in my child-self article, the bright child is “That part of us that is ever young, ever new, ever creative, ever both innocent and wise, whose light helps us begin again each time we burn out.”
When you spend time with her you can:

• Observe the states of mind, perspectives & somatic sensations that arise when you are in contact with her
• Talk to her and troubleshoot challenges you have in your life, as well as derive inspiration
• Practice being her, now, and embodying her energy

 
These practices are great to do as meditations by themselves, but they are also valuable to do in combination with the often-difficult work of healing our historical inner-child of their past wounds and burdens from this life. Contacting the wounded child in the context of knowing the child within you that is already in perfect health makes it much easier to face the pain, and less arduous.
 
Related articles:  Meditating with the child self
Your shadow child
Progressively recovering your joie de vivre (Meditating with your inner child)

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2023. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com  

In case you missed it: The body is in you – How to go into deep meditation quickly
 
The deepest level of meditation is what is known as Non-Dual meditation. It is the state of meditation where, essentially the subject-object divide within consciousness collapses into ‘One Taste’ or the simple, essential unity of being.
One way to achieve this is what you might call ‘progressive witnessing’, where you realize that you are not any of the objects in your consciousness, rather you are the witness of them. You do this until you realize the Essential I, the I-I, the pure consciousness that is the witness. It would go something like this…read full article

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Follow Toby on: LinkedIn, YouTube, Instagram

“Once we can focus our mind in meditation, we can then skilfully think and move our attention creatively in that space without disturbing our concentration. This in turn leads to unusual and supra-normal levels of insight and creativity”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This weeks article looks at how to work creatively in meditation. As an artist myself (originally), its a subject central to my experience of meditation, and one that makes it almost infinitely enjoyable and regenerative!
If you enjoy it then do consider joining us for this weeks Tuesday & Wednesday evening meditations, where we shall be integrating a creative dimension to our meditation practice. 

My monthly Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat on 25th February is now full, waiting list only. I have added an extra session on Sunday the 26th for those who may want to participate

In the spirit of our inner artist, 

Toby 

The fish swimming in the pond: Meditation & creative contemplation

Meditation & contemplation
Back when I began meditating in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition, I was taught that meditation has two parts; contemplation and meditation. Initially you have to contemplate in order to ‘seek and find’ your object of meditation. Once you have found it you can them simply let your attention focus upon it and go deeper into it. For example:

• Before doing breathing meditation you have to seek and find the sensation of your breathing
• Before meditating on compassion, you have to assemble in your minds eye the objects of compassion (EG: other particular people) and find the feeling of compassion within yourself
• Before you can hold a visualization in meditation, you first have to build the different components of the visualization in a contemplation

Active & creative meditation – Moving your mind in a meditative state
Over time I have also increasingly used meditation as a point of departure for creative contemplation. Thinking in a meditative state I have found creates a very different experience of how things are.
To give an example, if I am anxious and stressed, often the way in which I think about my life will often be anxious and stressed. If I move into a state of meditation on say my beginners mind or compassion, and re-consider my life from there, the compassionate state of mind will create a very different view and experience from my stressed and anxious state.
From this we can start to understand how our meditative states are creative; they paint a picture of our life that is different from our everyday mind.
As well as painting a different picture in the way described above, our meditative states can often ‘plug us in’ to ideas and inspirations from a deeper level of our own consciousness, and a deeper level of the collective group consciousness. We find ourself tapping into levels of inner reality where there is an abundance of, often spontaneous creative ideas.  

The fish in the pond: Skilful creative contemplation
Initially when we meditate it can feel difficult enough to just calm our mind to focus upon and hold an object of meditation. To move back into creative contemplation often results in us just becoming distracted again. But if we keep practising then we learn to contemplate creatively in meditation whilst at the same time not disturbing our inner stillness and focus.
Again speaking of my Tibetan Buddhist days, this was illustrated by the image of a small fish swimming beneath the surface of a pond without disturbing the surface. Similarly, once we can focus our mind in meditation, we can then skilfully think and move our attention creatively in that space without disturbing our concentration. This in turn leads to unusual and supra-normal levels of insight and creativity.
Now, this may sound like a long way from where you are currently, but one way to get better at this fast is simply to practice it regularly. A simple structure might look like this. In a fifteen-minute meditation:

• Spend five minutes calming your mind and finding your meditation object, for example the breathing or compassion
• The next five minutes focus on deepening your attention on your chosen object
• For the final five minutes bring to mind a domain of your life that you want to think creatively about. Staying relaxed and present within your meditative state, contemplate your chosen domain and see what ideas, perspectives and insights come to light

You might say this is a way of using meditation to capitalize on our natural creativity, and allowing it to flourish in the deeper, more free space of our focused awareness.

Related articles: Still water that moves – Meditation for greater creativity
Mindfulness for enhancing productivity & creativity in your work
On boredom, creativity & ‘mindful fishing’

© Toby Ouvry 2023, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Ongoing – Introduction to Integral Meditation & Mindfulness Practice – An eight-week course

Saturday & Sunday February 26/27th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Tues 21st & Weds 22nd March, 7.30-8.30pm – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Sat & Sunday 1st, 2nd April – Two day integral meditation retreat
 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Starts Tues /Weds 23/24th November – The Wisdom of Awakening Series: Meditations for bringing integration, depth & vividness to your life

Overview: The Wisdom of Awakening series looks at different ways to ‘wake up’ and live your life fully and playfully through meditation. The premise of the sessions is that inner wholeness and wisdom are not something that are far away, rather they are something that we can awaken to ‘instantly’ through certain types of mindful attention…read full details

Saturday December 10th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Session overview: These 2.5hour Zen ‘mini-retreats’ are a chance to go into much deeper meditation states than you would be able to in your own personal daily practice, or even if you came to a one-hour class. Using sitting meditation methods in combination with breathing techniques and gentle stretching/mobility exercises Toby will guide you into deep meditative flow states that create the experience of a calm, unified, harmonized, resilient body, mind & heart.. read full details

Saturday December 17th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Experience unique Qi gong and Taoist breathing techniques to improve your immune system, energy level, psychological wellness and enhance your meditation.

In this mini-retreat and clinic: Toby will lead a series of practices over two hours.

• The first hour will focus on yang/dynamic movement and breathing forms for creating energy and removing blockages.
• The second hour focuses more upon gentler, yin forms designed to increase harmony in the body-mind, stimulating physical recovery and inner peace

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby
 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

• Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
• Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
• Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
• Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tues /Weds 23/24th November – The Wisdom of Awakening Series: Meditations for bringing integration, depth & vividness to your life

Saturday December 10th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Saturday December 17th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Wednesday Dec 21st, 7.30-8.30pm – Free Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation (Online only)

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

“The bones also sit in the structural center of many parts of our body. By focusing on the bones, you are really allowing your awareness to penetrate into the core of your physical being, and by doing so the energy of your life-force will follow“

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article is a method to strengthen your bones, and why bone health is important. If you enjoy it this Saturday 24th we have the Monthly Qi gong & Taoist Breathwork clinic & retreat, where we will be working with the bones, the heart and the kidney Qi in particular.

The subject of  this weeks Tuesday & Wednesday meditation class, is the Autumn Equinox balancing & renewing meditation,  a special meditation for this time of year.

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby
 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

• Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
• Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
• Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
• Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tues 16^th /Weds 17^th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Tues & Weds 20th/21st  September – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation

Saturday September 24th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Saturday October  8th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreat

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology