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creative imagery Energy Meditation Enlightened love and loving Inner vision Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Motivation and scope

Cultivating your positive imperfectionist

Even when inactive our positive imperfectionist is a benevolent and supportive feeling/atmosphere in our psyche, encouraging us to get stuck in to the activities that we feel motivated around and not to live in fear of trying”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores some ways to begin freeing yourself from the ‘negative perfectionist, with the help of a new friend, the ‘Positive Imperfectionist’. Quite a lot of my coaching work with people relates to this area. With your PI in place it becomes surprisingly possible to do difficult and very worthwhile things. I hope you enjoy it! If you do, then then this weeks Tuesday & Wednesday class will be focused on this subject. You are welcome to join us, live or online!

Next week sees the beginning of the final class series of the year: Tues /Weds 23/24th November – The Wisdom of Awakening Series: Meditations for bringing integration, depth & vividness to your life , do check it out!

In the spirit of positive-imperfectionism,

Toby


Cultivating your positive imperfectionist

The prevalence of negative perfectionism
If you have been around any kind of inner-development circles; meditation groups, psychotherapy, coaching etc, one of the phenomena that you may have come across will be the ‘negative perfectionist’. This is a part of many people’s psyche that is obsessed with doing things ‘correctly’ or flawlessly. This part of us is also very inclined to judge us quickly and harshly for any perceived failures flaws of mistakes that we make in our life. There are different forms of uncomfortable and sometimes excruciating psychological pain that it subjects us to as it points out the stupidity of our actions, the inappropriate things that we said, the things we could and should have done better. Even when inactive, it lives within our awareness as an ever-present threat, causing us to live in fear and discouraging us from doing things that be ‘risky’, might go wrong or otherwise expose our imperfection and how generally inadequate we are (!)

Some of the narratives of the negative perfectionist:

  • If you can’t do it right first time you may as well give up
  • You are your actions, if you mess one or more up, you are an idiot
  • People around you are judging you just as harshly as I (the negative perfectionist) am judging you, look how stupid you are making us look!
  • You are guilty until proven innocent, I’m expecting you to mess this up somehow
  • Why do you always find something for me to dislike about you
  • Don’t expose yourself to risk, better to hide than to fail
  • No matter what you achieve, it will never be enough for me
  • You are neither likable nor competent
  • You are isolated and alone

Do any of these sound familiar?

Your positive imperfectionist
For most people then it is well worth cultivating your positive imperfectionist. This is the inner voice within you that is ok with messy and imperfect. It encourages incremental improvement. It urges us to keep going even if we are not very good at something to begin with. It is forgiving and light, and quick to point out progress or improvement we make. It sees the value in failure, and sees mistakes as learning opportunities. Even when inactive it is a benevolent and supportive feeling/atmosphere in our psyche, encouraging us to get stuck in to the activities that we feel motivated around

Working on the narratives of the positive imperfectionist

  • If at first you don’t succeed, try again, having learned from the last attempt
  • You are not your actions, your fundamental value is secure
  • You have friends and encouragers around you, listen to them, feel supported
  • You are innocent until proven guilty! You are accountable for your actions, but don’t think failing sometimes makes you weak!
  • I believe in you
  • Keep trying, no risk no reward
  • You are already enough, try and see how much more you become
  • You are likeable
  • You are not alone

Any one of this last set of sentences can be an object of meditation. Internalizing them one by one will help you recognize and consolidate the voice of your positive imperfectionist. What are you waiting for?

Related articlesMindful Optimism

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

 


Starts Tues /Weds 23/24th November – The Wisdom of Awakening Series: Meditations for bringing integration, depth & vividness to your life

Dates and titles:
Tues 23/Weds24th November, Class 1
 – Everyday depth: being in the world but not of the world
Tues 6/Weds 7th November, Class 2 – Going within: The cave of the heart
Tues 13/Weds 14th June, Class 3  The experiential self: Meditation, vividness, charisma, ego
Read full details


Saturday November 26th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat
In a sentence: Experience unique Qi gong and Taoist breathing techniques to improve your immune system, energy level, psychological wellness and enhance your meditation…read full details



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Ongoing – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Saturday November 12th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Starts Tues /Weds 23/24th November – The Wisdom of Awakening Series: Meditations for bringing integration, depth & vividness to your life

Saturday November 26th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Awareness and insight creative imagery Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Presence and being present

Three Simple Creative Awareness Forms

“One of the things that we learn when we take up meditation is to appreciate how pleasurable the simple act of awareness can be”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This article explores three ways of stimulating your capacity for meditative awareness. They are practices in themselves, or they can be practiced together in combination.
If you enjoy them, the practices will be a part of this Tuesday and Wednesdays’ meditation class, you’d be welcome to join us, live or online.

Final call for this weekend’s Shamanic meditation workshop!

In the spirit of the pleasure of awareness,

Toby

 


 

Three Simple Creative Awareness Forms

Here are three simple meditation forms that you can do anytime, either as a short 1-5 minute practice in a spare moment, or as a longer meditations when you have more time.

1. Developing appreciation of simple awareness.
One of the things that we learn to appreciate when we take up meditation is to appreciate how pleasurable the simple act of awareness can be.
Take a minute now and just allow your mind to rest on an object. It could be the sounds as they come and go in the moment, or the play of the light across the landscape or cityscape as you look out of the window. Just allow your awareness to rest on that single area for as long as you want. As you do so, feel your mind and body moving into a state of rest and regeneration. Feel how pleasant the simple experience of relaxed, open awareness is.

2. Observing yourself in the third person
We habitually view our daily life and the events that happen in it in a first person, subjective manner. This awareness exercise offers another perspective on our life that we can work on integrating.
Sitting down, imagine that, rather than seeing life through the eyes of your physical body, imagine that you are outside your body, maybe two or three meters away observing yourself. Recall the events of the last 24 hours, and mentally see yourself engaging in your activities. As you observe yourself, you may find that feelings and emotions come up. If so, that is fine, just allow them to. The thing that you want to try and avoid as you are watching yourself is to start analyzing it or making judgements about what you are seeing. Simply be an objective observer and try and experience as fully as possible what it is like to be free from an obsessive first person experience of your life.

3. Finding your inner light by relaxing into the darkness of your mind.
Relax your mind as much as possible, as if you are falling asleep. Allow your awareness to be enveloped by the deep, silky darkness that is normally experienced as you start to drift into unconscious slumber. The key here is to ALMOST fall asleep, but NOT to actually fall asleep! Keep a part of your mind alert and awake as the main part of your mind and body relaxes deeply.
Think of the darkness that you experience as you are relaxing in this way as being like the darkness that a baby experiences in the mother’s womb, or like the darkness of deep night when we are all asleep. Rest in this darkness as fully as you can without losing that small element of aawakeness!
After a while imagine that you sense within the darkness a point of light. A little bit like the first rays of sun as it is still beneath the horizon at dawn. Focus on this point of light and allow it to become gradually stronger and more pervasive, like the rays of the sun spilling across the horizon as it rises. Gradually, without trying too hard, let the inner light within your mind begin to fill the darkness until your mind feels bright and radiant like a morning sun.
The key with this exercise is to relax as fully into the darkness before you attempt to find the light, and not to try too hard to find the light. If you relax deeply into the darkness, the light will actually start to emerge in its own time. However, you can stimulate it a little bit by imagining the point of light emerging from the darkness as described above.

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreatLearn how to practice the fundamentals of the most ancient meditation tradition on the planet in a clear, practical and concise manner, and understand its relevance and value to you and the challenges that you face in your life.

The workshop will give an overview and introduce some simple but profound shamanic practices on day one, with a deeper dive into Shamanic meditation practices on day two…read full details

 


Tues & Weds 25th/26th October, 7.30pm – Deepavali Meditation – Connecting to your inner light

About the class: Deepavali is traditionally (amongst other things) the annual celebration in the Hindu Calendar of the triumph of the light ever the darkness, of good over evil. In this session we will be taking some time to connect to our own ‘inner light’ in meditation, as a way of conquering the ‘darkness’ of our own inner confusion and fear….read full details


 

Saturday September 24th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

In a sentence: Experience unique Qi gong and Taoist breathing techniques to improve your immune system, energy level, psychological wellness and enhance your meditation…read full details

 



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Ongoing – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreat

Tues & Weds 25th/26th October, 7.30pm – Deepavali Meditation – Connecting to your inner light

Saturday October 29th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Tues 1st & Weds 2nd November, 7.30pm – Samhain Meditation (Live & Online) – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Inner vision Insight Meditation Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Presence and being present

Inner listening – Three levels of meditating on silence

“The nice thing about the above meditation is also that it can be done without having to exert much effort; it’s all listening, accepting, opening to. It can be done when you are tired and want to relax, as well as when you want to sit down and really do some focused inner work”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores how you can access and enjoy silence progressively and without too much effort. It’s partly the subject of  this weeks Tuesday & Wednesday meditation class,  it’ll be a fun one, and your welcome to join is either live or online.

Beneath the article you an find full details of all classes and workshops for October, do have a browse, it’s a full line up!

In the spirit of  silence amongst the noise,

Toby


Inner listening – Three levels of meditating on silence

Cultivating silent presence is not by any means the only way to meditate, but nevertheless it is a super important dimension of meditation. It is also one that, once you can do it, helps all your other forms of meditation as well as being an end in itself. Here are three ways to meditate on silence, the first is a doorway to the second, and the second is a doorway to the third. For the first two there are two ways to do it; listening inwardly and listening outwardly. They can be combined or focused on separately in any given session, as you wish.

Listening and observing the non-silence
The first practice is to listen to the non-silence or the noise.
On the inner level – As you turn your attention inward, this means to notice your inner conversation, and all the other ‘noise’ that is going on inside your mind, just holding the position of the observer in that space. You don’t try and stop the thoughts, rather you simply listen and notice.
On the outer level – You simply listen to the sounds going on around you, noticing them, and letting them come and go. Like the inner level the key is simply listening and noticing, and letting that be your point of stability as the sounds come and go.

Listening and observing the silence
If you listen to your inner noise in the way described above, then after a while you will notice that it starts to die down a little. Listening inwardly, you will start to notice pockets of silence between the noise. When these start to happen, pay attention to them and start to drop into them, extending the duration of them a little. Over time you will start to have more silence than inner noise. Eventually you’ll start to experience extended periods where it is almost all silence, and you drop into deeper and deeper states of meditation.
On the outer level, you can choose to focus on the silences in between the noises. After a while you will start to notice that silence is all pervasive; even when there is noise, you realize that the noise is contained by silence; that silence is present even when there are sounds around.

Listening to the sound of silence     
Once you have some experience of stages one and two, you will have probably started to notice that, when you listen to silence, both inwardly and outwardly, there is a sound. It’s kind of like a high-pitched ringing in your inner ear. If you relax with it, you may find that it makes it easier to let go of discursive thoughts and move into a thoughtless condition. Listening to the sound of silence almost puts you in a trance-like state that is very conducive to meditation and moving into deeper, non-conceptual states of awareness. On this third level the inner and outer dimension of the listening pretty much merge into the same thing, as the sound seems both ‘inside’ and ‘outside’ at the same time.

The nice thing about the above meditation is also that it can be done without having to exert much effort; it’s all listening, accepting, opening to. It can be done when you are tired and want to relax, as well as when you want to sit down and really do some focused inner work!

Related articles:

Inner sensitivity – Listening to yourself

The way to silence

Meditating on the Sound of Silence

Four ways of working with your inner voice

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreatLearn how to practice the fundamentals of the most ancient meditation tradition on the planet in a clear, practical and concise manner, and understand its relevance and value to you and the challenges that you face in your life.

The workshop will give an overview and introduce some simple but profound shamanic practices on day one, with a deeper dive into Shamanic meditation practices on day two…read full details

 


Saturday October  8th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Session overview: These 2.5hour Zen ‘mini-retreats’ are a chance to go into much deeper meditation states than you would be able to in your own personal daily practice, or even if you came to a one-hour class. Using sitting meditation methods in combination with breathing techniques and gentle stretching/mobility exercises Toby will guide you into deep meditative flow states that create the experience of a calm, unified, harmonized, resilient body, mind & heart.. read full details



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Saturday October  8th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreat

Tues & Weds 25th/26th October, 7.30pm – Deepavali Meditation – Connecting to your inner light

Saturday October 29th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Tues 1st & Weds 2nd November, 7.30pm – Samhain Meditation (Live & Online) – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Concentration Energy Meditation Enlightened Flow Inner vision Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Mindfulness, productivity, self-regulation & the 85% rule

Mindfulness in its pure form is essentially enhanced reality orientation. It involves involves specific forms of attentional & awareness practices that are designed to release our natural intelligence & our potential for experiential learning in the moment

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article essentially points out how mindfulness and productivity go together to help you enjoy your life and realize your goals, or to go from coping to thriving, I hope you enjoy it!

In the spirit of  enhanced reality orientation,

Toby

 

 

 

 


Mindfulness, productivity, self-regulation & the 85% rule

Basic reality orientation – Coping well enough to perform
In order to hold down a job, or maintain a harmonious social and family existence we all need a degree of mindfulness. We all need to be taking social cues, focusing on our work, and making appropriate adjustments well enough to do these things acceptably. Failure to meet our reality with this basic level of mindfulness would lead to:

  • Inability to hold down a job
  • Lack of stable relationships
  • Continuous instability within the family unit
  • Being considered unstable and even ‘insane’ by the conventional measures by which it is assessed in society

Enhanced reality orientation – Moving from coping to thriving
Mindfulness in its pure form is essentially enhanced reality orientation. It involves  specific forms of attentional & awareness practices that are designed to release our natural intelligence & our potential for experiential learning in the moment.

  • By paying attention in a high-quality manner to our work we can be more successful at it without necessarily working harder (aka working smarter)
  • In our leadership and relationship life we can create high functioning interactions that lead to great teams and stable friendships
  • We can learn to pick up on inner cues and signals from our body-mind, and learn to regulate our energy in a way where we feel well and thriving not just in the short term, but in the medium and long term.

With the students that attend my mindfulness sessions at INSEAD, one of the things that I am trying to teach them is how to arrive at 50years old (my age) from where they are (30+) in a way where they feel they have energy, enthusiasm and are ready to leap into the next life-project. This is as opposed to what they see in may of their seniors who are exhausted, stressed out and cynical. To do this they (and you!) need to self-regulate effectively. Below is a simple exercise around the 85% rule that is one example of this.

The 85% rule
This rule basically states that, if you are 85% exhausted, and then you stop and rest, your body-mind will recover reasonably fast and you can then continue where you left off. If you go substantially beyond the 85%, you move your energy levels move more and more ‘into the red’. Moving beyond 85% means that you really are exhausted, and it takes a much longer time to recover effectively from that type or level of exhaustion. So, in this practice the object of mindful self-regulation is to not go beyond 85% exhausted in any given activity in your work or life. By doing this you can actually become more productive in the medium to long term and in a way that is sustainable and enjoyable. The key here is:

  1. To know what the signs that you are approaching the 85% marker are
  2. To recognize and accept those signs
  3. To stop what you are doing and focus on the (enjoyable) discipline of recovery
  4. Recognizing the signs of recovery, and getting back to it with enthusiasm!

If you can do this then this simple way of orienting yourself mindfully around the reality of your energy levels gives you one of the keys to mindful thriving and productivity.
What are your own personal inner signs for points 1-4 above? How can you start orienting yourself around these signs mindfully today and begin plotting your own path of mindful thriving?

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreatLearn how to practice the fundamentals of the most ancient meditation tradition on the planet in a clear, practical and concise manner, and understand its relevance and value to you and the challenges that you face in your life.

The workshop will give an overview and introduce some simple but profound shamanic practices on day one, with a deeper dive into Shamanic meditation practices on day two…read full details

 



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Saturday October  8th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreat


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Energy Meditation Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditation and Art meditation and creativity Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience

The spectrum of mindful freedom and limitation

“If I understand freedom of awareness then gives freedom of choice, then I understand that I myself and am the creative agent that lies between the freedom of my awareness, and the current limitation of my life”

Dear Integral Meditators,

One of the great pleasures of meditation is the discovery that, wherever you are and whatever else is going on in your life, by sitting in a state of relaxed awareness you can be free, absolutely free, even if it is only for a few  seconds. This weeks article explores how to enjoy your freedom creatively, even amidst the apparently ‘fixed’ limitations of your life….

In the spirit of  inspiration while working,

Toby


The spectrum of mindful freedom and limitation

The freedom and joy of awareness
One of the great pleasures of meditation is the discovery that, wherever you are and whatever else is going on in your life, by sitting in a state of relaxed awareness you can be free, absolutely free, even if it is only for ten seconds. Of course, when you build your competency, you can drop into this space of freedom for much longer than 10 seconds. It can be extended into minutes and even hours. In the longer term it leads to the realization that, on the level of awareness itself we are absolutely free, even (and especially) when we are surrounded by limitations in our life.

The freedom of choice
The freedom of awareness then gives rise to a second freedom, the knowledge and capability to choose our attitude to life, as per the famous Viktor Frankl quote:
We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
By developing stable freedom of awareness, we can then remain free, even under pressure, to choose our attitude to what is happening to and around us. By taking responsibility for our choices we then generate the power to create our experience, by choosing our attitude to what is, and proceeding from there.

The daily path of necessary and appropriate limitation
So of course, in daily life we operate within the context of limitation and non-freedom. By choosing one career I sacrifice many other career paths. By choosing a partner I forgoe an indefinite number of other possible relationships. I operate within a finite body that is ageing. Initially this can look almost antagonistic toward the freedom of awareness, but if we understand freedom of awareness then gives freedom of choice, then I understand that I myself and am the creative agent that lies between the freedom of my awareness, and the limitation of my life.

The birth of creativity between these two
We can then start to see ourselves as artists whose life is a creative act; Our inherent freedom of awareness dancing with the inherent limitation of our life. From these two we sculpt our own work of art; the limitation giving shape and form to the absolute freedom of awareness itself. Our lives are always a combination of different fortunes and misfortunes, sufferings and joys. Whatever that combination, if we are willing to experience the freedom of our awareness each day, and then own our choices, we can create our own work of art from whatever limitations we have to operate in.

Meditating on the freedom of awareness
You can begin practising the dance of freedom and limitation in your own life by:

  1. Sitting and acclimatizing to the freedom of awareness in meditation. As the quote from the Warriors Creed goes: “I have no freedom : I make awareness my freedom”.
  2. Build a healthy acceptance and if possible, appreciation of the limitations that exist in your life.
  3. With a sense of your freedom of your awareness, and reflecting on the power of your freedom to choose your attitude to a challenge in your life, ask yourself “What is the most creative use of my freedom to create something beautiful from my current limitation?”
© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Saturday September 24th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

In a sentence: Experience unique Qi gong and Taoist breathing techniques to improve your immune system, energy level, psychological wellness and enhance your meditation…read full details


Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreatLearn how to practice the fundamentals of the most ancient meditation tradition on the planet in a clear, practical and concise manner, and understand its relevance and value to you and the challenges that you face in your life.

The workshop will give an overview and introduce some simple but profound shamanic practices on day one, with a deeper dive into Shamanic meditation practices on day two…read full details



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Saturday September 24th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Saturday October  8th, 9.30-12noon –  Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Sat & Sun 22nd/23rd October – Shamanic meditation workshop retreat


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Why am I doing this? Mindfully self-regulating your energy

“Mindful self-regulation. When you are about to engage in an activity or a meditation, it’s good to be clear about which mode you are going to be in, and what the objective is. Are you trying to achieve something but expend energy, or trying to restore energy, or something that is a bit of both?”

Dear Integral Meditators,

Too much output of energy without enough input leads to a burnout. This weeks article explores how to start regulating your energy levels and manage them better by being more mindful.
The subject of the article is also the subject of  this weeks Tuesday & Wednesday meditation class, if you enjoy the article, then do feel free to join us either online or live!

In the spirit of  self-regulation,

Toby

 


Why am I doing this? Mindfully self-regulating your energy

There are three types of activity essentially:

  1. Energy expending – Where you are doing an activity that involves expending energy in order to achieve something
  2. Restorative – When you are doing something relaxing in order to regenerate and build your energy
  3. Net neutral – When you are doing something that is both taking a moderate amount of effort, but also giving back some energy to you in some way, so maybe you might say it is a ‘net neutral’ activity

In any given day, you want to be monitoring these so that, overall you are doing enough restorative activities to not run out of energy. Too many days (running into weeks, months and years) of energy expending without recharging essentially leads to burnout.
This is also true for your meditation

  • You can do meditations that involve visualization, emotion and thought that are actually quite hard work, but that lead to an achievement or capability. This type of meditation takes effort and energy
  • There are some meditations that are relaxing, but require some focus and work
  • There are others that really emphasize relaxation, regeneration and minimum effort/energy expenditure and creating energy for recovery

So, when you are about to engage in an activity, or a meditation, it’s good to be clear about which mode you are going to be in, and what the objective is, are you trying to achieve something but expend energy, or trying to restore energy, or something that is a bit of both?

To conclude, here are three sample meditation techniques. The first is a net neutral one, the second energy expending, the third restorative. If you were feeling you had energy on any given day, you could do mainly one and two. But if you were feeling really exhausted at the end of a hard day, you could do mainly or exclusively the last (links to further details of each technique are included).

  • Free form breathing
  • Visualizing yourself as an adventurer in life
  • Relaxing into safety & brain relaxation

Free form breathing means to just allow your body to breathe as it wants to breathe in order to release stress and move towards balance. All you need to do is allow your body to do what it needs to do, and keep your mental attention on the breathing as the body goes through its process.
Visualize yourself as an adventurer in life, meaning confident in the face of your challenges, feeling enthusiastic, energetic, strong, courageous. Visualize yourself for a few minutes like this, viewing from the first person (in your body as the adventurer) and third person (as an observer). Build the feelings and visuals clearly and specifically! This should feel good, but it takes some effort
Relaxing into safety and brain relaxation. For the final section, recognize that you are safe in the moment (no immanent threats to your wellbeing), and relax your physical brain. Imagine it goes into sleep mode, like a computer – Still switched on but functions minimized! Try and make yourself as relaxed as possible, almost asleep but still a degree of awareness. Less effort more ease and regeneration…

So, there you go, that’s an example of the three types of meditation that you can try.
One final point here is that you can also do one meditation in three different ways. For example, you can do the free form breathing in a way that is really emphasizing focus and clarity, or you can do it in a more relaxed way, not worrying so much about effort, just emphasizing release and flowing into restfulness.

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Ongoing – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practiceOverview: Life is an adventure in the experience of being conscious. To meditate and to be a meditator is to engage in this experience full-bloodedly, with the intention to get the very most out of the opportunity that we have been given, both in terms of enjoyment, and in terms of our potential to achieve worthwhile goals that are congruent with our inner values. This is a dynamic meditation course that covers…read full details

 



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Saturday September 24th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat

Saturday September 10th, 9.30-12noon – Full Moon Zen deep-dive mini-retreat


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Energy Meditation Inner vision Life-fullness Meditation techniques Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Meditation & inner healing

“Sometimes simply to sit with the intention to look within and heal can be a powerful practice in itself. The journey to wholeness begins with mindful orientation around this”

 

Dear Integral Meditators,

To be a meditator can be considered in a number of different ways, in my second article on the subject below we look at a meditator as someone committed to self-healing on a deeper level.

If you enjoy the article, the subject is covered in my latest class series, An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice that starts on 16/17th August, and can be participated in live, online or using the recordings.

In the spirit of  healing,

Toby


Meditation & inner healing (What is a meditator? Article 2)

In my previous article I outlined two definitions of what it means to be a meditator:

  1. To be an Adventurer in consciousness
  2. A practitioner of the primary life-skills of awareness & attention

In this article I’m going to outline a another; a meditator as someone deeply committed to self-healing. I’ll outline a bit of what I mean by this, and then I’ll suggest come ways to start practicing.

Definition 3: Someone committed to self-healing – A meditator is someone who is committed to looking inward in order to see, take care of and heal the parts of themselves that are injured, wounded or broken and returning them to health. I’m talking primarily about the psychological parts of self here rather than physical self, although meditation can and does have a substantial effect on physical healing.
I’m suggest three practices for self-healing below. The practices can be done as sitting exercises, or taken as principles to be mindfully integrated into your overall approach to your life.

Practices for self-healing

1. Letting old wounds heal – If you keep picking at a scab on your knee, it will keep re-opening the wound, and prevent it from healing. It can be a great approach to inner healing just to acknowledge a particular wound (Eg: A bad relationship from the past that scarred us emotionally), and then leave it alone, let time pass and gently heal the damage that has been done, a little bit like vegetation and grass reclaims land that has been dug up or overused. ‘I choose to relax and let old wounds heal naturally, and in their own time’.

2. Revisiting difficult emotions therapeutically – This second practice involves deliberately invoking the memories and experiences of wounds and burdens, specifically in order to acknowledge, accept and then release them. Unlike the previous method here we are engaging the wound in order to use the knowing and experiencing of the wound as a healing agent. A key to understanding this technique is to know that awareness heals. By mindfully revisiting past blocks and breakages, we can begin a process of tangible movement towards wholeness.

3. Expanding beyond and transcending your wounds – In this section I’m just going to place a Jung quote that explains the principle very well. Essentially to expand and grow broader is, in many ways to heal:
The greatest and most important problems of life are all in a certain sense insoluble…They can never be solved, but only outgrown. This outgrowing as I formerly called it, on further experience was seen to consist in a new level of consciousness. Some higher or wider interest arose in the person’s horizon, and through this widening of view, the insoluble problem lost its urgency. It was not solved logically on its own terms, but faded out when confronted with a new and stronger life-tendency.”

A final comment here, sometimes simply to sit with the intention to look within and heal can be a powerful practice in itself. The journey to wholeness begins with mindful orientation around this intention.

In case you missed my previous article: Adventuring with attention (What is a Meditator?)

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practiceOverview: Life is an adventure in the experience of being conscious. To meditate and to be a meditator is to engage in this experience full-bloodedly, with the intention to get the very most out of the opportunity that we have been given, both in terms of enjoyment, and in terms of our potential to achieve worthwhile goals that are congruent with our inner values. This is a dynamic meditation course that covers…read full details


Saturday August 13th, 9.30-12noon – Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Session overview: These 2.5hour Zen ‘mini-retreats’ are a chance to go into much deeper meditation states than you would be able to in your own personal daily practice, or even if you came to a one-hour class. Using sitting meditation methods in combination with breathing techniques and gentle stretching/mobility exercises Toby will guide you into deep meditative flow states that create the experience of a calm, unified, harmonized, resilient body, mind & heart…read full details

 



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Saturday August 13th, 9.30-12noon – Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Saturday August 27th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Confidence

Adventuring with attention (What is a Meditator?)

 

“Life is an adventure in the experience of being conscious. To meditate and to be a meditator is to engage in this experience full-bloodedly, with the intention to get the very most out of the opportunity”

Dear Integral Meditators,

To be a meditator can be considered in a number of different ways, in the article below I outline two ways of thinking about being a meditator that I hope you will find enlightening!

If you enjoy the article, then do consider joining in my latest class series, An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice that starts on 16/17th August, and can be participated in live, online or using the recordings.

In the spirit of adventuring,

Toby


Adventuring with attention (What is a Meditator?)

What is a meditator? Why do you meditate? Here are two definitions of what a meditator is or can be, and some simple practices relating to them.

Definition 1: An adventurer in consciousness – Life is an adventure in the experience of being conscious. To meditate and to be a meditator is to engage in this experience full-bloodedly, with the intention to get the very most out of the opportunity that we have been given, both in terms of enjoyment, and in terms of our potential to achieve worthwhile goals that are congruent with our inner and outer values.

Definition 2: A practitioner of the primary life-skills of awareness & attention – A meditator is someone dedicated to the practice of conscious, intentional awareness & attention. If you want to get good at anything in your life, the art of being aware and paying attention is a foundational pre-skill that you need. Said another way, if you know how to be aware and pay attention well, you can learn almost anything. Learning a sport, taking care of your health, being a competent professional, looking after relationships all require good quality attention and awareness. Meditation and mindfulness are the art of paying attention and being aware. If you get good at these, your chances of being successful in your chosen endeavours in life increase substantially.

Practices based upon these definitions:

Position 1 – Adventuring with confidence: To be an adventurer in life and in your consciousness is to be fundamentally confident. Adventurers don’t shy away from life; they open themselves to it and to the possibilities that it offers. Experiment with simply sitting in a posture that describes confidence, and that helps you to feel confident. Some features might include:

  • A tall crown, an open chest, shoulders relaxed off the neck
  • Relaxed hands, arms and hands
  • A relaxed face and warm facial expression

Sit with confidence and just hold the experience of it in your body mind. Let it become a part of your fundamental way of engaging life in the moment.
The quote by Dion fortune is quite a good contemplation for this position “Life may be difficult, but it is not bewildering. Meanwhile we have to endure.”* A meditator sits, stands and holds her/himself with confidence that endures in the face of life’s ups and downs.

Position 2 – Heightening awareness & attention: As an illustration for this practice, consider this Anthony De Mello short story entitled ‘Spirituality’:
‘Even though it was the Master’s Day of Silence a traveller begged for a word of
wisdom that would guide him through life’s journey.
The Master nodded affably, took a sheet of paper and wrote a single word on it:
“Awareness.
The visitor was perplexed. “That’s too brief. Would you please expand on it a bit?”
The Master took the paper back and wrote: “Awareness, awareness, awareness.”
“But what do these words mean?” said the stranger helplessly.
The Master reached out for the paper and wrote: “Awareness, awareness, awareness
means AWARENESS.”’

Try simply being 10-15% more aware, either as you sit, or as you go for a walk. You can actually be practising this in any activity you like, but it is good to set some time aside just to sit and be aware as a meditative exercise. Simply notice what is around you, what is going on within you. For the duration of the practice, try to stay merely with awareness and attention, nothing more, nothing less. The proposition would be that, if you start to notice what IS in any given moment, your chances of making effective choices around the situation are increased the more you are paying attention!

I hope you enjoyed these two definitions and their attending practices; this is the first of two (or maybe three) articles covering this subject of what is a meditator, see you next week for the second!

*The Magical Battle of Britain page 8

In case you missed my previous article: Dealing mindfully with worry and anxiety at work – Five positions

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practiceOverview: Life is an adventure in the experience of being conscious. To meditate and to be a meditator is to engage in this experience full-bloodedly, with the intention to get the very most out of the opportunity that we have been given, both in terms of enjoyment, and in terms of our potential to achieve worthwhile goals that are congruent with our inner values. This is a dynamic meditation course that covers…read full details


Saturday August 13th, 9.30-12noon – Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Session overview: These 2.5hour Zen ‘mini-retreats’ are a chance to go into much deeper meditation states than you would be able to in your own personal daily practice, or even if you came to a one-hour class. Using sitting meditation methods in combination with breathing techniques and gentle stretching/mobility exercises Toby will guide you into deep meditative flow states that create the experience of a calm, unified, harmonized, resilient body, mind & heart…read full details

 



Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Saturday August 13th, 9.30-12noon – Zen deep-dive mini-retreat

Starts Tues 16th /Weds 17th August – An Adventure in Consciousness – The What, Why & How of integral & engaged meditation practice

Saturday August 27th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Dealing mindfully with worry and anxiety at work – Five positions

 

“I trust and have confidence in my capability and ability to solve the problems that come up today”

 

Dear Integral Meditators,

Its good to be specific about developing your applied mindfulness skills, this weeks article focuses on how to use mindfulness to deal with worry and anxiety at work. I hope you enjoy it!

This weeks Tuesday & Wednesday class is on ‘vigilance and presence’, it’s the last one in July, we shall be re-starting third week in August.

In the spirit of thriving,

Toby

 


Dealing mindfully with worry and anxiety at work – Five positions

If you think about your worries and anxieties, the domains of work and family/relationships will definitely be present, and often dominate. This article aims to give some mindful pointers for dealing with worries around work. The principles apply to worry and anxiety in general, but its good to be specific in our understanding of these methods, and really get to know how to apply them to our professional life (if you’re a student, then your student life). Each one of them is a domain in itself, but the idea here is we are putting these positions together into a combination where the sum is greater than the individual parts. Practiced in sequence it is designed to give you deep confidence in dealing with habitual worry at work.

Position 1– Understanding what worry is: If we define worry and anxiety here as “Thinking about your problems without confidence or trust in yourself” this means that underlying the symptom of worrying about work, there is often an implicit lack of fundamental trust in yourself and your capability to solve problems that come up. “I trust and have confidence in my capability and ability to solve the problems that come up today” is a great starting mantra for worrying less.

Position 2 – Sitting, standing and walking with confidence: How you hold your body sends messages to your brain about your situation and world. Don’t let your shoulders slope and your chest cave in. Hold your body as if you were confident, and you will find your mindset changes for the better around your work worries.

Position 3 – Support your worried self: Direct warmth, understanding and support to the part of you that worries and is anxious, and in particular the part of you that get worries about issues relating to work. Don’t let this part of you feel alone, rejected or abandoned.

Position 4 – Be specific: Bringing to mind particular situations at work that you find worrying and would like to experience differently. Think and plan about what can be done on a practical level. Identify things that you can do today to move forward positively. If there is nothing that can be done today, then accept that, and identify when you are next going to be pro-active. Until then be conscious around accepting and keeping relaxed around waiting. Letting go of what cannot be done for now

Position 5 – Create context: Balancing your problem shooting with appreciation for what’s good at work and excitement about the present and future possibilities for you there. Don’t let worry dominate your perception and experience of work, there is plenty going on there that is not that!

I hope you have enjoyed reading about these four positions. If you can now keep them in mind and focus on applying them in your daily life, then you will start to notice your worry and anxiety going down, and your self confidence and trust going up around your challenges at work.

Related articleHow to Mindfully Develop Your Self-Confidence

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Ongoing– The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for irreverent clarity & authentic vigilanceIn a sentence: Learn the art of ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom through integrative meditation
Overview: The Wisdom of Awakening series is an ongoing series that looks at different ways to ‘wake up’ and live your life fully and playfully through meditation. The premise of the sessions is that inner wholeness and wisdom are not something that are far away, rather they are something that we can awaken to ‘instantly’ through certain types of mindful attention…. Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby
 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday /Wednesday 14/15th June – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for irreverent clarity & authentic vigilance

Saturday August 27th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Concentration Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Uncategorized

The way to silence

The way to silence ….is to meditate. And what is the way to meditate? To be silent!”

Dear Integral Meditators,

Silence is a skill that you could build basic competence at if you devoted 5mins a day for the next month to it. Are you up for the challenge? Read the article below to get started!

In the spirit of silence,

Toby

 

 


The way to silence

….is to meditate. And what is the way to meditate? To be silent!
This is a fun little paradox, and it is worth exploring a little more.

Silence is at a premium
These days our heads are very full of noise, and there is the incessant information coming at us from our environment, the internet and our phones. Because of this, and also because of our identification and addiction to thoughts and information, many people find it impossible to silence their mind to the extent that they don’t even want to try as the results are so discouraging. Because of this accessing silence well is a premium skill that has particular value for us.

How to meditate
To meditate in the simplest terms is to be present to your immediate experience, and be aware of that experience. This means to gather your attention away from ideas and concepts of past and future, and let your attention rest in the present. Then what you need to do is avoid falling asleep, or dozing off! So, meditation is the space between thinking/concepts and sleep/inertia; holding that space, and being alert and aware in that space. If you start practicing this you will discover that this space is also a silent one, or that there is silence present in that space.

Brain relaxation
It’s helpful for thought reduction to relax your brain. Our brain is our organ of thought, so if you relax, the number of thoughts that you have is correspondingly reduced. If you focus attention on your physical brain, breathe in be aware of any tension in it, breathe out release that tension, after a short while you will notice the difference.

Regenerative silence
So, if you sit in meditation like this, you’ll start to notice little patches of silence. Maybe they are only a few seconds long before you get distracted, but as long as you keep practicing, the patches of silence will grow. You will also notice that you don’t ‘create’ silence, its already there underneath the noise. When you relax and become present, the silence reveals itself right there, without you ‘doing’ anything. Whenever you enter into silence (or even just a little bit more silent than before), you will notice that it is relaxing, regenerative and helps you find a sense of basic sanity.

Creative silence
Silence is a space of no-thing, the point is there is nothing there. Moving deeper into silence, we discover that it also creates spaces that help us to imagine our life and our way of going and being in a new way. It is generative, from silence and being, our process of becoming starts to evolve.

Singular silence
Silence also creates singularity, focus. All our energy gathers into the silence, we become integrated, powerful. The side effect of this during the day is that it becomes easier to focus on tasks, there is less inner interference and we become more effective in life.

Silence amidst the noise
After a while you will notice that the silence is always there. You can ‘hear’ it even when your surrounded by noise and are thinking actively. It becomes something that you can dip into at will, which is a pleasure that also gives rise to confidence and, (in my experience) a sense of humour and playfulness.
I’ll leave you with a short story from Anthony De Mello’s ‘One minute wisdom’, Enjoy the silence!

‘RELIGION’
The Governor on his travels stepped in to pay homage to the Master.
“Affairs of State leave me no time for lengthy dissertations,” he said. “Could you put
the essence of religion into a paragraph or two for a busy man like me?”
“I shall put it into a single word for the benefit of Your Highness.”
“Incredible! What is that unusual word?”
“Silence.”
“And what is the way to Silence?”
“Meditation.”
“And what, may I ask, is meditation?”
“Silence.”

Related articleMeditating on the sound of silence

© Toby Ouvry 2022, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Ongoing– The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for irreverent clarity & authentic vigilanceIn a sentence: Learn the art of ‘instant awakening’ and playful wisdom through integrative meditation
Overview: The Wisdom of Awakening series is an ongoing series that looks at different ways to ‘wake up’ and live your life fully and playfully through meditation. The premise of the sessions is that inner wholeness and wisdom are not something that are far away, rather they are something that we can awaken to ‘instantly’ through certain types of mindful attention…. Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby
 

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday /Wednesday 14/15th June – The Wisdom of Awakening series: Meditations for irreverent clarity & authentic vigilance

Saturday August 27th, 9.30-11.30am – Monthly Qi Gong & Taoist Breathwork Clinic & Mini-retreat


 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology