Category: Integral Awareness

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Awareness and insight Energy Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Self-Leadership

Meditating with your parental self

“If we are already, or have aspirations to be an outer parent, needless to say the better our relationship to inner parenting we have, the more equipped we are to be a competent outer parent”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article focuses on how to start working with the psychological sub-personality known as the ‘inner parent’. Its something that we focus on quite extensively in my Mindful Self Knowledge coaching program.

In the spirit of inner parenting,

Toby

Meditating with your parental self

Who is your parental self?
The mature adult or parental-self (for this article let’s consider them the same, although they can be distinguished) is that part of your psyche that embodies the mature ego. It is able to bear responsibilities in life, knows how to plan for the future, and to nurture and protect the lower levels of self (child and youth), ideally with a balance of firmness and love

Why is it important to get to know this part of yourself?
From the above definition we can see that our parental self is vital for living a fulfilling, healthy life. We need it to navigate problems, set goals (and stick to them), interact with others successfully, and look after other aspects of our inner psyche, principally our inner child.
If we are already or have aspirations to be an outer parent, needless to say the better our relationship to inner parenting we have, the more equipped we are to be a competent outer parent!

Two aspects or dimensions of our parental self
Like our outer parents, our inner parent has two dimensions, or aspects; the mother and father. Here is a bit more detail on them (Definitions taken from Nathaniel Branden, the Six Pillars of Self Esteem, page 265ff):
The mother-self is the component of the psyche containing an internalization of the personality, perspective, and values of an individual’s mother (or older female “mother figures” who had an influence and impact during childhood. We are dealing with the individual and historical, not the generic or universal “Mother”. (This is very different from Transactional Analysis’s generic “parent ego-state. Mother and Father are both parents, but they are very different and should not be treated as a psychological unit; they often send very different messages and have very different attitudes and values.)
The father-self is the component of the psyche containing an internalization of the personality, perspective, and values of an individual’s father (or older male “father figures” who had an influence and impact during childhood.)
Our parental selves are a psychic reality, that we are interacting with all the time, it’s just a matter of whether we are doing it consciously or unconsciously. The exercises below offer a few pointers for getting started.

Free association on your parental selves.
Bring to mind the words ‘my mother self’ or ‘my father self’ (choose one or other at a time initially). Holding it within your awareness allow your mind to start to free –associate feelings, images, memories, thoughts, desires and actions/activities with your mother or father-self. At this stage the main thing is to focus on being curious as to what sort of memories, feelings and so on arise when you contemplate the idea of your mother or father self. Whether these feelings and memories are pleasant or unpleasant is secondary, the main thing is simply to see what comes up without editing any of the content.
After a while ask yourself the question “What does my mother or father-self look like?” Allow your mind to build an image of your mother and father-self; s/he may simply be an image of yourself as a mature adult of a certain age, but equally s/he may be different from your literal, historical mature adult-self in some way; for example, s/he may resemble one of your parents or other adult role models that you have had.

Asking opinions and perspectives
Once you have a visual on both your inner parents, you can start getting to know them; their opinions, perspectives and how they function. You can start to discern which parts of them are working well and are healthy, and which parts are dysfunctional and in need of healing. Together with them you can create an inner parental self that is consistent, can be relied upon and is both firm and loving to your child self.

Related article: Meditating with your inner child

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Saturday 19th June, 9.30-11.30am – Deep dive breathing meditation masterclass

This masterclass teaches six complementary breathing techniques that will help you:

  • Connect to your body’s natural intelligence and capacity to move towards balance and harmony
  • Release stress and tension on progressively deeper levels
  • Combine relaxation with sustainably higher energy levels
  • Make your life and activities into a ‘flow’ state
  • Develop systematically deeper states of physical, psychological and spiritual concentration
  • Reduce over active thinking and cultivate stillness
  • Cultivate breathing patterns that are conducive to physical health and well-being

Read full details…

Tues 22nd & Weds 23rd June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation
The Summer Solstice (Called by the Celts ‘Alban Hefin’, or ‘the Light of Summer’) is the high point of summer in the northern hemisphere, the point of the Suns maximum power in the year, & the longest day. It is a good time to attune the life-force in the earth & creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with our own inner power, solar confidence & expressive self.

At the summer solstice, we can think about the autumn & winter periods that lie ahead of us, what our goals & expectations are, & sow the seeds on an inner level of the things that we wish to manifest over the next few months.
Full details…


Saturday 26th June, 2-5.30pm – Wabi-Sabi mindfulness – The art of creative leadership and self-leadership workshop

In a sentence: Learn how to work creatively with uncertainty, imperfection and life’s inherent messiness to realize your leadership and self-leadership potential.  Manage stress and anxiety better using mindfulness in combination with the practical philosophy of Wabi-Sabi.
Principle aspects of Wabi-Sabi include:

  • An appreciation of the beauty of the impermanent, the imperfect and incomplete
  • A recognition of the value of humility
  • A willingness to engage with the unconventional

Read full details…

Weekend of 9,10,11th July – The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors & Therapists – Creating sustainable high performance and & wellness

10% early bird offer: Up until the 22nd June SGD$765 (Course price $850)

Overview: This is a weekend, three-session dynamic mindfulness program designed for:

  • Those looking for an engaged, practical mindfulness course designed to build resilience, effectiveness and wellness in the face of work and life challenges
  • Trainers, coaches and therapists looking to integrate mindfulness into their own professional practice with clients
  • People who have been through basic conventional mindfulness training programs and are looking for the next level of practice and performance

The essential content of the course is ten separate but interlinked mindfulness meditation practices…
Read full details

The new Mindful Self Knowledge coaching program

This is eight-month coaching program with Toby is designed to facilitate your own personal mindful self-discovery process. It focuses on:

  • Awareness of how your past experience has influenced who and how you are today
  • Confidence in approaching your present experience with playful fullness and enthusiasm
  • Giving you the inner tools to face your choices and your future in an empowered, dynamic, and authentic manner

Read full details

Watch Toby’s video on the Program:

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Ongoing Tues/Wednesday – Meditations for physical, emotional & environmental health & regeneration – A 7-week course

Saturday 19th June, 9.30-11.30am – Deep dive breathing meditation masterclass

Tues 22nd & Weds 23rd June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Saturday 26th June, 2-5.30pm – Wabi-Sabi mindfulness – The art of creative leadership and self-leadership workshop

Weekend of 9,10,11th July – The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors & Therapists – Creating sustainable high performance and & wellness

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Awareness and insight Energy Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Motivation and scope Presence and being present Using the Energy of Negative Emotions

Transforming worry to wise concern

“Cultivate feelings of confidence and self-trust around your problems, and think about them from this position, rather than intimidation and rumination”

Dear Integral Meditators,

What would it take to transform your worrying to wise concern? This weeks article explores a few practical pointers!

Full details of all sessions in June are below, as well as the next The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors & Therapists in July, which is on special early bird offer until 7th June!.

In the spirit of wise concern,

Toby

Transforming worry to wise concern

What would it take to transform your worrying to wise concern? Here are a few thoughts and mindful pointers

Worry – thinking about your problems without confidence
When we feel intimidated and oppressed by our problems and concerns we tend to fall into the anxious, repetitive patterns of thinking, feeling and acting that we know as worrying. It’s not particularly pleasant, and often it doesn’t help us a huge amount. Sometimes we worry because we lack confidence in ourself, but also the more we worry, often the less confident we feel about ourselves. It can be a vicious circle.

Faith in yourself, faith in life’s process
So a part of transforming your worry into wise concern is to develop confidence, faith and trust in your ability to meet your problems well, and that a solution is very possible. This is partly an attitude that you can practice that then in turn becomes a habit. We can approach this from a mental/psychological perspective, and a somatic one:

Mental/Psychological: Rumination as opposed to directed, creative thinking
When we are worried, not confident and feeling intimidated by our problems, often we ruminate. To ruminate means to think in a low quality, repetitive way about what we are going through. It leaches our energy and often takes us no closer to a solution. Wise concern seeks to think creatively and intelligently about the presenting issue, and knows when to stop thinking for now and accept that nothing more can be done for the time being.

Somatic: Your stomach; seat of power or seat of worry?
In Taoist philosophy and meditation the seat of our worrying in the body is the stomach. Our solar plexus chakra, which is in very close proximity to our stomach is our centre of power and confidence. So it can be quite interesting to explore this area of our torso, which is right in its central zone, in order to process our feelings of worry in the body, and also to see if we can mindfully impose a feeling of strength and calm in this central space.

Wise concern  – Dwelling upon your problems without feeling intimidated by them
In conclusion:

  • Notice and extend care and concern to the parts of us that worry and are worried
  • Cultivate feelings of confidence and self-trust around your problems, and think about them from this position, rather than intimidation and rumination
  • Think deliberately with wise concern about your challenges, rather than ruminating
  • Explore and cultivate a feeling of comfort, confidence and power in the stomach and solar plexus zones of the body, and notice how this changes the way in which you process your challenges and problems!

Related article: Plan more, worry less!

Article & content © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

 

Saturday 19th June, 9.30-11.30am – Deep dive breathing meditation masterclass

This masterclass teaches six complementary breathing techniques that will help you:

  • Connect to your body’s natural intelligence and capacity to move towards balance and harmony
  • Release stress and tension on progressively deeper levels
  • Combine relaxation with sustainably higher energy levels
  • Make your life and activities into a ‘flow’ state
  • Develop systematically deeper states of physical, psychological and spiritual concentration
  • Reduce over active thinking and cultivate stillness
  • Cultivate breathing patterns that are conducive to physical health and well-being

Read full details…

Tues 22nd & Weds 23rd June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation
The Summer Solstice (Called by the Celts ‘Alban Hefin’, or ‘the Light of Summer’) is the high point of summer in the northern hemisphere, the point of the Suns maximum power in the year, & the longest day. It is a good time to attune the life-force in the earth & creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with our own inner power, solar confidence & expressive self.

At the summer solstice, we can think about the autumn & winter periods that lie ahead of us, what our goals & expectations are, & sow the seeds on an inner level of the things that we wish to manifest over the next few months.
Full details…


Saturday 26th June, 2-5.30pm – Wabi-Sabi mindfulness – The art of creative leadership and self-leadership workshop

In a sentence: Learn how to work creatively with uncertainty, imperfection and life’s inherent messiness to realize your leadership and self-leadership potential.  Manage stress and anxiety better using mindfulness in combination with the practical philosophy of Wabi-Sabi.
Principle aspects of Wabi-Sabi include:

  • An appreciation of the beauty of the impermanent, the imperfect and incomplete
  • A recognition of the value of humility
  • A willingness to engage with the unconventional

Read full details…

Weekend of 9,10,11th July – The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors & Therapists – Creating sustainable high performance and & wellness

Early bird offer: Up until the 7th June SGD$680 (Course price $850)

Overview: This is a weekend, three-session dynamic mindfulness program designed for:

  • Those looking for an engaged, practical mindfulness course designed to build resilience, effectiveness and wellness in the face of work and life challenges
  • Trainers, coaches and therapists looking to integrate mindfulness into their own professional practice with clients
  • People who have been through basic conventional mindfulness training programs and are looking for the next level of practice and performance

The essential content of the course is ten separate but interlinked mindfulness meditation practices…

Read full details

 

 

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Ongoing Tues/Wednesday – Meditations for physical, emotional & environmental health & regeneration – A 7-week course

Saturday 19th June, 9.30-11.30am – Deep dive breathing meditation masterclass

Tues 22nd & Weds 23rd June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Saturday 26th June, 2-5.30pm – Wabi-Sabi mindfulness – The art of creative leadership and self-leadership workshop

Weekend of 9,10,11th July – The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors & Therapists – Creating sustainable high performance and & wellness

 

Categories
Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present Stress Transformation

Taking the weight off your chest (Transforming sadness)

“Running from difficult emotions is a way of coping with them, turning and facing them is a way of learning to thrive off them”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks Tuesday & Wednesday evening classes will be on transforming sadness and connecting to courage, which is the subject of the article below.

The article also touches on some of the principles of Taoist qi gong meditation, which I’ll be exploring on some depth on the 15th of May in my Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Finally, if your interested in meditation and sound technology, my favorite brain entrainment meditation track of all time is Digital Acupuncture is on 20% special offer for the next couple of days. Check it out if your interested, you can read a bit more about the principles on me ‘meditation technology page‘.

In the spirit of the courage to transforming sadness,Toby

 

Taking the weight off your chest (Transforming sadness)

Effecting transformation
In order to transform our difficult emotions, we need to be able to turn and face them. Our instinctive response to them is often the opposite; to run and hide from them, repress the, deny them or avoid them. Running and hiding from emotions we can’t face is a coping mechanism, turning and facing them is a way of learning to thrive off them. In this article I’m going to talk about this in terms of sadness and grief as an example.

The physical location of sadness and grief
We often talk about sadness as ‘heaviness of heart’, and it’s certainly true we feel often feel it as a heaviness in the chest. In the Taoist tradition the emotions of sadness and grief are said to sit in the lungs, which is also true from all of our experience in the sense that, when we feel sad, we ‘sigh’, which is a particular way of breathing that holds the sadness. The chest area in general then holds a lot of our sadness physically.

Acknowledging and feeling the weight
In order to start working with your own sadness, just bring to mind the words ‘my sadness’ and or ‘my grief’. Just let yourself free associate around these words. Allow your mind to bring up memories and subjects of sadness for you, and notice your bodily response to the sadness. In particular focus on the weight of the feeling in your lungs and chest area. As you breathe in allow yourself to feel the sadness, as you breathe out relax into the sensation of it, gently allowing it to be there.

Releasing the sadness
As you breathe in extend care and understanding to your lungs, and to the sadness there. As you breathe out smile to the sadness, inviting it to gradually brighten and be released (you can combine this section with the inner smile meditation in my previous article). Without being in a hurry, allow the energy of the emotions embedded in your lungs and chest area to start to change and transform.

Opening to joy and courage
Once you have effected a sense of release in your lungs and chest, you can begin to invite the positive emotions associated with these areas; joy and courage, to fill up the space. The energy that was previously locked in the patterns of sadness and grief can be re-calibrated into these positive emotions and qualities. Smile, relax and feel joy and courage filling your lungs as you inhale. Feel your whole chest area becoming strong and resilient, both physically and emotionally healthy.

So, there is the basic pattern. Of course, I’m describing a process that will take more than just one session to effect deep change. You also need courage to persist and consistently turn and face the layers of sadness that come up when you start to release years’ worth of it! With skillful and wise consistency, you can deeply change the energetic dynamic of your chest and lung area, and the inner emotional landscape that goes with it.

Related article/recording: Smiling to the inner organs meditation 

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

20% Special offer Until May 12th – DIGITAL ACUPUNCTURE
Qi-Encoded Nature Sounds for Healing, Renewal, and Releasing Stress

Digital Acupuncture (formerly called Audio Acupuncture), a part of iAwake’s Energy Alchemy Series, contains soundtracks embedded with a unique energetic signature of the human acupuncture meridian map which optimizes the healthy flow of qi through all the acupuncture meridians.
See full details

Saturday 15th May – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing Masterclass & Mini-retreatQi-gong is the science of working with the body’s energy field. Literally translated into English it means ‘energy work’, or ‘energy skill’.  In this workshop Toby will be teaching the art of moving subtle energy and life force into and around our body using a series of simple and easy to apply techniques that will enable you to:

  • Re-establish your body’s natural bio-rhythms
  • Strengthen your immune system
  • Balance the energy in your body and mind, leading to inner peace and wellbeing

Read full details here

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Ongoing Tues/Wednesday – Meditations for physical, emotional & environmental health & regeneration – A 7-week course

Saturday 15th May – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Tuesday 25th & Weds 26th May – Wesak Full Moon Meditation

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mindful dreaming Presence and being present

Meditating with your child-self

“Our inner child is important because it connects us to our creativity, our emotional health and spontaneity, our playfulness and vitality. Do you remember how much energy you had as a child!”

Dear Integral Meditators,

If you enjoy this weeks article and are a parent, then do check out my  Mindful Parenting – Practical Techniques for Bringing Awareness, Appreciation and Enjoyment to the Experience of Parenting coming up on Saturday 8th May.
An entirely new series of meditation sessions next week, Tues/Wednesday 4th/5th May –Meditations for physical, emotional & environmental health & regeneration – A 7-week course
Details of all that’s on in May below the article!

In the spirit of our playful child,

Toby

 

Meditating on your child-self

The child self is one of a number of inner aspects of ourself that, if we meditate upon, we find ourselves connecting to in an experiential and enriching way. Other examples of this type of inner self, or sub-personality include the female self (if you are a male), the male self (if you are a woman), and the wise self, to name but a few.
Our inner child is important because in health it connects us to our creativity, our emotional health and spontaneity, our playfulness and vitality (remember how much energy you had as a child?!) Below I point out a few definitions and ways of beginning to relate to your inner child.

Definitions of your child self:
The child self is that part of us that is child-like in nature. You could say it has three aspects:

  • That part of us that is simply child like in nature; playful, naive, creative, innocent, gullible, needs looking after and so on
  • The historical child, that is the child within us whose character has been shaped and informed by our own literal historical upbringing; experience with parents, peers and other significant others, what happened to us in school, how we were treated and learned to gain approval and so on. The child within us now that is a product of our personal historical experience, and our response to that
  • The spiritual child within us – that part of us that is ever young, ever new, ever creative, ever both innocent and wise, whose light helps us begin again each time we burn out.

A psychological definition:
“The child-self is the component of the psyche containing the “personality” of the child one once was, with that child’s range of values, emotions, needs and responses; not a generic child or universal archetype, but a specific, historical child, unique to an individual’s history and development.” – Nathaniel Branden, definition taken from the Six Pillars of Self Esteem, page 265ff.
Notable Quote: “I have never worked with a depressed personality whose child self did not feel hated (not merely ignored or rejected) by an older part.” – Nat Branden

Meditation pointers for the child-self:

Free association: Bring to mind the words ‘my child-self’. Holding it within your awareness allow your mind to start to free –associate feelings, images, memories, thoughts and desires around your child-self. At this stage the main thing is to focus on being curious as to what sort of memories, feelings and so on arise when you contemplate the idea of your child self; whether these feelings and memories are pleasant or unpleasant is secondary, the main thing is simply to see what comes up without editing any of the content.
Connecting to your child-self: Imagine yourself in a place that you knew and loved as a child. As you sit or stand in that place, imagine your child self comes to meet you there. Spend time with your child, talking, connecting and building trust. Starting questions for the interaction might include:

  • What do you need from me to help feel happy and secure?
  • Is there anything that you want to say to me or offer me at this time?
  • What do you think about this (choose your domain) aspect of our life?
  • How can we find more time for play in our life together?

Like outer children, your inner child needs parenting with an appropriate about of firmness and love. By connecting to your inner-child you can also become a better parental self, both toward your inner-child, and toward outer children!

Related article: Your shadow child

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Starts Tues/Wednesday 4th/5th May – Meditations for physical, emotional & environmental health & regeneration – A 7-week courseOverview:  This is a meditation series designed to give you the practical skills to:

  1. Heal and regenerate the energy of your physical body and internal organs
  2. Revitalise and transform your emotional vitality
  3. Work with the landscape of  your local  environment to effect a healing of the land

Read full details…

Saturday 8th May, 2-5pm – Mindful Parenting – Practical Techniques for Bringing Awareness, Appreciation and Enjoyment to the Experience of ParentingIn a sentence: Learn how you can enjoy your experience of parenting more, manage emotions more effectively, and become a better parent by using mindful awareness

  • Are you a stressed out parent (or stressed about becoming one) and looking for ways to manage that stress more effectively?
  • Would you like to improve your capacity to parent in a way that creates an improved experience of the parent-child relationship both for you and your kids?
  • Would you like to be able to demonstrate calm and being present to your children in a way that will help them to become more calm and present themselves?

Read full details…

Saturday 15th May – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing Masterclass & Mini-retreatQi-gong is the science of working with the body’s energy field. Literally translated into English it means ‘energy work’, or ‘energy skill’.  In this workshop Toby will be teaching the art of moving subtle energy and life force into and around our body using a series of simple and easy to apply techniques that will enable you to:

  • Re-establish your body’s natural bio-rhythms
  • Strengthen your immune system
  • Balance the energy in your body and mind, leading to inner peace and wellbeing

Read full details here

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tues/Wednesday 4th/5th May – Meditations for physical, emotional & environmental health & regeneration – A 7-week course

Saturday 8th May, 2-5pm – Mindful Parenting – Practical Techniques for Bringing Awareness, Appreciation and Enjoyment to the Experience of Parenting

Saturday 15th May – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Tuesday 25th & Weds 26th May – Wesak Full Moon Meditation

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Awareness and insight Energy Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership

Resilience thru acceptance – matching your expectation with your reality

“The tension between our expectation and our reality, unless addressed continuously wears down our energy and resilience in a way that is absolutely avoidable”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks Tuesday and Wednesday classes will be meditations on resilience. In the article below I give some practical pointers for developing resilience by learning to match your expectations with your reality.

A reminder of this Saturday’s meditation mini-retreat; Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind  on Saturday. If you are really master your ability to still your mind, then this is the session to go for!

In the spirit of resilience,

Toby

 

Resilience thru acceptance – matching your expectation with your reality

If we take a working definition of resilience as the ability to bounce back quickly from setbacks and obstacles (or apparent setbacks and obstacles), then what are the most important things to be aware of to get good at it? In this article I’m going to be exploring the role of empowered acceptance in competent resilience.

The gap that wears you down continuously
The gap I am pointing to here is the gap between how you want things to be and how things are. This tension between expectation and reality, unless addressed continuously wears down our energy and resilience in a way that is avoidable.
Here are three simple examples of how we can close this gap using acceptance.

How the night will go
Over the last 10 months i have been living with interrupted sleep due to my baby daughter. If I have a few nights where she sleeps quite well, then I start to have the expectation that this coming night will go a certain way. Of course, my baby’s sleep pattern changes. If it changes for the worse, and I go into the night expecting an easy night, then when I have a more interrupted night I will naturally become irritated. This is because my expectation (“I should be getting this much sleep”) no longer matches the reality. Much of the friction and frustration I experience now comes from the ‘gap’ between my expectation and reality. So, the movement here is to recognize and accept that the pattern has changed, and that things wont be so easy for tonight. If I can do this, my expectation and reality now match, and I can simply focus on dealing with what IS!

How the business should be going
If I go on a good run in my coaching business, accumulating clients and gigs with little effort, then I can start to have the expectation that this will be how things are permanently. If for whatever reason this changes, then a gap can appear between my expectation and reality. “It should be easy to get clients and gigs, I shouldn’t be having to try so hard!” (Notice when the experience/reality gap appears, we start to use the words should and shouldn’t a lot!). If I can accept that the landscape has changed, and that I need to come up with new strategies, then the expectation vs reality gap disappears, and I can simply focus on what needs to be done.

Acceptance leads to harmony and energy saving
Form the above examples I hope you can start to see that mindful acceptance leads to a harmonization of ourself with our reality, where we are no longer wasting energy resisting what is.

Acceptance leads to empowered action
when we are no longer resisting what is, then our energy and intelligence is then free to spring into action to be constructive and pro-active about the presenting challenge. We can create and innovate in the face of impermanence and change, and enjoy the good feeling that comes from being more adaptable and effective.
From this I hope you can begin to see how acceptance leads to resilience and winning the long game. Then the question is, what are the domains in your life where there is a expectation/reality gap? If you can identify two or three of these, and start working with mindful acceptance in them, you can start to make a noticeable difference on your own resilience focusing in these domains.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Saturday 17th April, 2.15-5.15pm –Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind Mini-retreat
In a sentence: Develop the mindful skills that will enable your mental health and wellbeing to thrive, and how to still and focus our mind. Make your mind a source of quiet confidence & cease feeling overwhelmed by mental over-activity and busyness.

Overview: Would you like to:

  • Develop ways of working with your mind that will enable it and you to thrive?
  • Learn how you can connect to an inner stillness that is able to withstand the stresses and strains of your daily life, helping you stop feeling mentally & emotionally overwhelmed?
  • Feel as if you are in control of your mind, rather than it controlling you?

Read full write up…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 17th April, 2.15-5.15pm – Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind – Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Motivation and scope Presence and being present Uncategorized

Big-hearted, luminous kindness

 “Extending kindness to yourself has a healing effect on your body, heart and mind. Extending it to others creates positive connection on all sorts of levels. Going deeper into meditation with kindness enables us to contact a luminous dimension of our consciousness that is one half of the enlightened state.”

Dear Integral Mindfulness,

This weeks Tuesday and Wednesday classes will be meditations on kindness. In the article below I give some practical pointers to develop a robust kindness that can be relied upon to keep us energized and centred under stress….

If you missed it, then do check out last weeks article on the  Re-discovering joy in your thinking – Five aspects of mindful mental mastery.  If you enjoy it, I’ll be Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind – Masterclass & Mini-retreat on Saturday 17th April, and the Meditation for beginners workshop on the 10th April. Both cover practices related to mental mastery that you can start to use right away!

In the spirit of kindness,

Toby

 

Big-hearted, luminous kindness

Making kindness a basic state that you work with consciously everyday has many benefits. Extending it to yourself has a healing effect on your body, heart and mind. Extending it to others creates positive connection on all sorts of levels, and going deeper into meditation with kindness enables us to contact a luminous dimension of our consciousness that is one half of the enlightened state.

Big-hearted, luminous kindness
Kindness is really an extension of awareness. Whenever we pay attention to something or someone with caring awareness, we are practicing kindness. Kindness is a pleasant state in and of itself, but it also invokes a dynamism that encourages us to act and speak kindly. If you pay attention to yourself and others with kindness, you will quickly start to connect to the pleasure of it, and the healing qualities that it contains.

Big-hearted kindness means empowered kindness
When we practice kindness, ideally behind it should be the sense that our heart contains enough strength and power to be benevolent. We are being kind because we can, because we wish to, because we see the benefits, and because we wish to be a cause of the good in our life and in the life of others. When we meditate on kindness we are looking to find this type of kindness, that comes from a space of freedom, empowerment and choice. We should have a sense that it comes from a part of our creative nature, and a part of the art of the way we live. Sometimes this is not easy, so it is very much a discipline as well as an art!

Kindness to be liked and not dis-approved of
Sometimes we can find ourselves being ‘kind’ not because we feel benevolent or strong, but because we feel obliged, or we don’t want to be dis-approved of. If we notice this is the case, then we need to be a little bit careful. This is kindness essentially based around fear and a need for approval. Rather than being big-hearted, this type of kindness can be a type of weakness, and can lead to certain types of wishy-washy-ness and a weakening of our sense of inner strength and empowerment.

Reciprocal kindness
Of course when we are being kind to others, we find they return the favor. In this way we set up loops of kindness where everyone benefits and ‘wins’. Something to watch out for here is that, sometimes we can act kindly with an ulterior motive, which can become a kind of cynical or in-authentic kindness.

Luminous kindness
In meditation terms, the unitive or non-dual energy of spirit can be separated into two parts. These may be thought of of as bliss and emptiness or, conceived another way as a kind of primal luminosity flowing within the space of infinity. The psychological state of kindness corresponds in some essential ways to the luminosity, or bliss. So, if you first generate kindness on the level of human energy and emotion, and then stop thinking and relax into the inner spaciousness of your consciousness, you can start to get a feeling of this primal bliss or luminosity gently radiating out through the inner, infinite space of your consciousness.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed it, last weeks article: Re-discovering joy in your thinking – Five aspects of mindful mental mastery

Human beings are the mental Ferrari’s of the biological world. Our brains and minds are an incredibly powerful and creative instruments, which have enabled us to do incredible things. However, for many people this amazing capacity for thinking and conceptualizing is working against them. Most of us often feel:

  • That we cannot control the quantity or pace of our thoughts
  • That the content of our thoughts is often stressful or negative
  • We find ourself thinking about our problems in a way that makes them worse
  • Thinking feels exhaustive and addictive, we feel mentally overwhelmed and cognitively overloaded
  • The joy in our thinking is absent

Mental mastery, or mastery of the mind involves :

  • Exercising benevolent control over the quality and quantity of our thoughts
  • Turning useless, stressful ways of thinking into appropriately critical, useful ways of thinking
  • Avoiding cognitive overload and mental exhaustion
  • Learning to re-discover joy and enthusiasm in our thinking

Read full article…

 

Saturday 10th April, 3-4.30pm – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now (Live & Online) – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Once sentence summary: Learn the practical fundamentals of how to meditate and begin your own meditation practice in this short 90minute workshop
You may have heard how meditation can increase:

  • Your quality of life
  • Your sense of inner security and well-being
  • Your ability to love and be loved
  • Your concentration
  • Your ability to access inner peace

Read about the workshop

Saturday 17th April 11.30am-1.30pm & 2.15-5.15pm – Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind – Masterclass & Mini-retreat
In a sentence: Develop the mindful skills that will enable your mental health and wellbeing to thrive, and how to still and focus our mind. Make your mind a source of quiet confidence & cease feeling overwhelmed by mental over-activity and busyness.

Overview: Would you like to:

  • Develop ways of working with your mind that will enable it and you to thrive?
  • Learn how you can connect to an inner stillness that is able to withstand the stresses and strains of your daily life, helping you stop feeling mentally & emotionally overwhelmed?
  • Feel as if you are in control of your mind, rather than it controlling you?

Read full write up…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 10th April, 3-4.30pm – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now (Live & Online) – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Saturday 17th April 11.30am-1.30pm & 2.15-5.15pm – Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind – Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

Representing your values – Mindful self-trust 

“The more we are able to access the innate feeling of trusting ourself, the more relaxed and confident we will then tend to feel about our ability to represent our values consistently and capably; we feel we are in integrity with ourself.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at self-trust as a quality we can develop through mindfulness. If you enjoy it, we will be meditating on it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class this week.

Beneath the main article you can also find another one on overcoming passivity, in case you missed it!
In the spirit of self-trust,

Toby

 

 

Representing your values – Mindful self-trust

One fundamental way to build your own self-esteem and trust is to act with integrity, which is to say in accordance with your own values. If you are consistently speaking acting and being in a way that you are representing yourself appropriately, then you are going to feel secure within yourself, and that you are in the presence of someone trustworthy.
Here is a simple three stage cycle that you can use to build trust in yourself and your integrity.

Intention – “How can I act with integrity in this situation, what are my values here?” Firstly, in any given situation you need to turn up with the intention to represent your own values.
Consistency and reliability – “Am I consistently following through with my values?” Secondly, you need to be consistent about it. It’s not enough to begin with the intention, but then forget it half way and end up acting in a way that doesn’t represent our values at all.
Capability – “What are the skills I need to represent myself with integrity here?” Thirdly, you need to assess your capability to act in accordance with your values. Sometimes it is not that you don’t want to, or that you aren’t consistently trying, it is just that you lack the skill and capability to act in such a way. In this case you need to learn the appropriate skill to become capable.

Doing what you say you will do
So of course, there are a huge number of ways that these three stages can play out according to circumstance, but on a simple level it’s about doing what you say (to yourself) you will do, and demonstrating to yourself on a daily basis that you are trustworthy and can be relied upon.

  • If you say to yourself you are going to do some research into starting a new business tomorrow, then tomorrow do the research
  • If you say to yourself that you are going to talk to your partner about the difficult subject you have both been avoiding, then make sure you do so!
  • If you are being bullied at work and say your going to learn how to handle it better, then go and find someone who can teach you or coach you. If you don’t have the capability, then learn it

The state of self-trust
The state we are aiming for here is one that, when we are in our own company, we feel as if we are with someone whom we feel comfortable trusting

  • We trust the power of our conscious intention
  • We feel we can rely on ourself and our consistency
  • We may not have all the skills to deal with all scenarios, but we can trust ourselves to be pro-active, and acquire the skills we lack (when we do lack them) to become capable and effective

The feeling of trust invites integrity
The more we are able to access the innate feeling of trusting ourself, the more relaxed and confident we will then tend to feel about our ability to represent ourself and our values consistently and capably; we feel we are in integrity with ourself. It becomes a mutually enhancing circle of integrity and trust that we can use to feel energised and enthusiastic about our life, even and particularly when we are under pressure or navigating uncertainty.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed this article: Overcoming passivity (Centered, responsive, creative)

Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us. As a result, it is easier for us to turn toward our challenges, to face them directly, and respond consciously, creatively and dynamically to them. This in turn increases our sense of positive participation in and enjoyment of life. It becomes a playground for us to learn, develop and get stuck into, rather than a frightening, intimidating trap waiting to get us!
Read full article

Watch Toby’s 45 Second mindfulness video  – Overcoming passivity:

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

 

 

 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Energy Meditation Enlightened Flow Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation Recordings mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present Uncategorized

Overcoming passivity

 

“Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us.”

Dear Toby,
Mindfulness, well practiced should make us calmer, but not more passive. In the article below I explore a bit of the process whereby we can become more dynamically engaged in our life by being more mindful.
Quick practical note, the timings for the Psychic Self-Defence Masterclass and Mini-retreat have now been adjusted to be both on Saturday 27th March, from 10.30-12.30, and then 1.15-4.15.

In the spirit of pro-activity,

Toby

 

 

Overcoming passivity (Centered, responsive, creative)

Uncentered, anxious, passive
When we feel off balance mentally and emotionally, we naturally become more vulnerable to anxiety. When we are anxious, the tendency to avoid problems, challenges and stress instinctively causes us to avoid thinking about them, or to think fearfully. When we do this we become passive, non-creative and procrastinate. We then only act when we have to, as a reaction at the last minute, that we may not have thought through.

Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us. As a result, it is easier for us to turn toward our challenges, to face them directly, and respond consciously, creatively and dynamically to them. This in turn increases our sense of positive participation in and enjoyment of life. It becomes a playground for us to learn, develop and get stuck into, rather than a frightening, intimidating trap waiting to get us!

Centering yourself 
One simple way to mindfully center yourself is as follows:

  • Sitting of standing comfortably, locate the approximate center of your torso, somewhere between the heart and the solar plexus, mid-way between the front and back, left and right halves of the body. Don’t worry to much about exactness, just find the approximate literal physical center of your body.
  • As you breathe in, breathe your body energy into your center, feel your life-force and energy gathering there. As you breathe out, relax from this central point, feeling your life-force flowing from the centre of your body to the periphery.
  • Take a few breaths like this to physically, psychologically and energetically center. Relax into the solidity of this feeling

Turning and facing 
From this position of centre, being to mind a challenge that you are facing, one that might normally cause you to move into a state of avoidance, anxiety and passivity. Turn and face this issue, being mindful to stay centered, even as different emotions come up. Be curious, caring and courageous, what do you notice as you then amd face?

Responding pro-actively
Think to yourself ‘How can I engage in this challenge benevolently, creatively and pro-actively? What can I try? What can I offer?’
Your answers to these questions is your invitation to overcome your passivity, and get stuck in!

Watch Toby’s 45 Second mindfulness video  – Overcoming passivity:

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed this article: Mindful Optimism

Finding optimism 
What is the state of optimism like? Here are a few characteristics that occur to me:

  • Joyful-ness, enthusiasm
  • A sense of being supported by tangible and intangible forces in the world
  • The feeling of a bright and possibly exciting future ahead
  • The reasonable expectation good things are going to happen to you, both now and in the future
  • An expansive, bright and comfortable feeling in the body, as if you belong in the world, and you can operate there with ease
  • Read full article  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreatIn a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Mindful Optimism

“We don’t need to wait for optimism to come to us, we can cultivate it and learn to generate it deliberately in and out of meditation. By doing so it can become a state that is instinctive and intuitive for us, rather than happening only occasionally and circumstantially.”

 

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article is an exploration of the state of optimism. If you enjoy it, we will be meditating on it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class.

Quick practical note, the timings for the Psychic Self-Defence Masterclass and Mini-retreat have now been adjusted to be both on Saturday 27th March.

In the spirit of optimism,

Toby

 

Mindful Optimism

Finding optimism 
What is the state of optimism like? Here are a few characteristics that occur to me:

  • Joyful-ness, enthusiasm
  • A sense of being supported by tangible and intangible forces in the world
  • The feeling of a bright and possibly exciting future ahead
  • The reasonable expectation good things are going to happen to you, both now and in the future
  • An expansive, bright and comfortable feeling in the body, as if you belong in the world, and you can operate there with ease

If you think about times when you have felt optimistic in the past, you may start to notice that it is a bit like my description above. What other qualities characterize your own experience of optimism?
We don’t need to wait for optimism to come to us, we can cultivate it and learn to generate it deliberately in and out of meditation. By doing so it can become a state that is instinctive and intuitive for us, rather than happening only occasionally and circumstantially.

The Brightness of your life-force
To me optimism is very related to an overall sense of life-fullness. The experience is feeling full of life, with your life-force strongly present in the body, radiating out from your center into your energy field and into the world. Being optimistic makes you creative and solar, rather than passive and resigned.

Why optimism is difficult and pessimism is often easier
It can be easier to be pessimistic than optimistic. Reasons for this include:

  • Our natural psychological bias toward negative thinking and threat detection
  • Cognitive overload and emotional exhaustion
  • Anxiety
  • Previous traumas and negative experiences
  • A sense of being helpless in the face of the overwhelming problems of the world that are beyond our control

Each one of these factors is worth acknowledging within ourselves in order to release and let go of. The space and we create by doing this we can then begin to fill with conscious optimism.

Optimism, reason and reasoning
As well as the feeling of optimism, it’s well worth looking for verifiable facts in our life that make optimism reasonable and realistic. For example if I look at the state of my (own and my family’s) health, friendships and business right now there is a legitimate, factual basis for optimism. It’s important to have facts to back up our optimism, because pessimism, depression and anxiety often come as an overwhelming feeling. They ‘feel’ real, even if they have no basis.

Embodying and acting from optimism
We can back up the feeling of optimism by deliberately speaking optimistically and acting in a way that is consistent with optimism. For example, if I am talking to a friend about a problem that I am having, I usually make a point about why the challenge could be a good thing for me and all concerned. This way of speaking about it frames it in a way that makes it feel and seem like there is plenty of room for optimism, even if some aspects of what is happening are unpleasant or difficult.

Balancing optimism with critical thinking
Optimism makes it easier to face up to problems and challenges because we feel less intimidated by them. It is then easier to see drawbacks, problems, uncertainties in a critical and objective way, that doesn’t threaten our sense of optimism, and is indeed complementary to it.

PS: Life-fullness, which I mention in Paragraph 2 is also the style of coaching that I offer, the unique characteristics of which you can read about and watch here.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 1.15-4.15pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

 

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

 

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 1.15-4.15pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Opening to the abundance of possibility

“When we build a state of openness to possibility in meditation, we can make it part of our approach to daily life. Our world becomes a place of abundance and wealth. Our open-ness to possibility becomes a source of energy for us, feeding us as we move into the unknown.”

Dear Integral Meditators

Faced with the uncertainty of the future, how do you respond? The article below explores how you can go about energizing your relationship to the future by mindfully opening to possibilities!
Possibility is one of the meditation objects for a new course beginning on the 23/24th Feb Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course. It focuses on how you can use meditation to create increasing levels of energy in your life. Scroll down below for full details.

Wishing you all the very best for the upcoming lunar new year weekend, and the year of the Ox!

Toby

Opening to the abundance of possibility

The dance of possibility, anxiety and uncertainty
I didn’t know how things are going to turn out for me today exactly, or this week. Extend this to a month or a year, taking into account all the complexity of my life, sometimes it doesn’t feel I’m on control of much! The temptation can be to respond to this uncertainty with anxiety, and attempts to reduce the open-endedness of the situation. An alternative approach is to experience this uncertainty as a wealth of possibilities that I enter into everyday. These possibilities  are pregnant with potential, excitement and wonderment. Rather than trying to shut down and narrow, I can feel myself opening to the wealth of possible experiences.

Is your life a playful game or a mouse trap?
One important context for this is your sense of what life is. Is it like a mouse trap, luring you in and then snapping over your head, waiting to get you? Or is it a game that you can play with a lighter touch, with reasonable expectation that there will be at least as many good things that come your way as difficult ones? Not only this, but in this second type of game even the difficult and challenging things can be good things. They can be openings inviting the possibly of growth, re-invention and new and better things in the medium and long term.
The important thing here is that you can consciously choose to play the latter game, and that opens the door to a whole new world of possibility.

Possibility and self-esteem/self-acceptance
Another important factor in enjoying possibility is your self-concept. Do you view yourself as the sort of person to whom good things happen, and who can reasonably expect fulfillment and well-being in life? When presented with opportunities for fulfillment, are you able to accept them openly, believing you are deserving, or do you (often down unconsciously) reject this as something that is not appropriate for you, that you aren’t deserving or worthy of?
If you are going to enjoy the possibilities that life gives you, you have to be prepared to accept them, and take responsibility for making the most of them. Otherwise, no matter how many are presented to you, the danger is you continually let them pass you by.

The energy, excitement and anticipation of possibility
In meditation it is well worth finding and sitting with the feeling of opening to possibilities in the moment. This includes feeling calm and centred, but in combination with a sense of life’s abundance, of a degree of excitement and anticipation. It can also include opening to the fundamental sense of life being a mystery, and in that sense there being something deeper and larger than ourselves guiding us onto the next adventure.

Living in a world of abundant possibility
Once we have built this state of openness to possibility in meditation, we can then practice making it part and parcel of our approach to daily life. Our world becomes a place of abundance and wealth, and our open-ness to possibility becomes a source of energy for us, feeding us as we move into the unknown.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com   

Watch Toby’s short video on opening to possibility:

 

Saturday 6th & 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow Mini-retreat

Are you interested in learning a form of meditation that will:

  • Help you to get in touch with a deeper level of psychological harmony and wellbeing within yourself?
  • Access new levels of energy and confidence?
  • Discover and heal hidden aspects of your psyche that are currently sabotaging your happiness in daily life and transforming them into something useful and powerful within you?

Read full details

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Overview: What are states of mind, body and heart that, when we cultivate them open us to more energy, more self-empowerment and more enthusiasm, even when we are living in difficult conditions, like during Covid? This unique and new course by Toby introduces seven different ways of meditating, each of which is designed to create a loop of increasing positive energy inside us. The more we do them, the more empowered we feel. These are way to help you feel increasingly dynamic and joyful, as opposed to oppressed and a victim of circumstance.
The ‘mindful skillset’ you will develop can be applied equally to your professional or personal life.

Read full details

 

Saturday 27th February, 6-7pm – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

  • Bring energy and health to our physical body
  • Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
  • Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
  • Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goals

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Saturday 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow –  Mini-retreat

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th February, 6-7pm – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology