Category: Mindful Confidence

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Meditations on the dance of gentleness and courage

Dear Integral Meditators,

“Sometimes we long for strength, but sometimes the very way in which we conceive that strength gets in the way of our finding it. How might it be if we tried to express the courage of gentleness sometimes in our life rather than ‘hard’ strength that is brittle and inflexible?”

Meditations on the dance of gentleness and courage mini-course

Date: Tuesday & Wednesday 28th & 29th July

This week’s Tuesday & Wednesday classes are a two session mini-course.
This course looks at ways of meditating that enable us to bring the qualities of gentleness and courage into a complementary dance together in our lives, in a way that encourages:

  • How to discover your inner strength through gentleness
  • How to become courageous in a way that uses your human vulnerability wisely
  • Meet fear and uncertainty more effectively and find confidence in the face of challenges
  • A way of relating to others and yourself that is strong and kind

There are three ways of participating in the course:

Option 1 – For free: Simply read Toby’s two articles on gentleness and courage:
Recognizing Three Types of Fear, Meditating on three Types of Courage
Mindfulness and gentleness – Three reflections

Option 2: Participate in the Tuesday & Wednesday class online for the complete course for SGD$50. If you can’t make the live sessions, you will be sent the recordings to listen to in your own time.

Option 3: Participate in either one or the other of the Tuesday or Wednesday online sessions for SGD$30

To book your place please contact Toby at info@tobyouvry.com.

In the spirit of gentle courage,

Toby

 

In case you missed last weeks article: Aspects of environmental meditation

Environmental meditation, simply put, is using the different elements of our environment as objects of meditation in order to effect the transformation of our consciousness, and move us into a state of balanced communion with the Earth. It mostly works directly and experientially with what is immediately present in our surroundings. It is one of the most ancient and primal forms of meditation around, and you can find elements of it in both the eastern and western traditions.
Below are a few ways in which you can start to practice environmental meditation…
Read full article here.

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Stress-transformation coaching with Toby

Stress, anxiety, fear, pressure, anger, attachment – Ordinarily we see these states of mind and emotion as negative; things that get in the way of our happiness and well-being, and prevent us from achieving the goals and quality of life that we would like.

But what if there was a way in which we could learn to work with these negative and difficult energies in such a way that we could transform and redirect them, making them sources of positive and empowering energy, helping us to accomplish our goals and awaken to a new level of fulfillment?

Stress transformation coaching with Toby is exactly that; it shows you how you can transform your stress, anxiety and other difficult emotions into forces for the good in your life…
Read full details

 

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classes

Build focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

 

 

At a glance: All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Weekly Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Coming in July – High performance bootcamp: Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Insight Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Mindful Confidence Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

Your first (&most important) relationship

“We project the health or lack of it in our relationship to self onto everything and everyone else.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

The article below explores how to be mindful around our relationship to self, which I always say is our first and most important relationship!

In the spirit of our first relationship,

Toby

PS: If you missed it, check out last weeks article on Matching your expectation with reality or watch my one minute video on the same subject.

Your first (&most important) relationship

When practicing mindfulness in relationships, one important ‘first position’ that I emphasize (in my own practice and also when teaching others) is that your most important relationship is to yourself. If you can get this one right, then it will affect all of your other relationships in a positive way. This is because:

  • We have to spend 24hours a day with ourself. We can escape from our partner, colleagues and kids for a while, but you are stuck with ‘you’ all the time!
  • Anything that is right or wrong in our relationship to ourself we then project onto our relationships with others. We project the health or lack of it in our first relationship onto everything else.

In short, the more solid a relationship you build to yourself, the easier and more successful your relationships with others are likely to be. With this in mind here are some simple (but deep) mindful positions you can take to help improve your relationship to yourself:

  1. Commit to being on your own side – Today are you going to be the one supporting and encouraging yourself to the next level of creative expression in your life, or are you going to be the main thing that is holding you back, keeping you scared? Practice choosing the former rather than the latter!
  2. Listen to yourself – Work at counselling yourself well by listening to the conversation and emotions present within. Practice what it is like to extend empathy and understanding, rather than intolerance and judgment
  3. Appreciate yourself – Make sure that the good things that you are doing for yourself, others and in your life are not going un-noticed and un-valued.
  4. Be honest, don’t dodge the difficult stuff – Don’t run away from the most difficult parts of your relationship to yourself. Practice naming and working with the parts of you that are wounded, resentful, insecure, paranoid and so on. Take responsibility for your own self-healing
  5. Practice seeing yourself from other people’s point of view – Whenever you do this you will see yourself in a new light that is useful and interesting. Don’t get locked soley in the old, familiar ways of viewing yourself
  6. Practice seeing yourself more objectively – Although we can never see ourselves entirely objectively, we can nevertheless practice seeing ourselves more objectively. Seeing yourself impersonally helps you take calmer more objective decisions with regard to how you treat yourself!

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020

Saturday 18th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclass

Learn how you can use mindfulness improve your relationships and relationship skills

Relationships form a major part of our happiness and enjoyment in life, but that can also be difficult, complicated, challenging and confusing. This two-hour masterclass focuses on practical skills to help you get the most out or your relationships, both professional and personal. By changing the way you pay attention, you can change your relationships! You will learn:

Read full details…

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July  7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions
These are meditation classes done monthly around the turn of the new moon that enable us to open to new beginnings, new possibilities and make a fresh start with regard to:

  • Our health
  • Our inner growth
  • And our life’s purpose and future goals

See full details…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of nature

In a sentence: Learn to work consciously with the forces of nature and your environment as well develop powerful meditation states.

There is much concern and talk today about the state of the environment and the relationship of humankind to nature. This is a workshop that will introduce you to simple, ancient meditation techniques to….

Read full details…


Sunday July 19th & 26th, 5-5.50pm – Online Qi gong workout class

This is a Qi gong session that begins with movement, breathing and energy work to thoroughly energize and refresh your body, nervous system and energy meridians  and regenerate your physical, energetic, mental and spiritual being…read full details

Restarts Sunday 19th July – Qi gong energy body activation meditation

About the sessions: These are Qi gong meditation sessions to activate and enhance the flow of ‘qi’ or subtle energy in your body. We will then be using this flow for:

  • Enhancing physical health and healing
  • Increased emotional wellbeing and mental balance
  • Access to deeper, more dynamic meditation states to transform and regenerate your body, mind and soul

Full details of class…

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classes

Build focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

 

Coming soon: High performance bootcamp – Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Are you a high-potential individual who often feels overworked, stressed, sleep-deprived, or mentally and physically exhausted?  Yet, you are expected to be on your A-game everyday, make clear decisions, problem solve, and be fully focused and present for your employer and teams? Do you wonder if performance in your career and your well-being are a zero-sum game, and see your well-being fall to the sidelines under the ever increasing work commitments.

At a glance: All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Weekly Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Ongoing Sundays 6-6.50pm –  Qi gong energy body activation meditation (Livestream)

Saturday 18th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclass

Sunday July 19th, 26th – Qi gong workout class

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July  7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions

Saturday 25th July 10.30am-12noon – ONLINE Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation course ever

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of nature

Coming in July – High performance bootcamp: Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Awareness and insight Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindfulness

Dealing with your anxiety more effectively (Identifying causal anxiety)

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“Working effectively with any type of anxiety means making friends as much as possible with the feeling of anxiety.”
 N
Dear Integral Meditators,
This weeks article looks at a particular type of anxiety, and how we can start to work with it more effectively, enjoy!

In the spirit of acceptance,

Toby

 

 

 

 

Stress-Transformation coaching with Toby 
Stress, anxiety, fear, pressure, anger, attachment – Ordinarily we see these states of mind and emotion as negative; things that get in the way of our happiness and well-being, and prevent us from achieving the goals and quality of life that we would like….full details

Dealing with your anxiety more effectively (Identifying causal anxiety)

In this article I am going to explain a method that gives you greater effectiveness in the face of your anxiety. It is in relation to what is called ‘causal anxiety’. Causal anxiety is anxiety is so named because, at least superficially, it has a clear, tangible cause that we can identify. For example:

  • I am feeling anxious regarding a test result that will come through shorty
  • I am nervous about a speech  that I have to give in front of a group of people
  • I am worried about catching a disease that has been going around

Meeting Causal anxiety with either acceptance or pro-activity
So, with causal anxiety, the position is quite simple. We just ask the question “Am I going to be pro-active in dealing with the challenge I am worried about, or am I simply going to focus on accepting it as it is?” So for example:

  • With my test result, I may simply choose to accept that I’m just going to have to wait for it. There is nothing further I can do, so I make a clear decision to relax and accept that. Note here that this also means accepting the feeling of anxiety that I have, getting ‘comfortable with the discomfort of it’ so to speak. It is unlikely that I will be able to get rid of the feeling of anxiety totally, but in making peace with it and accepting it, I can diminish its disruptive power substantially.
  • Regarding the speech the I have to give, I can respond to the anxiety by choosing to prepare for another half hour, and then practice acceptance. At a certain point of my choosing, I have to make a decision that ‘I have now done enough’, and now can focusing on relaxing and accepting (or if possible releasing) the anxiety.
  • Regarding the disease, I can choose to take all sensible preventative measures; hand washing and so forth, and then just accept that there is some risk, knowing that I have done all that I can do!

So with causal anxiety, I am being clear about my choice to do or not do, and dealing with anxiety that way. As you can see from the examples, your response can be a combination of action and acceptance. The point is that the alleviation of anxiety comes from being clear about what you are going to do about the challenge, and then having done it then practicing letting go and acceptance.

Getting comfortable with the feeling of anxiety
A final point here; working effectively with any type of anxiety means making friends as much as possible with the feeling of anxiety. Whatever the cause, the more we can accept the felt sense of anxiety in the body, the more easily we will be able to work with it. If this feeling is our enemy and adversary, we are generally going to have a tough time with it. This is because, for tender humans like us, feeling a degree of anxiety is often synonymous with feeling alive.

Related article: Finding Your Best Response to Anxiety – An Existential Perspective


Tuesday 10th, Wednesday 11th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

  • Bring energy and health to our physical body
  • Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
  • Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
  • Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goals

Full details of session

Restarts Monday March 23rd, 6.30-8pm – The Men’s group, the path of conscious manhoodHow can you move from coping to thriving in your life as a man? – Much is asked of men in their traditional roles as fathers and sons, partners and husbands, students and teachers, employees and employers. The men’s group is a professionally moderated and confidential forum for men. A forum is a safe place for exploring, learning and sharing the successful perspectives, skills, and strategies… Click here for full details

 

Saturday 14th March, 10.30am-12noon – Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation everIntegral Meditation Asia is happy to provide you with a truly practical and super short (90min) workshop that teaches you:

  • What meditation is and how it works
  • How to start your own effective daily meditation practice with just a five minute a day commitment

Full detail of session

Tues 17th & Weds 18th March – Spring Equinox balancing & renewing meditation

At the spring equinox we can think about the spring and summer periods that lie ahead of us, what our goals and expectations are, and sow the seeds on an inner level of the things that we wish to manifest over the next few months.
Full details of session

 

Saturday 28th March, 2-5.30pm – Meditations for Developing the Language of Your Shadow Self WorkshopBy working with these shadow characters in meditation you will develop the capacity to:

  • Developing a fuller and more intimate understanding of the language that your own shadow self uses to communicate with you
  • Understand different aspects of your shadow self as it relates to different time periods in your life (childhood, puberty, early adulthood etc…)
  • Finding and articulating your shadow as it relates to different areas of our life, for example your relationships, work life, spiritual life and so on.

Full details of session

All upcoming classes and workshops for January 2020

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Tuesday 10th, Wednesday 11th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 14th March, 10.30am-12noon – Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation ever

Tues 17th & Weds 18th March – Spring Equinox balancing & renewing meditation

Restarts Monday March 23rd, 6.30-8pm – The Men’s group, the path of conscious manhood

Saturday 28th March, 2-5.30pm – Meditations for Developing the Language of Your Shadow Self Workshop

Friday, Sat, Sunday 17,18,19th April – The Qi Gong Foundation Program & Program for coaches and trainers 

Starts Saturday 25th April – The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors and Therapists – Creating sustainable high performance and deep wellness

Ongoing  – The Integral Mindfulness & Meditation Online Program, January-July 2020

Integral Meditation AsiaOnline Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Working with the ‘Big Dog’ of your shadow self (Building inner strength)

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“By making friends with the ‘big dog’ of your shadow, a lot of the difficult and challenging parts of yourself that previously you ran away from will cease to feel threatening to you.”
 W
Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article focuses upon how you can build a positive relationship to your shadow self, and experience a greater degree of inner resilience and confidence as a result…beneath it is my video on the topic where you can explore further. Shadow coaching is something I do a lot of, and it never ceases to amaze me the change it makes in people.Then on Saturday morning there is my monthly beginners meditation workshop, followed by an afternoon of Psychic and Psychological self-defence, the details of which I have placed below.

In the spirit of the journey,

Toby

Working with the ‘Big Dog’ of your shadow self (Building inner strength)

The shadow – your ‘wild self’
The shadow is a part of all of our psyches/psychological selves. It is often associated with the wild, instinctive and primal part of who we are. Its energy is often interpreted as aggressive, negative and frightening. This being the case, for many of us the shadow is a repressed part of ourself that we often run away from and bury within our sub-conscious mind. Hence it is our ‘shadow’ self, living in our sub-conscious, unacknowledged by our conscious self.

Your shadow is like a big dog
One way of imagining your shadow is like a big dog, full of power, instincts, libido/sexuality, and aggression (in the neutral sense of the word, meaning could be good or bad aggression).

What happens when you abuse your big dog?
If we are afraid of the dog of our shadow, then we often respond to it with fear, punishing it when it does something wrong. We behave like a tyrannical owner that our big dog learns to distrust and fear. As a result it becomes devious, working to fulfil its needs and wishes behind our back, when we ‘are not looking’. In this way we find ourself experiencing our shadow as an adversary, almost like a demon within us that seems to be trying to sabotage us all the time.

What happens when you train it well
If you build a conscious, positive relationship to your shadow, then this is like becoming a good dog trainer. You take the raw instincts and unruly behaviour of the dog and benevolently direct it. You are fair, and so the dog learns to trust you and love you. As a result, the dog becomes your powerful ally. It still has all the raw power, but it is working for you and with you, rather than against you. All the power of our shadow self becomes available to us to direct, enjoy and use to help us find fulfilment in our life.

Building strength of body heart and mind through working with your shadow
By making friends with the ‘big dog’ of your shadow, a lot of the difficult and challenging parts of yourself that previously you ran away from will cease to feel threatening to you. You will feel more confident and stronger within yourself. Also, your ability to stay steady in the face of the shadow self of others, or within groups of people is also transformed. Relationship situations that you previously experienced as threatening no longer intimidate you.

Check out the video on the big dog of the shadow:

Click this link for information on Toby’s Shadow coaching
Check out Toby’s other shadow articles on his website

Article & Content ©Toby Ouvry 2020, please do not reproduce without permission. info@tobyouvry.com

All upcoming classes and workshops for January 2020

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday 22nd February, 10.30am-12pm – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Saturday 22nd Feb 2-5.30pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence half day workshop

Tuesday 10th March, 7.30-8.30pm – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Friday, Sat, Sunday 24,25,26th April – The Qi Gong Foundation Program & Program for coaches and trainers 

Ongoing – The Men’s group, the path of conscious manhood

Ongoing  – The Integral Mindfulness & Meditation Online Program, January-July 2020

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Awareness and insight creative imagery Energy Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindfulness One Minute Mindfulness Presence and being present Videos

Getting comfortable in your own skin

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“We all want a place where we can feel ‘at home’. We can change house, town or country in order to feel more at home, but the one thing we cant change is our physical body. If we feel at home in our body, then wherever we are in life, we can ‘sit’ in a place where feel comfortable”
W
Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores the importance of being comfortable in your own skin, and how you can start going about becoming so in your daily life! You can watch my video on the same topic HERE.  This weeks Tuesday and Wednesday evening class will be on the same subject.I have also done a new write up and video for my Business coaching offering. If this is something that you are interested in for yourself or for your organisation, then do check it out!

In the spirit of the journey,Toby

Getting comfortable in your own skin

Finding a home in your body
We all want a place where we can feel ‘at home’. We can change house, town or country in order to find a place where we feel more at home, but the one thing we can’t change is our physical body (at least in this particular life!) If we feel at home in our body, then wherever we are in life, we can ‘sit’ in a place where feel comfortable. Getting ‘comfortable in our own skin’ then is a foundational mindfulness skill that continues to give us value the more we cultivate it, wherever we are!

Looking after your physical well-being
On an obvious level, looking after our health is an important part of feeling comfortable in our skin. The better we can sleep, balance our diet and build ‘good energy’ on our body, the easier it is going to be to sit within the presence of our body enjoyably.

Accepting and liking your physical body
On the psychological level, its important to be aware of your relationship to your body. If you don’t like your body, or even ‘hate’ it for not looking the way you want or would like, then its difficult to sit comfortably with it. So, whatever your body looks like, moving towards a space of acceptance and liking of your body is super-important to relaxing and being present with yourself.

Being comfortable with the range of emotions present in your body
Quite often our mind will ‘jump out’ or run away from our body because there are emotions present in it that we aren’t comfortable with (Eg: resentment, anger, sadness etc….). So, learning to hold space benevolently for a wide range of emotions and remain in you body is an important skill. The more comfortable you can get with uncomfortable emotions, the more stable your ability to be at home in your own skin will be.

Being comfortable with your self!
An extension from your previous point, in order to sit and be present in your own skin, you need to like yourself, or at least be working toward self-acceptance. Otherwise your mind will be continually trying to ‘escape’ your own presence, as it is such an uncomfortable place to be! Since your physical body is the place in the present moment where you always encounter yourself, then it’s difficult to be there if you don’t like who you are.

Finding a place to get comfortable 
Cultivating comfort in your own skin takes a bit of practice, so it can be good to have a specific chair or place in your home where you can just take a few minutes to practice. You can practice anywhere, but having a pleasant place that you enjoy can be a good support as you get going.

A short exercise
For a few minutes, simply invite your mind to come home to rest in your physical body. Notice how fundamentally comfortable or not you feel sitting ‘inside your skin’. Notice any resistance you may have, and encourage your mind to gently enjoy resting within the presence of your body. Breathe, relax and get as ‘at home’ as you can. Reasons to escape into your mental world will come up, but for now really emphasize making your body your home, a source of regeneration, well-being and resilience.

In daily life
Notice times in the day when you become uncomfortable in your body. Cultivate an awareness of your body and an ability to get increasingly comfortable in your own skin, even in times of stress or dis-ease.

Related article: Making your body your castle

Watch Toby’s video on getting comfortable in your own skin:

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020.

Mindful Business CoachingThis is a coaching service for executives, small/medium size business owners and entrepreneurs who are seeking to improve four areas of their worklife:

  • Personal stress levels and wellbeing
  • Leadership and creative vision
  • Time and task management
  • Management of people and developing soft skills
  • Click here to read more

Watch Toby talking about his Business coaching:

 

All upcoming classes and workshops for January 2020

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Sunday 9th February, 7.30-8.30pm – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 22nd February, 10.30am-12pm – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Saturday 22nd Feb 2-5.30pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence half day workshop

Friday, Sat, Sunday 20,21,22nd March – The Qi Gong Foundation Program & Program for coaches and trainers 

Ongoing – The Men’s group, the path of conscious manhood

Ongoing  – The Integral Mindfulness & Meditation Online Program, January-July 2020

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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A Mind of Ease Inner vision Integral Meditation Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Motivation and scope Presence and being present Stress Transformation

Mindfully getting outside of your comfort zone

W
“Often, discovering the best that is possible for us in life involves deliberately, soulfully and mindfully getting out of our comfort zone! What can you start with today?”
 W
Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores the relationship between comfort and discomfort, and how to create a complementary relationship between the two. You can also watch my video on the subject: Getting mindfully comfortable in order to get out of your comfort zone.In the spirit of getting comfortable with the uncomfortable,

Toby

Mindfully getting outside of your comfort zone

The ‘improvements’ of contemporary life
If you look at the way in which our life has gotten better as a result of technology, a lot of it has to do with comfort. You can get your favourite restaurant food ordered to your door, you can find information about whatever you want on Google, you can communicate with everyone thru your phone without having to leave your chair. The thing to notice about this is that comfort is not the same thing as greater fulfillment, happiness or well-being. Indeed, many forms of fulfillment and reward in life require and initial risk, or getting out of our comfort zone in order to receive the genuine reward of improved quality of life.
If we don’t watch out, we can get trapped in a subtle addiction to pursuing comfort in the false expectation that it can give us fulfillment on a deeper level, which of course it can’t.

So then, one really useful mindful question to ask ourselves is: “What can I do today to get out of my comfort zone and move towards deeper fulfillment?”
The purpose of this question is to ensure that we don’t get trapped in our comfort zone in a way that denies us the possibility a truly fulfilling, exciting and dynamic life.

Getting physically out of your comfort zone
An obvious and basic place to start is the physical level. Getting out of your comfort zone physically enables us to get fit, build physical skills and abilities, and avoid the consequences of an overly sedentary life.

Getting out of your emotional, mental and relational comfort zone
For many people getting out of their psychological and social comfort zone represents a bigger risk than just getting out of their physical one. Expanding your emotional range, spending time with people that are outside of your normal social circle all requires effort and discomfort. However, the consequent reward, fulfilment, and expansion of possibilities for us often rewards the effort many times over.

Combining genuine comfort and ease with engaging discomfort
Of course this isn’t saying that we shouldn’t  Have good quality periods of ease and restorative comfort in our life. Indeed, I’m writing this on my way back from a deeply enjoyable and ease inducing holiday! The practice here is to dance each day between healthy comfort and healthy discomfort, the goal in mind being to act In a way that brings us as much genuine fulfillment as possible.
Often, discovering the best that is possible for us in life involves deliberately, soulfully and mindfully getting out of our comfort zone! What can you start with today?

Watch Toby’s video on getting mindfully out of your comfort zone here: 

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020.

The Life-fullness Life Coaching Program with Toby

Life-fullness coaching is a unique integration of mindfulness and life-coaching that is designed to help you lead a progressively more awakened life. The essence of the Life-fullness approach is to integrate the different parts of who we are into complementary strengths so that we can really experience ourselves living our life to its fullest…

Watch Toby talking about the  Life-fullness Program:

All upcoming classes and workshops for January 2020

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Starts Monday January 13th, 6.30-8pm – The Men’s group, the path of conscious manhood

The Integral Mindfulness & Meditation Online Program, January-July 2020

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Concentration creative imagery Energy Meditation Integral Awareness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Presence and being present

Strong back, soft front

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“By practicing a physically ‘strong back, soft front’ posture, we can get a feeling of what it is like to be inwardly strong and at the same time gentle on a psychological level.”
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Dear Toby,

This weeks article looks considers how physical posture can invite psychological change, and how you can cultivate real inner strength.

In the spirit of  strength and gentleness,

Toby

Strong back, soft front

Traditional meditation posture involves sitting up straight, with an unsupported back. The head and neck are above the chest and shoulders, chest above the belly, belly sitting above the hips, like a stack of bricks. One reason for this is that meditation is about alertness as much as relaxation. If you lean against something, it may be relaxing, but the danger of your alertness dipping increases. So we can sit upright to cultivate this balance of relaxation and alertness upon which all effective meditation and mindfulness relies.

Soft front, strong back
As you are sitting up straight with a strong back, you can also deliberately soften the front of your body, the chest, belly and face. So you have a soft front, backed up by a strong backbone. This can be a physical posture that reminds us of how to be in life; we can present a gentle, restrained face to the world, because we know we are strong inside. Because we are inwardly strong, we are confident enough to be gentle outside (unless it is appropriate not to be so for a specific reason).

Armoring the front to hide a weak back
Often in life our position is the opposite of strong back, soft front. We feel afraid and insecure on the inside (weak back), and so to compensate we present a strong, armored, even aggressive front to the world to compensate. This affects our sense of who we are, and how other people experience us. By practicing the ‘strong back, soft front’ posture, we can get a bodily feeling of what it is like to be inwardly strong and at the same time gentle on a psychological level.

Practicum
Spend a little time each day sitting with a strong back and soft front. Let your body learn to recognize what this feels like. As you go about your daily activities, experiment with what it is like to feel strong inside and so gentle on the outside. Try talking and acting from this place in your relationships and in the way that you interact with the world. Notice how this changes how you participate in your life, and the opportunities for creative change it opens for you.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.

Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Tuesday and Wednesday 17,18 December – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Stress Transformation

Choosing to be on Your Own Side

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‘Are you for yourself or against yourself?’ 
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Dear Integral Meditators,

Of the articles I have written, this is one of  my favorites.

In the spirit of being on our own sides,

Toby

Choosing to be on Your Own Side

When you take a creative chance in your business and it does not come out ideally, do you berate yourself for being stupid, or do you congratulate yourself for your creative courage and learn from what you did and what happened?

When you are experiencing a difficult emotional state, do you take the time to express support and warmth to yourself or do you just try and bury the emotion and distract yourself from what you are feeling because of the discomfort?

When you are tired do you let the physical fatigue turn into a series of negative thoughts about yourself, your life and those around you, or do you consciously extend support to your tired body and make the effort to create a positive inner dialogue to help cope with the fatigue until you can get some rest?

When you ask someone you fancy out for a date and they say no, do you make a point of feeling good that you had the emotional courage to ask, or do you cringe with self-embarrassment and wallow in self loathing?

Are you for yourself or against yourself? 
This is one of the most productive mindfulness questions to ask yourself, every day. Each day in many ways, in thought and deed, in subtle and not so subtle actions, we are either expressing warmth, support and friendship to ourself, or we are expressing the opposite; coldness, judgment, self-loathing, self-sabotaging, self-isolating and so on.

To be for yourself is not negatively selfish, it is simply to recognize the your most important intimate relationship is ultimately with yourself; you are the one you have to spend 24 hours a day with, if you get your relationship to yourself right you are setting the stage for success in your life on multiple levels.

No one else can make your relationship to yourself right for you, you have to tread the journey to being truly for yourself alone. You can receive help and advice of course (this article pointing the way for example), but the moment to moment effort to be on your own side can only be exerted by you for you.

Today are you going to be the one supporting and encouraging yourself to the next level of creative expression in your life, or are you going to be the main thing that is holding you back, keeping you scared?

Be on your own side, be for yourself, not against youself. You do have a choice, it is up to you.

Related Article: Life-fullness

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.

Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, June 15th, 29th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturday October 19th, 4-5.30pm – Get your meditation pratice started now – The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Weds 30th Oct & Friday 1st Nov, 7.30-8.30pm – Samhain Meditation – Acknowledging the gifts and wounds of our ancestors

Starts Sunday November 3rd – A six week mindfulness course for adults with ADHD

Re-Starts Monday November 4th, 6-7.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness One Minute Mindfulness

Mindful of: Your tone of voice 

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Dear Integral Meditators,

So much of our life is spent communicating, it’s definitely worthwhile investing out time, attention and intelligence to ´craft’ your messages and their tones wisely and benevolently. This weeks article explores some practical ways of doing this!

Final reminder of this Saturdays  Practical introduction to Qi gong workshop, 9.30am-1pm, Tuesday meditation classes re-start next week 😉

In the spirit of tone,

Toby

Mindful of: Your tone of voice 

I have recently come to the end of a three week holiday where we have been travelling in France, Spain and England. As you probably know, holidays can be fun and relaxing, but they can also be quite stressful, as the different personalities of all those traveling run up against each other!
One of the ways that I have focused on mindfulness practice as I have been traveling is to be aware of the tone of my voice as I communicate. I have found this to be a super useful way of managing my own moods, and saying what I want to say in a way that is helpful to my fellow travellers.
Speaking is not just what you say, it’s the way that you say it. Even with very basic words such as ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ here are a huge variety of tones with which you say it that completely change the message and mood.
So, as a mindfulness practice tone of voice can be thought of as consisting of two questions:

  1. ‘What do I want to say?’
  2. ´What is the best way to say what I want to say?’

The first question is about the basic message. The second is about the delivery; what is the tone of voice and way of wording your message that will maximise the chance of it being effective, and giving the best result for everyone concerned? If you spend a few moments before you speak on these two questions, then it’s surprising the changes that you can make for the better.
So much of our life is spent communicating, it’s definitely worthwhile investing out time, attention and intelligence to ´craft’ your messages and their tones wisely and benevolently.

Here are two other areas to pay attention to around tone:
Your tone tells you your mood– Quite often we are not fully aware of our mood or emotional state until we say something, and our tone tells us a lot about what we are feeling. So simply listening to your tone of voice can be a very interesting and useful thing to pay attention to.
Increase your range of positive tones -Get to know what a range of positive tones sound like and practice them. For example, an assertive tone (as opposed to aggressive), loving/caring, light (as opposed to heavy), serious, inquisitive, sincere, calm, or joyful. Try and develop the range of tones that you have available to use consciously.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.

Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, June 15th, 29th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturday 10th August, 2-5.30pm – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing

FOR BEGINNERS: Saturday 24th August, 11-12.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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creative imagery Energy Meditation Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Motivation and scope Stress Transformation

Mindful of your inner and outer wealth – Six practices

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Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article outline six mindfulness practices for creating a feeling of being both inwardly and outwardly wealthy in your life.

We will be doing a meditation on these practice at the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation classes this week.

Finally, a reminder of this weekends workshop: Saturday 11th May, 1:00pm – 4:00pm – Mindful self confidence – Developing your self-confidence, self-belief and self-trust

In the spirit of richness,

Toby

Mindful of your inner and outer wealth – Six practices

In this article I want to outline five simple, enjoyable mindfulness practices for creating the feeling of being both inwardly and outwardly wealthy, and then doing something today to manifest a sense of the richness of your life.

Wealth as friends and your support network – Bring to mind the wealth you have in your life in terms of friends, family and support network. Take some time to appreciate both the people themselves, and yourself for having built these good relationships into your life. Focus on the feeling created in the body, mind and heart that comes from knowing you are wealthy in terms of your relationships.

Wealth as values and purpose – Think of the core values that motivate you, and the goals that you have in your life motivated by these values. It could be as simple as the love with which you raise your child or the drive to change the industry in which you work for the better. Centre your attention upon these values, and the goals they motivate you towards. Feel the richness of your life in terms of value and meaning.

Material wealth – Bring to mind the wealth and resources that you have. Allow yourself to feel grateful and enthusiastic for what you have, rather than what you haven’t got in terms of material possessions!

Your health – Bring to mind the health that you have in your body. Look for and dwell upon a feeling of appreciation for the health and wellbeing that you posess.

Wealth as competency – Think about the skills that you have, the competencies that you can use to create value and wealth, both inner and outer in your life. Dwell upon the feeling of being wealthy in the sense of having skills. Then ask yourself the question: ‘How can I use my skills today to create greater wealth, both inner and outer in my life?’ Let the answer come back to you. Then decide on one thing that you can do today to increase your experience of wealth and richness!

Article © Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com   

All Courses at Integral Meditation Asia 

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Monday 6.30-7.20 & Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, May 11th & 18th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturday 11th May, 1:00pm – 4:00pm – Mindful self confidence – Developing your self-confidence, self-belief and self-trust

Tuesday 14th & Wednesday 15th May – Wesak meditation on compassion

FOR BEGINNERS: Saturday 18th May, 11-12.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology