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Balanced self-awareness, mindful self-consciousness

“Balanced self-awareness is the foundation of most other healthy psychological capacities, so it is well worth being consistent and persistent around”

Dear <<First Name>>,

This week’s article looks at self-awareness as an object of mindfulness; why it is important to have the right type of self-awareness, and how to begin cultivating it consistently.

In the spirit of self-awareness,  

Toby
 


Balanced self-awareness, mindful self-consciousness
 
Often mindfulness is associated with increased self-awareness. Implicit in this might be the assumption that all self-awareness is good self-awareness. This is something worth noting, as it is not necessarily the case.
 
Imbalanced or neurotic self-awareness
 
Here are a few examples of ways in which self-awareness can be unhelpful and/or work against us:

  • We could be overly self- aware, in a way that is debilitating or anxiety stimulating. For example, in social situations we could be excessively concerned about what other people may be thinking of us or how we look
  • We could be self-aware with non-acceptance and neurotic intention. By this I mean we can be self-aware, but unhappy with who we are, wishing we were someone else, possessing a different physical appearance or character. This self-awareness produces conflict and discomfort
  • We can be self-aware in a very judgmental or aggressive way, obsessing about mistakes made, or ways in which we are ‘not good enough’ or a ‘fake’
  • We could be self-aware, but projecting the past and future onto the present moment, so that who and what we see is not a realistic image of the person that is actually there

In all the above cases, an element of self-awareness is present, but it is not helping us, and not enjoyable. If our habitual self-awareness is like this, then then quite naturally we are then going to try and avoid self-awareness when we can, because it is such a difficult experience. We could spend our time flip-flopping between neurotic self-awareness and desperate attempts to distract ourselves and become less self-aware!

Balanced mindful self-awareness

Here are some characteristics of what balanced self-awareness looks like:

  • To be self-aware as an observer. By this I mean that part of good self-awareness is that we are merely aware, with a healthy degree of curious objectivity.
  • To be self-aware with acceptance and kind intention. By this I mean there is a deliberate effort to be at peace with the person we are in the moment, supportive of them and not at war with them. To be supportive of ourselves means to extend a basic kind and caring intention to ourselves, making this an integral part of our basic self-consciousness
  • With compassionate judgment. Here I mean that the inner commentary that goes with our self-awareness can express discernments and judgments, but their nature is supportive and caring, consistent with the kindness and caring intention.  
  • Finally, our self-awareness should be on purpose, deliberate and in the present moment. On purpose means we are conscious of the quality of our self-awareness, making it in-line with the characteristics mentioned above. In the present means being with the self or person that we are in the here and now, rather than lost in past selves or ideas of our future selves unconsciously.

 
There are four characteristics of balanced self-awareness that I mention above. In your own practice you can take one or two of these at a time, becoming familiar with the feel of them, and making them gradually habitual and intuitive. If we can make our self-awareness balanced, then we will start to enjoy it and trust it. When this happens, it becomes natural to want to be more self-aware, because good things come of it. Balanced self-awareness is really the foundation of almost all other healthy psychological capacities, so it is well worth being consistent and persistent around!
 
Related articleWhat is self-awareness?
© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com



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Making your physical awareness balanced & whole

“When our physical awareness is balanced and whole, intuitively our sense of who we are starts to take on a more complete feeling”

Dear Integral Meditators,

In the article below I look at the link between physical, sensory awareness and our sense of overall wholeness in life. If you enjoy the article, we will be exploring it in the Tuesday & Wednesday meditation session, so do feel free to join us!

In the spirit of wholeness & balance, 

Toby

 



Sessions this week:

Ongoing, Tuesday/Wednesday evening’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Meditating with the power of intention – An eleven module course

Saturday 26th October, 9.30am-12.30pm – Meditation & Mindfulness for Creating a Mind of Ease, Relaxed Concentration and Positive Intention

Saturday October 26th, 5-6pm Singapore time – Engaged mindfulness & meditation online class : What is self-awareness?



Making your physical awareness balanced & whole
 
This article explores mindfulness for creating a more well-rounded and balanced physical awareness. On of the side effects of this is a more balanced overall awareness, including psychological and spiritual.
 
The present imbalance
For most people, their awareness and sense of space focuses on what is in front of them. This is natural because your eyes are in the front of your head and look forward. When you focus on something you turn forwards it and then look at what is in front of you. So, most of the time our attention extends like a narrow cone out in front, excluding the our potential range of awareness to this narrow zone.
 
The full range
Our full range of physical awareness of course extends 360° around us:

  • To our left and right
  • In front and behind
  • Above and below

In terms of balancing our awareness, a very simple mindful ‘form’ consists of sensing into our full range of directional awareness, and experiencing ourself in the centre of that. Sitting standing or walking you can:

  • Sense to your left and right, extending your awareness each way. Initially you can do it one after the other, then put them together, sensing left and right simultaneously. You can look left and right at first if you like, but then practice using your body itself; sense left with the left side of your body, the skin of your arms, legs and sides. Then to the right with the right side of the body
  • Similarly, do this with the front and back. With the front of your body, practice sensing into what lies in front of you not just using your eyes, but with your chest, belly, and hips. Feel into what is in front of you. Then working with your back, and the back of your head, neck and legs, sensing into what is behind you
  • You can do the same thing with your Above and below; sensing into what is beneath you with the soles of your feet, and the crown of your head

 
Breathing in and out of centre
 
Once you get used to sensing the directions individually and in pairs, you can put them together, sensing the totality of your field of physical awareness. If you then imagine a point of energy in the centre of your chest that is your bodies inner centre, you can practice breathing into your centre and as you inhale, and breathing awareness out into the six directions as you exhale. If I am doing it outside I like to breathe out to the horizon as I exhale, gathering it in again as I inhale.
 
 
Non-conceptiality, peace and psychological wholeness
 
One of the side effects of practicing this directional, physical awareness is that we become a lot more sensory, physical and non-conceptual. We stop excessive thinking and arrive naturally wherever we happen to be, landing stably in a balanced manner in the place we are in.
Another benefit is, because our physical awareness is balanced and whole, our overall sense of our self starts to feel more rounded and whole. Intuitively our sense of who we are starts to take on a more complete feeling. When we start to think from this feeling of wholeness and balance, we start to notice our thinking changes for the better, mimicking its structure from the feeling of wholeness in our habitual physical awareness.
 
You can use directional awareness as a way of moving into deeper meditation in formal practice. Or we can simply drop into it regularly in daily life to ground, centre and connect to wholeness. Our sense of how we operate in space is fundamental, so affecting it for the better in this way can have a profound effect upon us if we do it regularly!
 
Related articles:
Finding your spiritual, physical home
Aspects of environmental meditation


© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


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The world as an organism

Dear Integral Meditators,

This week’s article looks at how we can relate to the world an our environment mindfully in a way where we feel like we belong and where we can actively participate. I hope you enjoy it!

In the spirit of organismic connection, 

Toby

 

The world as an organism
 
In the Taoist and Buddhist traditions, particularly in China and Japan, the concept of the world and how it works is very ‘organismic’. By this I mean that the way the world exists is like a living organism, as opposed to say a top-down hierarchy. Rather than everything following the rule of the leader, or God, or the Queen, things kind of ‘do themselves’. For example, you don’t have to make a conscious choice to metabolize your food or regenerate your cells after every meal. Rather your body does it by itself. This is because it, and you are an organism. Taoism sees the world like that.
Many environmental movements and philosophies today have also adopted this view, relating to the Planet as ‘Gaia’, where everything is connected to everything else like cells in the body of an organism.
 
Yourself as a cell in the organism
 
So then, if the world is an organism, what is your relationship to it? The answer is something like you are born from the organism and are a natural part of it, like a cell in your body. Like the cell, you participate in the life of the organism, and your behaviour contributes to and effects the organism as a whole.
 
 
Participating in & with the organism
 
The reality is that we are already interacting with the world, like a cell on a body. However, much of this participation is currently unconscious, so we are not deriving the nourishment and fulfilment we could be by doing it consciously. Mindful participation in the world-as-organism aims to help us access that nourishment. So, what is it that we can participating in specifically?
 
Four spheres and six directions

The four spheres are Earth, Moon, Sun and stars, the basic ‘spheres’ of our world and environment. We also exist within the six directions – above, below, in front, behind, left and right. I have looked at these in some depth in a previous article.
 
Four elements & four kingdoms

Another central aspect of your environment is the four elements, earth, water, air and fire. These exist both within your body and around you in the environment.
‘Inter-being’ with the four elements are the four kingdoms; human, animal, plant, and mineral.
We share the body of our planet with the four kingdoms, and each of these contain beings (other cells in the body) that consist of the four elements in different combinations.
 
Walking or sitting participation

Go for a walk, or sit outside. Notice the different aspects of the four kingdoms and elements in the landscape. Notice how you share and exchange energy with them. For example:

  • How the air in your lungs interacts and exchanges with the sky and the atmosphere
  • How the leaves of the plants around you contain water, like your body does
  • How the warmth in your body resonates with the sun
  • How the rocks are strong and solid, like your bones
  • How some animals and plants are more airy (Like birds, obviously), some fiery, watery or earthy. Commune with them as fellow elemental beings existing like you, cells within the body of the Earth

 
You are a cell in the body of life, communing & interacting with the other cells, all expressions of the one body.
 
Related articles:
Aspects of environmental meditation
Born from Life, not into it
Integrating reality & symbolic reality


© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


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Born from Life, not into it

“What if, rather than being an intruder into life, we relate to ourself as being born from life, & belonging to Life?”

Dear Integral Meditators,

How we conceive our relationship to life is fundamental to how we experience it. This week’s article looks at how to work with this domain in mindfulness & through contemplation.

Heads up for the the Cultivating your Nirvana, or inner freedom mini retreat on the morning of this Saturday the 12th, & for the Meditation & Mindfulness for Creating a Mind of Ease, Relaxed Concentration and Positive Intention workshop on Saturday 26th.


In the spirit of Life,

Toby
 


Born from Life, not into it

One of my main informal objects of meditation for the last few weeks has been the distinction between being born into life and being born from it. There are several significant changes in perception that this invites that I think are worth sharing.   

The challenge of alienation
If our sense of being born is that of being born into life, it is very easy for that to give rise to a sense of separateness from our environment and the place we inhabit. ‘Born into’ can have the connotation of being like an alien or an asteroid landing on the planet, like a foreign entity in a strange world. There is a sense of fundamental unrelatedness to the place we find ourself. This conception then opens us to a feeling of existential anxiety, of being threatened and aggressed by our surroundings, and where we must carve out our space despite of our lack of belonging.   

Being born from
What if, rather than being an intruder into life, we relate to ourself as being born from life, and belonging to and in Life? In terms of the truth of it, there is no question of this. Our body was literally conceived of by our parents, who in turn were born from their parents and their bodies. You can trace this all the way back through the species of animals and plants to life being born in the ocean. As a unit of life we emerged from life, life gives rise to life.

A wave from the ocean
Thinking like this we start to relate to ourself as a natural extension of life, emerging from Life at birth, and returning back to Life at death (Life capital L to denote Life as a principle and underlying energy). Thought of this way life and death are not seen as enemies; we emerge from Life as an expression of Life at birth like a wave from the ocean. When we die our life simply merges back into Life, like a wave back into the ocean. It is a natural, smooth, seamless continuum. Changing our relationship to life like this, we then significantly change our relationship to death.

An apple from a tree
Another way of relating to being born from Life is that we realize our relationship to it is like that of an apple or a leaf to an apple tree. The apple emerges from the Life of the tree itself, not as something separate from the tree. The life of the tree gives rise to the apple. The apple arises from the tree itself, in the same way that the tree came from the life in the apple that it grew from.
You are like the apple being born from the apple tree. The life in you is a part of Life, you are an expression of Life, and Life is you.

No room for impostor syndrome
Relating to yourself as being born from Life, an expression of Life, there is a sense of belonging to Life, being a part of Life, being deeply at home in Life. There is no sense of not belonging where you are, not being appropriate to Life, of somehow being ‘in the wrong place’. You are in fact exactly where you are supposed to be. You belong here as much as anything or anyone else.
The things that you are offered in and by Life you are deserving of, there isn’t even a question of that.

Being born from and (dying) merging back into Life.
A wave arising from and merging back into the ocean.
An apple arising from an apple tree.
You belong absolutely, and you are at home, truly.

Related articleTrees, birds & Octopuses – Achieving harmony by letting be

© Toby Ouvry 2024, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


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Integral Meditation Asia

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