Tag: meditation

Matching your expectation with reality (the sleeping or waking baby)

Post author By Toby
Post date July 11, 2020

“How can I align my expectations and my reality in this situation?”

Dear Toby,

There are plenty of ways of building your inner peace and resilience, the article below explores one that I’ve found to be very important over the years! You can also watch my short video on the subect here.

Heads up for the Mindful relationships masterclass on the 18th of July, can be participated in from anywhere in the world.

In the spirit of alignment,

Toby

Matching your expectation with reality (the sleeping or waking baby)

On a practical level I find my peace of mind depends a lot on aligning my expectations with my reality. If I can do this, then my sense of inner calm and peace remains resilient. If on the other hand my expectations and my reality clash, then that is a recipe for inner conflict.
Here is a simple example: At the moment I have a one-month old baby, so I have to get up a couple of times a night to feed her. Last night, both my feeds were very smooth; she woke up, I fed her, she hiccuped a little, but then drifted off to sleep quickly, and so then could I.
Tonight, I have exactly the same routine, there is a danger however. That danger is that, now that last night went so well, I may have an expectation that tonight will go just as smoothly. If tonight I expect my baby to behave just as well as she did last night, and then she doesn’t fall asleep, is cranky or otherwise fussy, then my expectation will be frustrated, and my inner stability upset.
In reality I have to go into tonight thinking that it may be an easy night, or it may be a tough one. I need to treat it as if I were doing it for the first time, and not let my expectations get ahead of me. That way, I can face whatever happens in reality as stably and calmly as possible. Because my expectation and my reality are aligned, then I can face what comes with a mindfully unified front!
Of course, you can apply this principle to all other life situations. The essential mindful question here is:

“How can I align my expectations and my reality in this situation?”

If you can answer this question successfully, then your chances of both success, effectiveness and enjoyment are optimized, even in stressful situations.

Watch Toby’s one minute video on matching your expectations with reality:

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020

Saturday 18^th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclassLearn how you can use mindfulness improve your relationships and relationship skills

Relationships form a major part of our happiness and enjoyment in life, but that can also be difficult, complicated, challenging and confusing. This two-hour masterclass focuses on practical skills to help you get the most out or your relationships, both professional and personal. By changing the way you pay attention, you can change your relationships! You will learn:

Read full details…

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July 7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions
These are meditation classes done monthly around the turn of the new moon that enable us to open to new beginnings, new possibilities and make a fresh start with regard to:

Our health
Our inner growth
And our life’s purpose and future goals

See full details…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with TobyAre you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of natureIn a sentence: Learn to work consciously with the forces of nature and your environment as well develop powerful meditation states.

There is much concern and talk today about the state of the environment and the relationship of humankind to nature. This is a workshop that will introduce you to simple, ancient meditation techniques to….

Read full details…

Sunday July 19th & 26th, 5-5.50pm – Online Qi gong workout class

This is a Qi gong session that begins with movement, breathing and energy work to thoroughly energize and refresh your body, nervous system and energy meridians and regenerate your physical, energetic, mental and spiritual being…read full details

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July 7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions

These are meditation classes done monthly around the turn of the new moon that enable us to open to new beginnings, new possibilities and make a fresh start with regard to:

Our health
Our inner growth
And our life’s purpose and future goals

Full details…

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classesBuild focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

Coming in July: High performance bootcamp – Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Are you a high-potential individual who often feels overworked, stressed, sleep-deprived, or mentally and physically exhausted? Yet, you are expected to be on your A-game everyday, make clear decisions, problem solve, and be fully focused and present for your employer and teams? Do you wonder if performance in your career and your well-being are a zero-sum game, and see your well-being fall to the sidelines under the ever increasing work commitments.

At a glance: All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Weekly Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Ongoing Sundays 6-6.50pm – Qi gong energy body activation meditation (Livestream)

Saturday 18^th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclass

Sunday July 19th, 26th – Qi gong workout class

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July 7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions

Saturday 25th July 10.30am-12noon – ONLINE Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation course ever

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of nature

Coming in July – High performance bootcamp: Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindset

Awareness and insight Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindfulness Presence and being present

Five aspects of high-performance mindfulness

Post author By Toby
Post date July 6, 2020

“Committing to being self-aware, and really knowing and understanding how you function is a primary skill”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article offers a few thoughts on mindfulness and sustainable high performance.

In the spirit of the journey,

Toby

Five aspect of high-performance mindfulness

Over the years much of my mindfulness offering in the corporate field has come under the title “Mindfulness for sustainable high-performance”. What it aims to do is to help clients operate at their peak not just today, or this week, but this year, over the next five years, over the next couple of decades. My aim is to help you retain your energy, enthusiasm and capacity for meaningful, creative work without burning out. With this in mind here are five aspects of high-performance mindfulness that might interest you. If you apply them will help you raise the bar both at work and in any chosen domain of your life.

Self-Awareness
Your ability to self-regulate in general, and apply high performance mindfulness methods in particular depends upon your self-knowledge. So committing to being self-aware, and really knowing and understanding how you function is a primary skill. “What is going on within me physically, emotionally and mentally?” is a good question to ask yourself often. “Based upon what I notice about myself, what would be a good thing to focus upon next?” is a good question to follow up with!

Concentration/Mindful-flow
Learn to balance focus with relaxation. High-performance occurs in a context where we are relaxed enough for our natural intelligence to remain functional and optimized. Focus without relaxation leads to sub-par performance in the short term and burn-out in the long term. There are multiple nuanced applications of this principle in high-performance mindfulness.

Non-striving/ergonomic effort
Like quality of concentration, quality of effort is important. With H-P mindfulness we learn to engage in our tasks with the minimum necessary effort to do them well, no more and no less!

Appreciation
In order to keep achieving sustainably and in a balanced way, it’s good to dwell regularly with appreciation upon the good things that we have achieved. Pausing and feeling good about what we have done helps us to feel enthusiasm, and appetite for the next thing, and the next and the next!

Living consciously & intentionally
This final aspect of H-P mindfulness is learning to integrate the four skills above and apply them to our goals. “What is it that I need to focus upon next?” is a question that we can use to prompt the next mindful activity, and take us in the direction that we want to go in order to achieve our goals.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2020, please do not reproduce without permission. Contact info@tobyouvry.com

Saturday 18^th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclass

Learn how you can use mindfulness improve your relationships and relationship skills

Read full details…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of nature

In a sentence: Learn to work consciously with the forces of nature and your environment as well develop powerful meditation states.

Read full details…

Sunday July 19th & 26th, 5-5.50pm – Online Qi gong workout class

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July 7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions

These are meditation classes done monthly around the turn of the new moon that enable us to open to new beginnings, new possibilities and make a fresh start with regard to:

Our health
Our inner growth
And our life’s purpose and future goals

Full details…

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classes

Build focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

Coming in July: High performance bootcamp – Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

At a glance: All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Weekly Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Ongoing Sundays 6-6.50pm – Qi gong energy body activation meditation (Livestream)

Sunday 5th July, 6-7pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 18^th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclass

Sunday July 19th, 26th – Qi gong workout class

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July 7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions

Saturday 25th July 10.30am-12noon – ONLINE Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation course ever

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of nature

Coming in July – High performance bootcamp: Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags high performance mindfulness, integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore

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Environmental & relationship meditation, plus schedule for July!

Post author By Toby
Post date June 30, 2020

Dear Integral Mediators,

You can find below all the details of classes and sessions for July, both Online and live. The next event is the Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session on the 5th July, but as you can see below there is a lot of variety this month!

In the spirit of the journey,

Toby

In case you missed the article last week: What do you mean by ‘a distraction?’ (Living your life on purpose)

Here was a question that I was recently asked: “Based on your experience, what are some things people are usually distracted by that they don’t recognise as forms of distraction?”
Here are a few ways in which we can be distracted without realizing it…read full article here

Sunday 5th July, 6-7pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

Bring energy and health to our physical body
Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goals

Read full details here

Saturday 18^th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclassLearn how you can use mindfulness improve your relationships and relationship skills

Read full details…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with TobyAre you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of nature

In a sentence: Learn to work consciously with the forces of nature and your environment as well develop powerful meditation states.

Read full details…

Sunday July 19th & 26th, 5-5.50pm – Online Qi gong workout class

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July 7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions

These are meditation classes done monthly around the turn of the new moon that enable us to open to new beginnings, new possibilities and make a fresh start with regard to:

Our health
Our inner growth
And our life’s purpose and future goals

Full details…

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classesBuild focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

Coming in July: High performance bootcamp – Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

At a glance: All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Weekly Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Ongoing Sundays 6-6.50pm – Qi gong energy body activation meditation (Livestream)

Sunday 5th July, 6-7pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 18^th July, 4-6pm – Mindful relationships masterclass

Sunday July 19th, 26th – Qi gong workout class

Tues 21st July 7.30-8.30pm, Weds 22nd July 7.30-8.3pm – Monthly new moon, new beginnings visualization and envisioning sessions

Saturday 25th July 10.30am-12noon – ONLINE Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation course ever

Saturday 25th July, 2.30-5.30pm – Environmental meditation masterclass – Working consciously with the forces of nature

Coming in July – High performance bootcamp: Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Integral Meditation AsiaOnline Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation class, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness class, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation

Concentration Integral Meditation Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Breathing Mindfulness Qi gong

Meditating like a baby – Six breathing meditations

Post author By Toby
Post date June 22, 2020

“Consciously make your breathing as soft, even and harmonious as you can, and your mind will settle more quickly in meditation”

Dear Integral Meditators,

Everyone knows that breathing is an important part of meditation, and there are many ways to do it. The article below explores six different techniques you can try, as well as how to meditate for longer time periods.

In the spirit of the next breath,

Toby

Meditating like a baby – Six breathing meditations

Breathing meditation is something that, if you do it well can provide you with a wealth of benefits. In particular, if you use it for your longer meditations it can help you connect relatively easily to states of body, heart and mind that are both blissful and insightful. Here are six types of breathing meditation that you can use and enjoy:

Natural breathing – Give your body permission to breathe in the way that it needs to breathe in order to move towards balance and harmony. Then just keep your attention on the breathing as your body intelligence does what it needs to do to re-balance by using different breathing patterns.
Belly breathing – Breathe slightly deeper than you would usually, and send the air down into the bottom of your lungs as you begin your inhalation. If you do this you will notice your belly moving outward 2-3cms as you inhale, and back to resting position as you exhale. Focus on this belly movement as you breathe.
Incremental breathing – Place 2-3 short pauses in your inhalation in order to energize your body mind, then breathe out evenly and smoothly. To relax more deeply reverse this; as you exhale insert 2-3 short pauses, whilst inhaling smoothly and evenly.
Beautiful breathing – When are in deep meditation, your breathing naturally becomes soft, smooth, even and ‘beautiful’. Counter-intuitively, you can move more rapidly toward a deep meditation state by mimicking the pattern of the ‘beautiful breathing’; Consciously make your breathing as soft, even and harmonious as you can, and your mind will settle more quickly in meditation.
Breathing for releasing – As you breathe in acknowledge and feel the stress, tension in your body-mind. As you breathe our practice releasing it. This can accelerate your ability to move from a state of tension to a state of conscious, alert relaxation.
Breathing for particular flow states – Select a quality or state that you want to cultivate, for example love, playfulness or confidence. Having generated the quality, as you inhale open your body to the experience, as you breathe our relax into it. Use the rhythm of the breathing to set up a focused ‘flow state’ with that quality or state.

Pacing yourself like a baby – How to meditate for more than 20minutes without getting tired.
You can use any of the above breathing meditations to do longer meditation sessions. The key with longer meditation sessions is not to try to hard at the beginning, and find yourself mentally exhausted after only 15-20mins. I have a three-week-old baby right now. She feeds for about half an hour. During that time she will ‘suck, suck, suck’ for a while, then she will rest. When ready to start sucking again off she goes. The whole session is sucking with regular rest periods. Similarly, if you are meditating for 20mins or more, when you feel yourself getting tired, just relax your concentration for a few moments, rest, and then when ready continue. When you resume, you can pick up the momentum that you already have built in the meditation, so you aren’t ‘starting from the beginning’. This is a skillful way of meditating effectively and enjoyably for longer periods. Go deep without burning out!

Article © Toby Ouvry 2020, please do not reproduce without permission. Contact info@tobyouvry.com

Saturday 27th June, 2.30-5.30pm – Breathing meditation livestream masterclass

Learn a multi-faceted breathing meditation practice that helps you grow and learn in the face of life’s challenges, and connect you to deep inner stability.

Many mindfulness and meditation techniques use the breathing. However, with only superficial understanding meditation on the breathing can easily become stagnant, mechanical and, after a while boring! This masterclass teaches six complementary breathing techniques that will help you to…
Full details of session

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Sunday June 21st & 28th, 5-5.50pm – Online Qi gong workout class

Sunday 5th July, 6-7pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

Bring energy and health to our physical body
Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goals

Read full details

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classes

Build focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

Coming in July: High performance bootcamp – Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Weekly Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Ongoing Sundays 6-6.50pm – Qi gong energy body activation meditation (Livestream)

Saturday 20th June 10.30am-12noon – ONLINE Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation course ever

Saturday 27th June, 2.30-5.30pm – Breathing meditation livestream masterclass

Sunday June 21st, 28th – Qi gong workout class

Sunday 5th July, 6-7pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Coming in July – High performance bootcamp: Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags breathing meditation, integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation in singapore, Mindful Breathing, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore, mindfulness meditation

Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Mindfulness Presence and being present Using the Energy of Negative Emotions

Mindfulness around emotions

Post author By Toby
Post date June 14, 2020

“The first thing to be mindful of around emotions is that they are important. If you feel good, then very often you experience your life as good”

Dear Integral Meditators,

What are the most important things to be mindful of in order to increase your emotional intelligence? The article below explores this subject!

In the spirit of emotional flow,

Toby

Mindfulness for emotional intelligence

What is the relationship between mindfulness and emotional intelligence? And how can we use mindfulness to increase our enjoyment of emotions? Below are five aspects of emotional mindfulness that I consider fundamental. If you get good at them will naturally help you increase your EQ, or ability to engage and deploy emotions effectively.

Valuing your emotional state – The first thing to be mindful of around emotions is that they are important. If you feel good, then very often you experience your life as good. Often we spend a lot of time trying to fix our life in other ways, while neglecting to take care of the emotional states that can make our life fun, compelling and worthwhile!

Positive feeling makes positive thinking easy! – The way to think can determine the way in which you feel. Equally, the way you feel powerfully influences the way in which you think. It is easy to ‘think positive’ if you know how to get into a mood or emotional state where you are feeling optimal.

Consolidating your emotional strengths – An important part of emotional mindfulness is to notice positive and enjoyable emotions that you can already generate because you are already familiar with them. If you can identify these and deliberately spend more time engaging with them, then your emotional strength is going to increase naturally and easily.

Working with difficult emotions more effectively – If you can work effectively with difficult emotions when they arise, flowing with them rather than fighting or being a victim of them, then this can really change your life. Relaxing into, making friends with, accepting and not being intimidated (by them) are all ways to become more effective when challenging emotions arise.

Increasing your emotional range – Why stick with your familiar range of emotions? Why not deliberately play around with generating emotions that you are not familiar with, that could value add to your life? This is the creative dimension of emotional intelligence; gently pushing yourself into unfamiliar territory with regard to your feelings!

Questions to stimulate your own mindfulness around emotions:
What is my emotional state right now?
What emotion that I am already familiar with can help me in this situation?
What emotions do I habitually find most intimidating or difficult? What if I tried to work with them, rather than against them?
What emotion that I am not familiar with could I try generating more often?

Article © Toby Ouvry 2020, please do not reproduce without permission. Contact info@tobyouvry.com

Saturday 20th June, 3-5pm – Mindfulness for emotional intelligence masterclass

This masterclass will lead you on an experiential journey to:

Understand what feelings, moods and emotions are and how to build an effective relationship to them
How to consolidate and expand your existing emotional strengths
How to deal with difficult and challenging emotions, and even turn them to your advantage
How to increase the diversity/range of emotions that are available to you for enjoyment, pleasure and life-effectiveness!

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Saturday 20th June, 10.30am-12noon – ONLINE Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation course ever

This is a truly practical and super short (90min) workshop that teaches you:

What meditation is and how it works
How to start your own effective daily meditation practice with just a five minute a day commitment
Provides you not only with the workshop but also with support materials; MP3 meditation recordings (1×15 minute and 3x 5 minute), short articles and diagrams to help you keep meditating after the workshop.

Read full details

Sunday 21st June, 6-7pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation (Livestream)

The Summer Solstice (Called by the Celts ‘Alban Hefin’, or ‘the Light of Summer’) is the high point of summer in the northern hemisphere, the point of the Suns maximum power in the year, & the longest day. It is a good time to attune the life-force in the earth & creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with our own inner power, solar confidence & expressive self.

Full details of session

Saturday 27th June, 2.30-5.30pm – Breathing meditation livestream masterclass

Learn a multi-faceted breathing meditation practice that helps you grow and learn in the face of life’s challenges, and connect you to deep inner stability.

Sunday June 21st & 28th, 5-5.50pm – Online Qi gong workout class

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classes

Build focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Weekly Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Ongoing Sundays 6-6.50pm – Qi gong energy body activation meditation (Livestream)

Saturday 20th June 10.30am-12noon – ONLINE Get your meditation practice started now – The shortest & most time effective meditation course ever

Saturday 20th June, 3-5pm – Mindfulness for emotional intelligence masterclass

Sunday 21st June, 6-7pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation (Livestream)

Saturday 27th June, 2.30-5.30pm – Breathing meditation livestream masterclass

Sunday June 21st, 28th – Qi gong workout class

Sunday 5th July, 6-7pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation AsiaOnline Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

Tags emotional intelligence, emotional mindfulness, integral meditation, integral mindfulness, meditation, meditation and emotions, meditation in singapore, mindfulness, mindfulness in Singapore

Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Stress Transformation

Choosing to be on Your Own Side

Post author By Toby
Post date October 15, 2019

‘Are you for yourself or against yourself?’

Dear Integral Meditators,

Of the articles I have written, this is one of my favorites.

In the spirit of being on our own sides,

Toby

Choosing to be on Your Own Side

When you take a creative chance in your business and it does not come out ideally, do you berate yourself for being stupid, or do you congratulate yourself for your creative courage and learn from what you did and what happened?

When you are experiencing a difficult emotional state, do you take the time to express support and warmth to yourself or do you just try and bury the emotion and distract yourself from what you are feeling because of the discomfort?

When you are tired do you let the physical fatigue turn into a series of negative thoughts about yourself, your life and those around you, or do you consciously extend support to your tired body and make the effort to create a positive inner dialogue to help cope with the fatigue until you can get some rest?

When you ask someone you fancy out for a date and they say no, do you make a point of feeling good that you had the emotional courage to ask, or do you cringe with self-embarrassment and wallow in self loathing?

Are you for yourself or against yourself?
This is one of the most productive mindfulness questions to ask yourself, every day. Each day in many ways, in thought and deed, in subtle and not so subtle actions, we are either expressing warmth, support and friendship to ourself, or we are expressing the opposite; coldness, judgment, self-loathing, self-sabotaging, self-isolating and so on.

To be for yourself is not negatively selfish, it is simply to recognize the your most important intimate relationship is ultimately with yourself; you are the one you have to spend 24 hours a day with, if you get your relationship to yourself right you are setting the stage for success in your life on multiple levels.

No one else can make your relationship to yourself right for you, you have to tread the journey to being truly for yourself alone. You can receive help and advice of course (this article pointing the way for example), but the moment to moment effort to be on your own side can only be exerted by you for you.

Today are you going to be the one supporting and encouraging yourself to the next level of creative expression in your life, or are you going to be the main thing that is holding you back, keeping you scared?

Be on your own side, be for yourself, not against youself. You do have a choice, it is up to you.

Related Article: Life-fullness

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.

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Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

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Going from clinging on to enjoying (Attachment to appreciation)

Post author By Toby
Post date June 4, 2018

Dear Integral Meditators,

What is your relationship to attraction? The article below offers a few thoughts on how you can go about enjoying and appreciating that which you find attractive without clinging or getting unhealthily attached! In short, how to transform attachment into appreciation!

And on the theme of ‘stress transformation’ see the coaching offer below!

In the spirit of pleasure and appreciation,

Toby

Stress Transformation Coaching special offer:
Up until Friday 15^th June there is a special offer on Toby’s Stress transformation coaching service. Three x 1hour packages are on a 15% special offer (a saving of $95). Contact info@tobyouvry.com for full details.
Stress transformation coaching with Toby is exactly that; it teaches you how you can transform your stress, anxiety and other difficult emotions into forces for the good in your life. The coaching focuses upon:

Getting to know and understand the negative or conflicting energy and emotion in your life more deeply and intimately, seeing its potential value
Developing the capacity to recycle, transform and redirect this difficult energy into a positive force that works for you rather than against you
Find yourself thriving in situations and circumstances that would previously make you unhappy, fearful, inhibited and so on…Read on…

Going from clinging on to enjoying (Attachment to appreciation)

What are you deeply attached to in your life? Of these, what or who do you cling to in ways that are unhealthy, addictive, undermining to your self-esteem and create destructive patterns of behaviour? Think of one or two right now…

This article offers a few thoughts on how you can transform states of attachment and clinging onto appreciation and enjoyment. From an experiential point of view we have three types of object/person/situation that we encounter:

Those that we feel repulsed by or averse too
Those we feel drawn or attracted to, magnetised by
Those we feel neither attracted to or repulsed by, they are kind of neutral

Right now, we are focused on the second type of object, those we feel attracted to.

Underlying sources of attachment – Not enough, not competent, no joy
So what transforms something or someone that we feel attracted to to something that we feel attached or cling to? Part of it is an underlying sense within ourselves that we are incomplete, incompetent or that we have no joy or pleasure. For example:

If I feel incomplete as a man and I meet a woman I find attractive, then I may cling to her as a potential source of ‘completion’. So, what I feel for her is not just an appreciation of her attractiveness, but the idea that by possessing or obtaining her I will somehow ‘fix’ my problem of incompleteness or loneliness.
If I often feel incompetent or ineffective in life, then the things that I feel attracted to I may tend to cling to. For example if I feel incompetent in my business practice, I may cling onto a business or romantic partner as a ‘life raft’ saving me from my own confusion in the face of life’s complex challenges.
If I am out of touch with my feelings, both emotional and bodily, then I won’t feel much joy or pleasure in my life. As a result things that I could be enjoying and appreciating such as caffeine, alcohol, sex etc…become objects that I become addicted to, a way of replacing the fundamental absence of joy or pleasure’.

Coming to your objects of enjoyment from the POV of wholeness
If I want to experience objects of attraction in a healthy, pleasurable way then, I need to come to them from with a healthy self-sense, one where I experience myself fundamentally in three ways:

I am complete, loved, whole as I am
I am competent, adequate (to life’s challenges)
I have ready access to the feeling healthy joy and pleasure in my body, today

If you come to the things you currently feel attached to with these three attitudes, then you have the opportunity to transform them from objects of clinging to objects of appreciation and real enjoyment.

Moving from clinging on to appreciating
So then, if I come to people places and things I find attractive in our life with the idea that ‘I am complete, I am competent, and I feel joy’ then:

When I encounter an attractive member of the opposite sex it will be easy enough to appreciate them as they are, without needing to ‘possess’ them in order to validate myself.
When I face a difficult challenge in my business I won’t be cling to the idea of someone ‘saving me’, but if my business partner helps me out, then I can appreciate and enjoy that!
If I have access to joy and pleasure in my body, then I can enjoy sex, caffene, alcohol, endorphins etc…as a complement and enhancement of that, rather than an addiction that I use as a compensation.

Three ‘mindful injunctions’ from this:

Notice when you develop negative attachment or clinging in your life. Study the experience.
Practice coming to the things you feel attracted to from the perspective of ‘I am (already) enough, I am (already) competent, and I have access to joy’.
Emphasize appreciation and appropriate healthy enjoyment of the things you find attractive. Have fun and experience pleasure!

Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation Asia

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Saturday 26th May 10am-4.30pm – Mastering your Mind Through Mindfulness Meditation Day Retreat with Toby

Saturday, 9^th June, 9.30am-1pm – Meditations for Transforming Negativity and Stress into Energy, Positivity and Enlightenment

Saturday 16th June, 10-11.30am – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Saturday 23^rd June, 10am-4.30pm – An Introduction to Meditation from the Perspective of Shamanism

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Mental framing – Sculpting your view of life

Post author By Toby
Post date May 21, 2018

Dear Integral Meditators,

We are never in 100% charge of what we experience in life, but we can determine the way in which we experience what happens. This week’s article explores how to mindfully take advantage of this truth!

In the spirit of sculpting & framing,

Toby

Mental framing – Sculpting your view of life

We are never in 100% charge of what we experience in life, but we can always influence the way in which we experience what happens. How we influence the way in which we experience something is via the manner in which we pay attention to it, and in particular the way in which we mentally frame it. The essential question with mental framing is “What is the optimal way for me to view what I am experiencing, so that I derive maximum value and minimum unnecessary pain from it?”
This question and the answers we get from it are like mental sculpting. The raw materials are our life experiences, and our ways of mental framing are like the tools used to craft and mould the raw materials into the shape that I desire.
Last weekend I was giving the example to a class of my own workshop creation process. I’ve created over 50 meditation and mindfulness workshops in the last decade. Of these only around 50% have gone on to be successful in the sense of attracting a lot of people numbers. So, if I focus purely on the ‘success rate’, then I’m not going to be a very happy boy in some ways. However, there are many ways in which I can use my mind to frame what I am experiencing after a ‘failed’ workshop in ways that are helpful to me. For example:

‘It is realistic to expect many of the events that I put on to not attract large numbers. It’s simply part of my evolving work progress, and in fact a 50% success rate is very good in the circumstances!’ – This view helps me accept the experience, feel happy about it and sets me up to continue working with it in the long term without feeling discouraged.
‘A small number of people in a workshop creates an intimate space for me to have a more meaningful, small scale relationship to the participants’ – Again, this view helps me feel enthusiasm for the experience and helps me to keep my appetite for the work in the long term.
‘I learned a lot from creating the workshop, so it is feeding my own process of self-discovery and growth’ – This is absolutely and objectively true, I do learn a lot, and so the time was not wasted, indeed it was very well spent!
‘If it didn’t work in this context, maybe I can try it in another context’ – I’ve seen from my own experience how courses that I have created in one arena later became a part of my mainstream ‘successful’ courses later down the line. No creative process is ever entirely wasted! Indeed, some of my most successful material only finds the right audience two or three years down the line.
‘This is helping my ongoing learning process about value creation’ – Every time I try something out, or put it out to an audience, I learn more about value creation, in business, in relationships and in life. This learning in turn helps me to make the best of what I meet in each day, and to become more successful in life. What could be better than that?

So, there you go; five ways of mentally framing my situation in ways that help me to view and experience it in a positive AND REALISTIC way. Realistic is in caps because for mental framing to be effective it has to be reality focused. You can’t just fantasize any old BS that just isn’t true!
Mindfulness is all about releasing our potential for learning and growth in the moment. Mental framing is a technique that really we can be using all the time during our day to ‘sculpt’ our reality in a way that is useful and desirable. But to get going you might like to take one or two specific situations in life and practice framing them. Happy sculpting!

© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation Asia

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Tuesday 29, Wednesday 30th May – Wesak Meditation

Saturday 2^nd June, 9.30-11.30am – The Power of Presence – Mindfulness for managing conflict in your relationships and accessing your inner power

Saturday, 9^th June, 9.30am-1pm – Meditations for Transforming Negativity and Stress into Energy, Positivity and Enlightenment

Integral Meditation Asia

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The mindful way to becoming a Titan

Post author By Toby
Post date May 16, 2018

Dear Integral Meditators,

What are the real mindful keys to getting to where you want to go, and really achieving the things that you want in your life? My article below on ‘Becoming a mindful Titan’ offers a few perspectives!

In the spirit of great achievement,

Toby

Mindful Goals Coaching special offer:

Extended until Thursday 17^th May there is a special offer on Toby’s Mindful goals coaching service. Three x 60 minute packages are on a 15% special offer (a saving of $95). Contact info@tobyouvry.com for full details.

Are you looking for concrete ways that you can combine improving your mental peace and centeredness with moving forward toward your goals in life?
Do you sometimes find yourself struggling to bridge the gap between your life goals and your daily actions/experiences?
Would you like to have a personally created mindfulness training program designed specifically for your needs and to help you achieve what you want in life?

Read on…

The mindful way to becoming a Titan (incremental & undramatic)

The Titans were beings of immense elemental power who lived before the birth of the Gods. You can find them in the mythic stories of the Greeks, the Nordic and other cultural traditions. Nowadays we use the term ‘Titan’ to mean someone who stands large within his or her discipline, like a giant. Michael Jordan is a ‘Titan’ of basketball, Serena Williams is a ‘Titan’ of tennis, Meryl Streep has had a ‘titanic’ influence on female acting in Hollywood, and so on…
So how did these people become the Titans of their discipline? What we see on the outside is a lot of glitz, glamour and drama. Because of this it can be tempting to think that these are the cause of their ‘titanic presence’. But , if you look at the way in which these people build who they are, and the success they have, you’d actually see a tremendous amount of small, detailed, very repetitive and sometimes very boring actions that got them to the place they are. Serena Williams had to hit literally millions of tennis shots day in, day out to get where she is, whilst no one was looking or noticing. Similarly, an actor like Meryl Streep would have spent an inordinate and unnatural amount of daily attention to small detail, nuance and technique to get to where she did eventually.

The mindful way of progress – Incremental and undramatic
So, if we want to become Titans in our own lives, which is to say learn to fill our boots fully and stand tall and strong, fulfilling the potential that we have, then doing this means paying attention to a lot of small actions over a long period of time. The mindful way to fulfilling our potential is incremental, undramatic and generally very slow. For example:

If I say to myself ‘for the next three years, for five days a week, I am going to sit down for 10minutes and practice meditation. My aim is to become 15% more peaceful and centered’. If I then just relax and make sure I do that, then probably I’m going to be more than 15% more centered after three years. So, it’s just that small, by itself insignificant action done without drama that brings me the result.
I have been doing a short 20-30minute yoga program over the last two years, twice a week. In that time I have become imperceptibly more mobile and flexible, I don’t notice it from session to session, but I notice it if I compare myself now to myself six months ago. The difference is tangible.
A friend and I were talking last Sunday about how relationships (romantic and otherwise) are build or degrade over the course of hundreds and thousands of small inter-actions. Mindful attention to these exchanges gives rise to a titanically strong relationship. Equally inattention can destroy a strong relationship though incremental, consistent erosion.

Your self-development as a titanic project
So, whatever goals you have in your life, if you want to build your Titanic strength and get to where you want to go, then try the mindful, incremental and undramatic way. Set up a target 2-3 years from now. Decide on small actions you are going to do most or every day to get to where you want to go. Then focus on execution, without worrying about progress, or whether anyone else is noticing or not. Becoming an unstoppable elemental force is within everyone’s grasp, if you don’t mind the lack of drama.

© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation Asia

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Saturday 26th May 10am-4.30pm – Mastering your Mind Through Mindfulness Meditation Day Retreat with Toby

Tuesday 29, Wednesday 30th May – Wesak Meditation

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching * Meditation Technology

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Meditating with Your Inner Family

Post author By Toby
Post date April 23, 2018

Dear Integral Meditators,

What if as well as an outer family, you had an ‘inner family’ as well that you could draw upon for support as you go through the challenges of your life? The article below invites you to discover just such a family.

In the spirit of your inner family unit,

Meditating with Your Inner Family

Four seasons, four stages of life
The ‘inner family’ as I call it has been a contemplative tool that I started using when during a time when I studied the Wheel of the Year and the Western Wheel of Life in some detail. The essence of it is that, in the same way that a year has four seasons, spring, summer, autumn and winter, so we have four stages of life that correspond to these seasons. These stages are childhood, youth (or young adulthood), maturity (or middle age, the age of ‘responsibility’) and old age/death. The final stage, old age and death in turn leads to rebirth. The idea with your ‘inner family’ is that you have four personalities, or aspects of self inside you that correspond to each of these stages. Regardless of what physical stage of life you are in, each of these ‘four selves’ is available to draw upon as an energy resource, a perspective, a power and a wisdom.

The basic qualities of your inner family members
Your Child self has the qualities of innocence, playfulness, creativity, spontaneity, wonder. To have a functional inner child is to have access to all the above qualities in our life. The child self lacks planning ability and mature wisdom, so needs to be guided and looked after by the older members in order to remain healthy.
Your Youthful or Young Adult self corresponds to the age approximating 17-34. S/he is full of vital energy and life-force, is ambitious, looking to establish her identity in the world and make an impact upon it. S/he is the part of us that may be explicitly concerned with looks and sexuality, being attractive, and so forth. We can draw upon her to get things done, fire our enthusiasm, be determined, and regenerate our appetite for life.
Your Mature self is the part of you that corresponds to middle age. More mature and settled than the youthful self, the mature self is good at planning, being responsible, problem solving, looking after others, and bearing burdens. When we are in actual middle age, this part of ourself can feel pretty run down, and so needs the energy and support of the ‘younger selves’ as well as the wisdom and perspective of the old self!
Your Old or Wise self is that part of you that views life from the perspective of being close to deaths door. S/he has lived through all the previous stages, and the ups and downs that they have brought with them. Ideally this part of you is actively available to the three younger members for consultation and wisdom.

Tapping into the wisdom of your inner family
I often simply imagine myself in a place in nature, and then see the members of my inner family coming to meet me, and sitting around in a circle. Once we have ‘checked in’ with each other, we might then go on to tackle a particular problem together.
For example, I am about to move apartment for the fourth time in a year. My mature self (I’m literally 45 in physical age) is feeling a bit run down and tired by this, mentally and physically. As I sit with my inner family group, I let my mature self-receive the love and playful enthusiasm of my child self. My youthful self offers support and vital strength, as well as keeping my appetite for life and ambition burning away in a healthy manner. My old or wise self is on hand just to smile, empathizing at the suffering, and gently helping me pace myself through wisely. All in all having my inner family around makes the experience enjoyable; I don’t feel alone or isolated. It’s a perfect complement to my outer family!
You might like to find your own inner place in meditation where you can meet and get to know your inner family. You can then consult them at will about any situation or challenge you are going through, facing it together, like a team.

© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

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