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Strong back, soft front

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“By practicing a physically ‘strong back, soft front’ posture, we can get a feeling of what it is like to be inwardly strong and at the same time gentle on a psychological level.”

Dear Toby,

This weeks article looks considers how physical posture can invite psychological change, and how you can cultivate real inner strength.

In the spirit of  strength and gentleness,

Toby


Strong back, soft front

Traditional meditation posture involves sitting up straight, with an unsupported back. The head and neck are above the chest and shoulders, chest above the belly, belly sitting above the hips, like a stack of bricks. One reason for this is that meditation is about alertness as much as relaxation. If you lean against something, it may be relaxing, but the danger of your alertness dipping increases. So we can sit upright to cultivate this balance of relaxation and alertness upon which all effective meditation and mindfulness relies.

Soft front, strong back
As you are sitting up straight with a strong back, you can also deliberately soften the front of your body, the chest, belly and face. So you have a soft front, backed up by a strong backbone. This can be a physical posture that reminds us of how to be in life; we can present a gentle, restrained face to the world, because we know we are strong inside. Because we are inwardly strong, we are confident enough to be gentle outside (unless it is appropriate not to be so for a specific reason).

Armoring the front to hide a weak back
Often in life our position is the opposite of strong back, soft front. We feel afraid and insecure on the inside (weak back), and so to compensate we present a strong, armored, even aggressive front to the world to compensate. This affects our sense of who we are, and how other people experience us. By practicing the ‘strong back, soft front’ posture, we can get a bodily feeling of what it is like to be inwardly strong and at the same time gentle on a psychological level.

Practicum
Spend a little time each day sitting with a strong back and soft front. Let your body learn to recognize what this feels like. As you go about your daily activities, experiment with what it is like to feel strong inside and so gentle on the outside. Try talking and acting from this place in your relationships and in the way that you interact with the world. Notice how this changes how you participate in your life, and the opportunities for creative change it opens for you.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Tuesday and Wednesday 17,18 December – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation


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Allowing & Participating – Rethinking ‘being in control’

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“By mindfully combining allowing and participating we can control things better, without feeling the need to be so ‘in control”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article offers a couple of practical thoughts on how to re-frame our idea of being in control in a way that means less stress and more effectiveness. This weeks Wednesday meditation class will be focusing on how to work with these ideas!

In the spirit of participation,

Toby


Allowing & Participating – Rethinking ‘being in control’

I’ve recently been experiencing a time in my life where there are so many factors undergoing change that inevitably anxiety keeps coming up. When change occurs, especially deep and radical change, the part of us that wants to feel ´in control’ inevitably feels stressed because the situation feels ´out of control’.
I did a session with a client about the same topic. She was fighting with a similar feeling of trying to be ‘in control’ whilst feeling so many factors ‘out of control’. One of the ways in which we reframed our situation was to use the polarity of ‘accepting and participating’ rather than ‘in control or out of control’.
In control and out of control is a win-lose game; to control is to win, to be out of control is to loose. With allowing and participating:

  • We allow things to be uncertain, unfixed, to an extent beyond our control. By accepting we relax more comfortably into the situation we find ourself without unnecessary struggle
  • By participating, we look for ways to dance with and influence the situation in creative and constructive ways. Without trying to fix everything at once, we enjoy engaging and participating with our life each day through action that is as intelligent and playful as we are able.

When we practice allowing and participating, we can create a win-win experience: We can relax with things we can’t totally control, while staying active and engaged.
By mindfully combining allowing and participating we can control things better, without feeling the need to be so ‘in control’.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Tues  10th & Weds 11th December – Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 14th & 15th December, 2-5.30pm – The Mindful Heart Meditation Workshop

Tuesday and Wednesday 17,18 December – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Breathing Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Stress Transformation

Sinking your centre of gravity

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“If you observe your body during the day, you may notice is that, if there are a number of things that trigger your stress levels in succession, then your centre of gravity rises higher. If you consciously lower your centre of gravity, this can help build greater resilience to that stress.”
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Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores somatic awareness and how it can help you deal better with stress.  Enjoy!

In the spirit of  balance,

Toby

 

 

 

 


Bringing your centre of gravity down

If you observe your body during the day, you may notice is that, if there are a number of things that trigger your stress levels in succession, then your centre of gravity rises higher.
For example, if during breakfast you are reminded of a project at work that is stuck, that thought causes your centre to rise a bit from your lower belly up into your stomach.
Then your partner reminds you that you haven’t started to organise for the party on the weekend, so your centre rises up into your chest. This is accompanied by shallower breathing, from the mid and upper lungs, you are no longer using the lower lung.
Then you go to work and 3-4 people are trying to get your attention. You can’t settle into a task, and even more stress is triggered. By now your stress levels are forcing your energy into your upper chest and shoulders. Your shoulders rise towards your ears, you are breathing from the top of your lungs, and your getting brain cramp behind your eyes as you try and ‘think’ your way out of all the uncomfortable feelings you are having!

Sinking your centre of gravity
One simple way to reduce your stress level then is to simply notice when your centre of gravity rises in your body, and spend a few moments bringing it down. here is one simple method that you can use:

  • Notice the height of your centre of gravity in your torso. For example, it may be in your upper chest or clavicles. Place your hand/palm on that level, and breathe, being aware of it.
  • Then place your hand mid-way between your current centre of gravity, and your lower belly area. As you breathe the next few breaths, ‘sink’ your centre of gravity down to this level, taking slightly deeper breaths than usual.
  •  Now place your hand over your lower belly area, just beneath the belly button. Over the next few breaths sink your centre of gravity down from your mid-level down into the belly. This makes your centre of gravity low, with your upper body relaxed. Feel your torso becoming ‘broad’ at the base (hips and belly) and ’narrow’ at the top (head and shoulders), like a mountain or pyramid.

Keeping your centre of gravity low in your body like this helps to release stress as it arises, and decompress stress that has been building up over time. Try doing the exercise three times a day, for just a minute each time, and observe the effect that it has on you.

 

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday November 16th, 11.30am-1pm – Get your meditation pratice started now – The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Saturday November 23rd, 10am-1pm – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing

Re-Starts Monday November 4th, 6-7.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Tues  10th & Weds 11th December –  Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

 


Integral Meditation Asia

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creative imagery Integral Meditation Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindfulness

Key Practices for building mindful resilience (Video and article)

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“Mindful resilience is the capacity to remain actively aware, creatively productive, constantly learning, happy and effective in life and at work, even when faced with pressure, stress, and tension from both within our mind and from our external environment.”
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Dear Integral MeditatorsThis weeks article is one that I’ve published in conjunction with The Core Colective, it looks at areas of mindfulness that relate specifically to developing resilience.

Wishing you strength of body, mind and heart,

Toby

 

 

 

 

 


Faced with pressure, stress and tension? Try these ky practices to develop mindful resilience

Mindful resilience is the capacity to remain actively aware, creatively productive, constantly learning, happy and effective in life and at work, even when faced with pressure, stress, and tension from both within our mind and from our external environment.

If you’ve gone on meditation and mindfulness retreats yourself, you’ll know the wonderful feeling of being inspired to take the mindfulness back to the real world. Fast forward to the moment you touch down at home, back to your usual routine, and you find the state of mind you attained on your retreat, hijacked from you.

Sustaining mindfulness isn’t challenging for you alone. This chalenge inspired Toby to come up with a well-rounded and resilient mindfulness training to enable people to develop mindful resilience as a way of life through mindfulness and meditation practices.

Below is a list of what Toby believes, from practical experiences, are key practices to developing mindful resilience: Read full article

Alternatively you can watch Toby’s 45 seconds to greater inner resilience:

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday November 16th, 11.30am-1pm – Get your meditation pratice started now – The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Saturday November 23rd, 10am-1pm – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing

Starts Sunday November 3rd – A six week mindfulness course for adults with ADHD

Re-Starts Monday November 4th, 6-7.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Wednesday 6th November – Toby is a speaker at Naked Nights Presents: Religion In Our Modern World – The balance of tradition and modernity


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Mindfully working with your physical heart

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“The principle healing agent with mindfulness is always conscious awareness itself. But there are other emotional and mental healing agents that naturally start to flow in as a result of the primary act of conscious attention.”
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Dear Integral Meditators,This weeks article focuses on the physical heart as your object of mindful attention. Enjoy!

In the spirit of heart,

Toby


Meditating with your physical heart

Mindfulness and meditation have a capacity to help the health of your physical heart, and other parts of your body. These are complementary to other strategies that we have around diet, exercise, medication and so forth. The principle healing agent with mindfulness is always conscious awareness itself. But there are other emotional and mental healing agents that naturally start to flow in as a result of the primary act of conscious attention. With this in mind here are some simple ways to get started. They can be practiced together as a sequence, or individually, as you prefer:

  1. Becoming aware of the physical heat and heartbeat: Here you simply focus your attention in the area of the chest where your physical heart is located, and sense onto it, seeing what you notice. After a while you will have a sense of your heart as an object on your chest, and you will feel the heart-beat. You can also place your hand over the chest over your heart, and use that to sense the heart-beat. Just commune with your heart gently through mindful attention.
  2. Breathing with the flow of blood: With this practice, focus on your heart and heartbeat. Sense the network of arteries and veins thru-out your body. Sense the flow of blood thru your entire body. As you breathe out, be aware of the blood flowing out into your body through your arteries. As you breathe in be aware of the blood flowing back to your heart through the veins. Relax into this process for as long as you wish.
  3. Working with the emotional qualities of the physical heart: As you focus on your physical heart, be aware of any emotions present within the heart. As you breathe in soften and open your heart, allowing yourself to feel them, as you breathe out relax into the emotions present, letting them be released or enjoyed, as feels appropriate to you.
  4. Working with ‘heart qualities’: as a variation on exercise 3, you can select particular ‘heart qualities’ that you want to bring into your heart, for example care, courage, love or compassion. As you breathe in feel the energy of the emotional quality gathering and building in your physical heart, as you breathe out feel it spreading out from your heart into the rest of your body. Build a strong sense of the presence of that emotion in your heart, and feel it gently pumping and flowing our into the rest of your body. Feel a strong connection between your physical body and the energy of this emotion.

When you do these, perhaps it will be the first time that you have ever spent so much time paying attention directly to your physical heart. It can be a very powerful experience, and the beginning of a long, healthy and fulfilling collaboration between you and your physical heart!

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, June 15th, 29th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Starts Sunday November 3rd – A six week mindfulness course for adults with ADHD

Re-Starts Monday November 4th, 6-7.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Ten essential mindfulness practices

Dear Integral Meditators,

Mindfulness is, in essence the art of attention training. Looked at this way there are many, many ways of paying attention, and so there are a huge variety of mindfulness practices. The list below lists ten ‘mindful domains’, each of which play an important part in a truly integral mindfulness practice.

If you enjoy the article, then do have a look at the new Integral Mindfulness Program, which explores many of these practices in depth!

In the spirit of mindful wellbeing,

Toby


The Integral Mindfulness Program for Coaches, Counselors and Therapists – Creating sustainable high performance and deep wellnessOverview: This is a six-session dynamic mindfulness program designed for:

  • Those looking for an engaged, practical mindfulness course designed to build resilience, effectiveness and wellness in the face of work and life challenges
  • Trainers, coaches and therapists looking to integrate mindfulness into their own professional practice with clients
  • People who have been through basic conventional mindfulness training programs and are looking for the next level of practice and performance

Early bird offer: Get 20% off if you sign up before end Monday August 19th. Click here for full details


Ten essential mindfulness meditation practices

Mindfulness is, in essence the art of attention training. Looked at this way there are many, many ways of paying attention, and so there are a huge variety of mindfulness practices. The list below lists ten ‘mindful domains’, each of which play an important part in a truly integral mindfulness practice

  1. Grounding your attention in your body, sense and breathing awareness – The quickest route to basic psychological sanity and stability is through the senses. We should be aiming to develop ‘mountain like stability’ on our body and senses, which enables us to feel centred and stable even in the biggest life storms.
  2. Practicing the non-emergency nature of the present moment – Most situations in our life are not an emergency, yet we spend much of our life in minor (or major) crisis-mode. Recognising present safety and relaxing properly enables us to enjoy our life, and when it does arise to engage risk and danger wisely and intelligently.

With practice 1& 2 solid, we can then commit to increasing your range of functional states and perspectives through:

  1. Cultivating effective focus and concentration – Specifically with integral mindfulness we look to develop high quality ‘mindful flow states’, both in and out of meditation. These flow states are a combination of relaxation and focus, and act as the basis for sustainable, effective concentration
  2. Witnessing, observing, listening, being present – We should be continually stepping back and improving our capacity to observe what is going on within our field of awareness as an observer; being present, witnessing and nothing more.
  3. Committing to be aware – Number five is simply an ongoing commitment to turn and face ourselves, and notice what is going on within. It means consistently turning the light of our awareness inside with curiosity, courage, care
  4. Developing your emotional intelligence – Specifically: Being comfortable feeling emotions ( (both positive and negative), cultivating engaged detachment (the capacity to feel emotions fully and engage with them deeply without being consumed or victimised by them). Cultivating acceptance, appreciation, joy and benevolence/caring as our baseline emotional states. Getting to know the emotions we currently label as ‘negative’ well enough to find and leverage upon their value.
  5. Cognitive intelligence – The skills of thinking less in terms of quantity, thinking better in terms of quality. Also combining ‘positive thinking’ and attention to the good with critical thinking and effective risk assessment.
  6. Intentionality and responsibility – Living our life deliberately and ‘on purpose’. Expanding the depth and range of our intention and motivations for our actions. Setting intention before our actions, so that our actions are aligned with our highest intentions.
  7. Developing your capacity for creative awareness that accesses the non-linear, unconscious, intuitive and imaginative aspects of our potential.
  8. Having an enlightenment practice – A commitment to ongoing insight into the formless, timeless causal dimension of existence. Learning to rest our attention in it and gradually focus our fundamental sense of identity there.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, June 15th, 29th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturday 10th August, 2-5.30pm – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing

FOR BEGINNERS: Saturday 24th August, 11-12.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

 


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness One Minute Mindfulness

Mindful of: Your tone of voice 

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Dear Integral Meditators,

So much of our life is spent communicating, it’s definitely worthwhile investing out time, attention and intelligence to ´craft’ your messages and their tones wisely and benevolently. This weeks article explores some practical ways of doing this!

Final reminder of this Saturdays  Practical introduction to Qi gong workshop, 9.30am-1pm, Tuesday meditation classes re-start next week 😉

In the spirit of tone,

Toby


Mindful of: Your tone of voice 

I have recently come to the end of a three week holiday where we have been travelling in France, Spain and England. As you probably know, holidays can be fun and relaxing, but they can also be quite stressful, as the different personalities of all those traveling run up against each other!
One of the ways that I have focused on mindfulness practice as I have been traveling is to be aware of the tone of my voice as I communicate. I have found this to be a super useful way of managing my own moods, and saying what I want to say in a way that is helpful to my fellow travellers.
Speaking is not just what you say, it’s the way that you say it. Even with very basic words such as ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ here are a huge variety of tones with which you say it that completely change the message and mood.
So, as a mindfulness practice tone of voice can be thought of as consisting of two questions:

  1. ‘What do I want to say?’
  2. ´What is the best way to say what I want to say?’

The first question is about the basic message. The second is about the delivery; what is the tone of voice and way of wording your message that will maximise the chance of it being effective, and giving the best result for everyone concerned? If you spend a few moments before you speak on these two questions, then it’s surprising the changes that you can make for the better.
So much of our life is spent communicating, it’s definitely worthwhile investing out time, attention and intelligence to ´craft’ your messages and their tones wisely and benevolently.

Here are two other areas to pay attention to around tone:
Your tone tells you your mood– Quite often we are not fully aware of our mood or emotional state until we say something, and our tone tells us a lot about what we are feeling. So simply listening to your tone of voice can be a very interesting and useful thing to pay attention to.
Increase your range of positive tones -Get to know what a range of positive tones sound like and practice them. For example, an assertive tone (as opposed to aggressive), loving/caring, light (as opposed to heavy), serious, inquisitive, sincere, calm, or joyful. Try and develop the range of tones that you have available to use consciously.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm (Restarts 21st August) – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings (Restarts 13th August), 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, June 15th, 29th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturday 10th August, 2-5.30pm – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels and for Self-Healing

FOR BEGINNERS: Saturday 24th August, 11-12.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

 


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Integral Awareness Meditation techniques Mindfulness Presence and being present

Mindful with your handphone – Four ways

If you can be mindful with your handphone, then for most people that means a lot of time each day being mindful!

Dear Integral Meditators,

If you can be mindful with your handphone, then for most people that means a lot of time each day being mindful! The article below explores how…

In the spirit of being mindful with your mobile,

Toby


I was talking with a colleague this morning about how difficult it is to manage stress with a handphone. Messages coming in, social media, games, it can be so difficult not to get stressed when your always reaching for your phone at the first sign of anxiety or boredom. With this in mind here are four simple ways to use your handphone to become more mindful:

  1. Notice it as a physical object – Rather than opening the screen, use your phone to come to your senses by noticing its colour, its weight and feel in your hand, it’s texture and the little scratches. Decompress your mental stress by coming to your senses.
  2. Message 15% slower – Normally we text fast, making mistakes as we go along, and holding a lot of unnecessary tension in our face and body. Relax your body and face, and type a little slower. If you do this then texting will become more relaxing. You’ll probably get just as many done as there will be fewer typos, and the content you write will be better!
  3. Use it to measure your anxiety – if you notice yourself reaching for your phone impulsively and often, it’s likely due to underlying anxiety or stress. Notice when this is happening and, instead of going on screen, spend a few breaths just looking after your anxiety and extending care and awareness to yourself.
  4. Ask yourself “What good can I do with my phone?” – Use your phone on purpose; text to bring happiness to others, to develop a skill (egg: learn a language), educate yourself, to journal on the way back from work. There are many meaningful and fulfilling ways you can use your phone to create a better life for yourself and others, it begins by asking yourself this question. Go for it!

Enjoy being mindful with your phone!

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2019.


Upcoming classes and workshops

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Awareness and insight Concentration Life-fullness mind body connection Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness One Minute Mindfulness Presence and being present

Mindful of your intensity level

E
“By being mindful of our intensity level we can avoid burning out thought long term over-exertion, and also avoid unnecessary under-productivity. It’s an easy way to avoid extremes and hit your ‘sweet spot’ in terms of both quality of life and productivity!”

Dear Integral Meditators,

What is your habitual ‘speed and intensity level’? This weeks article explores how you can start to set the pace that serves you in your life!

In the spirit of balanced intensity,

Toby

 


Mindful of your intensity level

Think about your pace and intensity in life as having four speeds:

  1. 1-2 – Sleep or complete relaxation
  2. 3-4 – Low effort mode, doing just enough
  3. 5-6 – Flow state, a balance of focused effort and relaxation
  4. 7-10 – High intensity effort

Take a moment to reflect on which ‘speeds’ you tend to be in for much of your day. As you do so you might start to recognise that you tend to favour one or two speeds, and not the other two. Ideally as mindfulness practitioners, we should be looking to have each of these levels of intensity available to us, and use them consciously according to our need.
So, for example much of the productive part of our day would be at the ‘flow-state’ level of 5-6 on the scale; a balance of focused relaxation. This level enables us to get work done at a pace that is sustainable over a period of time, without getting exhausted or burned out.
Occasionally we might peak up to a high intensity 7-10 when we really want to get something done in a faster way (eg: in an emergency), but then after we would need to consciously dip back down to level 2 (3-4 intensity) for a while in order to restore our energy level. Of course we would be going down to level 1 by getting enough sleep and absolute rest.
The point about this four level structure of intensity is that, if we have it in mind we can then start to mindfully manage our effort and energy during the day. We avoid burning out thought long term over-exertion, and also avoid unnecessary under-productivity. It’s an easy way to avoid extremes and hit your ‘sweet spot’ in terms of both quality of life and productivity!
A useful question to ask ourselves is ‘How much effort and intensity do I need to compete this task?’ Quite often I find that its slightly less than I think. If I relax a little and bring just enough intensity to the task, that brings me to the optimal level of effort.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com   


All Courses at Integral Meditation Asia 

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, June 1st, 15th, 29th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

FOR BEGINNERS: Saturday 15th June, 11-12.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Tuesday/Wednesday 18th&19th June – Summer Solstice balancing and renewing meditation

Saturday 22nd June, 2-5pm – Going From Over-whelmed to Over-well: Meditation for Quietening the Mind – a three hour workshop


Integral Meditation Asia

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Compassionate listening

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‘Stilling the mind opens a space for us to listen to our inner wisdom, which is always there, but often hidden by the noise’

Dear Toby,

This weeks article is on how to mindfully listen a bit better, to ourselves and others.

In the spirit of  listening,

Toby


Compassionate listening 

There is an old definition of meditation that is quite useful to consider:

Prayer is talking to God, meditation is listening to God”.

If our mind is talking to itself all the time, how are we going to be able to listen to the intuitive wisdom, or the “still small voice” of our inner self as it offers us advice and support and in our life’s journey? Listening in a reflective, meditative manner is important for this reason. It is also important as a practise for helping us to develop our compassionate heart with other people. If, when we are with others, we consciously quieten our mind and really attend to what they are saying, often they will notice and appreciate what we are doing for them.
There is a book by Michael Ende called “Momo” that is about this power of listening. Momo is a little girl who is able to heal all those who come to her simply by deeply and attentively listening to the stories that they tell her about their life.
The second aspect of really listening to people is that we see more clearly where they are coming from, and so be much more likely to act in ways that are appropriate and helpful to both them and us. So, when you are with others, try and see your listening to them as a meditation, it will help both them and you!
I want to end this article by outlining three ways NOT to listen that I had drummed into me during my Tibetan Buddhist training, using the anlalogy of a pot:

Don’t be like an upturned pot
An upturned pot cannot receive any liquid into itself. Similarly, if we are not really listening (to ourself or others), we are like an upturned pot; nothing is going in!
Don’t be like a leaky pot
A pot with a leak cannot not hold what it liquid, it is useless. If we are not really paying attention, even if we hear what is being said, it simply “goes in one ear and out of the other” so to speak!
Don’t be like a bad smelling pot
You pour fresh juice into a dirty and bad smelling pot the fresh liquid becomes contaminated instantly. Similarly, if we are listening to someone, and there is a continuous negative inner commentary going on in our mind, this poisons everything that we are hearing. As George Michael once said (was it the title of one of his albums?) “Listen without prejudice”

Article © Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com   


All Courses at Integral Meditation Asia 

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Wednesday 12.30-1.30 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, June 1st, 15th, 29th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

FOR BEGINNERS: Saturday 15th June, 11-12.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Tuesday/Wednesday 18th&19th June – Summer Solstice balancing and renewing meditation

Saturday 22nd June, 2-5pm – Going From Over-whelmed to Over-well: Meditation for Quietening the Mind – a three hour workshop


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology