Category: Presence and being present

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Combining psychic & psychological self-defence  

“A strong self-concept makes you naturally able to defend yourself energetically, even if your awareness of subtle energy itself is not that pronounced or developed”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at how you can begin to distinguish the disciplines of psychological and psychic self-defence and combine them using a simple but profound practice.

Heads up for the new Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind – Masterclass & Mini-retreat on Saturday 17th April, and the Meditation for beginners workshop on the 10th April.

And finally, next weeks Full moon manifestation meditation on Tuesday and Wednesday.

In the spirit of subtle strength,

Toby

 

Combining psychic & psychological self-defence  

Psychic and psychological self-defence is essentially the art of learning to defend yourself from a subtle energetic attack, either from within yourself or from outside. ‘Subtle energetic’ means it is not a physical attack, but an attack on the level of mind, emotions, and energy. In this article I want to speak about the differences between the psychic and psychological dimension, and then explain a simple exercise that combines the two.

Psychological self-defence
Is based around a healthy self-concept and image, plus clear boundary between self and other (separation and individuation). If you have basically healthy self-esteem, you trust yourself and are reasonably confident, then this will help your energetic resilience in the face of criticism, judgment, aggression or psychological manipulation by others. If you have clear relationship boundaries, are self-responsible and know your own inner wounds and weaknesses, then this further shores up your subtle energetic strength. A strong self-concept like this makes you naturally able to defend yourself energetically, even if your awareness of subtle energy itself is not that pronounced or developed.

Psychic self-defence
Is based around awareness of and ability to work with subtle energy and energy exchange. It implies the development of your inner senses and capacity to sense, see and perceive a subtle energy attack and defend yourself against it. It also involves the art of building your subtle energetic strength through different forms of meditation and mindfulness activity. In my experience you can make a big difference to your energetic strength in this way, but it will only go so far if you don’t back it up with work on your self-concept (ie: your psychological strength)

Standing in your own power (An exercise that mixes both psychic and psychological dimension of self-defence)
Imagine there is a flame, or ball of light (like a miniature sun) in your heart.  The substance of the ball or flame is made up of the subtle energy of your life-force, but it also symbolizes your own healthy psychological self-concept; your self-esteem, confidence and resilience. Imagine the flame/ball radiating energy around your body, creating a ball of light or energy bubble around you. This bubble of light is semi-permeable, meaning it lets in positive energy, but you cam block any negative energy attempting to come through. As you sit or stand, feel your body posture adjusting subtly to reflect and express your psychological well-being and heath. You are protected from negative energy around you and within the bubble your body, mind and heart are filled with the energy of psychological heath and strength.

So of course you can’t just completely change your psychological self-image with a visualization like this. But it will strengthen the existing psychological strength that you have, and start to combine it with the inner energetic awareness involved in psychic self-defence. This is a simple and effective begin combining your own practice of psychological and psychic self-defence.

Related article: Six aspects of good psychic self-defence

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Saturday 10th April, 3-4.30pm – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now (Live & Online) – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Once sentence summary: Learn the practical fundamentals of how to meditate and begin your own meditation practice in this short 90minute workshop
You may have heard how meditation can increase:

  • Your quality of life
  • Your sense of inner security and well-being
  • Your ability to love and be loved
  • Your concentration
  • Your ability to access inner peace

Read about the workshop

Tues 30th & Weds 31st March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation SessionThis meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalizes on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

  • Bring energy and health to our physical body
  • Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
  • Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
  • Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goals

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 30th & Weds 31st March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 10th April, 3-4.30pm – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now (Live & Online) – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Saturday 17th April 11.30am-1.30pm & 2.15-5.15pm – Mindfulness meditation for mastering & stilling the mind – Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

Representing your values – Mindful self-trust 

“The more we are able to access the innate feeling of trusting ourself, the more relaxed and confident we will then tend to feel about our ability to represent our values consistently and capably; we feel we are in integrity with ourself.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at self-trust as a quality we can develop through mindfulness. If you enjoy it, we will be meditating on it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class this week.

Beneath the main article you can also find another one on overcoming passivity, in case you missed it!
In the spirit of self-trust,

Toby

 

 

Representing your values – Mindful self-trust

One fundamental way to build your own self-esteem and trust is to act with integrity, which is to say in accordance with your own values. If you are consistently speaking acting and being in a way that you are representing yourself appropriately, then you are going to feel secure within yourself, and that you are in the presence of someone trustworthy.
Here is a simple three stage cycle that you can use to build trust in yourself and your integrity.

Intention – “How can I act with integrity in this situation, what are my values here?” Firstly, in any given situation you need to turn up with the intention to represent your own values.
Consistency and reliability – “Am I consistently following through with my values?” Secondly, you need to be consistent about it. It’s not enough to begin with the intention, but then forget it half way and end up acting in a way that doesn’t represent our values at all.
Capability – “What are the skills I need to represent myself with integrity here?” Thirdly, you need to assess your capability to act in accordance with your values. Sometimes it is not that you don’t want to, or that you aren’t consistently trying, it is just that you lack the skill and capability to act in such a way. In this case you need to learn the appropriate skill to become capable.

Doing what you say you will do
So of course, there are a huge number of ways that these three stages can play out according to circumstance, but on a simple level it’s about doing what you say (to yourself) you will do, and demonstrating to yourself on a daily basis that you are trustworthy and can be relied upon.

  • If you say to yourself you are going to do some research into starting a new business tomorrow, then tomorrow do the research
  • If you say to yourself that you are going to talk to your partner about the difficult subject you have both been avoiding, then make sure you do so!
  • If you are being bullied at work and say your going to learn how to handle it better, then go and find someone who can teach you or coach you. If you don’t have the capability, then learn it

The state of self-trust
The state we are aiming for here is one that, when we are in our own company, we feel as if we are with someone whom we feel comfortable trusting

  • We trust the power of our conscious intention
  • We feel we can rely on ourself and our consistency
  • We may not have all the skills to deal with all scenarios, but we can trust ourselves to be pro-active, and acquire the skills we lack (when we do lack them) to become capable and effective

The feeling of trust invites integrity
The more we are able to access the innate feeling of trusting ourself, the more relaxed and confident we will then tend to feel about our ability to represent ourself and our values consistently and capably; we feel we are in integrity with ourself. It becomes a mutually enhancing circle of integrity and trust that we can use to feel energised and enthusiastic about our life, even and particularly when we are under pressure or navigating uncertainty.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed this article: Overcoming passivity (Centered, responsive, creative)

Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us. As a result, it is easier for us to turn toward our challenges, to face them directly, and respond consciously, creatively and dynamically to them. This in turn increases our sense of positive participation in and enjoyment of life. It becomes a playground for us to learn, develop and get stuck into, rather than a frightening, intimidating trap waiting to get us!
Read full article

Watch Toby’s 45 Second mindfulness video  – Overcoming passivity:

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

 

 

 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Energy Meditation Enlightened Flow Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation Recordings mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present Uncategorized

Overcoming passivity

 

“Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us.”

Dear Toby,
Mindfulness, well practiced should make us calmer, but not more passive. In the article below I explore a bit of the process whereby we can become more dynamically engaged in our life by being more mindful.
Quick practical note, the timings for the Psychic Self-Defence Masterclass and Mini-retreat have now been adjusted to be both on Saturday 27th March, from 10.30-12.30, and then 1.15-4.15.

In the spirit of pro-activity,

Toby

 

 

Overcoming passivity (Centered, responsive, creative)

Uncentered, anxious, passive
When we feel off balance mentally and emotionally, we naturally become more vulnerable to anxiety. When we are anxious, the tendency to avoid problems, challenges and stress instinctively causes us to avoid thinking about them, or to think fearfully. When we do this we become passive, non-creative and procrastinate. We then only act when we have to, as a reaction at the last minute, that we may not have thought through.

Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us. As a result, it is easier for us to turn toward our challenges, to face them directly, and respond consciously, creatively and dynamically to them. This in turn increases our sense of positive participation in and enjoyment of life. It becomes a playground for us to learn, develop and get stuck into, rather than a frightening, intimidating trap waiting to get us!

Centering yourself 
One simple way to mindfully center yourself is as follows:

  • Sitting of standing comfortably, locate the approximate center of your torso, somewhere between the heart and the solar plexus, mid-way between the front and back, left and right halves of the body. Don’t worry to much about exactness, just find the approximate literal physical center of your body.
  • As you breathe in, breathe your body energy into your center, feel your life-force and energy gathering there. As you breathe out, relax from this central point, feeling your life-force flowing from the centre of your body to the periphery.
  • Take a few breaths like this to physically, psychologically and energetically center. Relax into the solidity of this feeling

Turning and facing 
From this position of centre, being to mind a challenge that you are facing, one that might normally cause you to move into a state of avoidance, anxiety and passivity. Turn and face this issue, being mindful to stay centered, even as different emotions come up. Be curious, caring and courageous, what do you notice as you then amd face?

Responding pro-actively
Think to yourself ‘How can I engage in this challenge benevolently, creatively and pro-actively? What can I try? What can I offer?’
Your answers to these questions is your invitation to overcome your passivity, and get stuck in!

Watch Toby’s 45 Second mindfulness video  – Overcoming passivity:

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed this article: Mindful Optimism

Finding optimism 
What is the state of optimism like? Here are a few characteristics that occur to me:

  • Joyful-ness, enthusiasm
  • A sense of being supported by tangible and intangible forces in the world
  • The feeling of a bright and possibly exciting future ahead
  • The reasonable expectation good things are going to happen to you, both now and in the future
  • An expansive, bright and comfortable feeling in the body, as if you belong in the world, and you can operate there with ease
  • Read full article  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreatIn a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Mindful Optimism

“We don’t need to wait for optimism to come to us, we can cultivate it and learn to generate it deliberately in and out of meditation. By doing so it can become a state that is instinctive and intuitive for us, rather than happening only occasionally and circumstantially.”

 

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article is an exploration of the state of optimism. If you enjoy it, we will be meditating on it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class.

Quick practical note, the timings for the Psychic Self-Defence Masterclass and Mini-retreat have now been adjusted to be both on Saturday 27th March.

In the spirit of optimism,

Toby

 

Mindful Optimism

Finding optimism 
What is the state of optimism like? Here are a few characteristics that occur to me:

  • Joyful-ness, enthusiasm
  • A sense of being supported by tangible and intangible forces in the world
  • The feeling of a bright and possibly exciting future ahead
  • The reasonable expectation good things are going to happen to you, both now and in the future
  • An expansive, bright and comfortable feeling in the body, as if you belong in the world, and you can operate there with ease

If you think about times when you have felt optimistic in the past, you may start to notice that it is a bit like my description above. What other qualities characterize your own experience of optimism?
We don’t need to wait for optimism to come to us, we can cultivate it and learn to generate it deliberately in and out of meditation. By doing so it can become a state that is instinctive and intuitive for us, rather than happening only occasionally and circumstantially.

The Brightness of your life-force
To me optimism is very related to an overall sense of life-fullness. The experience is feeling full of life, with your life-force strongly present in the body, radiating out from your center into your energy field and into the world. Being optimistic makes you creative and solar, rather than passive and resigned.

Why optimism is difficult and pessimism is often easier
It can be easier to be pessimistic than optimistic. Reasons for this include:

  • Our natural psychological bias toward negative thinking and threat detection
  • Cognitive overload and emotional exhaustion
  • Anxiety
  • Previous traumas and negative experiences
  • A sense of being helpless in the face of the overwhelming problems of the world that are beyond our control

Each one of these factors is worth acknowledging within ourselves in order to release and let go of. The space and we create by doing this we can then begin to fill with conscious optimism.

Optimism, reason and reasoning
As well as the feeling of optimism, it’s well worth looking for verifiable facts in our life that make optimism reasonable and realistic. For example if I look at the state of my (own and my family’s) health, friendships and business right now there is a legitimate, factual basis for optimism. It’s important to have facts to back up our optimism, because pessimism, depression and anxiety often come as an overwhelming feeling. They ‘feel’ real, even if they have no basis.

Embodying and acting from optimism
We can back up the feeling of optimism by deliberately speaking optimistically and acting in a way that is consistent with optimism. For example, if I am talking to a friend about a problem that I am having, I usually make a point about why the challenge could be a good thing for me and all concerned. This way of speaking about it frames it in a way that makes it feel and seem like there is plenty of room for optimism, even if some aspects of what is happening are unpleasant or difficult.

Balancing optimism with critical thinking
Optimism makes it easier to face up to problems and challenges because we feel less intimidated by them. It is then easier to see drawbacks, problems, uncertainties in a critical and objective way, that doesn’t threaten our sense of optimism, and is indeed complementary to it.

PS: Life-fullness, which I mention in Paragraph 2 is also the style of coaching that I offer, the unique characteristics of which you can read about and watch here.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 1.15-4.15pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

 

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

 

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 1.15-4.15pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Energy Meditation Enlightened love and loving Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

The state of connected

“The capacity to enjoy a benevolent intimate connection to ourself is a key energizing force. If we feel comfortable on our own skin, if we like who we are and spending time with ourself, if we can trust ourself to be on our own side, then we will feel confident and energised when alone”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article is an exploration of the state of connection. If you enjoy it, we will be exploring it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class.

In the spirit of connection,

Toby

 

 

 

The state of connected (A node in a web)

Instinctively as humans we feel strengthened and energized by a sense of community and connection. Here are four ways that you can mindfully cultivate a state of connection and the benefits that it brings.

  1. Independent interdependence – The first observation is that, on one level, the notion of independence and separation is an illusion. We are in a dependent relationship to others in a myriad of ways. The food we eat, the clothes we wear all come from the work of others. Nominally independent, the reality is that we live in a state of continuous interdependence on others. Just this recognition can help is to start to appreciate connection and relationship in a different way. We want to combine our sense of independence and interdependence into a complementary whole.
  2. Connected to yourself, comfortable in your own skin – We are in relationship to others, but for most of us the first disconnect happens with ourself. The capacity to enjoy a benevolent intimate connection to ourself is a key energizing force. If we feel comfortable on our own skin, if we like who we are and spending time with ourself, if we can trust ourself to be on our own side, then we will feel confident and energised when alone.
  3. Supported by others – When you aren’t feeling good about yourself, or if you are feeling tired, we can start to unconsciously self-isolate, and feel lonely, without support. Deliberately remembering and opening to the relationships we have with others whose basic intention toward us is supportive and benevolent is a simple and powerful way to calm and energize ourselves as we go through challenges.
  4. Environmental connection & participation – There is a three-way connection that you can be aware of here; the earth/planetary being beneath you, the sky, stars and universe above (and around in the big sense of the word) you, and the landscape and forces of nature immediately around you. When you are surrounded by an artificial and man-made environment, it is easy to forget and cease to leverage upon the natural communion and connection that we have with the planet, nature and the universe.

An image for connection – A node in a web
Imagine your energy field around you like a ball of light. Imagine it to be like a node or connecting point in a huge web of energetic connection above you, below you, around you. You can see the threads of this web extending from your energy field to other nodes; people and nature around you, the planet beneath you, the stars, sun and moon above. Imagine yourself being fed with positive energy by all of the threads connecting your energy field to these other sources. You can also feel yourself giving energy to those around you via these threads. You are giving and receiving in a way that is creating energy and wellbeing for both you and those you are connected with. You can focus on the feeling of being generally connected, or on your connection to particular people or sources. Relax with this image and with the feeling of being connected for as long as you want. Allow it to give you a sense of your own living state of connection, and the energy that it makes available to you.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 3-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 3-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Energy Meditation Enlightened Flow Integral Awareness Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Confidence Mindful Self-Leadership Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Opening to the abundance of possibility

“When we build a state of openness to possibility in meditation, we can make it part of our approach to daily life. Our world becomes a place of abundance and wealth. Our open-ness to possibility becomes a source of energy for us, feeding us as we move into the unknown.”

Dear Integral Meditators

Faced with the uncertainty of the future, how do you respond? The article below explores how you can go about energizing your relationship to the future by mindfully opening to possibilities!
Possibility is one of the meditation objects for a new course beginning on the 23/24th Feb Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course. It focuses on how you can use meditation to create increasing levels of energy in your life. Scroll down below for full details.

Wishing you all the very best for the upcoming lunar new year weekend, and the year of the Ox!

Toby

Opening to the abundance of possibility

The dance of possibility, anxiety and uncertainty
I didn’t know how things are going to turn out for me today exactly, or this week. Extend this to a month or a year, taking into account all the complexity of my life, sometimes it doesn’t feel I’m on control of much! The temptation can be to respond to this uncertainty with anxiety, and attempts to reduce the open-endedness of the situation. An alternative approach is to experience this uncertainty as a wealth of possibilities that I enter into everyday. These possibilities  are pregnant with potential, excitement and wonderment. Rather than trying to shut down and narrow, I can feel myself opening to the wealth of possible experiences.

Is your life a playful game or a mouse trap?
One important context for this is your sense of what life is. Is it like a mouse trap, luring you in and then snapping over your head, waiting to get you? Or is it a game that you can play with a lighter touch, with reasonable expectation that there will be at least as many good things that come your way as difficult ones? Not only this, but in this second type of game even the difficult and challenging things can be good things. They can be openings inviting the possibly of growth, re-invention and new and better things in the medium and long term.
The important thing here is that you can consciously choose to play the latter game, and that opens the door to a whole new world of possibility.

Possibility and self-esteem/self-acceptance
Another important factor in enjoying possibility is your self-concept. Do you view yourself as the sort of person to whom good things happen, and who can reasonably expect fulfillment and well-being in life? When presented with opportunities for fulfillment, are you able to accept them openly, believing you are deserving, or do you (often down unconsciously) reject this as something that is not appropriate for you, that you aren’t deserving or worthy of?
If you are going to enjoy the possibilities that life gives you, you have to be prepared to accept them, and take responsibility for making the most of them. Otherwise, no matter how many are presented to you, the danger is you continually let them pass you by.

The energy, excitement and anticipation of possibility
In meditation it is well worth finding and sitting with the feeling of opening to possibilities in the moment. This includes feeling calm and centred, but in combination with a sense of life’s abundance, of a degree of excitement and anticipation. It can also include opening to the fundamental sense of life being a mystery, and in that sense there being something deeper and larger than ourselves guiding us onto the next adventure.

Living in a world of abundant possibility
Once we have built this state of openness to possibility in meditation, we can then practice making it part and parcel of our approach to daily life. Our world becomes a place of abundance and wealth, and our open-ness to possibility becomes a source of energy for us, feeding us as we move into the unknown.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com   

Watch Toby’s short video on opening to possibility:

 

Saturday 6th & 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow Mini-retreat

Are you interested in learning a form of meditation that will:

  • Help you to get in touch with a deeper level of psychological harmony and wellbeing within yourself?
  • Access new levels of energy and confidence?
  • Discover and heal hidden aspects of your psyche that are currently sabotaging your happiness in daily life and transforming them into something useful and powerful within you?

Read full details

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Overview: What are states of mind, body and heart that, when we cultivate them open us to more energy, more self-empowerment and more enthusiasm, even when we are living in difficult conditions, like during Covid? This unique and new course by Toby introduces seven different ways of meditating, each of which is designed to create a loop of increasing positive energy inside us. The more we do them, the more empowered we feel. These are way to help you feel increasingly dynamic and joyful, as opposed to oppressed and a victim of circumstance.
The ‘mindful skillset’ you will develop can be applied equally to your professional or personal life.

Read full details

 

Saturday 27th February, 6-7pm – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

  • Bring energy and health to our physical body
  • Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
  • Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
  • Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goals

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Saturday 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow –  Mini-retreat

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th February, 6-7pm – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Inner vision Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditation techniques mind body connection Presence and being present

Re-learning to non-think

“When you were a young child there were regular, natural periods of time when your mind would have been in a state of non-thinking presence, states of natural thought-free wonderment and wondering”.

Dear Integral Meditators,

Right now you may have difficulty stopping thinking, but it wasn’t always that way. This weeks article offers practical techniques for re-owning your non-thinking state, and reasons why you should be interested in doing so.
Some of the sessions for February are out, including a meditation on the triple Goddess next week, Meditating on the language of your shadow self, and meditation on the Lunar new year of the Ox. Full details below!

In the spirit of wonder and wondering,

Toby

Re-learning to non-think

Non-thinking is a skill you should have learned at school
When you were a young child there were regular, natural periods of time when your mind would have been in a state of non-thinking presence, a state of ‘child like wonder’. When we started education we were taught to fill our mind with content and process information. As we did so, without realizing it, less and less of our time was spent in a non-thinking state, and more and more in ‘thinking’ mode. By the time we get to adulthood, it seems as if we are stuck in thinking mode all the time, mostly without choice.

Non-thinking means to develop the skill of emptying your mind of content
So then as adults we need to remember the capacity that we had to non-think, to empty our mind of content periodically, and rest in a state of non-thinking. Meditation and mindfulness can help is do this.

Ways to empty your mind of content
Here are a few simple meditation techniques that you can use to re-awaken your non-thinking capacity. I outline them briefly, with links to previous articles on each method:

  • Watch the spaces between your thoughts – rather than watching your thoughts, pay attention to the spaces in between your thoughts, and gently try and extend them for a moment or two longer each time one appears. Gradually get used to relaxing with the non-thinking state as you get better at extending these ‘gaps’.
  • Practice belly breathing –  Bringing your attention down to your belly,  relax and try to gently focus your attention and awareness in this part of your body, letting go of excess conceptual thoughts and mental activity in your head.
  • Practice brain relaxation – The basic premise for the meditation is that your brain is your “organ of thought” so to speak, and so by bringing your physical brain into a start of deep relaxation it can actually be relatively easy and natural to calm the mind and move into a state of spacious non-thought.

The benefits of practising non-thinking
We regenerate the energy of our body-mind – A non-thinking state stops you burning energy, and helps you recover on all levels.
We recover from cognitive overload – Emptying your mind helps you find relief from the very information-age problem of processing too much information and having too many choices to make
We rediscover the joy of thinking – By dropping thinking for a while we can return to thinking with enthusiasm, appetite and clarity. When thinking is voluntary rather than an obligation, it becomes a joy!
We discover the subtle dimensions of our inner world, body & mind – By suspending your linear thinking mind for periods, you start to become aware of the subtle and intuitive mental and perceptual processes that lie underneath. We discover a space of wonder and wondering within the amazing inner world that we all have available to us when we stop thinking too much.
We connect to the formless, timeless dimension of consciousness and the self – Beneath the content of our conscious lies the unitive experience of consciousness itself, a world where you, me and everyone else merges into a greater Self that unites us in a greater experience of love, wisdom and togetherness. This reason alone is more than enough to train yourself in the literally timeless art of non-thinking.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com

Tuesday 2nd & Wednesday 3rd Feb, 7.30-8.30pm – Bright, Mother and Weaver Goddess meditation

About the class: This meditation is done at the time of an ancient Celtic festival called “Imbolc”, or the festival of Saint Brigid, who is both a venerated saint and a Goddess figure embodying both fire and water. It marks the beginning of spring, celebrating the new life that is emerging from the earth, and the lambs and other babies that are being born in the animal kingdom. It will be a gentle meditation where we will be communing with the Goddess in three aspects…
Read full details

Saturday 6th & 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow – Masterclass and Mini-retreat

Are you interested in learning a form of meditation that will:

  • Help you to get in touch with a deeper level of psychological harmony and wellbeing within yourself?
  • Access new levels of energy and confidence?
  • Discover and heal hidden aspects of your psyche that are currently sabotaging your happiness in daily life and transforming them into something useful and powerful within you?

Read full details

Tuesday 9th & Wednesday 10th February – Lunar New Year Meditation 2020: Developing your stamina, willpower and self-confidence in the year of the Ox This is a meditation to welcome in the lunar new year energies, and attune to the astrological animal of the year, the Ox!
In particular, we will be mindfully aligning with and developing our inner-stamina, willpower and self-confidence, which are personal characteristics of the Ox.
Toby will be leading the meditation as a simple and profound way, with plenty of room for our own personal contemplation, inner healing and positivity building!
Read full details
Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

 

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 2nd & Wednesday 3rd Feb, 7.30-8.30pm – Bright, Mother and Weaver Goddess meditation

Saturday 6th & 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow – Masterclass and Mini-retreat

Tuesday 9th & Wednesday 10th February – Lunar New Year Meditation 2020: Developing your stamina, willpower and self-confidence in the year of the Ox

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Concentration Enlightened Flow Integral Meditation Meditation techniques Presence and being present

Meditation – Dwelling deeply

“Meditation is an activity where we deliberately go deeper than we usually would into a subject by focusing on it for an extended period”

Dear Integral Meditators,

What is meditation and how do you do it? This weeks article looks at one paradigm for answering this question!
In the spirit of seeking, finding and abiding,

Toby

 

 

 

 

Meditation – Dwelling deeply

If someone asks you a profound question about your life that you feel like you need to think about, you might say “Let me go away and meditate on it for a while”. This use of language illustrates one main aspect of meditation, which is that it is an activity where we deliberately go deeper than we usually would into a subject by focusing on it for an extended period. From this point of view meditation is the process of learning how to “dwell deeply on things”.

Seeking, finding, abiding, remaining
When I was a Buddhist monk, this was one simple formula that I was taught. In order to meditate on an something you need to do four things:

  1. Seek it out – If you want to dwell deeply on the breathing, you first need to notice it and see it clearly. If you want to meditate on love for others, you need to know what you mean by love, and then look to bring to mind things that generate it. If you want to meditate on self-acceptance, you need to define what you mean by it, and then look for the state of acceptance. You first need to seek the thing that you want to meditate upon.
  2. Finding – As a result of seeking your meditation object, sooner or later you will “find” it. Once you have found the breathing, or the feeling of love, or the sense of self-acceptance (etc…) you have the thing that you want to meditate upon.
  3. Abiding – Now that you have your object of meditation, the task is to stay with it! To keep your attention on it with as little distraction as possible, and go deeply into your experience of it. For example, in the case of self-acceptance, you are staying with the feeling of accepting yourself, working to make it not just an intellectual recognition, but something that you can feel viscerally in your body. Make it something that you experience as a part of who you are, not just an intellectual recognition or abstract idea!
  4. Remaining – As you attempt to keep your attention ‘abiding’ on your object, you will find your attention wanting to wander. ‘Remaining’ is the process and discipline or resisting that wandering mind and, when you do get distracted, bringing your attention back to the meditation object. Occasionally you might get so distracted that you have to go back to ‘seeking and finding’ for a bit in order to re-generate the object in your minds eye.

So then, basically any meditation session involves using all four of these stages to find and dwell deeply upon the thing that you wish to meditate on and with. With this process you can learn to build concentration, develop qualities and states of mind more strongly than others, and investigate deeply any area of your life. Once you have sat down to meditate, in any moment you are either seeking, finding, abiding or remaining. Abiding is the main activity, with the other three acting as supports for this main one!

Related article: Intention, dedication, meditation

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com

Introduction to Integral Meditation & Mindfulness Practice – A four-week course

This is both a Live & Livestream, four-week course

Overview: Integral Meditation Practice (IMP) is a different kind of mind-body training, that aims to provide optimal inner peace, centeredness, energy and insight for the contemporary meditation practitioner. It combines eastern and western forms of practice, as well as ancient and modern ones into a series of integrative practices. The practices enable the meditator to remain resilient, energized and creative in the face of the multi-faceted challenges of modern life. These four classes give an introduction to IMP, in a simple, accessible manner.

The course modules:

Tues 12th, Weds 13th Jan, Module 2 – Integral Meditation Practice 1: Simplicity, awareness, positivity, creativity (Note: Wednesday class for Module 2 is online only)

Tues 19th, Weds 20th Jan, Module 3 – Integral Meditation Practice 2: Building a mind of ease, relaxation and wellbeing

Tues 26th, Weds 27th Jan, Module 4 – How to create your own integral meditations! (Note: Wednesday class for Module 4 is online only)
Read full details

Saturday 9th & 23rd January – Shamanic meditation Masterclass and Mini-retreat

In a sentence: Learn how to practice the fundamentals of the most ancient meditation tradition on the planet in a clear, practical and concise manner, and understand its relevance and value to you and the challenges that you face in your life.

  • The Masterclass on the 9th January will give an overview and introduce some simple but profound shamanic practices
  • The Mini-retreat on the 23rd will be a deeper dive into Shamanic meditation practices

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in January:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday 5/6th January – Introduction to Integral Meditation & Mindfulness Practice – A four-week course

Saturday 9th & 23rd January – Shamanic meditation Masterclass and Mini-retreat

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Stress Transformation

The Art of Non-emergency

“Spending a few minutes each day recognizing and relaxing into safety can really help you take the idea of non-emergency into an actual experience that you can use to change the quality of your life.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

I hope you have been enjoying the Winter Solstice period!

This weeks article is a fundamental integral meditation practice from my point of view, it sets up a whole bunch of good effects in your body mind and heart, and opens up a world of stability and ease.

Seasonal blessings and best wishes to all of you!

Toby

The Art of Non-emergency

The feeling of emergency
There are many things in our life that can stimulate the feeling within us that we are in a dangerous and ‘emergency’ state:

  • Uncertainty around Covid and the economy
  • Being overwhelmed by the amount of information and choices that we have to make
  • Having difficulties and unresolved conflicts in our relationships
  • Past unresolved emotions and expereinces within ourself
  • Some chemical things like just having too much caffeine in your system

The list goes on, but the essential feeling is similar; our nervous system becomes primed for ‘fight or flight’ mode much of the time, and we spend a lot of our life living as if we were in real danger of immanent disaster!

Reality checking your emergency
Let’s check this against reality:

  • How much of your day yesterday was a real actual emergency?
  • In the next day, what is the likelihood of you being in real, life-threatening danger?
  • If you gave yourself permission to really relax and take it easy for the next half-hour, would this be inviting immanent disaster?

The answers to these questions when you ask them is pretty obvious. We have spent maybe 0.05% of our life in real danger. The rest of the time is a relative non-emergency. There is very rarely a time, if ever when it is appropriate to say, ‘I have no room for any relaxation in this moment, I cannot relax!’

The discipline of non-emergency
So, our paranoid mind is saying our life is a dangerous trap, and emergency. We check this against reality and find that life is almost all a non-emergency. As a mindfulness practice we can then practice the discipline of recognizing the state of non-emergency and enjoy relaxing into it for substantial periods of our day. We can relax into non-emergency at the same time as being productive and trouble shooting problems. Non-emergency can be an active or passive state. Either way it is restorative, enjoyable and keeps us in touch with our basic sanity!

Non-emergency gives you space to deal with difficult things
Being firmly grounded in state of non-emergency gives us resilience and intelligence when navigating difficult and tense problems. Because we aren’t panicking, we don’t burn out and we don’t waste energy. We can hold uncertainty, intense emotion, volatility and so forth without being knocked off balance.

Calm under pressure – Non-emergency helps you recognize a real emergency
If your good at non-emergency, this will also help you recognize a real emergency and deal with it well. Last week my wife and I went to a first-aid for infants workshop. The essential message of the facilitator was that, in an emergency the impulse is to panic, but the best thing to do is remain calm and act systematically and rationally. Being solidly familiar with the non-emergency state will give you the presence of mind to stay calm under pressure and deal with real emergencies calmly and effectively.

Formal practice
Spending a few minutes each day recognizing and relaxing into safety can really help you take the idea of non-emergency into an actual experience that you can use to change the quality of your life. Just breathe in and recognize the non-emergency, breathe out relax into it. There you go, you’ve already begun the journey!

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com

Re-starts Monday January 11th! – 7-8.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

How can you move from coping to thriving in your life as a man?

Much is asked of men in their traditional roles as fathers and sons, partners and husbands, students and teachers, employees and employers. The men’s group is a professionally moderated and confidential forum for men. A forum is a safe place for exploring, learning and sharing the successful perspectives, skills, and strategies needed to address and manage the unique issues, problems, and triumphs in our community.
Read full details…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tues 29th & Weds 30th Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – 2021 New year releasing and inviting meditation

Re-starts Monday January 11th! – 7-8.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Biographical Energy Meditation Enlightened service Integral Awareness Life-fullness mind body connection Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

Giving back anxiety that is not yours

“Owning and dealing with your anxiety well is an important life skill, However, sometimes the anxiety we experience is not entirely our own, and the solution to it is to recognize this and sometimes simply to give it back.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

What’s the boundary between what you feel, and the feelings of those around you, and in your environment? This weeks article looks at this boundary, and how to become clearer and more aware about it.

If you enjoy the article, then you may consider this Saturday’s Mindfulness Masterclass  3-5pm Mindfulness for thriving with anxiety & uncertainty. If your interested in how to really put your anxiety to good positive use, then this is a great session to attend, you can come live or online!

In the spirit of mindful inoculation,

Toby

Giving back anxiety that is not yours

Owning and dealing with your anxiety well is an important life skill. There are often uncertainties and other causes that stimulate anxiety in our life, so knowing how to navigate this is fundamental. However, sometimes the anxiety we experience is not entirely our own, and the solution to it is to recognize this and sometimes simply to ‘give it back’.

A story
When I first started teaching meditation classes, first as a young layperson, then as a monk I would teach classes in the evening and then return back home. Often, I noticed that when I lay down to sleep that night, my body would feel uncomfortable, I would toss and turn, and I’d be having all sorts of difficult and strange trains of thought. I would have difficulty falling asleep, and often I would wake up in the middle of the night and continue to have difficult and anxious trains of thought, along with uncomfortable body sensations. At first I interpreted these as being all my own, and struggled manfully to resolve the trains of thought and emotions that were coming up. After a while however I started to recognize that actually, because I had been holding space for others in the class, I had absorbed emotional energy from the group, and what I was experiencing was actually empathic emotion and anxiety, that was not actually mine. After realizing this, I changed my strategy, recognizing and letting go of the anxiety that was not mine, and focusing on clearing out the dissonant energy from my body. Now when I do a class or coaching, noticing and releasing anxiety and energy that is not mine is mostly instinctive, but it is nevertheless vital for me to make the recognition when it occurs and is happening to me.

A few examples of when you might need to give back the anxiety

  • If your partner, close friend or family member is anxious or moody about something, and you ‘catch’ a bit of it
  • Certain atmospheres, anxieties and emotion in the office, or in your work team
  • Certain places or neighbourhoods that carry a particular dissonant energy
  • When there is large scale anxiety, such as in the recent Covid crisis, the group  anxiety amplifies and feeds off our own, and they strengthen each other
  • When someone has a type of anxiety that strongly resembles your own, and your identification with it means you absorb some empathically

In all of these cases, the anxiety is not ‘yours’ per-se, but it can infect you if you let it. The main thing to do here is to recognize that and either ‘hand it back’ so to speak, or observe it and release it from your own energy system.

You can apply this to other emotions and states
Of course, this doesn’t just apply to anxiety, it applies to many other emotional states, anger, fear, sadness. It also applies to positive emotions and states. We all have experience of being positively affected by an atmosphere, or a person or a place. When this happens, we can enjoy participating in it, rather than handing it back!

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com

 

Saturday 12thth December 3-5pm – Mindfulness masterclass: Mindfulness for thriving with anxiety & uncertainty (Live & Online)

Anxiety is a natural response to uncertainty and change, but for many of us the experience of anxiety is disturbing, upsetting, draining and stressful. This session focuses on practical ways to change your relationship to anxiety by:

  • Accepting and working with your causes of anxiety
  • Building greater awareness and appreciation of the things that give you stability and security in life
  • Learning to think effectively and wisely around uncertainties and problems that are causing you anxiety

Read full details

Tues & Weds 15th, 16th  December, 7.30-8.30pm – New moon health visualization and envisioning sessions

This session consists of :

  • An opening section attuning to the new moon energy, and return to our ‘beginners mind’ a state of ‘new beginnings’
  • A visualization section where we connect to positive imagery related to our own health, and the health of others in our life
  • An envisioning section where we seek spontaneous images and inspiration related to healing
  • A consolidation section where we focus on building the power and energy of our images, allowing them to energize and affect our health and healing the greatest degree possible

Read full details

Saturday December 19th, 2.30-5pm – Integral meditation deep dive mini-retreat

These 2.5 hour meditation ‘mini-retreats’ are a chance to go into much deeper meditation states than you would be able to in your own personal daily practice, or even if you came to a one hour class. Using sitting meditation methods in combination with breathing techniques, Toby will guide you into deep meditation flow states that…read full details

Tues 22nd & Weds 23rd Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation

About the class: The Winter Solstice is deepest point of Winter in the northern hemisphere, the point of maximum outer darkness & the shortest day.

In Celtic the name of the winter solstice in ‘Alban Arthan’ of ‘The Light of Arthur’. In this case Arthur refers to the Sun God who, at this time of maximum darkness in the year dies and is reborn in the world of nature and within ourselves…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Saturday 12thth December 3-5pm – Mindfulness masterclass: Mindfulness for thriving with anxiety & uncertainty

Tues & Weds 15th, 16th  December, 7.30-8.30pm – New moon health visualization and envisioning sessions

Saturday December 19th, 2.30-5pm – Integral meditation deep dive mini-retreat

Tues 22nd & Weds 23rd Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Tues 29th & Weds 30th Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – 2021 New year releasing and inviting meditation

Ongoing – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Integral Meditation Asia

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