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Mindful of what you believe is possible

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“If you look at your thoughts from moment to moment, you’ll see that they are often affirmations of your beliefs. They capture in a phrase what you believe is or is not possible”

 

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at the relationship between our thoughts and what we believe is possible (or not) in our life.

In the spirit of opening to possibilities,

Toby


Mindful of what you believe is possible 

A belief you have is a subjective feeling ( not a fact) and idea about what is possible and not possible in your life. The beliefs that you have create strong moods, emotions and atmospheres about what think you can and can’t do. They influence your actions in a very real way.
If you look at your thoughts from moment to moment, you’ll see that they are often affirmations of your beliefs. They capture in a phrase what you believe is or is not possible. So, to change a belief, you need to:

  1. Become aware of the thought that summarizes the belief in your mind
  2. Make small, incremental adjustments to the structure of the thought, changing what you believe to be possible in a positive way.
  3. Once you’ve made one small adjustment, then make another, and another, perhaps 3-4 adjustments in total. So now you have a new belief, and one that opens a doorway to a whole range of positive moods, emotions and actions in your life!

Here are two examples of what I mean:

Around work:

  1. Initial thought affirming the belief – “Two projects at the same time is already difficult, there is no way I can cope with a third”
  2. First adjustment – “Adding a third project to my schedule will be challenging” (but possible!)
  3. Second adjustment – “If I’m going to take on a third project I’m going to need to be more organized than I am now”.
  4. Third Adjustment – “I’m going to enjoy the challenge of taking on a third project at work, and the growth in income that it will afford me!”

So, you can see, with the final adjustment, a new belief, atmosphere, and sense of possibility is created around the same situation.

In an unhealthy relationship:

  1. Initial thought: “I can’t bear to leave this relationship; the thought fills me with fear and sadness”
  2. First adjustment: “I accept that I can’t bear to leave this relationship, but I know its time”
  3. Second: “I can leave this relationship, even though its going to be challenging”
  4. Final: “Because I value myself and my wellbeing, I am going to leave this relationship, and its going to be ok”

Again, you can see that by gradually changing the thought structure, progressively and gradually the belief and mood about what is possible changes.

So, the basic mindful process here is:

  1. Select the life challenge that you want to work on changing your beliefs around
  2. Observe your current beliefs around what you think is possible, capture it in a sentence
  3. Create a 3-4 stage adjustment in that sentence, to gradually change that belief, and open a door to a new set of moods, possibilities and actions in that situation!

Enjoy opening to new ideas of what is possible for you!

Related articleThoughts As Affirmations: Three Questions To Help Make Your Thoughts Your Allies

Article and pictures © Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com   


All Courses at Integral Meditation Asia 

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Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, March 2nd, 16th, 30th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Tues & Weds 5th/6th March – Monthly astrological meditation – Pisces – Mindful of our beliefs and sub-conscious mind

Tues 19th & Weds 20th March – Spring equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Saturday 16th March, 9.30am-12.30pm – Meditation for self healing and creating high levels of energy

FOR BEGINNERS: Saturday 30th March, 11-12.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Saturday 30th March 2-5.30pm – Meditations for developing the language of your shadow self

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Meditation for cultivating vitality – Three practices

Below are three simple ways in which you can build vital energy in your body through meditation. They can be practised individually or in combination. They have the general meditation benefit of calming and focusing the body-mind, with the addition of specifically promoting the build-up and flow of life-force through the body.

Method 1 – Relaxing into tension:
Rather than fighting and seeking to get rid of tension, discomfort or fatigue in your body, make a point of moving towards it and relaxing into it. Try and locate the principal areas of tension in your body. Once you have identified them, take some time to work with each one in turn. Take a few breaths where as you inhale you allow yourself to feel the tension in that part of the body. Then, as you exhale relax into it and release. The principle here is that, if you focus attention on the area of the body where energy is blocked and work on releasing it, that will allow new energy and vitality to flow into that area of the body. Let your body relax so that vital energy can flow easily to areas where it is needed.

Method 2 – Breathing into your belly
In both the Zen and Qi gong traditions of meditation, there is a lot of emphasis upon breathing into the belly area, where the core of your body’s life-force (see my article on the Dan-tiens in qi gong) is said to be located. Initially, simply placing the palm of one hand on your belly, just beneath the belly button, and focusing on the rising and falling of the abdomen is a good way to start. Then once you have basic familiarity, you can visualize a ball of light about the size of a tennis ball sitting within the centre of the lower belly area. As you breathe in, see the ball glowing gently with vitality and life-force. As you breathe out see the light and energy from the ball expanding out into the rest of your body, filling it with energy. If you do this consistently, you will find that you have a real, tangible feeling of this energy building and expanding as you do the exercise.

Method 2 – Sitting like a pyramid
If you want to bring a sense of solidity and grounded-ness into your belly breathing, imagine your body as being like a pyramid as you sit and do the belly breathing. Imagine your hips and belly are like the broad base of the pyramid, with your chest and head tapering up to a point, so your hips and belly are super stable and broad. As you breathe in and out of the belly, release tension from your upper body downwards into the belly and hips, building the feeling of strength and stability.

Adding a smile
A final simple method you can combine with any of the above methods; add a gentle half smile into the mix:

  • As you release tension from the parts of your body, smile to them gently and warmly
  • As you breathe in and out of the belly, imagine the energy is warm and smiling, positively radiating out from the belly into the rest of the body.

Wishing you enjoyment with your experience of mindful vitality!

Related articles: 
Mindful Centring – three sitting positions
Breathing from your belly

Article and picture © Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com 


All Courses at Integral Meditation Asia for February

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, 16th & 23rd February – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturday 23rd February 11-12.30pm –   Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Saturday 23rd February, 3.30-5.30pm – Developing Your Self-Confidence Through Mindfulness Workshop


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Mindful sitting – Three centring positions

“The way you sit and stand are psychological positions as well as a physical ones. Its worth doing them consciously.”

Here are three simple ways to centre yourself while sitting. You can practise them individually or together, one after the other. Each of them has a slightly different effect and benefit, all of them are simple and easy to do once you have tried them a few times. They are designed to encourage a feeling in the body that is helpful both to our physical health and energy levels as well as our psychological wellbeing. They can be done standing as well as sitting.

Position 1 – Sitting like a puppet: Sit upright in a chair, imagine that you have a piece of string attached to the crown of your head. Feel it pulling your head neck and torso up a couple of centimetres, so that your posture is upright and vertical. Now imagine you are hanging from the string. Relax all the muscles in the body as much as you can, so that the only muscle work that your body is doing is to keep itself upright. For example, your face does not need to hold any tension for the body to be upright. Progressively go through all the main areas of your body, relaxing them as much as possible. Then simply notice what this feels like, focusing your attention on it for a while.

Often when we are sitting or standing we are holding a lot of unnecessary tension in our body, the idea here is to create a habitual way of sitting that is ergonomic as well as relaxing.

Position 2 – The half-smile: Become aware of the expression on your face. Spend a few moments relaxing the muscles in the face and bringing it into a neutral expression. Then raise the corners of your mouth a few millimetres so that your expression describes a warm half-smile. As you breathe in, focus on the feeling of the expression, as you breathe out, extend the feeling of the expression to the rest of your body, and if you like to any moods, emotions or thoughts in your mind. Centre yourself around your facial expression for a short while, being curious about the effect that it has on you.

Its very easy to spend long periods of the day with holding tension and emotion in our expression that are not helping us. The half-smile helps us to counter this tendency.

Position 3 – Sitting with confidence: The half-smile expression already invites a feeling of gentle self-confidence. Becoming more aware of the body, make small adjustments that help you connect to a feeling of confidence. Even if you don’t feel immediately confident, adopt a posture that helps you start to move that way; shoulders and chest open and relaxed, hands and limbs relaxed. Like the other two positions, practice the posture so that the body becomes familiar with it, and it becomes a habitual, default body posture for you, even when you are under pressure.

So, there you go, three body positions to practice centring yourself mindfully around anytime!

Article and picture © Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com 


Shadow Coaching with Toby February Special Offer

Special offer of 15% off Toby’s shadow coaching 3 session package up to end Thursday 14th February. for full details click HERE!
“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” – Carl Jung


All Courses at Integral Meditation Asia for February

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am, 16th & 23rd February – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Tues & Weds February 12/13th – Monthly astrological meditation – Aquarius: Developing your inner knowing and self-knowledge

Saturday 23rd February 11-12.30pm –   Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Saturday 23rd February, 3.30-5.30pm – Developing Your Self-Confidence Through Mindfulness Workshop


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Understanding and working with your Guardian Angel

Dear  Integral Meditators,

Every now and again I do an article on something a little esoteric, usually informed by what is going on in my own meditation process. This week’s article is on how to understand work mindfully with the idea of your Guardian Angel.
If you enjoy it, then on Sunday 27th January, 2-5pm I’ll be facilitating a Meditations for connecting to and working with your Guardian Angel workshop.

In the spirit of our inner guidance,

Toby


Working with your Guardian Angel

All of the great wisdom traditions speak of speak of spiritual guardians who can offer us support, guidance and protection on our journey through life. What I am going to offer here is two working definitions of your Guardian Angel that will enable you to start working with it, and the idea of it in a practical manner.

1. If there is a guiding, universal spirit of some kind, and it is benevolent towards us, then your guardian angel is that spiritual force, appearing in the image of a personal guardian.
If you believe in any way that there is a spiritual force that is bigger than all of us and that is working for our wellbeing, then our Guardian Angel the part of that spiritual force that guides and protects us as individuals. Each of us has our ‘own’ Guardian Angel. It could be visualized in a humanoid form, as a light or actually in a number of other ways. The way in which we imagine it enables us to connect to that force in a way that enables us to trust it, feel protected by it and let its influence into our life.
Having understood our Guardian Angel in this way, we can start to relate to it in a personalized, subjective manner, visualizing it and connecting to it as a spiritual friend, ally and confidante.

2. Our Guardian Angel is that part of the ‘divine plan’ that accompanied our own divine spark or spirit when it split off from source at the beginning of this cycle of creation. Its function is to help us to complete our own particular piece of that ‘divine plan’.
This is a slightly deeper definition that follows (in large part) the definition of Dion Fortune in the Mystical Qabalah. Here are two analogies that may help you to relate to this definition:

 Your guardian angel as ‘spiritual software’ – If you think about your spiritual self as being like the original core and centre of your being, then your Guardian Angel is like a special piece of ‘software’ that was built in in order to help you in your path of personal growth. It is designed to help, support, protect, and to provide healing and guidance as your  soul treads its path of evolution in this life. It also has the capacity to connect with and communicate with the Guardian Angels of those around you, communicating and co-ordinating your life paths together in supportive ways.
As R2D2 – You may recall in the first Star Wars movie, Luke Skyalker had an assistant droid robot called R2D2. When Luke was flying his X-wing fighter craft in combat, R2D2 would be sitting behind him in the craft providing information and assistance as he flew. So, in this analogy, you are the fighter pilot, and your guardian Angel is like R2D2, giving you help and assistance as you experience the ‘combat’ of your life path. It is trying to help you even without your awareness, but when you consciously engage with it, then you can start to leverage to a much greater degree on the support that is available.

A simple meditation on and with your Guardian Angel
Sit quietly and centre. Imagine the presence of your Guardian Angel as a light and energy centred in between your shoulder blades, sitting half in and half out of your physical body. The ‘heart centre’ of your guardian angel is sitting just behind your own heart centre/chakra. Feel the energy of your Guardian Angel strengthening and supporting your body, your heart and your mind. If you like you can also imagine the ‘wings’ of your Guardian Angel enfolding and protecting your energy field, forming a circle around you. As you sit, gently start to commune with your Angel, receive its love, talk to it about any issues you want feedback on, mostly just cultivate awareness of its presence, and allow that to inform your experiences as you go through your day.

© Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation AsiaOngoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am :5th & 12th January – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturdays January 5th & 19th, 4-5.30pm – Mindfulness group coaching sessions with Toby

Saturday 19th January 2.15-3.45pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Saturday 26th January, 1-4pm – Growing your mindful freedom meditation workshop

Sunday 27th January, 2-5pm – Meditations for connecting to and working with your Guardian Angel

FEBRUARY
Satruday 9th February, 9.30-12.30 – Going from overwhelmed to overwell meditation workshop


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Six aspects of mindful self-leadership – (Channeling your inner mountain-goat)

Dear  Integral Meditators,

Setting your own pace and direction in life is a big key to personal fulfilment and esteem. In the article below I detail six aspects of self-leadership that I have found to be useful in terms of my own path.

In the spirit of self-leadership,

Toby

 

 


Six aspects of mindful self-leadership – (Channeling your inner mountain-goat)

We can receive support and encouragement from others in our life, but finally we are the ones who are responsible for choosing what we want, and taking the direction that we want to go in. Good mindful self-leadership skill are among the most important qualities that you can develop if you are looking for happiness and personal fulfillment. Here are six aspects of self-leadership that it is worthwhile being aware of and practicing.

Setting your own pace and giving yourself permission
As mammals we are always looking left and right to see what people around us are doing, and making comparisons between ‘where we are, and where they are’. This can result in us speeding up or slowing down in reaction to what’s around. The set your own pace means  know what you want, and set the right pace for you to get things done in the way you want. If everyone is going out to party, and your tired out, then stay in. If everyone else is telling you to go in one direction, but your inner signals are telling you not to, then listen to them and act accordingly. Know yourself and set your own pace and speed.

The courage of acceptance
Accepting who you are, what you are feeling, the situation in front of you. Accepting your anxiety or excitement, your loneliness, your passion or insecurity. Accept and work with what is really present for you in this moment, don’t live in denial of it. This gives you your basic ‘reality orientation’ from which you can then proceed to lead yourself to where you want to go.

Owning your goals and taking responsibility 
What are the goals that when you hold them in your heart you really notice a tangible movement toward enthusiasm, excitement, passion? Identifying the goals that are really, truly important to you, yours and not other peoples is super important. From there the task becomes ‘What can I do today to take myself one step closer to this goal?’ In other words taking full personal responsibility to turning your abstract goal into a tangible reality, one action at a time.

Going beyond boredom and novelty
Going beyond boredom and novelty means having the capacity to be process oriented, consistent, and having the mental stamina to keep on going beyond the point where you can rely on the excitement of a new inspiration and enthusiasm.

Being ok with alone
Finally, if you are doing what you want, in the way that you want to do it, this may (not always, but sometimes) mean that you have to spend periods of time alone, in your own company and not being encouraged or affirmed by others. If you are leading from the front, then it can feel like an isolated position to be in. Being comfortable with that, and even enjoying it enables you to take the direction needed, without fear of loneliness.

Don’t lie to yourself, or make promises to yourself that you don’t keep
This final point is important, because often we can be more conscientious about our promises to others than we are in our conversation with ourself. If you are at all interested in building self-leadership and self-esteem, then really work on keeping your commitments to yourself.

Channeling your inner mountain-goat
One image I like for self-leadership (relating to the start sign of Capricorn) is that of a mountain goat. See yourself and your path of self-leadership as a mountain goat, patiently and agile-ly traveling up a steep mountainside. You have the strength, the patience and the ingenuity to lead yourself all the way to the top. No matter what the obstacles or difficulties you persist, all the way to the peak of your mountain!

Related articlesMindfully dancing between doing and being
Effortless effort – The cycle of mindful growth

© Toby Ouvry 2019, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation AsiaOngoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am :5th & 12th January – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturdays January 5th & 19th, 4-5.30pm – Mindfulness group coaching sessions with Toby

Tues & Weds January 1st, 2nd, 7.30-8.30pm – New year balancing and renewing meditation

Tues & weds January 8th & 9th – Monthly astrological meditation – Capricorn; developing your inner self-leadership 

Saturday 19th January 2.15-3.45pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever

Saturday 26th January, 1-4pm – Growing your mindful freedom meditation workshop

FEBRUARY
Satruday 9th February, 9.30-12.30 – Going from overwhelmed to overwell meditation workshop


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Relaxing into your potential – Renewal meditation & recording

Dear  Integral Meditators,

I hope your winter Solstice and Christmas breaks are going great! We’re now in that little pocket of time between Christmas and the new year. Here’s a half hour meditation on renewal that I recorded in class recently (click to listen and/or download). It’s one that I really enjoy and find useful. A basic description of the meditation is below.

In the spirit of renewal,

Toby


Renewal

Christmas comes around the same time as the winter solstice (northern hemisphere the 21st/22nd December). It is the time when the light of the sun, having reached its lowest ebb begins to gradually become stronger once more, eventually taking us into spring. Here is a simple meditation image that I like to contemplate around this time:

  • Imagine you are a seed in the ground in a winter landscape. Up until now you have been dormant, almost as if dead, but now at this time of the year something awakens deep within you; a spark of light, an awakening of life, right within the centre or core of yourself as a seed.
  • As you meditate on the image of the seed, feel a renewal of light and life deep within your heart of hearts; an awakening of the first seeds of your highest potential as you move forward in to a new cycle of life in the new year.
  • You may not know what this new cycle of life will bring, but for now there is no need to worry about that. For now simply sit quietly and acknowledge the first awakening of this new life deep within you and allow it to nurture and renew you.
© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

Until January 8th: Special offer of 15% off on Toby’s Mindful goals coaching

Get your new year started on the right note1 This is a 1:1 coaching service with Toby that focuses upon how you can use engaged mindfulness and meditation as a way of achieving specific goals in your life.

  • Are you looking for concrete ways that you can combine improving your mental peace and centeredness with moving forward toward your goals in life?
  • Do you sometimes find yourself struggling to bridge the gap between your life goals and your daily actions/experiences?
  • Would you like to have a personally created mindfulness training program designed specifically for your needs and to help you achieve what you want in life? …click here for full details!

Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation AsiaOngoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am :5th & 12th January – Qi Gong workout and meditation class
Saturdays January 5th & 19th, 4-5.30pm – Mindfulness group coaching sessions with Toby
Tues & Weds January 1st, 2nd, 7.30-8.30pm – New year balancing and renewing meditation
Tues & weds January 8th & 9th – Monthly astrological meditation – Capricorn; developing your inner self-leadership 
Saturday 19th January 2-3.30pm – Get your meditation practice started now- The shortest and most time effective meditation workshop ever
Saturday 26th January, 1-4pm – Growing your mindful freedom meditation workshop

FEBRUARY
Satruday 9th February, 9.30-12.30 – Going from overwhelmed to overwell meditation workshop


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Mindful of your moods, emotions and dispositions

Dear  Integral Meditators,

In the the foreground or background of each moment you experience, there is a mood, emotion and ‘atmosphere’. The article below explores how to start working with these mindfully in your life.

In the spirit of moods and atmospheres,

Toby

 


Engaged Mindfulness book is on a special 10% offer for the next until end Tuesday 11th Dec)

Christmas is coming up, if you are looking for a meaningful, inexpensive present to pass out to friends, why not order a few copies of ‘Engaged Mindfulness’? It’s a short, 45 page primer on integral mindfulness, broken up into short 1-2page sections. Click here to order your copies…


Mindful of your moods, emotions and dispositions

This article focuses on how you can start to work with emotions, moods and dispositions, for the purposes of enjoyment, as well as becoming more effective in your life. Let’s start with a few definitions:
Emotions are temporary energetic reactions to particular events; what someone said to you, something that you hoped for not happening, something unpredictable occurring, an experience of good fortune etc. Although they are temporary, if you start watching them you’ll start to notice that have a particular habitual range emotions that you use in your life. This is rather like an artist who has a love or habit of working with a particular colour range.
Moods are emotions that you tend to spend quite a lot of time in. They become the background ‘atmospheres’ within which you live much of your life. Anxiety or curiousity, lightness or heaviness, resentment or appreciation, optimism or pessimism are all examples. They are like the typical ‘weather’ that you might expect to experience in a country at a particular time of year and season.
Dispositions are what you might think of as the primary moods that we tend to live in. We spend such a lot of time in them that they become pretty much our personality; they form some of the basic ways in which we experience our self as a personality.

Something to notice about emotions, moods and dispositions is that you are pretty much always in one – it’s useful to be aware of and take it into account because they open or close avenues of possibility and action for us in each moment. For example, an attitude of optimism opens up emotions of appreciation, pleasure and lightness, but may make us blind to certain problems that we need to look at realistically. Similarly, an attitude of pessimism closes certain desirable emotional states, but also invites some interesting insights into areas of risk in our life that we might do well to look at.
Simply asking ‘What are the moods and emotions present for me in this situation?’ will make us aware of what is there and how it is affecting us.

Centring in difficult moods and emotions
If you are experiencing a difficult mood or emotion, then, rather than try and shift out of it or get rid of it immediately, it can often be most useful to simply recognize it, and centre yourself, so that it isn’t keeping you off balance. Once you are aware and have centred yourself, you can them make a choice whether you want to try and shift out of the mood/emotion or stay with it and see what it has to offer you in that moment.

Identifying your habitual range of mood and emotion.
If you watch your moods, emotions and dispositions you’ll start to have a sense of the ‘mood options’ that you have available to you. You can start to cultivate particular emotions and moods in particular situations where they will serve you particularly well.
You’ll also notice that you have particularly inspiring moods and emotions within your range that open up avenues of action and possibility that will help you go experience life better in the moment and get you where you want to go. So consciously cultivating these moods is a good idea! For example, I have a little post-it message on the picture above my lap-top right now that says, ‘Everything is possible!’ This reminds me to open to and live in a mood that is particularly meaningful and helpful to me right now.
So, a good mindful question to go with this last section might be ‘What mood or emotion can I cultivate that would serve me best in this situation?

© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation AsiaOngoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am 1st,15th, 22nd, 29th December – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Tues & Weds, 4th, 5th December – Monthly Astrological meditation – on ‘Sagittarius – I perceive/understand’

Saturdays December 15th & 22nd – Mindfulness group coaching sessions with Toby

Saturday 15th December, 1-4pm – Integral meditation practice: Optimize your inner calm, strength and energy

Tues & Weds Dec 18/19th, 7.30-8.30pm – Winter Solstice balancing & renewing meditation


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Insight Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation and Psychology Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Presence and being present spiritual intelligence

Discovering your mindful compassion – Seven ways

Dear  Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at compassion, and how you can go about developing a living, experiential connection to it through mindfulness. The integral TuesdayWednesday  and Space2B classes will be on compassion for the rest of the month…
On Saturday the 17th morning there is the The Six Qi Healing sounds: Qi gong For Self-Healing and Inner Balance Workshop. Then in the afternoon 4.30-6pm the Mindfulness group coaching,

In the spirit of compassion,

Toby


Special offer: 10% off on Life-Fullness Life coaching sign ups from now until Wednesday 21st NovemberThe Life-Fullness Integral Coaching Program (LICP) is an integral form of 1:1 coaching with Toby that you can sign up for periods of six-months or three-months at a time. It is mindfulness oriented personal coaching that focuses upon the development of three R’s:

  • Re-generate your creative self and curiosity in life
  • Re-connect to deeper levels of motivation and meaning within yourself, your relationships and your career
  • Re-awakening to a sense of your own inner confidence, energy and personal power

Click here for full details of the Life-fulness program


Discovering your mindful compassion – Seven ways

Compassion can be deeply transformative. Learning to feel, see and act from compassion can have a huge practical impact on our potential for self-healing, finding purpose in our life, and acting with creative benevolence. Below are a few pointers designed to help you connect to your own present compassion and grow its presence in your life.

Your own present experience of compassion –  It’s nice to begin by reflecting. What does compassion mean to you? Can you recall times when you have experienced it? What did it feel like when you were compassionate? What tends to stimulate it? What is your experience of receiving compassion, not just giving it? Pop these questions to yourself and see where they lead you…Make compassion personal to you, a conscious part of your story.
A definition of compassion – One useful definition of compassion is that it is a state of mind that observes suffering with empathy and wishes where possible to alleviate that pain.  A pre-requisite of compassion is that we care about the person (ourself, others) that we are observing. Love, warmth, caring are the basis for compassion.
Compassion begins with awareness – At the root of compassion is awareness. If you want to have compassion for yourself, you need to be able to sit with your own pain, suffering and discomfort. You must be able to look at it, acknowledge it and accept it. This in itself is a powerful act of compassion. Similarly, awareness of other people’s pain is the beginning of compassion for them. You may have had the experience of being in pain yourself, and then a friend really seeing and acknowledging your pain, extending their support to you. Even if they couldn’t do anything about it, just knowing they understand and they care is a real supporting force for us. Acknowledging the pain of ourself and others with care builds a powerful basis for compassion.
Creating reciprocal loops of compassion – Like love, we need to develop the capacity to give and receive compassion between ourself and others. When we are in pain we need to be able to open to and receive the support of others. When we see others in pain we can give compassion. The idea is to create a wealth of compassion in our life. If we give too much without receiving, we burn out. If we receive without giving, we can become a burden on others.
Practising open and closed compassion – Sometimes we can practice compassion unconditionally, in a completely empathetic, open state. But this is not always appropriate. We need to also know how to ‘close’ our energy system and be more objective with our compassion sometimes. There is definitely such a thing as objective compassion, where we are extending concern to others without drowning in their pain and maintaining a clear boundary around what is ‘theirs’ and what is ‘mine’ to deal with.
Avoiding the saviour complex – Don’t be the person that gets weird kicks from ‘saving’ other people, the world doesn’t need you. Save yourself from your own delusions first, and then with compassion empower others.
Lightness and playfulness are the friend of compassion – In the presence of pain it can be tempting to get all heavy about it. Without dismissing or avoiding the real suffering that is there, it is a positive skill to bring humour and lightness to pain. Explore what ‘playful compassion’ feels like.

A beginning – Sitting quietly, become aware of an aspect of your own pain or suffering, on whatever level (physical, emotional etc). Breathing smoothly and deeply (65-70% of lung capacity), spend a few minutes extending compassion to yourself as you breathe in, and relaxing into the pain as you breathe out. Release what pain you can, but don’t try and force yourself to release the pain before you are ready. Just hold the space and breathe with compassion.

© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation AsiaOngoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15am 1st,15th, 22nd, 29th December – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturdays November 17th & 24th, 4.30-6pm – Mindfulness group coaching sessions with Toby

Saturday 17th November 9.30am-1pm – The Six Qi Healing sounds: Qi gong For Self-Healing and Inner Balance Workshop

Saturday 24th November 9.30am-12.30pm – Finding simplicity in the complexity – Meditation from the perspective of Zen

DECEMBER
Saturday 1st December 11am-12.30pm
 –  Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Saturday 15th December, 1-4pm – Integral meditation practice: Optimize your inner calm, strength and energy


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Energy Meditation Greenworld Meditation Inner vision Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Primal Spirituality Shadow meditation

Developing your inner vision (Mindful composting)

Dear  Integral Meditators,

As we meditate we develop our inner vision. This gives rise over time to various experiences of ‘spiritual light and darkness’ that it’s worth spending a bit of time pausing and reflecting upon before jumping to conclusions. In the article below I offer one of my own stories about this.
We’ll be exploring the theme in this weeks Deepavali meditations, and its kind of implicit in the Qi gong meditation we do on Saturday mornings.

In the spirit of clear vision,

Toby

 


Developing your inner vision: The darkness that you encounter in meditation may not be what you think! (Mindful composting)

If you meditate consistently over a period of time, at some point you are going to awaken one or other of your faculties of inner vision. This whole area is a big one, but I want to share just one short story now.
When I first started meditating, I had inadvertently, through some basic hatha yoga, activated my kundalini. As a result, I started to have visions, and the visions that I saw were quite varied, but as often as not they were very dark, dense and apparently malevolent in nature. It seemed to happen in waves, for days at a time, then going away, only to come back at a later time. I seemed to encounter dark beings within the dark energy, with hooked noses, long hands and so forth, very Harry Potter.
I found this a bit disconcerting and tried to force these evil visions away with prayers of protection, power mantras and all this type of thing, but the visions persisted causing a certain degree of fear and anxiety. I thought that I must be doing something wrong in my meditation, or I had some form of evil in me that must be magnetizing these funny beings to me.
I was able to clarify the situation as a result of starting to make my own compost. I noticed that when I lay down to bed at night, if I had been doing any work in the garden, and in particular doing composting work, then I would almost always see these same dark beings in my inner vision as I went to sleep. It was at this time also that I started to read a little bit on the idea of nature elementals, the spiritual beings who over-light the fundamental life and death processes of nature. Putting two and two together I realized that what I was seeing in my inner vision was not the forces of darkness in an evil sense, but rather the natural elemental forces of death, decay and breaking down as they exist in the natural world.
These natural forces of death and decay in the natural world are just as important as the life giving forces, and are in no way malevolent. However, for a human such as me encountering them for the first time, they often produce a reaction of confusion and aversion. Once I had clearly understood who and what they were, my fear for them dissolved and I learned to welcome them into my awareness in the same way that I welcomed light, blissful and radiant experiences.
When we start to develop our inner vision we may have some experiences that we do not understand, but it is important not to jump to conclusions too quickly, as what we see may not be what we think it is!

© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Upcoming Courses at Integral Meditation AsiaOngoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation Classes at Basic Essence with Toby

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation Classes at One Heart with Toby (East coast)

Monday 6.15-7.15 & Wednesday 12.15-1.15 – Integral Meditation classes at Space2B on Stanley Street

Saturday mornings 9-10.15: November 3rd,10th – Qi Gong workout and meditation class

Saturdays November 17th & 24th, 4.30-6pm – Mindfulness group coaching sessions with Toby

Tues 6th & Weds 7th November – Deepavali meditation – Connecting to your inner-light

Saturday 17th November 9.30am-1pm – The Six Qi Healing sounds: Qi gong For Self-Healing and Inner Balance Workshop

Saturday 24th November 9.30am-12.30pm – Finding simplicity in the complexity – Meditation from the perspective of Zen

DECEMBER
Saturday 15th December, 1-4pm – Integral meditation practice: Optimize your inner calm, strength and energy


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Biographical creative imagery Inner vision Insight Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Presence and being present

Playing your roles with freedom

Dear  Integral Meditators,

This weeks articles looks at how you can live your life and play your life-roles with greater freedom and authenticity, using mindfulness.

In the spirit freedom in our roles,

Toby


Playing your roles with freedom – The observer self

Observing the world through our roles


For most of us, much of our sense of ‘I’ or ‘self’ is taken up by the different roles that we play in life. For example, professionally we may be a manager, a technician, a banker, a designer. Our family roles take up a huge chunk of our identity; mother, father, son, daughter, elder brother, younger sister. There are many other roles; the sports person, the talker, the cook, the pacifier, the fixer, the list goes on. If you were to try and bring to mind the top three or four roles that you are most identified with in your life, what would they be?
The challenge with these roles is that because we identify with them so closely, we tend observe our world, define ourselves and act from them without choice. They define the person we are and what we are capable of. Sometimes identifying with a particular role has benefits and serves us well. But at other times being over-identified with our roles and attached to them causes us a lot of unnecessary suffering and stress. It prevents us from seeing possibilities and fulfilling our potential.

Stepping out of our roles and becoming the observer


So, with mindfulness we learn to step out of our roles, observing ourself and our world with bare attention, as a mere observer.  In this regard it can be very valuable to deliberately and consciously step out of roles we are identified with. For example:

  • As a father I might choose to deliberately step out of my identification with that role, and simply observe my daughter and experience of her from a witnessing position
  • As a meditation teacher I can choose to ‘drop the label’ and observe myself as if I was a no-one.
  • I can step out of my habitual patterns as a business man, and see my daily business activities ‘as if for the first time’, or like a ‘fly on the wall’.

In these examples, I am deliberately stepping out of a role, putting it down, and trying to not see my world coloured by the lens of that role.

Stepping back into our roles with freedom and enthusiasm


Once we are regularly stepping out of our roles, and dis-identifying with them, we can then practice ‘putting them back on’. We can play our roles with enthusiasm and passion, but also with the knowledge that we are not those roles. We are capable of putting them down and stepping out of them when we wish to. We are able to play our roles in life with freedom, enthusiasm and creativity. Our dis-identification with them helps us to play the roles better and more fully.

Exercise: Stepping in and out of our ‘role costumes’


Imagine you have a cupboard in your home. In that cupboard are a collection of costumes, clothes, hats and so on that relate to all the roles you play in your life; mother, daughter, professional trader, lover, friend etc… Take a little time to look thru all these different clothing and costumes. You are none of these costumes, but you put them on in your life, to play your roles. You can play them fully, with commitment and power, but when your done, you know you can take off the costume and put it back in the cupboard. On a deeper level your identity is simply as the observer, the witness, dancing in an out of your roles!

Related articleNo Name (Meditation Spaghetti Western Style)

© Toby Ouvry 2018, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology