Category: Meditating on the Self

Categories
Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

Representing your values – Mindful self-trust 

“The more we are able to access the innate feeling of trusting ourself, the more relaxed and confident we will then tend to feel about our ability to represent our values consistently and capably; we feel we are in integrity with ourself.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at self-trust as a quality we can develop through mindfulness. If you enjoy it, we will be meditating on it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class this week.

Beneath the main article you can also find another one on overcoming passivity, in case you missed it!
In the spirit of self-trust,

Toby

 

 

Representing your values – Mindful self-trust

One fundamental way to build your own self-esteem and trust is to act with integrity, which is to say in accordance with your own values. If you are consistently speaking acting and being in a way that you are representing yourself appropriately, then you are going to feel secure within yourself, and that you are in the presence of someone trustworthy.
Here is a simple three stage cycle that you can use to build trust in yourself and your integrity.

Intention – “How can I act with integrity in this situation, what are my values here?” Firstly, in any given situation you need to turn up with the intention to represent your own values.
Consistency and reliability – “Am I consistently following through with my values?” Secondly, you need to be consistent about it. It’s not enough to begin with the intention, but then forget it half way and end up acting in a way that doesn’t represent our values at all.
Capability – “What are the skills I need to represent myself with integrity here?” Thirdly, you need to assess your capability to act in accordance with your values. Sometimes it is not that you don’t want to, or that you aren’t consistently trying, it is just that you lack the skill and capability to act in such a way. In this case you need to learn the appropriate skill to become capable.

Doing what you say you will do
So of course, there are a huge number of ways that these three stages can play out according to circumstance, but on a simple level it’s about doing what you say (to yourself) you will do, and demonstrating to yourself on a daily basis that you are trustworthy and can be relied upon.

  • If you say to yourself you are going to do some research into starting a new business tomorrow, then tomorrow do the research
  • If you say to yourself that you are going to talk to your partner about the difficult subject you have both been avoiding, then make sure you do so!
  • If you are being bullied at work and say your going to learn how to handle it better, then go and find someone who can teach you or coach you. If you don’t have the capability, then learn it

The state of self-trust
The state we are aiming for here is one that, when we are in our own company, we feel as if we are with someone whom we feel comfortable trusting

  • We trust the power of our conscious intention
  • We feel we can rely on ourself and our consistency
  • We may not have all the skills to deal with all scenarios, but we can trust ourselves to be pro-active, and acquire the skills we lack (when we do lack them) to become capable and effective

The feeling of trust invites integrity
The more we are able to access the innate feeling of trusting ourself, the more relaxed and confident we will then tend to feel about our ability to represent ourself and our values consistently and capably; we feel we are in integrity with ourself. It becomes a mutually enhancing circle of integrity and trust that we can use to feel energised and enthusiastic about our life, even and particularly when we are under pressure or navigating uncertainty.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed this article: Overcoming passivity (Centered, responsive, creative)

Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us. As a result, it is easier for us to turn toward our challenges, to face them directly, and respond consciously, creatively and dynamically to them. This in turn increases our sense of positive participation in and enjoyment of life. It becomes a playground for us to learn, develop and get stuck into, rather than a frightening, intimidating trap waiting to get us!
Read full article

Watch Toby’s 45 Second mindfulness video  – Overcoming passivity:

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

 

 

 

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Energy Meditation Enlightened Flow Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation Recordings mind body connection Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present Uncategorized

Overcoming passivity

 

“Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us.”

Dear Toby,
Mindfulness, well practiced should make us calmer, but not more passive. In the article below I explore a bit of the process whereby we can become more dynamically engaged in our life by being more mindful.
Quick practical note, the timings for the Psychic Self-Defence Masterclass and Mini-retreat have now been adjusted to be both on Saturday 27th March, from 10.30-12.30, and then 1.15-4.15.

In the spirit of pro-activity,

Toby

 

 

Overcoming passivity (Centered, responsive, creative)

Uncentered, anxious, passive
When we feel off balance mentally and emotionally, we naturally become more vulnerable to anxiety. When we are anxious, the tendency to avoid problems, challenges and stress instinctively causes us to avoid thinking about them, or to think fearfully. When we do this we become passive, non-creative and procrastinate. We then only act when we have to, as a reaction at the last minute, that we may not have thought through.

Part of the benefit of an engaged mindfulness practice is that, because we are more centered, we tend to feel less intimidated by our challenges, and by the anxiety that they stimulate within us. As a result, it is easier for us to turn toward our challenges, to face them directly, and respond consciously, creatively and dynamically to them. This in turn increases our sense of positive participation in and enjoyment of life. It becomes a playground for us to learn, develop and get stuck into, rather than a frightening, intimidating trap waiting to get us!

Centering yourself 
One simple way to mindfully center yourself is as follows:

  • Sitting of standing comfortably, locate the approximate center of your torso, somewhere between the heart and the solar plexus, mid-way between the front and back, left and right halves of the body. Don’t worry to much about exactness, just find the approximate literal physical center of your body.
  • As you breathe in, breathe your body energy into your center, feel your life-force and energy gathering there. As you breathe out, relax from this central point, feeling your life-force flowing from the centre of your body to the periphery.
  • Take a few breaths like this to physically, psychologically and energetically center. Relax into the solidity of this feeling

Turning and facing 
From this position of centre, being to mind a challenge that you are facing, one that might normally cause you to move into a state of avoidance, anxiety and passivity. Turn and face this issue, being mindful to stay centered, even as different emotions come up. Be curious, caring and courageous, what do you notice as you then amd face?

Responding pro-actively
Think to yourself ‘How can I engage in this challenge benevolently, creatively and pro-actively? What can I try? What can I offer?’
Your answers to these questions is your invitation to overcome your passivity, and get stuck in!

Watch Toby’s 45 Second mindfulness video  – Overcoming passivity:

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com

In case you missed this article: Mindful Optimism

Finding optimism 
What is the state of optimism like? Here are a few characteristics that occur to me:

  • Joyful-ness, enthusiasm
  • A sense of being supported by tangible and intangible forces in the world
  • The feeling of a bright and possibly exciting future ahead
  • The reasonable expectation good things are going to happen to you, both now and in the future
  • An expansive, bright and comfortable feeling in the body, as if you belong in the world, and you can operate there with ease
  • Read full article  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreatIn a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 2-5pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Motivation and scope Presence and being present

Mindful Optimism

“We don’t need to wait for optimism to come to us, we can cultivate it and learn to generate it deliberately in and out of meditation. By doing so it can become a state that is instinctive and intuitive for us, rather than happening only occasionally and circumstantially.”

 

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article is an exploration of the state of optimism. If you enjoy it, we will be meditating on it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class.

Quick practical note, the timings for the Psychic Self-Defence Masterclass and Mini-retreat have now been adjusted to be both on Saturday 27th March.

In the spirit of optimism,

Toby

 

Mindful Optimism

Finding optimism 
What is the state of optimism like? Here are a few characteristics that occur to me:

  • Joyful-ness, enthusiasm
  • A sense of being supported by tangible and intangible forces in the world
  • The feeling of a bright and possibly exciting future ahead
  • The reasonable expectation good things are going to happen to you, both now and in the future
  • An expansive, bright and comfortable feeling in the body, as if you belong in the world, and you can operate there with ease

If you think about times when you have felt optimistic in the past, you may start to notice that it is a bit like my description above. What other qualities characterize your own experience of optimism?
We don’t need to wait for optimism to come to us, we can cultivate it and learn to generate it deliberately in and out of meditation. By doing so it can become a state that is instinctive and intuitive for us, rather than happening only occasionally and circumstantially.

The Brightness of your life-force
To me optimism is very related to an overall sense of life-fullness. The experience is feeling full of life, with your life-force strongly present in the body, radiating out from your center into your energy field and into the world. Being optimistic makes you creative and solar, rather than passive and resigned.

Why optimism is difficult and pessimism is often easier
It can be easier to be pessimistic than optimistic. Reasons for this include:

  • Our natural psychological bias toward negative thinking and threat detection
  • Cognitive overload and emotional exhaustion
  • Anxiety
  • Previous traumas and negative experiences
  • A sense of being helpless in the face of the overwhelming problems of the world that are beyond our control

Each one of these factors is worth acknowledging within ourselves in order to release and let go of. The space and we create by doing this we can then begin to fill with conscious optimism.

Optimism, reason and reasoning
As well as the feeling of optimism, it’s well worth looking for verifiable facts in our life that make optimism reasonable and realistic. For example if I look at the state of my (own and my family’s) health, friendships and business right now there is a legitimate, factual basis for optimism. It’s important to have facts to back up our optimism, because pessimism, depression and anxiety often come as an overwhelming feeling. They ‘feel’ real, even if they have no basis.

Embodying and acting from optimism
We can back up the feeling of optimism by deliberately speaking optimistically and acting in a way that is consistent with optimism. For example, if I am talking to a friend about a problem that I am having, I usually make a point about why the challenge could be a good thing for me and all concerned. This way of speaking about it frames it in a way that makes it feel and seem like there is plenty of room for optimism, even if some aspects of what is happening are unpleasant or difficult.

Balancing optimism with critical thinking
Optimism makes it easier to face up to problems and challenges because we feel less intimidated by them. It is then easier to see drawbacks, problems, uncertainties in a critical and objective way, that doesn’t threaten our sense of optimism, and is indeed complementary to it.

PS: Life-fullness, which I mention in Paragraph 2 is also the style of coaching that I offer, the unique characteristics of which you can read about and watch here.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 1.15-4.15pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

 

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

 

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 1.15-4.15pm  – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Energy Meditation Enlightened love and loving Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

The state of connected

“The capacity to enjoy a benevolent intimate connection to ourself is a key energizing force. If we feel comfortable on our own skin, if we like who we are and spending time with ourself, if we can trust ourself to be on our own side, then we will feel confident and energised when alone”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article is an exploration of the state of connection. If you enjoy it, we will be exploring it in the Tuesday and Wednesday meditation class.

In the spirit of connection,

Toby

 

 

 

The state of connected (A node in a web)

Instinctively as humans we feel strengthened and energized by a sense of community and connection. Here are four ways that you can mindfully cultivate a state of connection and the benefits that it brings.

  1. Independent interdependence – The first observation is that, on one level, the notion of independence and separation is an illusion. We are in a dependent relationship to others in a myriad of ways. The food we eat, the clothes we wear all come from the work of others. Nominally independent, the reality is that we live in a state of continuous interdependence on others. Just this recognition can help is to start to appreciate connection and relationship in a different way. We want to combine our sense of independence and interdependence into a complementary whole.
  2. Connected to yourself, comfortable in your own skin – We are in relationship to others, but for most of us the first disconnect happens with ourself. The capacity to enjoy a benevolent intimate connection to ourself is a key energizing force. If we feel comfortable on our own skin, if we like who we are and spending time with ourself, if we can trust ourself to be on our own side, then we will feel confident and energised when alone.
  3. Supported by others – When you aren’t feeling good about yourself, or if you are feeling tired, we can start to unconsciously self-isolate, and feel lonely, without support. Deliberately remembering and opening to the relationships we have with others whose basic intention toward us is supportive and benevolent is a simple and powerful way to calm and energize ourselves as we go through challenges.
  4. Environmental connection & participation – There is a three-way connection that you can be aware of here; the earth/planetary being beneath you, the sky, stars and universe above (and around in the big sense of the word) you, and the landscape and forces of nature immediately around you. When you are surrounded by an artificial and man-made environment, it is easy to forget and cease to leverage upon the natural communion and connection that we have with the planet, nature and the universe.

An image for connection – A node in a web
Imagine your energy field around you like a ball of light. Imagine it to be like a node or connecting point in a huge web of energetic connection above you, below you, around you. You can see the threads of this web extending from your energy field to other nodes; people and nature around you, the planet beneath you, the stars, sun and moon above. Imagine yourself being fed with positive energy by all of the threads connecting your energy field to these other sources. You can also feel yourself giving energy to those around you via these threads. You are giving and receiving in a way that is creating energy and wellbeing for both you and those you are connected with. You can focus on the feeling of being generally connected, or on your connection to particular people or sources. Relax with this image and with the feeling of being connected for as long as you want. Allow it to give you a sense of your own living state of connection, and the energy that it makes available to you.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com  

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 3-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

In a sentence: Learn how you can effectively defend yourself from negative people, energies and places outside of yourself, as well as the fears and problematic emotions that you feel present within yourself using simple & specific mindfulness & meditation techniques.

Overview:

  • How can I keep myself strong, directed & happy when other people around me are negative, unhappy or even consciously or unconsciously verbally/psychologically attacking me?
  • When I am under stress and can feel my own negativity, anxiety, depression, anger & so on surfacing, how can I defend myself effectively?

Read full details

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditationThe Spring Equinox in the northern hemisphere marks the mid-point between the cooler, darker seasons of the year and the lighter, warmer ones. The forces of day and night, light and dark are of equal strength. As such it represents time to emphasize balance and harmony, both in our life and meditation practice.

It is also good time to attune the life-force in the earth and creative energies within ourselves. We will be taking the time to get in touch with the new ideas, energies and creativity within ourselves as they emerge like new plants and flowers in spring…read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Starts Tuesday/Wednesday evening February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course

Saturday 27th March, 10.30-12.30 & 3-5pm – Psychic & Psychological Self-defence Master class & retreat

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Spring Equinox balancing and renewing meditation

Tues 23rd & Weds 24th March – Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Awareness and insight Enlightened service Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Mindfulness Motivation and scope

Self-responsibility – Becoming a self-determining entity

Dear Integral Meditators,

What is the link between mindfulness and self-responsibility? This weeks article explores the interface of these two.

In the spirit of self-determination,

Toby

 

 

 

 

Self-responsibility – Becoming a self-determining entity

We are surrounded by forces that are attempting to move us in one direction or another, capture our attention, stimulate desire, take our energy. We can experience this directly these days by going on our phone: Social media competes with email and Whatsapp for our attention. Advertisers seek to get our attention to buy their products. Often we go on our phone with one intention, but end up doing another thing! Of course, it’s not just our phone where this happens. Cultural and social forces place pressure upon us to conform, as does peer pressure and the fear of missing out. Amidst all of this what we really want, what will really make us happy, what we really seek to achieve can get completely lost amidst the distraction.
One if the things I find most inspiring about mindfulness is that it enables me to take charge of direction and action in my life. It enables me to become what Nathaniel Branden called a ‘Self-determining entity’.  What this means is someone who controls their destiny and direction, someone who is organised enough to stay focused on the face of distractions. In short, someone who is taking responsibility for their life.

Awareness and acceptance
Before we talk about being responsible, in mindfulness terms we need to talk about becoming more aware and accepting. It’s difficult to take responsibility for our life if we lack rudimentary self and environmental awareness, and if we are continually fighting with our reality rather than accepting it. You can read a bit more about these in my previous articles on self-awareness and acceptance.

What am I responsible for?
One simple guiding question I ask myself a lot is “What is it that I am responsible for in this situation?” I try to discern the things that I need to grasp and direct. For example, I am primarily always responsible for the care of my emotions, thoughts, and physical body. Other people can help and assist, but it is my responsibility. In a team context I need to know what my role is, and what I am responsible for communicating. Questioning in this way helps me to grasp and own responsibility for what is mine.

What am I not responsible for?
A second and often equally important question I ask is “What am I not responsible for here?“, or “What is the responsibility of others here?” Quite often without realizing it we take on responsibility for the problems, emotions and tasks of others without realizing we have done so. For example, I need to be there to support my daughter and what she is going through, but if I try and solve all her problems for her, I am actually denying her opportunities for growth and self-knowledge.
Also, some people are actively (tho often unconsciously) looking to evade responsibility for their challenges, and to push them onto someone else. We can easily find ourselves wrestling with and having our energy taken away by things that are, quite simply not our responsibility.

What do I need to take responsibility for today?
Think about what you face today, or over the next 24 hours. Mindfully frame it within the context of self-responsibility. What is your responsibility to own/solve/carry, and what is not? Your journey to responsible self-empowerment begins today.

Article © Toby Ouvry 2021, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com   

Watch Toby’s short video on taking responsibility: 

 

Saturday 6th & 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow – Masterclass and Mini-retreat

Are you interested in learning a form of meditation that will:

  • Help you to get in touch with a deeper level of psychological harmony and wellbeing within yourself?
  • Access new levels of energy and confidence?
  • Discover and heal hidden aspects of your psyche that are currently sabotaging your happiness in daily life and transforming them into something useful and powerful within you?

Read full details

Tuesday 9th & Wednesday 10th February – Lunar New Year Meditation 2020: Developing your stamina, willpower and self-confidence in the year of the Ox This is a meditation to welcome in the lunar new year energies, and attune to the astrological animal of the year, the Ox!
In particular, we will be mindfully aligning with and developing our inner-stamina, willpower and self-confidence, which are personal characteristics of the Ox.
Toby will be leading the meditation as a simple and profound way, with plenty of room for our own personal contemplation, inner healing and positivity building!
Read full details
Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

 

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday 2nd & Wednesday 3rd Feb, 7.30-8.30pm – Bright, Mother and Weaver Goddess meditation

Saturday 6th & 20th February – Meditations on the Language of Your Shadow – Masterclass and Mini-retreat

Tuesday 9th & Wednesday 10th February – Lunar New Year Meditation 2020: Developing your stamina, willpower and self-confidence in the year of the Ox

Starting February 23rd/24th – Meditations for thriving and energy creation amidst Covid – A seven week course (Full details soon)

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
creative imagery Inner vision Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology mindful dreaming

Your emotional feeling tones

“By starting to notice and to play around with your emotional tones, you discover that you can ‘change the song of your life’ like a composer re-working her compositions.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article points out some playful ways to work with your emotional experience and range using mindfulness, I hope you enjoy it!
Last call for the 2021 New year releasing and inviting meditation, The Wednesday live class is already full, there are a few live slots for the Tuesday session, and of course online attendance is possible.

I am currently plotting the events for January 2021, watch this space!

In the spirit of composing your feelings,

Toby

Your emotional feeling tones

One way of thinking about emotions is that they are ‘The feeling tone associated with any experience’. By experience here I mean a broad range of things:

  • Different thoughts you have
  • Of a conversation or social interaction
  • Of a place; its atmosphere and ‘tone’
  • Of an image or memory that comes into your mind
  • In response to something that happens to you
  • Of a time of day

Each experience has a different feeling tone, like the note on a musical scale. Moreover, our own feeling tones are interacting with the emotional tones of other people and of our environment. Sometimes this creates a beautiful symphony, and sometimes this creates an almighty racket!
We are not in charge of the feeling tones of others, but we can start to become more aware of our own habitual feeling tones and patterns. If we do this we can then start to see how we can change our feeling tones and moods for the better, and put them into more beautiful ‘musical combinations’ with each other. Ways of starting to do this include:

  • Noticing the feeling tone that arise with particular thoughts, images and memories you have. Rather than looking at the content of the thought, look at the emotional tone of it.
  • With particular patterns of thought and image, you will notice that the feeling tones they produce for you are brighter and more harmonious. You can focus on deliberately holding these thoughts and images as a way of raising the vibration of your feeling tones.
  • You will notice that there are some images related to landscape and place that, when you think of them naturally raise your emotional tone. Likewise passages of music, images of characters in stories that you know (and so on) can all lift your overall feeling tone.
  • If you notice that you get stuck in a negative or ‘low level’ feeling tone, you can practice just experiencing it as a feeling tone, rather than taking the content too personally!
  • If you notice that a friend or colleague you spend time with really lifts your feeling tones, then deliberately open to them and allow their tones to affect you when you are with them. Similarly, if there is someone whose emotional tones bring yours down, then when you are with them, then practice ‘closing’ your energy to them in their company, so you are not so affected.

In a coaching session the other day I explained to a client that sometimes it is like your range of feeling tones is a bit like being one type of composer. Maybe if you notice are a more ‘serious’ composer like a Wagner or a Beethoven, you might like to introduce another composer into the mix. For example, you could practice creating more playful feeling tones like a Mozart or a Vivaldi. Or if your feeling tones are all ‘heavy metal’ you might like to practice creating feeling tones like a Prince, Taylor Swift or other more whimsical pop star. Of course this works the other way around; if you are all Taylor Swift and Mozart, maybe practice bringing a bit more gravitas into your feeling tones.
When you start to work mindfully with your feeling tones, it can be very creative and playful. By starting to notice and to play around with your emotional tones, you discover that you can ‘change the song of your life’ like a composer re-working her compositions.
Enjoy playing with your feeling tones!

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com

 

Tues 29th & Weds 30th Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – 2021 New year releasing and inviting meditation
About the class: This meditation session is focused upon  setting up the 2021 new year energies in a way that invites the best possible experience moving forward. We will be:

  • Releasing and letting go of energies, events and experiences from the past year that may hold us back from moving into our full potential, and
  • Developing a flexible, soft, ‘beginners mind’, renewed and ready to be ‘born again’ with energy and enthusiasm in 2019
  • Focusing both consciously and intuitively upon the inviting of new energies, aspirations and goals that we wish to bring in and manifest over the course of the new year

Full details…

Re-starts Monday January 11th! – 7-8.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

How can you move from coping to thriving in your life as a man?

Much is asked of men in their traditional roles as fathers and sons, partners and husbands, students and teachers, employees and employers. The men’s group is a professionally moderated and confidential forum for men. A forum is a safe place for exploring, learning and sharing the successful perspectives, skills, and strategies needed to address and manage the unique issues, problems, and triumphs in our community.
Read full details…

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?
Read full details…

 

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tues 29th & Weds 30th Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – 2021 New year releasing and inviting meditation

Re-starts Monday January 11th! – 7-8.30pm – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

January 16th & 23rd – Shamanic meditation and mini-retreat (Details to follow!)

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Awareness and insight Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Self-Leadership Primal Spirituality

Working mindfully with your subconscious mind

“As the conscious mind you are trying to connect to your subconscious mind with a sense of care and warmth, inviting co-operation and teamwork”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article looks at how you can start using mindfulness to work with your subconscious mind, enjoy!
Beneath the article is the full line up for classes and workshops for December, there is a lot of variety to choose from!
This  weeks Tuesday and Wednesday meditation 1st & 2nd December are the Monthly full moon manifestation meditations, you are all welcome, live or online.

In the spirit of the subconscious,

Toby

Working mindfully with your subconscious mind

Mindfulness – Strengthening the executive function of the conscious mind
Mindfulness is essentially attention and awareness training. As such it involves primarily strengthening the executive power of your conscious mind to direct your attention to create desired experiences and make better choices. Implicitly, part of mindfulness involves becoming aware of and working with our subconscious mind and its functions. This is where mindfulness backs onto the arena of disciplines like hypnosis, which specializes in working with the subconscious. My shadow meditation method and coaching is also an example of working directly with elements of the subconscious mind. Since our subconscious plays such a powerful part in creating our life experience, its well worth developing our proficiency in working with it.

Horse and rider – Creating a benevolent, co-operative relationship between your conscious and subconscious minds
Your subconscious mind is a repository of your instincts, biology, habits, and past experiences. As such its energy is a lot ‘stronger’ than the conscious mind. If you try and dominate your subconscious by sheer force of will, you are only going to get so far. One simple image is that of a horse and rider. The conscious mind is the rider, the SCM is like the horse. The horse is much stronger than the rider, but if the rider can tame the horse and establish a co-operative relationship, then the power of the horse becomes at the service of the rider.

An attitude of care and warmth – Establishing trust
So if you are going to work with your SCM, it needs to trust you, and your intention toward it (like a horse with someone who wishes to ride it). As the conscious mind then, you are trying to connect to your SCM with a sense of care and warmth, inviting co-operation and teamwork.

Intention, instruction, direction
With this attitude of benevolence and trust established, you can then practice feeding your SCM intentions, auto-suggestions images and directives according to what you want it to do for and with you. There are a larger number of ways to do this, for example:

  • You can create an inner place or landscape where you can sit and invite your SCM to release repressed or unacknowledged emotions for healing
  • You can suggest to it ways of seeing the world that are in alignment with your life goals
  • You can program it to react to certain scenarios in a particular way when it comes up in real time

One point to realize is that you are making suggestions signalling to your subconscious mind all the time anyway. Most of the time this is habitual and unconscious. If we can start doing it consciously and deliberately, then it can change our experience for the better.

A simple example
Right now from around 11.30pm-5am every night, I am in charge of feeding and caring for our baby. That is a clear instruction to my subconscious mind. As a result I am very sensitive to our babies sound and movement. As soon as anything starts to happen, I wake up, get up and attend to her. After 5am its my wife’s turn, and again that is a clear message to my subconscious mind. As a result the baby is crying and making a ruckus, if it is after 5am, generally I sleep right through it, even if she is right on the bed next to me. My SCM has knows it doesn’t need to alert me when the baby cries, so I sleep!
That’s a small example of the power your SCM has to create and define your experience.

What ways can you start mindfully working with your subconscious mind today?

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com

Tuesday & Wednesday 1st & 2nd Dec @ 7.30-8.30pm – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

We all live our life within an environment that consists fundamentally/experientially of the Earth, Moon, Sun and Stars. The monthly lunar cycle describes our relationship to the Moon, and the powerful influence that it has on our life. In the physical world we see this influence most obviously in the tides of the sea. In our inner life we experience it as the coming and going of energy, moods and emotions within our psyche. This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month. Read full details

Saturday 12thth December 3-5pm – Mindfulness masterclass: Mindfulness for thriving with anxiety & uncertainty

Anxiety is a natural response to uncertainty and change, but for many of us the experience of anxiety is disturbing, upsetting, draining and stressful. This session focuses on practical ways to change your relationship to anxiety by:

  • Accepting and working with your causes of anxiety
  • Building greater awareness and appreciation of the things that give you stability and security in life
  • Learning to think effectively and wisely around uncertainties and problems that are causing you anxiety

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

 

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in December:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday & Wednesday 1st & 2nd Dec @ 7.30-8.30pm – Live & Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Saturday 12thth December 3-5pm – Mindfulness masterclass: Mindfulness for thriving with anxiety & uncertainty

Tues & Weds 15th, 16th  December, 7.30-8.30pm – New moon health visualization and envisioning sessions

Saturday December 19th, 2.30-5pm – Integral meditation deep dive mini-retreat

Tues 22nd & Weds 23rd Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – Winter solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Tues 29th & Weds 30th Dec, 7.30-8.30pm – 2021 New year releasing and inviting meditation

Ongoing – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Categories
Awareness and insight creative imagery Energy Meditation Enlightened Flow Inner vision Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Shadow meditation

Your bright shadow – The one who can do what you can’t

“The sum total of all the hidden strengths that you have within yourself but are in denial around is sometimes called the ‘bright shadow’”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores a topic that has been very present and important in my own practice for a good while now, the bright shadow. Some parts require careful reading, but I believe you’ll find it worth it if you do!

In the spirit of the bright & luminous,

Toby

Your bright shadow – The one who can do what you can’t

Your shadow is
A good working definition of our shadow self is: “All the parts of our personality and self that are unacceptable to our self-image”. Because these parts of ourself are unacceptable to our idea of who we think we are, most people repress and deny them psychologically, hence they get pushed into the ‘shadows’ of our unconscious mind. From their position in the unconscious, our shadow then tries to push its agenda from, without the awareness of the conscious mind.

Its not just your dark shadow that is unacceptable
A lot of the conversation about the shadow is about the so called ‘dark’ side of it. We repress violent parts of ourself, sometimes sexual elements, aspects of power, domination and a range of other destructive emotions. The specifics of course varies from person to person, as we all have a different self image.
But it is not just the so perceived ‘negative’ qualities that we repress. There are many strengths and ‘bright’ qualities that we also repress for the same simple reason: They are not part of who we think we are and what we think we are capable of, so we don’t identify with them, even though they are present within us. The sum total of all these hidden strengths within ourelf is sometimes called the ‘bright shadow’.

The bright shadow as an already present part of you
In the last couple of years the way in which I have been working with my own bright shadow is imagining it as an already complete and capable part of myself that I connect to in visualization, and then begin to imagine myself AS. This is a bit like Tantric meditation, where you accelerate the speed at which you achieve the results by imagining strongly that you have already achieved it!

A few examples
Here are a few aspects of my bright shadow that I have been working with in the last 12 months:

  • The bright part of me that is strong and confident in the face of uncertainty, and the twists and turns of fortune
  • The bright part of me that is happy being somewhat vulnerable and afraid, enjoying it and not having to hide behind so much ‘surface level’ manly strength
  • This week I wasn’t feeling well physically, as had to rest. I connected to that part of my bright shadow whose sense of confidence was not connected to physical well-being, and can navigate these few days relatively easily and happily despite the discomfort.

The basic method
In each of these examples the process is basically the same, I visualize my bright shadow, imagining him as already present whole and complete. I then study and relate to him. When ready I imagine myself AS him, living and experiencing this moment as if I fully possess his qualities and capacities.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com  

Saturday 21st November 2.30-5.30pm – Finding Freedom From What Holds You Back in Life: Practical meditations & techniques for working with your shadow-self

The RESULTS that you can expect to gain from engaging in this workshop are:

  • The ability to self-heal parts of your psyche that are in pain and in need care and attention
  • A greater feeling of overall wholeness and wellbeing
  • More physical, mental and spiritual energy in your daily life
  • Deeper self-understanding, reduced fear and greater emotional freedom
  • Greater harmony and success in your relationships with other people (because you no longer project your shadow onto them)
  • Full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in November:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Saturday 21st November 2.30-5.30pm – Finding Freedom From What Holds You Back in Life: Practical meditations & techniques for working with your shadow-self

Ongoing – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Biographical creative imagery Integral Meditation Life-fullness Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindfulness

Liberation from your roles & labels – Three examples

“The essential art of mindfully liberating ourself from our roles and names is to recognizing a role, name or label that we identify with closely, Learn to “drop” or dis-identify ourself from that role and then to then pick up and play the role with freedom in a newly interpreted and useful way”

Dear Integral Meditators,

Quite a lot of the coaching and corporate work I do these days involves playing mindfully with roles, names and labels. In the article below I outline the process and give three practical examples, so you can start playing the game in your own life!
Saturday 3-5pm I’ll be facilitating the Mindfulness masterclass: Liberation & creativity through the observer self (Finding freedom in your roles) , if you enjoy the article, then do feel free to join us, either in person or online!

Last call for the annual meditation on our own inner light in the run up to Deepavali this Tuesday and Wednesday evening.
And finally, this Sunday there is the New moon health visualization and envisioning session

In the spirit if mindful creativity,

Toby

Liberation from your roles & labels – Three examples

Much of the structure of our ego and self-concept basically revolves around names, roles and labels that we have become familiar with and identify with closely

  • “I am the troubleshooter in my business team”
  • “I am the arty child in the family”
  • “I am a victim because of this or that event”
  • “My value is that I am an academically qualified doctor”

These roles and labels give us some security in the sense of having an identity, but they also limit us and prevent us from growing. The essential art of mindfully liberating ourself from our roles and names is:

  1. Recognizing a role, name or label that we identify with closely
  2. Learning to “drop” or dis-identify ourself from that role, to separate our identity from it
  3. To then pick up and play the role with freedom in a newly interpreted and useful way
  4. To try out other roles and labels that are different from or opposite from the original, and integrate them into our ‘identity repetoire’

Three examples:

The inner critic becomes the intelligent critical thinker
In a corporate training last week I led on “Aspiring to excellence whilst dancing with imperfection”, we spent some of the time recognizing the ‘negative perfectionist‘ that many high performers identify with. We put that role down, and then after a while picked it up again and re-interpreted it as the ‘good quality critical thinker‘ that is constructive and helpful with regard to producing great work. We also began to play with the role of the ‘Non-judgmental self‘ as a complementary contrast.

The invulnerable one one becomes the vulnerable one
For a long time I was quite identified with ‘the invulnerable one‘ or the one who feels no fear. In a workshop on emotions about 2 years ago I focused on putting down that label and allowing myself to feel fear and venerability. By doing so I was able to start playing with and integrating the positive expression of ‘the vulnerable self‘ into my personality and daily actions. The ‘invulnerable one’ remains available to me, but I am no longer compulsively identified with it, I can pick it up or put it down as I wish.

The messy one and the one in control
With the recent addition of my baby daughter Liv to the family, I found myself struggling as the one who wanted things to be ‘ordered and in control‘. As life is naturally quite messy when you have a baby, I practiced putting down the ‘ordered’ label and playing with an ‘I’m happy for things to be messy’ label. As a result, I was able to relax into the chaos more and enjoy the process! That doesn’t mean I no longer play the ‘ordered one’ or the ‘one in control’, it just means I play it when its useful and appropriate, not unconsciously and inappropriately.

Enjoy playing with your roles, names and labels with creativity and freedom!

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com  

Saturday 14th November, 3-5pm – Mindfulness masterclass: Liberation & creativity through the observer self (Finding freedom in your roles)

Learn how you can use mindfulness to find liberation from and creative freedom within the roles, names and labels you identify with in your life
Almost all of our lives are spent playing out different roles, names and labels that we have become identified with over the course of time. These roles and labels define our sense of who we are and, to a large extent what we believe is possible for us…
Full details

 

Tues 10th, Weds 11th November, 7.30-8.30pm – Deepavali Meditation – Connecting to your inner light

In this session we will be taking some time to:

  • Connect to our own ‘inner light’ in meditation, as a way of conquering the ‘darkness’ of our own inner confusion and fear
  • Sharing our inner light with our own personal circle of influence, and with the world
  • Taking our inner world journey to meet our own inner world guides who will offer us the light of their guidance at this time in our personal journey

Full details

Sunday 15th November, 6-7pm – New moon health visualization and envisioning sessions

About the session: This class is done monthly around the turn of the new moon and enable us to open to new beginnings, new possibilities and make a fresh start, specifically with regard to physical health and psychological wellbeing
Full details

 

Saturday 21st November 2.30-5.30pm – Finding Freedom From What Holds You Back in Life: Practical meditations & techniques for working with your shadow-self

The RESULTS that you can expect to gain from engaging in this workshop are:

  • The ability to self-heal parts of your psyche that are in pain and in need care and attention
  • A greater feeling of overall wholeness and wellbeing
  • More physical, mental and spiritual energy in your daily life
  • Deeper self-understanding, reduced fear and greater emotional freedom
  • Greater harmony and success inyour relationships with other people (because you no longer project your shadow onto them)
  • Full details

 

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

 

All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA in November:

Ongoing – Weekly Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tues 10th, Weds 11th November, 7.30-8.30pm – Deepavali Meditation – Connecting to your inner light

Saturday 14th November, 3-5pm – Mindfulness masterclass: Liberation & creativity through the observer self (Finding freedom in your roles)

Sunday 15th November, 6-7pm – New moon health visualization and envisioning sessions

Saturday 21st November 2.30-5.30pm – Finding Freedom From What Holds You Back in Life: Practical meditations & techniques for working with your shadow-self

Ongoing – The Men’s Group – The path of conscious manhood

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Biographical Inner vision Insight Meditation Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Resilience Presence and being present Primal Spirituality

Messiness, unlabelling, unknowing

“Drop the labels that most affect your peace of mind and effectiveness in life. Learn how you can change your experience in real time around real issues using unlabelling.”

Dear Integral Meditators,

This weeks article explores how you can change your experience by becoming aware of and dropping your labels. Enjoy!
I will be doing the Sunday and Wednesday online meditations on the subject of the article, mindfully unlabelling.
Then on Tuesday evening the live and online session at One Heart will be the Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session.

In the spirit of unlabelling,

Toby

PS: you can also watch my short video on mindful unlabeling.

Messiness, unlabelling, unknowing

My messy life
Right now my life feels vey messy and dis-organnized. We are two months into the arrival of a new member of the family, and the arrival of the baby has meant a fair amount of scrambling around, trying to get things done and often failing! There are small piles of unfolded laundry in my office, objects strewn over the different tables and surfaces of the house. Workwise I have different threads unfinished, deadlines that I’m having to be flexible about. All of my relationships, family, friends, colleagues are all in flux. Sometimes my mind is just screaming “this is all too messy, I need order!” it feels difficult to live with.

Where does the ‘messiness’ really come from?
On a deeper level, rather than the problem being the messiness, its really more about my relationship to the messiness. Its not that the untidiness of my apartment is inherently unbearable, its that my idea of what messy is and what it means is conflicting and stressful.

Unlabelling
The quickest and most effective way out of my problem with messiness is simply to drop my idea and mental label of things being ‘messy’. As soon as I drop the mental label, then the ‘problem’ of my messy apartment disappears(!) The thing here is not that I have changed my external environment, but that I have stopped projecting my labels upon it. From its own side my apartment isn’t messy or tidy, it just IS exactly what it is. With my apartment and life exactly as it is right now, I have a place of peace and stability I can go to and relax in simply by dropping my labels. This is important because it means I can tolerate difficult, messy situations without it stressing me out.

Unlabelling and primal meditation
In chapter one of Lau Tsu’s Tao Te Ching he says “The unnamable is the eternally real. Naming is the origin of all particular things”* . When you drop your naming and labelling process, you drop into a space of label-less, name-less, though-tless unknowing that puts you directly in touch with our experiential reality. This opens up a whole new way of participating in life, that most people loose at quite an early age.

Sitting with “unlabelled unknowing”
So, as a meditation you can start getting some experience of this practice by doing the following:

  • Sit and notice the way in which your mind is projecting names and labels on everything around you and within you.
  • Practice putting those labels down, and relaxing into a state of experiential ‘unlabelled unknowing’
  • Do it not just momentarily, but for gradually extended periods

Practicing with specific labels and challenges
It’s a good idea to practice this with things that are a real challenge for you, like me and my ‘messiness’. Drop the labels that most affect your peace of mind and effectiveness in life. Learn how you can change your experience in real time around real issues using unlabelling.

Watch Tobys’ short video on mindful unlabeling:

*Stephen Mitchell translation. Alternative translation by Gia-Fu Feng “The nameless is the beginning of heaven and earth. The named is the mother of ten thousand things”.

Article content © Toby Ouvry & Integral Meditation Asia 2020. you are welcome to share, but please cite the source, thanks! Contact info@tobyouvry.com  

Tuesday 4th August, 7.30-8.30pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

This meditation, done on or around the full moon capitalises on the heightened lunar energies at this time of the month to:

  • Bring energy and health to our physical body
  • Increase benevolent, life affirming emotions such as appreciation, joy and gratitude
  • Release patterns of energy, thinking and feeling that are no longer serving us
  • Focus on clarifying our intentions and manifesting our current life-goal

Read full details

Life-fullness – The Integral Life-Coaching Program with Toby

Are you looking a coach who can help you to:

  • Meet the challenges, stress and changes that you face in a more effective and mindful way
  • Become happier within yourself, in your relationships and at work
  • Be actively accountable for finding a sense of balance/well-being in your life and fulfilling your personal potential?
  • Guide you to find and operate from a deeper sense of meaning, motivation and connectivity in your life?

Read full details…

Stress-transformation coaching with Toby

Stress, anxiety, fear, pressure, anger, attachment – Ordinarily we see these states of mind and emotion as negative; things that get in the way of our happiness and well-being, and prevent us from achieving the goals and quality of life that we would like.

But what if there was a way in which we could learn to work with these negative and difficult energies in such a way that we could transform and redirect them, making them sources of positive and empowering energy, helping us to accomplish our goals and awaken to a new level of fulfillment?

Stress transformation coaching with Toby is exactly that; it shows you how you can transform your stress, anxiety and other difficult emotions into forces for the good in your life…
Read full details

Online Integral Meditation & Mindfulness classes

Build focus, beat stress, cultivate wellbeing!

Each session involves simple practices that you can apply to make a real difference to your wellbeing and effectiveness in life…full details of classes

At a glance: All upcoming classes and workshops for at IMA:

Ongoing – Weekly Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday Online class schedule

Ongoing on Wednesday’s, 7.30-8.30pm – Wednesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby (Bukit Timah)

Ongoing on Tuesday evenings, 7.30-8.30pm – Tuesday Meditation for stress transformation and positive energy with Toby  (East Coast)

Tuesday’s at 12.30-1.20 – Ongoing Tuesday Lunchtime meditation class @Space2B

Tuesday 4th August, 7.30-8.30pm – Online Monthly Full Moon Meditation & Manifestation Session

Coming soon – High performance bootcamp: Using mindfulness to operate at your peak without burning out

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses * 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology