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A Mind of Ease creative imagery Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Primal Spirituality Zen Meditation

Sitting unself-consciously – The primal pre-present

“Sit unself-consciously, like a tree – Birds come to eat and nest. Animals rest in its shade. Yet the tree does not know itself. It follows its own nature. It is as it is.”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

Cultivating unself-consciousness & living a conscious life may sound like a bit of a contradiction, but bringing them together is a great way to make your meditation & life more effortless & natural!

If you enjoy it, you’d be welcome to join this week’s Tues/Weds or Saturday Zen meditations, where we will be exploring the pre-present moment as a gateway to meditation.
 
In the spirit of natural-ness,

Toby

PS: This Saturday: The Six Healing sounds: Qi gong for Self-Healing & Inner Balance Workshop



Sitting unself-consciously – The primal pre-present
 
In my previous article on the four types of present moment awareness I define the primal pre-present as:
 
“Essentially the “present moment” before we had any idea of time. We could also think about it as being the “pre-conceptual present.” Babies are always in the pre-present moment, because their minds have not developed the power of conceptuality, they have no idea of what the past or future is, and so their mind remains placed firmly in the here and now, before time existed! Likewise, animals live in the pre-present because they have non-conceptual minds. Similarly trees and rocks can be thought of as abiding in the pre-present, the time before concepts and before the past and future came into existence”

Meditating on the pre-present enables us to:

  • relax, returning to a state of innocent awareness
  • tap into a state of deep regeneration and re-energization

 
We ourselves can meditate on the pre-present simply by:

  • deeply observing a (peaceful) baby, or an animal
  • sitting quietly in a landscape and just dropping our sense of time temporarily, becoming like a tree or a rock or a baby, with a mind that has forgotten all sense of time and abides in the peaceful space of the pre-present, the pre-time

 
The pre-present, the eternal present & non-duality
 
Dropping into the pre-present enables us to access the non-dual, or Eternal Present, which is the recognition that everything that is happening is always happening NOW. To quote again from my previous article:
 
“The eternal present in many ways resembles the primal pre-present, but to be able to really appreciate and value the eternal present we must have gone into conceptual time, understood and lived within it, and then see through its illusion. You could say that the eternal present is the post-transient present.
Meditating on the eternal present gives us maturity of vision, depth of perception, a sense of everything possessing its own natural perfection, and opens us up to our first classical “enlightenment experiences”.
We can meditate on the eternal present by simply recognizing that every aspect of our experience right here right now is contained within the embrace of the eternal present, and learn to relax our awareness into that ever present, eternal space”

 
Two quotes for meditating unself-consciously
 
A nice way to approach the above two types of present is to simply meditate unself-consciously, placing yourself in a state that is natural, close to nature and non-conceptual.
 
A mountain poem

Imagine yourself sitting on the side of a mountain. Imagine your body and the mountain merge, be the mountain. From the Chinese poet Li Bai:
  
“The birds have vanished down the sky.
Now the last cloud drains away.
We sit together, the mountain and me,
until only the mountain remains.”

The second quote is a favourite of mine from the Forest Monk teacher Ajahn Chah:
 
“People have asked me about my practice. How do I prepare my mind for meditation? There is nothing special, I just keep it where it always is. They ask “Are you an Arhant?” (Liberated being) Do I know? I am like a tree in the forest, full of leaves, blossoms and fruit. Birds come to eat and nest. Animals rest in its shade. Yet the tree does not know itself. It follows its own nature. It is as it is.”
 
Sit naturally, forget yourself, follow your own nature, as you are.

Related article: Scratching out your name card, & other gateways to Zen meditation

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com



All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Tuesday 2nd & 3rd September, 7.30-8.30pm, & then weekly – Integral Meditation from the Perspective of Zen – A 10 week series

Saturday 6th September, 5.30-6.15pm, & then weekly – Zen meditation Deep-dive – A 10 session practice series

Saturday 20th September, 5.30-6.30pm – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation

Saturday 20th September, 9am 12.30pm – The Six Healing sounds: Qi gong for Self-Healing & Inner Balance Workshop

 17 Oct 2025, 8am-12pm & 21 Nov 2025, 8am-12pm – The wisdom of Zen meditation practice retreat & course, levels 1&2

Saturday 29th November, 7-9pm – Living Life From Your Inner Center – Meditations for Going With the Flow of the Present Moment


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Integral Meditation Asia

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A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Zen Meditation

Zen ergonomics – Sailing with, rather than rowing against life

“How might I start to sail with this?”

Dear <<First Name>>, 

This week’s article explores an image that I use a lot in my coaching practice, and that also have found to be of enduring value in my own life challenges. If you enjoy the article, then you are invited to the upcoming free seminar this Wednesday!

In the spirit of sailing rather than rowing, 

Toby



Free online seminar – Sailing with life, not rowing against it: Re-discovering your lightness & beginners mind through Zen meditation
 
Date: Wednesday 27th September 2025
Time: 7.30-8.30pm Singapore time

If you can’t make the session live, let us know & we would be happy to send you the recording!
 
Overview: How can we find a way of encountering life and its challenges where we are working with what we are experiencing, rather than against it? Why does life sometimes seem to get heavier and less spontaneous as time goes by? How can we stay simple and calm in the face of the sometimes bewildering complexities of our life?…read full details
 

 



This week’s article: Zen ergonomics – Sailing with, rather than rowing against life
 
Zen – Buddhism meets Taoism
 
Zen is a non-dual school of meditation, and a Mahayana Buddhist one. Being a non-dual school means that is aims at a direct perception of reality As It Is, rather than as our mind thinks it is. To be a Mahayana school essentially means that Zen is underpinned by the motivation and aspiration of universal wise compassion, aiming to help all living beings find a release or liberation from their suffering.
 
Zen also offers an ergonomic approach to life, meaning that it aims to help us relax into our challenges and tribulations, rather than fighting with them. By learning to gradually accept things as they are and as we find them, we can find ways to work with what is going on rather than fighting it. It is very practical and ‘earthy’ in a way that combines the ‘transcendence’ of Buddhist meditation with the nature-based ‘flow’ philosophy of Taoism.
 
Sailing – working with, not fighting against
 
Alan Watts often used the image of sailing rather than rowing to give a sense of how this works. If you have a particular situation you are facing, notice the way in which you are approaching it. Are you trying to fight to overpower it, or are you relaxing into it, trying to find a way of relating to what is going on that is skilful? Fighting with a situation is like being in a boat and trying to row against the wind – every stroke takes effort, you pit your strength and energy against the wind and every stroke takes toil. A ‘sailing’ approach on the other hand involves trying to catch the wind and work with it, to use the energy to help you. If the wind is against you, then a good sailor knows how to tack, or sail diagonally into the direction of the wind, so even if the situation is difficult or challenging, we are looking to find ways to use it rather than fight it!
 
Centering, putting down concepts, your self-concept & entering relaxing into the beginning
 
Before you think about what to do in a situation to sail rather than row, it’s good to simply be present to it. A few pointers for this:

  • Center yourself in your body, in the moment. Try and feel the centre-line of the body, the mid-point between the front and back of the body, and the left and right halves of the body that runs from your crown to your perineum. Take a few slightly deeper breaths if you need to relax
  • Put down thinking, clear your mind. If you can’t stop thinking, then a skilful way is to not think about the thinking; be present to thoughts without causing them to generate more thoughts (if that sounds a bit Zen, it’s because it is!)
  • Notice and then put down your self-concept. Don’t just put down your thoughts, also notice you are carrying an idea of yourself into the situation; all the labels, roles and images you have about what and who you are
  • Relax into the beginning. Meet your situation in the moment, the now, free from your ideas about it, and what it should or shouldn’t be. Try and resist the temptation to start seeking a solution or a fix, just take your time being present with it, and relaxing into that as best you can

 
From this position of relative center, presence and relaxation ask yourself the question, “How might I start to sail with this?”
 
The better you get at sailing, the more relaxed you become under pressure, the less exhausted you feel when you become tired, and the more you notice how many small ways there are to sail through your life challenges with a degree of enjoyment, pleasure and creativity!
 
Related articlesNot thinking about thinking –  A Zen approach to non-conceptual awareness


© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Tuesday 2nd & 3rd September, 7.30-8.30pm, & then weekly – Integral Meditation from the Perspective of Zen – A 10 week series

Saturday 6th September, 5.30-6.15pm, & then weekly – Zen meditation Deep-dive – A 10 session practice series

Saturday 20th September, 5.30-6.30pm – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology


 

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A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Enlightened Flow Integral Meditation Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Stress Transformation

Cycles of receiving, gratitude, & joy

“The more joy you feel, the easier it is to open in a state of receptivity, which leads to more gratitude, which in turn leads to more joy, in a virtuous cycle!”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

What might be a  skillful way of getting a better return on investment from your process of mindful attention? in this week’s article I outline a method that I have been enjoying this summer in my own practice.

In the spirit of virtous cycles, 

Toby


Cycles of receiving, gratitude, & joy
 
Integral mindfulness = Virtuous cycles of attention
 
Integral mindfulness is, in large part about putting together different elements of mindful attention in a way where the sum of the different elements produces a bigger effect than the individual parts. It’s a skillful way of getting a better return on investment from your practice. What I’m going to outline below is a cycle that I have been enjoying this summer in my own practice.
 
The receiving, gratitude, joyfulness cycle
 
Receptivity – This involves placing oneself in a state of receiving; openness to receiving all the good energy and experiences that are available to you in the moment. When we are open to these good things we can receive them. Receiving them is a little bit like, instead of just looking at nice food, you actually put it in your mouth and eat it! Receiving is like intentionally ingesting what is being given you in life, experiencing it in a way that then leads to the next stage…
 
Gratitude – If I am receiving and ‘eating’ the good things that life has to offer me, then it’s natural and relatively effortless to feel appreciation and gratitude for them. Its different from just making a gratitude list, because my receptivity is giving me an experience, a ‘tase’ that I can enjoy. This goes beyond the mere intellectual recognition. When you eat food, you start to feel full, satisfied, replete. This then leads to the third stage…
 
Joyfulness – Receiving and feeling grateful then gives us a sense of joy, a wonderment in being given a life to lead that has so much to offer us. This then leads to our being able to open receptively to good things as they come up in the moment, and feel joy as we are doing them rather than after the event. You might think of joyfulness (in this context) as spontaneous gratitude; the capacity to recognize and receive the good energy in life that is being offered right now!
 
Putting yourself in a state of receiving – As you sit and breathe now, gently soften your body, putting is in a state of receiving and receptivity.

  • Receiving the air that nourishes your body each breath
  • The love and care available to you in your relationships
  • Your health
  • Your ability to live a human life today that has freedoms

 
Let gratitude emerge from your state of receptivity – No need to try too hard, just let the thankfulness emerge naturally and easily from your experience of receiving. If you notice any inner resistance, don’t force, just stand at the doorway and wait until your mind and heart are ready to walk through.
 
Feel the fullness of joy emerging from your gratitude – You have been receiving energy, which helps you to feel fuller, to start to regenerate your energy. You have ‘eaten’ what you have received, which has led to experiencing gratefulness. From the gratefulness, now let the sunlight of joy start to emerge. It shouldn’t feel like much hard work.
 
The more joy you feel, the easier it is to open in a state of receptivity, which leads to more gratitude, which in turn leads to more joy, in a virtuous cycle!
 
This week I have been getting over the jet-lag from traveling back to Singapore after a few weeks in Europe. Jet lag as I’m sure you will know can make you feel pretty dreadful and discombobulated. Whilst awake in the middle of the night and in spare moments during the day I have been practising the receiving-gratitude-joy cycle, which has made the challenge of the jet lag much easier to navigate. So don’t wait until things are perfect in your life to give this a go, it’s a great way to mitigate pain and suffering!
 
Related articlesMindfully eating your thoughts
For every suffering a joy – cultivating positive non-attachment
A flower opening to the Sun – Choosing (& making distinctions around) joy


 © Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Saturday 16th August, 9am-12.30pm – Taoist Pranayama & Breathwork Workshop – Improve physical health, wellbeing & inner peace though deep breathing
 

Saturday 23rd August, 3-4.30pm – One Heart Open Day: Sound of Zen meditation with singing bowls

Saturday 30th August, 7-9pm – Living Life From Your Inner Center – Meditations for Going With the Flow of the Present Moment

Tuesday 2nd & 3rd September, 7.30-8.30pm, & then weekly – Integral Meditation from the Perspective of Zen – A 10 week series

Saturday 6th September, 5.30-6.15pm, & then weekly – Zen meditation Deep-dive – A 10 session practice series

Saturday 20th September, 5.30-6.30pm – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

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Awareness and insight Insight Meditation Integral Awareness Integrating Ego, Soul and Spirit Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Mindful Confidence Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership

Being self-determining vs receiving help

“I am not the center of the universe; but I am the center of my universe”

Dear <<First Name>>, 

This week’s article explores the relationship between mindful self-responsibility & receiving help from others. Another way of thinking about this is the interface between your intra-personal dynamic (relation to self), & your inter-personal dynamic (relation to others & the world). I hope you enjoy it! 
 
In the spirit of self-determination,

Toby



Being self-determining vs receiving help
 
You are not the center of the Universe, but you are the center of your life
 
I’ve written quite a lot in the past about becoming a self-determining entity. Self-determination means recognizing that you are the most powerful force in your life (not in the universe, just your life!), and to take ownership of that power. This then enables you to direct your life creatively toward the good. It means recognizing two positions that help to balance each other:

 
Becoming self-directed
 
‘No one is coming to save me’ is one of my ‘quotes to live by’. I find that in difficult situations, stopping looking outside of myself for help and just focusing on what I can control, and what I can do for myself is both calming and empowering. It is not a shutting off from outside help, it is just a clear recognition that it’s really my job to look after my life and its direction. It’s not:

  • Not my Mum’s job
  • Not my partners
  • Not my business-partners
  • Not my children
  • Not my friends
  • Not my boss’s
  • Not my employees

It’s my job and responsibility to work through and work out the challenges in my life to the best of my ability, and I do in fact have some ability!
 
Although no one is coming to save me, many people may like to help!
 
Becoming self-directed means that we are not looking for someone outside of ourself to save us, and we are doing what we can to move forward in our life challenges. The paradox of this is that, when other people see us being like this, it is an attractive quality. People tend to like and even feel inspired by others that they see being pro-active, intentional, and taking responsibility for themselves. Consequently, even though we may not be asking for help, quite often we find friends, family and colleagues offering help and assistance freely and happily. So, there is a virtuous cycle that gets established between being self-determining and receiving help.
 
Abandoning your power, cutting yourself off from assistance?
 
There are two ‘extreme’ positions that we are trying to avoid here:

  1. Being a victim, not trying to help ourselves effectively, and over-asking, or expecting others to solve our challenges
  2. Becoming so narrow in our sense of self-determination that we cut ourself off from the assistance of others, even if it is freely offered, and would be of help to us

Being self-determining doesn’t exclude ever asking for help, or accepting it when offered. It just means that we are taking solid responsibility for ourself, and being personally pro-active. Becoming self-determining even includes getting good at asking for help when appropriate.
 
In conclusion then, being a self-determining person, and receiving / asking for help can be seen as complementary capacities that when put together make our life both easier and fuller of creative potential!
 
Related articleBecoming a Self-determining entity – Five stages to mindful self-leadership
 © Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com



All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Ongoing Tuesday & Wednesday’s weekly, 7.30-8.30pm – Embodied Transformation – An integrative introduction to Tantric meditation

Ongoing on Saturdays weekly, 5.30-6.15pm – Embodied Transformation – Saturday Tantric deep-dive meditation sessions

Saturday 16th July, 9am-12.30pm – Breathwork Workshop – Improve physical health, wellbeing & inner peace though deep breathing

Saturday 23rd August, 3-4.30pm – One Heart Open Day: Sound of Zen meditation with singing bowls

Tuesday 2nd & 3rd September, 7.30-8.30pm, & then weekly – Integral Meditation from the Perspective of Zen – A 10 week series

Saturday 6th September, 5.30-6.15pm, & then weekly – Zen meditation Deep-dive – A 10 session practice series

Saturday 20th September, 5.30-6.30pm – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Awareness and insight Inner vision Insight Meditation Integral Awareness Integrating Ego, Soul and Spirit Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Mindful Self-Leadership Presence and being present

Inter-connected or over-connected?

“Reduce your device time & increase time spent enquiring into interdependence to go from feeling ‘over-connected & lonely’ to ‘Inter-connected & supported’”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

I’ve recently facilitated some corporate workshops on ‘Digital Detox for Corporate Professionals: Reclaiming Focus and Productivity’. Creating this workshop & seeing people’s response to it has really opened my eye’s to how chronic the problems around overuse of devices are for us these days. In the article below I explore a simple flip to go from ‘over-connected, overwhelmed & lonely’ to ‘inter-connected & supported’. I hope you enjoy it!
 
I’m almost completed with the new meditation programs starting in August/September, you can see the full line up in the Whats On section beneath the article.
 
In the spirit of connected,

Toby



Inter-connected or over-connected?
 
What is my relationship to the world? Is a question is one worth asking yourself and seeing what sort of answers and perceptions come back to you. Your sense of your relationship to the world is fundamental, it forms the basis of most of your other perceptions, choices and experiences in life. For many people, the temptation is to experience ourself as someone coming into life from the outside, an outsider who dies not belong, and has to ‘fight’ to earn their place. Life is a battle to belong, rather than an enjoyment of your sense of already belonging.
A ’flip’ that I continue to enjoy is that of being born from life, rather than into it. To quote from a previous article on the subject:
 
“Our relationship to it is like that of an apple or a leaf to an apple tree. The apple emerges from the Life of the tree itself, not as something separate from the tree. The life of the tree gives rise to the apple. The apple arises from the tree itself, in the same way that the tree came from the life in the apple that it grew from.
You are like the apple being born from the apple tree. The life in you is a part of Life, you are an expression of Life, and Life is you.”

 
Being ‘born from life’ gives us a sense of effortless belonging, which is a great and un-lonely place to begin feeling into our connection of self-to-world.
 
Observing interdependence – Inter-connected & supported
 
We can strengthen our sense of feeling connected to the world by seeing, through contemplation, the way in which we are all interconnected. There are innumerable ways in which we can do this, to give three short examples:

  • I am writing this article on my parents dining table. To be able to use this table I rely on the carpenters that made it, the wood supplier, the trees it came from (and by implication the forest, not to mention my parents’ hospitality!
  • I can do the same thing with the computer that I am writing on; so many people involved in the supply chains that put the machine together, created the software and so forth, for me to then buy and use relatively effortlessly
  • I’ve just finished a coffee whilst writing. Again, to get the coffee to me relies upon the water from the tap, the coffee supply chain, the supermarket, the coffee plant, the land that the coffee plant grew on…

In any aspect of my life, if I start to look at the interdependence that doing what I am doing relies upon, my wisdom-eyes open, and I start to see how intimately and fully I am connected to everything else in the world. From this comes gratitude of course, but also a fundamental reduction in my loneliness. I am always inter-connected, and in this way never alone in a lonely way!
 
Over-connected & lonely
 
The above two states of being and feeling interconnected contrast sharply with the experience of many people who are what you might call ‘over-connected’ through their phones and being online all the time. Our devices enable us to be ‘connected’ and ‘in-touch’ all the time, however this experience paradoxically leads many to feel lonely, left-out (and afraid of being left out), isolated and yet compulsively over-connected.
 
A few practice points:
 

  • Reduce, and manage wisely the amount of time you stay connected to the world through your devices
  • Use the amount of time you save from reduced device time to develop the wisdom of interconnectedness and belonging outlined in sections one and two of this article. This wisdom does not need to be hard work, it’s really just about grounding yourself in the recognition of it. Your inter-connection is fed easily and gently by the recognition!

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Ongoing Tuesday & Wednesday’s weekly, 7.30-8.30pm – Embodied Transformation – An integrative introduction to Tantric meditation

Ongoing on Saturdays weekly, 5.30-6.15pm – Embodied Transformation – Saturday Tantric deep-dive meditation sessions

Saturday 16th July, 9am-12.30pm – Breathwork Workshop – Improve physical health, wellbeing & inner peace though deep breathing

Saturday 23rd August, 3-4.30pm – One Heart Open Day: Sound of Zen meditation with singing bowls

Tuesday 2nd & 3rd September, 7.30-8.30pm, & then weekly – Integral Meditation from the Perspective of Zen – A 10 week series

Saturday 20th September, 5.30-6.30pm – Autumn equinox balancing & renewing meditation


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
Energy Meditation Gods and Goddesses Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Presence and being present Primal Spirituality spiritual intelligence Tree of Life

Mindful of: Your masculine & feminine balance

“If our masculine and feminine energies are harmonized, it is a huge plus for our inner resilience and sense of wellbeing.”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article looks at working with your masculine & feminine balance. If you enjoy the article, you’d be welcome to join us for the Wednesday class & Saturday class where we will be working with this topic! 

If you are interested in Qi gong then do check out my workshop on Saturday 12th July, 9am-1pm – Qi Gong for Improving your Health and Energy Levels & for Self-Healing

In the spirit of your feminine/masculine balance, 

Toby 


Mindful of: Your masculine & feminine balance

In this article I want to explore a few mindful positions around your sense of the masculine and feminine energy within you, and how to bring them together into a harmonic, or mutually supportive partnership. If our masculine and feminine energies are imbalanced, or fighting each other, then this can be a source of conflict and dissonance. If they are working together, it is a huge plus for our inner resilience and sense of wellbeing.

Male & female, masculine & feminine

One thing to distinguish initially is the difference between your male and female energy on the physical and biological level, and our masculine and feminine. It is possible to be physically male and very feminine in terms of energy balance, or female biologically and quite masculine in energy balance. Obviously, we are either a man or a woman, and we will have a sense of how we experience that. We will also, as a man or woman have both masculine and feminine energy flowing through us. It is worth reflecting upon this, making the distinction, and then starting to get an intuitive sense of your own point of balance in terms of masculine and feminine polarities.

A balancing chart

Here is a list of masculine and feminine qualities, roughly arranged in complementary polarities:

It is not the only list, or a ‘complete’ list, but by looking over it you can start to give name and form to some of the natural polarities in terms of masculine and feminine, yin and yang energies. The idea with each of them is to build BOTH qualities within yourself, in a way that they are complementary, mutually supporting and ‘aware’ of each other. For example, if you take the first one, Loving and powerful, which is a fundamental one. Tune into the part of you that is loving in various ways. Then tune into the part that is powerful and expresses power. Working with them consciously, you can practise becoming both powerful and loving in your expression of your thoughts, words, relationships, and actions.

Merging your masculine & feminine self

Sitting quietly, imagine that on either side of you, you have a man and woman. Recognize these as being embodiments of your masculine and feminine selves. Feel into their energy on both sides of you to get a sense of both. When you are ready, as you breathe in, feel both figures moving inwards toward you, so that eventually their bodies merge with yours. Experience yourself as being one masculine and feminine being, balanced, harmonized and strong.
If you like you can do this exercise with one of the polarities in the above list. For example experiencing the ‘willful’ part of your masculine energy in the man, and the ‘nurturing’ aspect of your feminine energy in the woman. Then proceed with the merger as described.

Related articlesThe middle way
Polarity meditation – Working consciously with tension

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Biographical creative imagery Energy Meditation Inner vision Integral Awareness Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation and Psychology mind body connection Mindful Resilience Presence and being present Primal Spirituality Qi gong

The Freedom of your inner garden

“Work in the inner garden of your mind a little bit every day, like you would work on an outer garden to give it a sense of order & beauty”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article takes a look at inner and outer gardening. If you enjoy it, it will be the subject of this week’s Tuesday, Wednesday class. You would be welcome to join, either live-in-person, or online!

Beneath the article you can see the full list of events for June, including the Meditation & Mindfulness for working with your Child-self  workshop, and the summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation.
 
In the spirit of our inner gardens,

 
Toby


The Freedom of your inner garden
 
Cultivating an inner and outer Garden space
 
Yesterday, Sunday, I spent about an hour in the front and back garden, bringing a bit of order to the gentle chaos that it was becoming. I dug out the root of a Banyan tree at the back that had gone rogue, and I trimmed the jasmine bushes at the front, putting some eggshells and fertilizer in their pots. The great thing about doing any kind of gardening work is that, by the end of it your mind often feels wonderfully clear and peaceful. As well as the peaceful feeling, there is the sense of having brought order and harmony to the physical space, a sense of benevolent control. This in turn changes (for me at least) the overall sense of having some control and order in my life. When I walk through my front gate now, I have the feeling of satisfaction of having nurtured the garden, and I see the plants I have worked with.
 
In one sense of course this can also be taken as a metaphor for the ‘inner garden’ of our mind. Mindful attention is very much about noticing and nurturing focus on the things in life you can appreciate and feel good about. Yes, parts of your life may feel in chaos or dis-order, but don’t forget to notice the parts that aren’t (the inner equivalent of jasmine bushes in the above example), and feel good about the work you’ve done today to bring order to the chaos (the Banyan tree root above).
 
Your energy body and your environment
 
Gardening work and indeed any time in contact with nature can open up some interesting meditation capacities. Here are a few simple ways in which I work with the energy of the environment and nature regularly:

  • Feet on the ground, in meditation or walking, feel the light and energy from the Earth rising up into your body, activating its vitality. Feel like you have a body of energy interpenetrating your physical body. With your light body, sense into the mineral, plant, and elemental (earth, water, air, fire) energies around you. Let this contact feed and balance you inwardly.
  • Feel your belly area to be a focus point for your biological energy. Breathe in and out of your belly, feeling the natural bliss of your life-force and vitality building in that space.
  • Feel your heart-centre to be connected to the sun and its energy. See a beautiful sun at your heart. Breathing in and out of it, making the heart-zone of your body bright, loving & strong
  • Feel your head to be connected to the energy of the sky and stars. See a bright star-light in the centre of your brain, connecting you to the natural Freedom and spaciousness of the sky and stars all around us.

The above are all very simple focus points that, when you take the time to dwell upon them can lead you into quite deep meditation states relatively easily and quickly, it is not hard work!
 
Related reading: Finding energy through meditation – Aspects of meditating with your energy body
Meditating with the energy of trees & plants
Trees, birds & Octopuses – Achieving harmony by letting be

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Ongoing Tuesday & Wednesday’s weekly, 7.30-8.30pm – Embodied Transformation – An integrative introduction to Tantric meditation

Ongoing on Saturdays weekly, 5.30-6.15pm – Embodied Transformation – Saturday Tantric deep-dive meditation sessions

Saturday 24th May, 10.30am-12noon – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Level 1 – Friday 30th May, 8am-4pm, Level 2 – Friday 13th June, 8am-4pm – Freedom & Fullness – A practical introduction to Non-Dual Meditation Practice Retreat & Course

Tuesday 17th, Weds 18th June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Saturday 21st June, 2-5pm SG time – Meditation & Mindfulness for working with your Child-self  


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Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease creative imagery Inner vision Integral Awareness Integrating Ego, Soul and Spirit Life-fullness meditation and creativity Meditation techniques mindful dreaming Mindful Resilience Mindfulness Presence and being present Primal Spirituality

Essential Freedom – On the mindful ‘big three’ & Awakening

“Daily intention, attention, and awareness can be experienced as expressions of our essential Freedom, Love & Bliss”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article takes a creative look at how to bridge basic mindfulness & deeper states of Awakening. If you enjoy it, it will be the subject of this week’s Tuesday, Wednesday class. You would be welcome to join, either live-in-person, or online!
 
In the spirit of our essential Freedom,

 
Toby


Essential Freedom – On the mindful ‘big three’ & Awakening
 
This article weaves together the fundamentals of mindfulness practice with some essential ‘Tantric’ elements. By ‘fundamentals of mindfulness’ I mean working with our basic intention, attention, and awareness. By Tantric, I mean seeing and experiencing these three in qualities their essential, purified, or awakened form. What it offers is a space where we can explore the space between simple mindfulness and higher/deeper states of meditation presence in a way that is creative and playful.
 
The mindful big three
 
As I mentioned, your ‘mindful big three’ are intention, attention, and awareness. They are three what you might call ‘all accompanying characteristics of our everyday consciousness, meaning they are there and functioning pretty much all the time whilst we are awake and sleeping.
 
Intention is what moves us to step into action. With mindfulness we are trying to be more conscious and less automatic about our intentions, so that they become more caring, constructive, and high quality.
 
Attention is directed by our intention. If our intention is mindful, our attention will then be focused towards to where our intention channels it. We marshal our attention with our intention. High quality attention then helps us to be more effective in life, and to enjoy it more.
 
Awareness is our potential to be conscious; it is consciousness itself. Our awareness follows our attention. The energy of our consciousness awareness follows where we place our attention.
 
 
Awakened mindfulness – Freedom, love & bliss
 
So, each moment of our consciousness has these three dimensions, intention, attention, and awareness. What I want to do now is describe a visualization that enables us to relate to these three in their pure or essential form:
 
Freedom of intention – Imagine your intention as a star sitting in the center of your head/brain. It sits in the freedom of an open sky, and when you focus on it you can feel that open, spacious freedom.  Its light is the light of your conscious intention that you can use to navigate your life successfully and wisely.
 
The Heart of loving attention – See your attention as a diamond at your heart, the facets of the diamond reflecting and radiating rainbow lights around it. The rainbow diamond represents all the different ways that your attention can be directed to yourself and the world in a loving, skillful, benevolent, and compassionate manner.
 
The bliss of your Ocean of consciousness – See in your lower abdomen there is a drop of water that contains the entire ocean. This is your Blissful Ocean of consciousness, the source from which awareness comes from. If you relax into this Ocean in your belly, you can feel your consciousness becoming open, blissful & calm, like the depths of an Ocean.
 
Putting it together:
 
You can meditate on the star in your head as your essential, awakened Freedom of intention. In daily life you can use the star-image to create and stay with mindful, conscious intentions
 
You can meditate on the diamond at your heart as your essential, awakened Love. During the day you can use the diamond image to be creative with the different ways you can make your attention loving, constructive and benevolent.
 
You can meditate on the drop of water in your belly as an Ocean of Bliss-Consciousness. During the day you can be dropping into this simple, blissful state of awareness to recharge, relax and recover, before moving back into more active states of intention and attention.
 
Related readingThe holy trinity of mindfulness
Indestructible safety (On Therapeutic & Tantric mindfulness)

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Ongoing Tuesday & Wednesday’s weekly, 7.30-8.30pm – Embodied Transformation – An integrative introduction to Tantric meditation

Ongoing on Saturdays weekly, 5.30-6.15pm – Embodied Transformation – Saturday Tantric deep-dive meditation sessions

Saturday 24th May, 10.30am-12noon – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Level 1 – Friday 30th May, 8am-4pm, Level 2 – Friday 13th June, 8am-4pm – Freedom & Fullness – A practical introduction to Non-Dual Meditation Practice Retreat & Course

Tuesday 17th, Weds 18th June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Meditation & Mindfulness for working with your Child-self – Workshop: Saturday 21st June, 2-5pm SG time, & 
session seriesSession 1 – Monday 23rd June, 7.30-9am (7.30-9pm Eastern time US), Session 2 – Tuesday 24th June, 7.30-9am (7.30-9pm Eastern time US)


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Energy Meditation Insight Meditation Integrating Ego, Soul and Spirit Life-fullness Meditating on the Self Meditation and Psychology Meditation techniques mind body connection Mindful Resilience Presence and being present

Re-awakening the Bliss of your childhood

“Reconnecting to your bliss can have a profound effect on everything else; pain is less wearing, emotional dissonance is easier to harmonize, disappointments & life’s curve-balls are easier to work with”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article takes bliss and childhood as the subject. If you enjoy it, it will be the subject of this weeks Tuesday, Wednesday & Saturday class. You would be welcome to join, either live-in-person, or online!

Quick reminder of the The Call of the Wild: Shamanic Meditations for connecting to animal guides in the inner world Masterclass & Mini-retreat over the weekend!

In the spirit of thoughtful bliss,
 
Toby


Re-awakening the Bliss of your childhood
 
When connecting to the bliss of being alive came naturally
 
When I was a young boy, I used to ‘twiddle’ my hair. This meant taking a lock of my hair between my index & middle fingers and rubbing it gently between the two. This very quicky sent me into a relaxed, semi-trance state that felt very naturally blissful. This bliss was a physical feeling in my body, not an abstract idea. When it happened, the front of my tongue would rise to the top, front of the roof of my mouth, where I would feel it ‘suck’ rhythmically, like a baby sucking on a bottle, or a breast. Twiddling my hair could go on for long periods, like in the back of a car whilst on a weekend journey. My parents literally called me ‘Toby twirl’ because of this habit, which lasted actively until my early teens.
After my early teens, I forgot about twiddling my hair for several years. But when I started practicing Qi gong, and meditating, I noticed that that familiar ‘sucking’ of my tongue on the roof of my mouth returned, along with the feeling of bliss in my body at certain times. This was something of a discovery, because once I had connected to the experience of childhood bliss, I found I could very easily go into a state of meditation by recalling the experience of twiddling my hair, and activating the feeling of blissful aliveness in my body. The bliss was/is really useful, because it makes it easy for the body-mind to relax, and to stop thinking about stuff. If you can access a state of bliss, since it is so much more pleasant to feel blissful than worried, it easy to choose feeling blissful over compulsive stress, at least for some of your day!
 
So, then I have a question for you; do you have any memories of childhood bliss, like the ‘hair-twiddling one’ that I mention above? Perhaps it was in your childhood, but it might have been later, in your teens, or a passage of your adult years. If you can find such a memory and remember it, then that can then act as the basis of your own re-awakening to bliss in the here and now.
 
Re-connecting to that cellular memory now
 
When you recall your experience of childhood (or other) bliss, what will happen is that you will activate your body’s cellular memory of it. This means you activate the feeling of the blissful memory in the body, and so actually start to experience a little bit of the bliss in the present moment. If you dwell upon that feeling now, you can grow it back to the power of it’s original state, thus bringing back the regenerative energy of bliss into your life. Just a few minutes a day of reconnecting to your bliss can have a profound effect on everything else; pain becomes less wearing, emotional dissonance is easier to harmonize, disappointments and life’s curve-balls are easier to accept and work with.
 
The bliss-work is nice to explore as a practice by itself, but there are also two further ways in which you can enhance the building of your bliss are:

  1. Combining it with core cellular breathing
  2. You can combine it with the meditation on Making yourself bigger

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Saturday 10th & Sunday 11th May – The Call of the Wild: Shamanic Meditations for connecting to animal guides in the inner world Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Starts Tuesday 6th, Wednesday 7th May, 7.30-8.30pm – Embodied Transformation – An integrative introduction to Tantric meditation

Starts Saturday, 10th May & then weekly, 5.30-6.15pm – Embodied Transformation – Saturday Tantric deep-dive meditation sessions

Tuesday 13th & Wednesday 14th May, 7.30-8.30pm – Wesak compassion & inner visioning meditation

Saturday 17th May, 3-4.30pm – One Heart Open Day: Heart Opening meditation with singing bowls

Tuesday 17th, Weds 18th June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation

Saturday 24th May, 10.30am-12noon – Get Your Meditation Practice Started Now – The Shortest and Most Time Effective Meditation Workshop Ever

Level 1 – Friday 30th May, 8am-4pm, Level 2 – Friday 13th June, 8am-4pm – Freedom & Fullness – A practical introduction to Non-Dual Meditation Practice Retreat & Course


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology

Categories
A Mind of Ease Biographical Energy Meditation Insight Meditation Integral Meditation Meditating on the Self meditation and creativity Meditation techniques Mindful Resilience Presence and being present Primal Spirituality spiritual intelligence Zen Meditation

Taking the mountain with you

“The only Zen that you find on top of a mountain is the Zen that you bring with you” – Robert M Pirsig

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article looks at how to embody the energy of a mountain, its a fun idea with serious applications!

Lots of great events & courses coming up soon, scroll down below the article to have a look! 

In the spirit of the mountain, 

Toby
 



Taking the mountain with you
 
‘Taking the mountain with you’ is a Zen expression. It means that if you are a meditator, rather than needing to go to a mountain to ground, de-stress and recover your balance, you become like the energy of the mountain. By meditating consistently, as you walk around in the city or wherever you go, you take the energy of ‘mountainous-ness’ with you.
You can also take the image of the mountain as a metaphor for enlightenment, or awakening. When we are stabilized in the art of awakening, wherever we go we take that awakening with us, because we embody that energy.
 
“The only Zen that you find on top of a mountain is the Zen that you bring with you” – Robert M Pirsig.
 
When I was a monk, there were always members of the Buddhist group that I was in who were obsessed with the idea of going on retreat. They felt that, once they had done a six-month or one year retreat, somehow that would have attained a special state that would once-and-for-all mean that they never had to be bothered by ordinary states of mind and body again. They were looking for a one knock-out punch! Needless to say I also listened to several stories from these people regarding returning to ordinary life after their long retreat and feeling like they were back to square one after a disappointingly short time!
 
Bring the mountain you’ve got
 
One middle-way that I have found useful is to simply commit each day to bringing the ‘mountain that you have got’ with you into your life each day. What this means is that you bring to front and centre that part of you that is calm, balanced and stable like a mountain each day. Simply be that to the greatest degree that you are able.
 
A mountain poem
 
The birds have vanished down the sky.
Now the last cloud drains away.
We sit together, the mountain and me,
until only the mountain remains.
– Li Bai
 
Some meditation positions
 
Sit or stand like a mountain. At first imagine you are standing or sitting on a mountain. There is you and the mountain. Feel into the calmness, solidity, and presence of the mountain, gradually relax into this until as the poem says, “We sit together, the mountain and me, until only the mountain remains.” Go from being with the mountain to being the mountain. Work with this until there is no self-and-mountain, only ‘mountainous-ness’.
 
In daily life, try and return to this feeling of mountainous-ness often:

  • When you walk into a room or a meeting, bring it with you
  • Coming home from work, bring it on the train with you
  • Sit down to the family dinner with it
  • Experience your uncertainty with it
  • Through the highs and lows of your life, bring the mountain with you

 
Wherever you go, bring the mountain!
 
Related readingThe body is in you – How to go into deep meditation quickly
Four Zen Meditations
 

© Toby Ouvry 2025, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com


All upcoming classes & workshops
 

Ongoing on Tuesday’s & Wednesday’s (live & online), 7.30-8.30pm – Weekly integral meditation classes

Ongoing on Tues & Weds, 7.30-8.30 pm – Freedom & Fullness – A practical introduction to non-dual meditation practice

Ongoing on Saturdays, 5.30-6-15pm  – Freedom & Fullness deep-dive non-dual meditation sessions

Saturday 10th & Sunday 11th May – The Call of the Wild: Shamanic Meditations for connecting to animal guides in the inner world Masterclass & Mini-retreat

Starts Tuesday 6th, Wednesday 7th May, 7.30-8.30pm – Embodied Transformation – An integrative introduction to Tantric meditation

Starts Saturday, 10th May & then weekly, 5.30-6.15pm – Embodied Transformation – Saturday Tantric deep-dive meditation sessions

Tuesday 13th & Wednesday 14th May, 7.30-8.30pm – Wesak compassion & inner visioning meditation

Saturday 17th May, 3-4.30pm – One Heart Open Day: Heart Opening meditation with singing bowls

Tuesday 17th, Weds 18th June, 7.30-8.30pm – Summer solstice balancing & renewing meditation


Follow Toby onLinkedInYouTubeInstagram

Integral Meditation Asia

Online Courses 1:1 Coaching * Books * Live Workshops * Corporate Mindfulness Training *Life-Coaching *  Meditation Technology