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Patient, or positively impatient?

“Is now the time to be patient and accepting, or is it time to rattle the cage, shake the tree and be positively impatient?”

Dear Integral Meditators, 

This week’s article focuses on a theme that I have found very real and useful in a number of my coaching sessions with clients over the past few weeks.

Making the distinction between patience and positive impatience releases the potential for greater balance and harmony in our life, even when under duress! 

The 15minutes a week Stress-Transformation online program starts next Monday!
It is available at a 50% discount if you get it with either the Wednesday classSaturday Deep-dive or workshop versions of the stress-transfromation programs (which can be done live, online or via recording). 

In the spirit of patient impatience,

Toby



Article: Patient, or positively impatient?
 
Patience, and patient acceptance are major life-skills that, when applied effectively give us more peace of mind, help us reduce unnecessary energy wastage, and increase our effectiveness in the face of challenges.
Patient acceptance can be contrasted with impatience, pushing too hard and at the wrong time, in a way that is often impulsive and not thought out.
 
However, the patience described above also has a ‘lower expression’ characterized by:

  • Accepting things that we should not/ don’t have to accept, for example out of fear and insecurity
  • Going with the flow of a situation that it may be better not to tolerate or stay in
  • Not recognizing that things have changed, and what was appropriate to have been accepting is now something to be appropriately intolerant to

 
Similarly, the imbalanced impatience described above also has a place or context where it becomes ‘positive impatience’. We can use the energy of positive impatience to change things that it is time we changed, break out of patterns that it is time we broke out of.
 
Micro and macro expressions of this balance
 
The patience/positive impatience balance can play itself out on both a larger scale and a more short-term daily/hourly manner.
On a larger time-scale for example, this year I have decided to make certain changes to my work-life where I am really trying to be intolerant to certain older patterns that served me in the past, but if they persist, they are I danger of limiting my progress. Towards these I am applying ‘positive impatience’ or ‘balanced intolerance’. At the same time, I have also noticed that I am feeling tired and impatient with certain of my work practices, but I feel the time to change these or give them up is not yet here. So, in regard to these, I am adopting an attitude of patience and acceptance, relaxing into the flow of them rather than agitating for change.

On a smaller, micro timescale, today I am mixing up family activities, work and household tasks. There are times where I am itching to get on with work, where I will need to accept that urge and then let it go, being accepting that now is not the time. At other times in the day, I may be feeling lethargic or avoidant regarding work but, because it is the right time, I need to be positively impatient and push through the resistance, utilizing my positive impatience. On a daily basis I might oscillate several times between the two, moving from acceptance to impatience as the circumstances demand, or as I see fit.
 
So then, a good question to ask yourself in situations that you face is:
“Is now the time to be patient and accepting, or is it time to rattle the cage, shake the tree and be positively impatient?”
 
 
Related articleAre You Going With the Flow or Just Drifting With the Current?

© Toby Ouvry 2026, you are welcome to use or share this article, but please cite Toby as the source and include reference to his website www.tobyouvry.com 


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